And here you were again. Sitting on the couch in the living room you shared with your boyfriend. Actually, you share the whole apartment, but lately, it felt like it was only you living in it. Alone.
Your boyfriend Sunghoon has been... distant lately. I'm working till late at night and going to work early before you wake up. He has never been like this, and it was scaring you. You wanted to understand it, thinking that he was busy with comebacks and a lot of hard work the company has been giving him and his members but, whenever it was like that he always made sure to text you or leave a note but now... nothing. Nothing at all. No 'good morning' nor 'good night' text, no notes. It made you sad.
It was currently late at night, 1AM and Sunghoon have still not returned. You didn't wanna think of the worst, but it was hard not to. You were worried for your boyfriend and his health, and for the sake of your relationship, you wanted to talk to him.
After a while more of waiting, he finally came home. You heard his bag hit the floor as he sighed and walked into the dark living room, the big lamp only on. You jumped up from the couch and slowly approached your boyfriend. He doesn't look tired. You thought to yourself as you finally stood before him. His eyes traveled to yours for a second before looking away. He tried to walk past you, but you held him by his forearm.
"Let go." he pushed your hand away as you looked at him in shock. "WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?" You suddenly raised your voice, leaving Sunghoon looking back at you with an arched eyebrow. "Let it go, Y/n, I'm not in the mood." he says. "I don't care. Not anymore. You leave early in the morning and come home so fucking late at night and you want me to let it go? I haven't seen you for so long." You stopped as you looked at him with sad eyes."I haven't kissed you or hugged you and it hurts me. What is it Hoon? Are you tired of me? Did you fall out of love? Tell me, please just don't do this to me." Tears had escaped your eyes long ago. He was standing still, not moving a bit, avoiding your eyes.
He felt guilty. So guilty but he had to tell u the truth because he really was hurting you lots. He sighed as he got the courage to look at you finally. Your teary eyes staring at him, it hurt him. The guilt was eating him up and he knew he went a little too far keeping this secrete away from you.
"Sit down." he says, voice a whisper but enough for Y/n to hear him. You sit down, wiping the tears from your cheeks and eyes. He sat down next to you, his gaze on his lap now. "I'm so sorry Y/n. For what I'm gonna say and how much I've hurt you... and how much I'm gonna hurt you but I can't keep this in me anymore."
Y/n was scared. Not just scared but she felt so many emotions and feelings that she coilft explain. What is he gonna tell her?
"I fell out of love Y/n..." he slowly says. Words coming our of his mouth were like daggers to her heart. As if he could hear her heart shattering he looked up at her with guilt eyes, looking into her broken ones that still held so much love for him.
Tears were streaming down her face as she sat still. She closed her eyes, breathing in, processing what he just said. All the things she's lost for him to only end like this. Sleepless nights of staying up late to hear him enter the house safe, the food she cooked for him everyday and night to only see it in the fridge whole, the small gifts you'd buy him and secretly leave them for him to find, hoping it'll bring a smile to his face and make his day better and the love you gave to him. You gave him all and everything but the most important thing you've lost on him was your love. These last few months you gave it all, trying to save the relationship to only find out he wasn't giving that love back, he just took it and threw it away.
All the things I've lost on you, oh.
Tell me are they lost on you? Oh
It hurt. It hurt for the both of you but mostly you. Opening your eyes again, you looked at him before smiling. "It's okay." Your small voice spoke up. He looked at you confused but you just smiled more. "It's not your fault. I'm sorry I couldn't make you happy. I'm sorry I'm not the one." Now your words were cutting him deep. He fucked up. Big time.
You stood up and walked to your once shared bedroom and you slowly packed your things. Folding his shirts in your closet and leaving them on the bed, you finally came out. Sunghoon was still sitting on the couch, his head between his hands. Hearing your steps he looked up and stood up.
You approached him and hugged him softly, catching him off guard but he hugged back, now his tears escaping from his beautiful eyes. "Thank you for everything Sunghoon. I will cherish all the moments and love I had with you. Have a good life, Hoonie." You smiled up at him once again. That nickname was his absolute favorite, and now he knows he won't be hearing it for a long time.
Stepping back and getting a hold of your suitcase, you finally exited the apartment, closing the door soflty as tears came back on your face. Back to my lonely apartment. It was gonna be hard to move on, but you had to. It's gonna be a long time and work to get back the love you've lost, but you will make it.
After everything I've lost on you.
Is it lost on you?
