Trio (A Pokemon Fanfiction)

Chapter 14: Companions

Zen POV

"You know," I said, "it's kinda hard to believe that all this started when Lily found me passed out in front of a tree as a Sneasel." Darkness looked at Lily. She shrugged.
"And you, Darkness," I said, "you could've killed me, but you didn't. Why?"
"Because you took my damn knife away," she replied.
"Oh, yeah." I looked at William. "Then you showed up and tried to kill us, but didn't. Why?"
"I needed you to help me defeat Greed," he said quickly. The three of us looked at him.
We found a Pokemon called Xatu or something on our way. All he did was tell us this useless thing and fly off:
"i woulDnt pretend tO know what yoU are Going through, but Let's face It; you'VE got a Short wait ahead of you."
I just can't make sense of it.

Greed has a castle. If anyone ever asks you to name someone with a castle, say "Greed." If they don't, don't say anything, because people who don't ask you questions like that aren't worth talking to.
God, I wish I were Charles Dickens.
We entered the castle. The long corridor stretched out in front of us, with a small bed at the end. Sleeping on it was a Mesprit. She began to stir.
"Huh?" she said tiredly. "Intruders? Eh, it's too early. Want some coffee? Too bad; you're not getting it. Cobalt?" An Azelf floated in. "Kill them for me, please."
"YES SIR, MA'AM SIR!" the Azelf replied, and began throwing tacos at us.
"I see your plan," said Darkness. "But none of us are dumb enough to ZEN PUT THAT THING DOWN"
"But it's a hard shell..." I said. Darkness sighed and grabbed her knife. William grabbed his.
"I'M THE BEST!" Cobalt shouted. "I'M BETTER THAN ALL OF YO--" She fell to the ground. Darkness stood behind her, holding her knife.
"That was too easy," she said, removing the knife from the Azelf's back.
A Uxie floated in, wearing underwear. All I'm gonna say is, there's a reason Pokemon are always naked.
"Zen!" said Darkness. "Go distract Lust!"
"Is that all I am to you?!" I shouted at her. "A sexy distraction?!" I began to tear up.
Lust floated over to me. "I like a man who's not afraid to show emotion," she said seductively. Darkness stabbed her.
"I was totally gonna get laid btw" I said. Darkness rolled her eyes.
The Mesprit began to stir. "Wha...what?!" she said flatly. "You killed them. Whee."
Darkness stabbed her. "Where is your boss?!" she asked the dead corpse.
"Oh, sister," said an unfortunately familiar voice, "don't you know better than to stab first an ask questions later?"