Divine Intervention: Thanksgiving

Chapter 7: Space

I needed to go somewhere I could clear my head and find perspective. I ended up where I always do, on Michelle's doorstep. 

She answered the door laughing. Her smile quickly fell when she saw I was alone and upset. She pulled me in out of the rain and wrapped her arms around me. "Let's get you warm and dry and find out what has you in such a state."

I just sniffed and nodded as I was completely unable to stop my tears. She took my coat and I took off my shoes. She guided me into the kitchen and sat me down at the table with a box of tissues. She busied herself with the tea kettle and gave me some space. I blew my nose and just stared at my phone. The kettle whistled and before I knew it there was a mug of steaming water in front of me with a peppermint tea bag and her bear shaped bottle of honey. I fixed my tea quietly and held the mug tightly in my hands for comfort. She sat across from me with her own mug in her hands and looked at me knowingly. I knew she was waiting for me to speak, but I didn't know where to start. I sipped my tea and stared into my mug.

Michelle cleared her throat. "I'm going to need you to tell me why I'm going over there to kick his ass." There was no amusement in her voice.

"I don't know, maybe I'm being ridiculous." I sighed and shook my head. Now that we didn't occupy the same place, my reaction seemed silly. I took a sip of my tea and sat the mug down so I had my hands to talk with. I told her the whole story and waited for the advice I so desperately needed.

She didn’t say anything for awhile. She reached for my hand across the table and held it.  “You are not silly, but you might be overreacting a bit.”  She smiled softly. “He wasn’t thinking and I am sure he didn’t mean it the way it sounded.”

I thought for a minute in the pause she gave me. “But why would he say it at all? Family means so much to both of us.” I buried my head in my arms on the table.

I heard her chair scrape across the floor before I felt her hands on my shoulders. “This is a brand new experience for both of you. The transition between what was, what is now, and what will be, is not going to be easy for you two to navigate. If it’s not easy for the two in the relationship, it’s going to be even harder for anyone on the outside to understand.”

I just started crying again. On one hand I was happier than I had ever been, but on the other I hadn’t asked for any of this. I wasn’t looking for anyone. Was I far enough past the trauma to be entering into all of this? Was I just doubting it because of how I thought everyone else would feel about this? Shouldn’t I trust my feelings? I relayed all of this to Michelle and tried to get a hold of myself.

She sighed, moving back to her chair. “These are questions I don’t have the answers for. You are going to have to go home and talk to him. Not yell at him, but actually talk to him about this and listen to his feelings too.” She glanced at her phone and showed me the screen.  “He’s looking for you and I am going to tell him that you are with me. He doesn’t need to be worried about your whereabouts.  Remember he has nowhere else to go.”

I nodded, blew my nose, and sipped at my tea again. “You’re right. You are always right.” She was and sometimes I just needed someone to tell me the obvious things that I wasn’t seeing. The situation was not easy, but it wasn’t impossible. Like all things it just needed work. We needed to be on the same page and we needed to communicate. I couldn’t just assume that he knew how I was feeling.  I couldn’t assume I knew how he was feeling either. 

She laughed and sat back in her chair. “Not always, but I do what I can.” She picked up her phone and sent a message. I assumed it was to Avi. “Should I tell him that you will be home soon?”

I sighed and finished my tea. “Yeah. Do you think he’ll understand why I left?”

“I am positive he will. You both were silly if you thought you would get through this transition without any bumps. If I don’t hear from you again before tomorrow, I will assume you kissed and made up.” She winked at me and took my mug to the sink. “Now scoot and do what you need to do.”

I got up and hugged her tight. “I’m going. Thank you. I love you.”

“I love you too, sis.” She held me for a minute. “It’s all going to work out, I promise. Besides, the best part of fighting is making up.” There was that wink again.

I was nervous about this talk, but I knew she was probably right. I gathered my things and headed home. Making up would be fun. I prayed we would get there.