Chapter 15~ Cut Short

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TW~ Self Harm.
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It's been four days. Four days without a phone call. It wasn't their fault the doctors here wouldn't allow you any contact, I guess only when you're on the brink of death that it's okay to have a little chat.

It's been four days of pretending you were okay, so you could get out sooner and attempt at convincing the staff that yeah I'm fine! Just peachy! Why wouldn't I be?

But there was no fooling Dr. Staple. That woman read you like a book. One look at you and she knew you weren't fine. Although she failed to ask you for sure.

You wouldn't eat for three of the four, Staple had to personally feed you as you fought the nurses that tried themselves. The only person who could help you was Dr. Staple. She was a safe woman, she made you feel like you weren't in a hospital at all. She kept you company during the hard nights. And made sure that you understood you are not a burden. You found yourself sort of "attached" to her in a way. Just until you could go home that is.

"Y/N," You now were sitting in her office. Dr. Staple had called you in here without specifying her reasoning. "I'm sending you home early." Her tone was gentle yet firm as she skimmed through your file one last time. "It's been four. Not five." You managed a whisper while staring down at the floor. " I've talked with your doctor that being held up in here isn't helping your mental health. Meaning, I'm cutting your time here short."

Her eyes peeled off the small stack of papers to you. You didn't notice her standing up from her desk and sitting next to you. She put her hand on top of yours distracting you from the fidgeting of your thumbs. "I believe in surrounding yourself with people you trust." Finally having the courage to look the older woman in the eye she greeted you with a smile. "Let's get you home Y/N. They can help you." Sounds like something that would come straight from Cordelia's mouth.
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It wasn't even an hour later when Misty burst through the doors of the hospital asking for your name. The receptionist pointed to her left, and there you were sitting there in the waiting room with Ellie waiting to be taken away. Dr. Staple noticed the blonde walking towards you, the older woman's movements caught your attention, then you realized Misty was standing there with a soft expression.

The blonde pulled you into a warm hug putting her hand on the back of your head ever so softly. "We missed you." She whispered. Your eyes soon became glassy. Ellie went over with Misty how you'd been doing and to pay close attention to your actions. The blonde nodded along. She turned around realizing you were already walking to the car. Misty was shortly behind you, but Dr. Staple tapped her on the shoulder. "Here's my number. Call me if you find her in a rough spot." The red head handed Misty a piece of paper with her personal cell on it. "Thank you." She gave a smile and a nod to Ellie before she ran, catching up to you.
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The car pulled up to the gates of the Academy. The nerves inside were bouncing off the walls. Your hands started to shake. What would the girls think of you? You had completely forgotten that you were the new supreme, how could someone with such responsibility have the audacity to pull an act like this? It's not like you did it for attention or the faint of heart. You just wanted to see her again,

she was Unreachable. She was right there; so close yet so far.

Misty helped you out of the car. She was unsure of how fragile you were at these times, so her tender care didnt fade one bit. "We all love you Y/N, no matter the circumstance." Your grip on her hand was tighter, she could see the need for reassurance. You were grateful for her gesture.

Misty opened the front door. You two were met with all the girls including Myrtle, standing there with open arms and kind hearts. Even Madison who wasnt one to show much kindness towards anyone, but you always knew it was in there somewhere.

Their eyes asked so desperately to hug you, so when you gave them the okay with a slight nod of the head and a small smile of the mouth they all crowded around you just enough to not feel overwhelming.

"Thank you all, really. I feel much better."

Lies.

You insisted on having some alone time which of course everyone was fine with. Except Misty. She felt a need to keep an eye on you. Maybe it was Cordelias dying last words to her were
"Keep her safe for me." Or maybe it was the past weeks events. Maybe both. Whatever it was there was no way she was going to let you slip away again.


You went straight to the bathroom. The last time you were in here, the energy still lingered. The feeling of betrayal, failure. Were you a coward for doing it? You had pondered on that question for the past four days. You regretted everything. This isnt how normal people mourn. Nobody else would have been on Suicide Watch for four of the six days their loved one was gone. Except she wasnt just a loved one she was something more, doesnt sound possible but it was.

Found yourself crying in the same spot as last time. Only this time you hoped you wouldn't end back up at square one.

I know you can hear me.

Her voice came through once again. You hadn't heard it since you were admitted.

It's going to be hard I know. But I dont break promises y/n. I will always be here.

Your hands now covering your ears praying that for just this once she would go away. You crawled around scouring the drawers for some kind of release. Of course the girls didnt take the razors, you had done it with a bottle of pills. Not a blade. You knew when they cleaned out the cabinets they'd move the medicine elsewhere. You had planned it all out.

"Delia please, just this once. Dont be here." Your soft sobs echoed in the bathroom. Apparently not enough to trigger a warning to the blonde behind the bedroom door.

You held the razor to your arm.

Don't. Please y/n.

"I dont want you"

Cut.

"To see"

Cut.

"My failures"

Cut.

Then your louder cried arose attention. Misty heard you this time. Your unknowing guardian angel sent from above, bursted through the door helping you to your aid. She knew to always trust her gut. Cordelia taught her that. You cried into your hands with blood dripping from the arm until Misty brought you closer into her chest while wrapping a damp towel around your wounds. "Its going to be alright. Shh." Once again, you could only imagine Cordelias voice. Maybe it was maybe it wasnt.

You cried yourself into a sleep on Misty's lap. She brought you to the bed covering you up with the blanket on the chair in the corner. She considered calling Dr.Staple but the idea of sending you back to the hospital was out of the question. So Misty went to the only person she thought could help.

"Myrtle?" She knocked on the doorframe of the library. "Yes dear?" The blonde sat on the couch next to the frizzy haired woman. "Y/N needs more help then I thought and we dont have another option." The red head put her book down, full attention on Misty. "What do you mean. She said she was okay." Myrtle now understood that it was all an act with you. She picked her book back up flipping through the pages...

"There is something we can do."

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A/N~
>:)
I have an idea but I'm not giving it away. might end seasonal depression

Until next time luvs~

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