Josie's Journey

Josie Does All The Medical Things

It had been a month and a half, and the babies were home now.

Josie was hiding in her room, the sound of babies crying made her hallucinate. she felt herself completely switch to Alice. The crying is annoying. They cry more than i do, it's fucking annoying.

The body got up and went to Veronica's room and stared at the door before opening it and stepping inside. Josie heard the shower running and music playing. Josie picked up the girl that was crying, gently rocking her in her arms. She sat down on the rocking chair. The creaking of the chair is heard as she rocked it back and forth, the newborn calming down. Naomi was seven pounds and eight ounces so she was doing pretty well.

When Josie saw Nicklaus sleeping, grateful he was sleeping. She hated that he was mostly deaf. She would have to learn American Sign Language. It was frustrating the last time she tried to learn it. She watched him as he slept and breathed with the oxygen. He only needed it when he was asleep. Josie was grateful he was alive. She helped a lot with taking care of them when Veronica was busy.

— — —

Josie was having her GJ tube replaced, it was broken and she hadn't ran her feeds in days. She was weak and exhausted. Elaine had noticed something was wrong a few days prior when Josie was beginning to turn a pale color. Other than her beanie, she was pale.

"Josie, what's going on and why haven't you been running your nutrition?" Elaine asked.

"I think my tube is broken. It's just hanging there and it's not in place." She struggled to handle the thoughts of going back to the hospital. The memories and trauma she went through from her hospital stays. She was scared to have to get it replaced but she realized it had to be done eventually.

Elaine took a deep breath. "I'll call the GI doctor and let the hospital know. Just relax." She said to her. She patted her shoulder gently. "Maybe he can write an order for some fluids." She tried to make her feel at ease. She knew it would help but she did not know how stingy she was.

Josie just nodded, zoning out a bit because of the stress she had. Everything was falling into place but it felt like it was falling apart. She was dissociative and felt pretty weak.

Elaine grasped her daughter before she collapsed to the ground. She sighed and sat down while holding her and running a hand through Josie's hair. She held onto her until Josie's body began to move. "Hey... it's okay." She said as she saw Josie panicking.

Josie started to hyperventilate until she calmed down by Elaine's voice. She looked at Elaine. "How long?" She asked.

"A few seconds." Elaine said as she sat up. "Are you okay to stand or sit up?" She asked.

Josie took a minute to breathe and slowly sat up, grasping onto someone's arm. It was Veronica. "Are you okay, Josie?" She asked her.

"Yeah, I'm good. It happens sometimes." Josie said as she was careful not to move too suddenly.

"Okay, just be careful." She said.

"I know, I will." Josie said as she sat down on the couch, turning the television on, and waiting for it to come on.

— — —

Elaine had received a phone call that they could place the new tube that day. She was shocked. "Okay, thank you doctor. I will let her know." She ended the call and looked for Josie. She found her in the kitchen, making Jaimie a PB&J sandwich.

Josie wished she could eat them, but knew she would just make herself sick.

"They can get you in today at two p.m. so I need you to be ready by noon. It's a bit of a long drive." Elaine told her.