PRECIPICE [h.s.]

Prologue

How lucky are we to exist in the Sun?

The Sun creates life. The Sun sustains all life on Earth. It gives us the flowers that grow in the fields and the trees that grow above our heads. If the Sun was to disappear one day we would all be dead in a matter of minutes. The cold would probably take us first, but let's say in this magical world we did not die from the Sun's lack of heat, life itself would cease to exist. The plants would die, causing the animals to all die, seemingly wiping out every living thing. Go with me farther here, and say we somehow could sustain life without the heat of the Sun. What would be the purpose of it all?

The Sun rises and the rooster crows, signifying that it is time for the world to begin its day. There are twenty four hours in a day and yet we chose to live our lives in the Sun's rays. When the Sun shines down on us, that is how we know we are truly alive. We feel its warmth on our skin and squint at its brightness. Our days revolve around watching it rise, and praying it takes its time to settle at night. Even in the darkness we look to the moon, whose face we would not even be able to see if it was not for the Sun. The Sun is the reason we were created, the reason will still exist, and the reason we will all one day die.

But -

How lucky was I to be loved by the sun?

I spent time wrapped up in her rays, her comfort. It was as if it shone just for me. Over six billion people in the world and she spent her days making sure I could see. She guided my actions and made me visible. Her brightness conducted my days and nights. Everyone sees the sun during the day, but how fortunate was I to watch her shine at night? While everyone's eyes turned to the moon, I had the sun in the palm of my hands. When everyone watched her slip away under the horizon, she was coming home to me. Was I still the lucky one to have her heat personally burn me? Who am I that got to see the side of the sun that the human eye could not withstand. How am I any better than every other living organism on the planet that revolved around her? I spun around her like everyone else, but it felt as if our centers were aligned. We could spin for eternity and it seemed as though my soul was pulled back to her. The sun gives all it has, and we take all of it until she no longer has any brightness left to shine. I took that away from the world.

-H.

March 2000

Have you ever seen 

anything

in your life

more wonderful

than the way the sun,

every evening,

relaxed and easy,

floats toward the horizon

and into the clouds or the hills,

or the rumpled sea,

and is gone--

and how it slides again

out of the blackness,

every morning,

on the other side of the world,

like a red flower

streaming upward on its heavenly oils,

say, on a morning in early summer,

at its perfect imperial distance--

and have you ever felt for anything

such wild love--

do you think there is anywhere, in any language,

a word billowing enough

for the pleasure

that fills you,

as the sun

reaches out,

as it warms you

as you stand there,

empty-handed--

or have you too

turned from this world--

or have you too

gone crazy

for power,

for things?

(The Sun, Mary Oliver)