The Key to the Warriors (completed)

Chapter 51

51Charlie

I was second-guessing everything I thought I'd known about Arion, and about the person I'd grown to see myself as while there. My body felt heavy with stress and hurt as I poured over everything Zirlic had said. Maybe I shouldn't have felt so deeply betrayed by it, but I did. Knowing that my entire life had been uprooted just so they could call me in to fix their problems for them was difficult to wrap my head around.

As if Xylem's betrayal wasn't bad enough, insert Zirlic to tell me that he's Jackal's friggen father, and he'd known all along what kind of man his son was, yet he still let him stay in Divincia with the blood of more than five hundred people on his hands.

Maybe it was because I wasn't a parent yet that I couldn't understand that kind of loyalty to your own flesh and blood, but as it was, I couldn't see the logic in it. I just felt used, and it made me wonder who else of my friends may have been holding out on me all along. In the end, would Leo and Jerry betray me as well?

Zyirah was another matter on her own. The mother of my child was the product of incest... Though her parents were only half-siblings, it still left room for worry over how our own child may come out. Just what the hell kind of world had I created to allow for such things...? I couldn't deal with it at the moment. I had to get away before the anxiety buried me.

Storm clouds gathered overhead as I made my way to the sleeping dome, and I scowled up at the thunder as I entered and went to my room. Last thing we needed right now was rain. Zyirah and Mom were sitting on the bed, and both looked up at me as I swiped the glasses and key from atop the dresser without a word to them.

"Charlie?" Mom called, and I heard she and Zyirah following as I left and returned to the field and started up the hill. "Wait, where are you going?"

"Home." I said without looking back, and I heard Zyirah's breath catch. Must have been obvious that I wasn't making a quick run to grab something.

A moment later, she was in front of me, making me stop. "Why are you leaving? What's wrong?"

Tears weighed heavy in my eyes, and I caught her frowning up at the approaching storm as thunder vibrated through the ground. Her face was concerned when she looked at me again.

"Tell me what's wrong. What happened?"

I shook my head. "You wouldn't understand."

"Try me. Please."

For several seconds I stared at her, my eyes sweeping over her face as I came to realize the similarities between her and Jackal. His eyes, his nose, his jawline... and I almost felt sick. None of this was her fault, she didn't even know, but Arion as a whole felt dirty to me at the moment, and I shook my head as I stepped past her.

"I'm sorry. I just need to get out of here for a while."

It was the worst possible time for me to leave with everything that was going on, but it didn't stop me from rushing away from Zyirah and my mom and quickly unlocking the door. I stepped out into a humid morning and pulled the door shut behind me, locked it, then sank against it to hyperventilate. I didn't know what to do, where to go, who I could trust anymore, and the weight of it all was crashing down on me.

Bending my knees, I folded my arms around them and dove into the first panic attack I'd had since the night I went to the lighthouse. My hands shook and my heart thrummed in my chest, making it difficult to catch my breath as I tore off the glasses and fisted them, a whimper escaping me as I did so. Tears slid down my face as I started to sweat, my entire body trembling as I squeezed my eyes shut. Seemed it lasted for a long time before it finally eased and gave way to an empty feeling of depression, and it was more than an hour before I felt like I could move again.