Dancing Confidence (A Jesy Nelson Fanfic)

Chapter Eleven

I fumbled with my earphones. Even with the loud bass hurting my eardrum I could hear my Dads shouts. “… I don’t remember raising a thief. How… Jonathan I want you to leave this house immediately.” A gasp escaped my parted lips.

The wall in front of me lost my interest and I was fast on my feet to jump down the stairs. Not being able to imagine what it would feel like to live without Johnny. Yes he did do some serious stupid things, but doesn’t everyone do that once in their life time? Feeling the beat of my heart in my stomach with my fast going breath, I knew my face was flushed by now. I was surprised that my parents haven’t spotted me sitting on the stairs yet.

“John, you can not throw your son out of the house!” My mothers’ face was painted with hot tears running down her cheeks. She was trying to hold herself together, not doing the best job at it but still being able to get a hold on the arm of my father. He was a furious figure, built himself in front of my criminal brother up and looked at him with a straight face. It seemed as he had a mask on. But in his eyes something was glistering. Sadness.

I remember the day my brother got in trouble the first time. My dad was made out of rage that day and the week after it, he was being ice-cold to everyone around him. The problem with my father is that he can’t control his feelings well, and he lets everyone feel what only a certain one – my brother – was supposed to feel. He hit him, if I recall right. Johnny had to ask Jade to cover his blue bruise up. He joked about it as I sat on my sisters’ bed and watched both of them, my sisters caring face and her shaking hands. She was really worried she would hurt him and her tensed face showed him that. So he made her jump and smear more of the make-up in his hair than the sensitive spot.

“Look Jazz, Jade’s gonna poop herself.” Then he tickled her sides. Not only made it laugh him, seeing Jade jumping, but also earned a laugh from me. I don’t feel anything besides happiness when I think back to that memory. He sitting on a white chair, in a room with red walls and covered in posters from different bands, it was a funny scene back then. But now it seems as it will come back.

“John, don’t.” The female voice wasn’t filled with sadness over her oldest son getting thrown out of the house, but with a demanding order for her husband. The three of them stood in the kitchen and were loud enough to be heard by our neighbours. Who probably were pressing their curious ears against the wall, making sure not to miss a bit of the conversation taking place on the other side.

The knuckles of my mother’s right hand, the ones which were wrapped around my father’s wrist, were turning white. The tension was breath taking, making it hard for me to understand how Johnny had his usual smug smile playing on his lips. Like it was just some sort of talk he had every day. Which worried me, because it may be like it. It could be that my dad often talked to him about it or in that certain way. In a way that scared me, not only his voice but also the way he looked at him.

I was able to get a good look at the scene as they stood sideways to me.  As my father’s hand moved further up in the air, my mother slowly lost her grip around his wrist. Which made me jump up and run over to them. It was happening so slow, I saw every motion everyone did. My mother’s lips parted, letting out a high-pitched scream as she realized what my father was about to do. Johnny just stood there, like a statue made out of stone, though his eyes getting bigger as the realization hit him. His father was going to slap him. Said man was only showing his rage, his eyes were wild and black, not showing any other emotion. His body was shaking and tensing up with each passing second. The mask he was wearing was now showing how my brothers’ action made him feel, a deep corrugation that always showed up when he was angry got visible. I can’t remember correctly, but I was sure it was a wrinkle not a deep one. That only showed how much I missed what happened between the males.