Lighting a Match in the Rain

Chapter Twenty-One

Standing in the hall, just outside of Mrs. Lane's room, I pretended to just glance up and down the hall, people watching and wasting time, but deep down I knew I was looking for a specific Brewer twin.

Just as I was about to take a step forward to class, a body stepped in front of me. The same body that seemed to do a lot of random, frequent appearances lately. "Sebastian," I greeted, trying to send him a kind smile, but only half succeeding. I was getting tired of seeing his face every day and having to hold a conversation, but I couldn't help but admit I liked the attention of a guy. Who doesn't? It's a confidence booster, no matter who it is. It's just the fact of knowing a guy is actually interested in you.

"Hey," he spoke softly. There was hesitation in his eyes that made me curious. It also made guilt run through my veins when I thought about our last conversation. "Listen, about yesterday—."

"I'm sorry," I interrupted him with a sigh. "I really am. I was anxious about everything going on and let all my emotions out on you. I understand you were just trying to check on me. And I know you are trying to do better. You are doing better. There's just a lot going on in my head right now." It was still awkward to keep eye contact with him, so I didn't hold it for very long at a time.

Relief swam in his eyes and his shoulders dropped without the stiff tension they had held a moment before. "I'm sorry, too. I know my presence is probably a lot to handle after everything...but I'm a different guy now. I really feel like a different guy than I was." There was truth in his stare. Sincerity. "I'm on medication for my anger now. It helps me relax. And I've been in some anger management therapy...they say I've improved a lot, just over this past month."

I didn't try to stop the smile that stretched my cheeks. "Really?"

He nodded. "Even Nelly told me she's seen a difference in me recently." His sister. She was the most honest person I knew, other than Kinsley and Macey.

Pushing myself up on my tiptoes, I wrapped my arms around his neck and hugged him. His movements were hesitant at first, but after a moment, his arms wrapped around my waist and held me. I felt his face in my hair, likely inhaling my shampoo scent like he used to. "I'm so proud of you," I told him, honestly. "I'm so beyond proud of you."

His grip on me tightened ever so slightly before he pulled away. Softness outlined his bright blue eyes and he reached up and trailed his fingers down the side of my face before letting his arm drop. "That means the most, coming from you."

"I hope you keep it up."

Sebastian started nodding immediately. "I am. I will. Because I have a goal and there's nothing I want more than to achieve it." By that look in his eyes, I had a feeling that the end goal had something to do with me. I tried not to think about it.

"Friends?" I offered. If he was going to keep this up, I wanted to be close enough around him to be able to see it.

His smile brightened as if I had just made his whole week by saying that one word. "Friends," he agreed. I nodded once and turned around to head to class. "El?" he stopped me.

Turning back, I waited for him to continue. "Yeah?"

"You do know that anything I ever did, was never your fault right?" he asked, making me shift my weight in discomfort at the reference he was making. "It was all me. My own head. All of those mistakes stemmed from my own anxiety. It was never because of anything you ever did."

Taking a deep breath, I nodded. "I know."

With one more nod, Sebastian turned around and walked away. By the time, I did the same, Reed was the one now standing in my way to class. The five-minute warning bell rang through my ears.