Falling In Between (Falling Novels #1)

Chapter Twenty-Two

I lay there and cried it out for an hour before exhaustion overcame me and sleep embraced me. When I awoke at ten the next morning, Sophie still hadn't come back. Unless Robert bailed and left school last night, she and Jhett must have stayed elsewhere. I was still in bed when she got in at four, having napped on and off all day.

One look at my red, puffy face and Sophie's smile disintegrated and her face went sour. If she were animated, steam would've been blowing from her ears and nose at the moment.

"Alright, Jenna. Enough's enough!" She hit my side, motioning for me to move, and sat down on the edge of my bed. "You've had a month to deal so now I get to say my bit."

I was so tired and numb that I didn't argue. Or really seem to care for that matter.

"Now we both know I don't completely believe in this dream invader crap, but I'm gonna sweep that under the rug for the moment. You put your heart out there for a guy and you got burned. Granted, it's not the typical way to lose a guy, but you obviously loved him or it wouldn't be hurting you this much. But in case you've forgotten, you've got a great guy over in the next building that you haven't lost...yet."

"He did say he loves me," I mumbled.

"Of course he loves you! Even a blind idiot could see that! So stop screwing with him, Jenna! You're seriously pissing me off right now! You're so absorbed in your misery over losing Chance that you don't even see how miserable you're making Robert! The poor guy is stuck in some kind of gut-wrenching limbo with you. And he doesn't know whether to keep loving you or just let you go. Don't keep dragging him along if you can't deal. He's done nothing to deserve this shit."

She released a deep breath of pent up anger, then gently tucked some of my stray hairs behind my ear. "I know you miss him. And I know it hurts. But Chance is gone. There's no shame in grieving that loss, Jenna. Just don't let it consume your life with guilt anymore. "And for the love of God, eat something!" She reached into my cubby, grabbed a pop-tart and threw it at me. "If you get any skinnier you won't fit into my clothes anymore."

I smiled and nibbled on the pastry treat just for her benefit, 'cause I really wasn't hungry. "Why the hell couldn't you say that to me a month ago? It made way more sense than what's been going on in my head all this time."

"Yeah, well. Everyone's entitled to some alone time every once and a while. Besides, you probably wouldn't have listened to me a month ago anyway."

I finished my snack and apparently fell asleep again, 'cause when I woke up it was one in the morning. I hadn't meant to sleep that long. I had wanted to go talk to Robert and lay what I thought was my new problem out on the table for him.

Truth was, I was afraid to love him.

Besides a relationship that was basically made up in my dreams, the only person who'd ever made the effort to love me was Sophie. And that was more a sisterly love, and still a little new to me. The kind of love Robert was expecting was romantic, and allowing myself to become vulnerable in that way terrified me.

Why, you ask? Because if a loss in my dream world could be so devastating, I panicked over what a loss out here would feel like. And I didn't wanna ever feel that way again.

Throwing myself out of bed, I decided a long, hot shower was overdue, but it gave me even more time to worry about talking to Robert. And since it was early Monday morning, I wouldn't be able to see him until at least after school. No way did I wanna endure another day with this mixture of heavy feelings weighing me down.

I dug out some fresh clothes to sleep in and tried to make myself look passable for a living teenage girl, then I braved the walk to his room.