Lykan Girl

Chapter Eleven

The last thing I wanted to do was break off our relationship, but I couldn't be with him without feeling like I was doing something wrong now. Which made me laugh because a week ago, I wouldn't have felt this way. A week ago, I felt nothing but happiness. Guilt was something didn’t even come into play. But now it was impossible to feel carefree. Now I felt loyal to my pack. I couldn't be loyal to my heart and my pack at the same time. I had to break it off even…even if it meant shattering my heart into a millions pieces.

I loved him with all my heart. Every breath I now took was for him. I needed him, wanted him, but that was impracticable. I was being selfish. It seemed that our love wasn't meant to be. And that was why I had to let him go. I had to do it before my heart completely and irrevocably belonged to him. I had to stop it. If I spent one day, one hour, even one minute more with him it would be completely unbearable to let him go.

I needed to do it to protect us both and the people around us. I would have gone on in ignorant bliss if it wasn't for the profligate battle that had occurred, but it was unjust to believe that we could go on with this secret relationship.

Now that Aliesha knew. I was jeopardizing her safety as well. I could make things difficult for her. It would be horrible if anything happened to her or her status as a queen’s guard. I was afraid to know what would happen if Koretta found out. It would be the perfect chance to take me out of the run to be the next queen. Even though I would happily give her the position if I believed she would do an excellent job. But I was sure she would end up killing everyone with her stupid desire for power.

Usually as I ran through the forest to get to Titan it seemed to take forever. I always wanted to get to him as soon as possible but now as I walked, I wished it would take a lot longer. I wanted to turn around and forget what I'd come to do.

When I finally walked to our place at the clearing he quickly moved towards me. He hoisted me into his arms and squeezed me forcefully. I felt secure in his arms and for a minute, I forgot about everything I had to tell him.

"Oh God, Jayla. I feel so much better now that I actually get to see you in person. When I saw that guy carrying you. I thought something had happened to you. I almost lost my cool and ran up to you to check on you. Kyros had to hold me back."

I wrapped my arms around his neck. I couldn't do it. I loved him too much. I couldn't break up with him. I couldn't even picture a life without him anymore. I had been so ready to break things off with him. I had practiced my whole speech in my head all day but now that I was with him, touching him, my determination was wavering.

"I told you I was all right when we talked on the phone earlier. Like I said my body was weak from all the healing I did." I reminded him.

"Yeah but it wouldn't be the first time you down played something." He said putting me down.

"How’s Samara? She doesn't know anything yet, right?"

"No. She doesn't know anything. Kyros is going into town later on to tell her that she has to stay for a couple of more days. He won't tell her anything until she comes back to the ranch."

"When she gets back can you tell her that I'm okay?" I asked.

He smiled. "You know she'll still worry until you tell her yourself and she can see it for herself. You can come after everyone at the ranch is gone. It'll take a couple of days. I'll text you."

"Titan." I said his name quietly.

He took my hand in his. "What is it, Jay?"

"I have a couple of things to tell you."

He squeezed my fingers. "Go ahead."

I took a deep breath. "I…I killed Elsa. She came after me and I tried to get her to leave me alone but she wouldn't. We fought and she stabbed me twice…I'm okay. I already healed. When I wouldn't die she took out a silver knife. She would have killed me if I didn't kill her." I cried, giant tears falling at my feet.