Another Chance ( A Romanogers Story )

22 - "the universe let her came back to you"

chapter 22
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Sam notice the pain that the Captain is feeling as his expression that was before happy turned into a bit gloomy as his smile slowly disappear. "Hey is there something wrong?" Sam asked in concern.

"Everything is wrong Sam." Steve exclaimed. "This feeling, this love, the butterflies I had when I see her, the way my mind is so full of her, the images of her smiling, the image of her laugh and her beautiful green emerald eyes that I will never get tired of seeing. It shouldn't have happened." He added as he looked down sadly.

Sam uncrossed his arms and pat Steve's shoulder with one of his hand. "You know it is never wrong to feel love Steve." Sam said trying to comfort him.

"Then it is probably a lie too when people say that." Steve said with a broken smile.

Feeling the pain from his friend, Sam decided to pull him into a hug.

"I love her Sam, I really do." Steve whispers quietly as he let out a drop of tear. "But as much as I love her, what important for me is her happiness and I know she won't be happy with me." He added with a sad tone.

"And why do you think that way?" Sam asked as he pulled away.

"She always think of herself unworthy, being with me will only make her feel worse." Steve replied. "She will always think about it, every single day and every single time we're together." He said sadly. "And not to mention I also don't have any place in her heart for love." He smiled faintly.

"Instead of thinking like that, why don't you try to make her push away her thoughts of being unworthy." Sam asked.

"I had tried Sam, as a friend of course. But if we somehow ended up together, the thoughts will appear again and she will probably think about it over and over again." Steve said.

"And you want Natasha to feel that way for the rest of her life?" Sam asked firmly. "You should fight for her, you can't just give up from the start. You can make her stop to think that way, we can also help too." Sam said.

Steve doesn't know what to say, Sam was right, he should've fight for her but Steve didn't want to be selfish because he knew Natasha will only see him as a friend, she always will.

"I know and I am sure, Natasha will be happy with you Steve." Sam sighed heavily. "You're a really good man, you cared about her too much and you loved her sincerely. You're exactly the figure that Natasha needed. You both are perfect together." Sam smiled faintly. "Give it a try okay?" Sam asked.

"I'm not sure Sam, I don't want to hurt her." Steve replied. "Really, just staying by herside is enough for me." He added.

"Steve..." Sam said but Steve cut him off. "I have decided to shut this feelings down Sam. I'm not going to fight for her but I will not avoid her, I will still be a friend." Steve said with a broken smile.

"But that will be more painful to you." Sam said sadly.

"Yeah but, I had been doing it for the past 9 years now, well perhaps less or maybe more I'm not really sure." Steve said.

"You're saying that all this time you have been hiding your feelings for her? It's a really long time Steve." Sam said in disbelief.

"Yeah I guess." Steve replied. "All this time I had been falling for her but I keep on denying it." He added.

"But why?" Sam asked.

"It just doesn't feel right so I keep on thinking that I haven't moved on yet." Steve answered.

"Well then what happened to you now?" Sam asked in confusion.

"Perhaps because the major pain that I felt when I lose her, both my eyes and my heart got opened and it made me realise how much I love her and how unable I am to lose her." Steve smiled faintly. "Even though we won the battle, my heart felt really empty knowing that to win it cost us her life and not to mention Tony's too. But they came back, and I think it's enough for me." He said. "It's not that I'm not happy we won and we got everyone back but it's just really painful for me to lose someone, and not to mention that someone happens to be the woman I love." He added as he looked down sadly.

"It's okay I get it." Sam said. "So are you really going to waste this opportunity Steve?" Sam asked. "Coming back to life is not a small thing. Are you sure you're not going to give up?" Sam asked in concern.

"Maybe, just maybe, the universe let her came back to you. To give you another chance." Sam sighed.

"I..." Steve was about to speak but Sam cut him off. "You said it yourself Steve, you love her so you better think about it carefully." Sam said as he pat Steve's back.

"Thanks Sam." Steve smiled faintly.

"Don't mention it." Sam smiled back. "I will support whatever you choice is, but be sure you think about it carefully." Sam added and Steve nodded.

As Sam leaves the dining room leaving Steve alone, Steve was lost in his on mind wondering about everything that Sam said. Of course what Sam said is surely right, so Steve is now back doubting his decision.

Steve only hope for Natasha's happiness more than anything else, but now he has to choose to be by her side as a friend or someone who loved her dearly.

Is it true what Sam said? About the possibility of pushing away Natasha's thoughts of being unworthy by loving her? Will he be able to cure her scars and made her became the happiest woman in the world?

A lot of thoughts crossed Steve mind.