Growing Up and Other Tall Tales

Chapter 92

Music floods the room, and people are shouting and cheering. I am not sure if I'm imagining the confetti. Even Valentine is ecstatic with celebration, seemingly having forgotten that he'd rooted against us the entire time. Something slots onto my head, which I deduce must be a plastic crown when I see Cindy throwing one on Lyra's head as well. Lyra's grey eyes are big, and she won't stop looking at me. And me, I can't look at her. If I did, I would probably kiss her again.

"Here it is, the extent of our budget spending!" Valentine cheers, indicating the crowns on our heads.

Someone shoves a cup at me, and I move a hand from its spot, splayed on Lyra's back, to take it. Everything feels oddly dreamlike. I, for once, don't want a drink right now. At a loss, I offer it to Lyra.

"I'm good," I hear her say. Her expression is unreadable.

Okay, so maybe I could do with one.

I swallow the shot.

Or two. Or alcohol poisoning.

"Capo!" Duke calls, excited and beckoning me over. "Capo! C'mere!"

I reluctantly move away from Lyra to shift towards Duke, but we don't separate completely; Lyra and I untangle slowly, arms touching until just our hands are linked, fingers wrapped around each other's so we're holding hands.

But the welcome pressure of Lyra's hand leaves me after a minute, and when I turn around to see what happened, Lyra is gone. Dissolved into the crowds already riding out the high of the competition.

I try looking for Kathy but find that she had left early with Prince and so had Diana and Hye-Rin.

"Hey," I asks Cindy, who's standing nearby, "Have you seen Lyra?"

Cindy hasn't. Neither have Missy or Nick. I pull off my crown and start to go searching for her.

I zero on Lyra, of all places, standing outside in the cold. She's almost hidden away in the building's shadow, wrapped up in her coat and scarf huddled in on herself. I throw on my own coat to go outside too, closing the sliding door quietly behind me. Almost immediately the sounds are gone. And it's so, so quiet.

"Hey," I say. The steam from my breath creates a little cloud in front of my face. "What happened to your crown?"

Lyra reveals the crown, clasped in one of her hands.

I didn't want to stand in front of her, make her feel cornered so I wait until she turns around to look at me.

She doesn't.

"Lyra?" I ask softly.

"Why aren't we together?"

I nearly do a double take. "What?"

"Why aren't we together? Like a couple?" Lyra repeats turning around. Now I can hear the slight stuffiness in her voice. "Why not?"

"Is—is that a real question?" I ask laughing a little. It's almost like a joke, but not funny at all. "Because..."

Lyra just stares at me.

"Because we're just friends, Lyra," I conclude. And this is the first time I called us that in a serious voice; and it's not even genuine. I can hear my own question mark.

"That's it?" Lyra asks. I don't think I can get used to her voice like this, soft, breathy and hushed. Lyra Donovan is never quieted. It just doesn't happen. "Just friends? Like that was just kissing?"

"I," I don't really understand what's going on right now. I'm so confused, and I feel strangely emotional out of nowhere and perhaps it has something to do with how I can see tear tracks down Lyra's face. Why are you crying? "I don't know."