Frozen Tears

Chapter Twenty-Nine

There's a long pause of silence while the unquestionable trace of uncertainty hangs in the air between us. Jay looks at me with eyes that hold an emotion that I don't understand, before letting out a heavy sigh that makes me completely awake with awareness. 

"I know." He declares, an almost tired look on his face. 

-You knew?" I take a step towards him, feeling the hurt swarming deep inside of me, anger dancing like a flame in my eyes. "And you didn't care to tell me?" My voice comes out cold, controlled, barely contained compared to the betrayal that I feel. He looks at me with what looks like exasperation, as if I were a small stubborn child refusing to see sense. 

"Well, I'm sorry if I was too preoccupied writing my suicide letter after you rejected me. Twice!" He snarls, immediately cutting all contempt I held for him moments before, down. I'm shocked, lost for words, now slowly being filled by immense guilt. 

There's a deep and painful silence through which the culpability continues to suffocate me. His words sting but I know that they're true. It was my own fault. I was too focused on myself and my own contempt for my parents that I stupidly stopped acknowledging my unquestionable part in Jay's near death. My own soulmate's death. I haven't paid much attention to his feelings, and how much he must have hurt after my second rejection. 

I watch with sad eyes as he tries to recompose himself, starring at me with an unreadable expression. Finally, after time that seems to stretch out into eternity, his features soften, making him seem more like an angel than anything else. I want to slap him for focusing back on me and my problems instead of letting me acknowledge his hardship during my rejection. 

"But that's not why I came." He says again after some time of us just measuring each other up with our eyes. "I want us to get to know each other better."

-Huh?

-You heard me. God this sounds so cliché doesn't it..." He mutters lowly to himself, and I'm restraining myself so bad to go pinch that cute little dimpled cheek as he begins to look more and more uncomfortable as the seconds tick by, "Okay that was weird, forget I even said that." 

I watch with amusement as he struggles for words, all trace of anger or hurt evaporated into thin air from my and his side. "Jay?" I prod, eyes twinkling at him. 

"Do you want - do you want to..." He still can't find the courage to say those very simple words, so I decide to put him out of his misery.

 I'm such a humble person. 

"Go on a date?" I finish for him with amusement and a tilted head, noticing his infinite struggle. The poor vampire has obviously never tried this before. He sends me an almost nervous glance that melts my heart.

He's so freaking adorable... 

"I thought you vampires were too old-fashioned for that kind of stuff." I raise an eyebrow and he huffs, sending me that annoying hot smirk. Gosh he's way out of my league.

-So do you want to? We could go out somewhere..." At the mention of going out my eyes light up and I start nodding my head like a freak. "Yes, wait - is that a no? No! Yes, -No, it's a yes right?" He looks completely confused as I jump up and down, sudden excitement swimming through me.

"It's a yes! It's a big fat YES!" I squeal and run out of the room, leaving him starring after me with disbelief. 

"We're going somewhere fancy!" I hear him yell, but that doesn't stop my heart from hammering wildly in my chest with excitement. 

...°...

After opening a few doors and tripping various times, I finally make it to Alice's and Chase's one room. A big double bed is displayed proudly in golden and silver silk in the middle of the lightly furnished bedroom, and the actual furniture is constituted of a white wardrobe, a white vanity, a white desk and a crystal clear bathroom that's attached to the room by a glass door. Definitely my sister's interior touch.