Lighting a Match in the Rain

Chapter Forty

My heart grieved. It throbbed like an open wound, struggling to mend.

I didn't sleep. I thought that at one point, I'd cry all the tears in me until I finally fell asleep but that time never came.

Sage had started to feel like home. His arms had given me comfort. I'd started to feel love within his laugh. And now, I didn't know how I was supposed to go to school and focus on passing tests when I was scared of passing him within the school's halls.

Two knocks sounded softly on my bedroom door, and after I didn't speak up, it opened slowly until Macey's head peaked through the crack.

I'd managed to get out of bed, wash my face and brush my teeth, but had ended up burying my bottom back in my sheets. If I was getting forced to go take these tests in order to finish senior year then it was going to happen in the same sweat pants and hoodie I slept in.

My little sister climbed into my bed beside me and leaned her head on my shoulder. "Unfortunately, it gets worse before it gets better," she reminded me in a whisper.

I'd told her the same words once, yet I couldn't comprehend how heartbreak could feel worse than it felt right then.

I forced the corners of my lips up, though it only lasted a second, and wrapped my arms around her, letting myself sink into her comforting arms for once. "When did you get so wise?"

Her chest rose and fell against my own. "When my sister taught me from her mistakes so I didn't have to learn the hard way."

At least I'd been doing something right.

#

I walked up to the table I usually ate lunch at and found not only Kinsley and Julian there but also Malorie who was sitting in my usual seat. Sitting down in front of Julian, I listened to the girls' words, trying to figure out what they were in the middle of discussing.

Malorie was open-mouthed, smiling, and looking entertained by whatever Kinsley was going on and on about, her lips as bright red as her hair. "You did what?" She asked my best friend rhetorically, squealing.

"Yes!"

"Oh my gosh."

"What'd you do?" I asked, but neither of them had even bothered to notice my presence had joined them.

"I know," Kinsley gushed to Malorie.

"What did you do?" I asked again, louder this time.

Both of their heads finally turned in my direction. They briefly glanced at each other, both of their smiles dying almost instantly.

"Oh, Carlos just met my family last night," Kinsley said like it wasn't a big deal and wasn't worth mentioning.

I tried to hide my surprise. "Carlos?" I nearly chuckled at the mention of the boy in our grade who I thought neither of us had talked to since freshman year. "I didn't even know you two were friends."

Her shoulders shrugged. I noticed how she was avoiding looking directly into my eyes. "You haven't been around much lately," she reminded me.

I tried not to show the effects of my aching chest. "Well, I can be now," I assured her.

Her shoulders just bobbed again. "Sure," she mentioned, slipping out a fake smile. I wasn't stupid. I could tell she wasn't excited about the matter.