Eska ~ The Forgotten Gilbert

1a. First day back

Elena's POV

'Dear Diary: Today will be different. It has to be. I will smile and it will be believable. That smile will say, "I'm fine, thank you." "Yes, I feel much better." I will no longer be the sad little girl who lost her parents. I will start fresh, be someone new. It's the only way I'll make it through.'

I finished my diary entry and put down my pen, smiling to myself. Should anyone read my diary, they'll know what a strong person I am, and how brave I'm being for my family. I mean, of course I'm sad about my parents dying, but it's also a good opportunity for people to talk about me and about how strong and brave I am, right?

I headed downstairs to get some coffee and found Jenna scrambling around the kitchen, trying to make sense of school mornings with three kids.

"Toast, I can make toast!" she announced, her hands flapping as she tried to get a grasp of things.

"It's all about the coffee, Aunt Jenna," I said, pouring some into my favourite mug and relishing it's warmth in my hands.

"Your first day of school and I'm totally unprepared." Jenna looked sad whilst putting her own things into her handbag.

Jeremy swooped in and grabbed the coffee out of my hands that I'd been cradling, and I glared at him. Who does he think he is? Little druggie...

I almost completely missed Eska, sat in the corner holding her school bag, her hair in those stupid plaits. She was holding a mug of coffee that I went to take from her hands after Jeremy had taken mine. It's survival of the fittest in this house, and let me tell you, Eska would be the first to go.

"Lunch money?" Jenna held some notes out to each of us in turn. Eska and I politely declined whilst Jeremy took his share. I wonder where that will go... "Anything else? A number 2 pencil? What am I missing?"

"Don't you have a big presentation today?" piped up Eska, her voice barely audible above the flurry of activity coming from Jenna.

"I'm meeting with my thesis advisor at... Now. Crap!" Jenna shook her hair out and grabbed her bag, sparing us a worried glance.

"Then go! We'll be fine!" I assured her. She smiled at me and left quickly, grabbing her keys on the way out.

I turned to Jeremy. His drug issue was becoming a bigger problem - I already had the rep of having Eska, the silent twin, but having a drug addict brother was also not ideal. I decided to go with the 'caring sister' act. "You okay?" I asked, feigning interest in his welfare.

He rolled his eyes at me - rude git! "Don't start" he said shortly, before walking out of the room, presumably to get the bus to school.

I looked over at my sister who sat silently watching this unfold. "Aren't you going to do anything about him?" I glared at her. He wasn't just my responsibility after all.

"He's hurting, Elena," she said. "It's the only way he knows how to deal with the accident."

"Well they were my parents too, but you don't see me resorting to drugs!" I retorted, putting my hands on my hips.

"Everyone copes differently," she said, shrugging. Stupid girl. She's so non-committal.

"Eurgh, fine. Bonnie is taking me school, gotta go."

"Oh, could I have a ride?"

I totally ignored her. I didn't want her tagging along with Bonnie and I. Besides, it wasn't that far to walk to school, and if she set off now, she wouldn't be late. I left the house, slamming the door behind me.