CHAPTER 30

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I'm not ready to say goodbye~



We arrived at home almost 11:00am, and Jane felt asleep in the car while I was driving. And I have no choice to carry her bridal style through her room. I was so gentle cause I might wake up her.

The lights on the house were already turned off as maybe they my mom and hers are sleeping now and I'm the only one is awake plus I'm carrying my future wife, just kidding.

I was gently stepping each of the stairs while carrying her. Once I arrived, I opened her door and luckily it's not locked or else she'll be sleeping with me.


I gently layed her on the bed and slowly removing my arms on her back. Before I leave I stated on her for a one time to see her beautiful face. I tried not to cry because she might hear me. Well I'm really not ready to say goodbye... this is the hardest thing in my whole life.


"Don't leave me..." a whisper from her voice that I suddenly heard and I panicked, she moved her head on the left side and put her hands below her face like a pillow.

At first, I was shocked why did she said that for any reasons, but maybe she's just dreaming?

And later on, before I leave I decided to peck her forehead just one more time. "I love you Jane.... I'm signing off as your next door.. later.." I murmurs.


Then I finally left her room and went to my own room which is her next door. I sat on my bed sheet and thinking what to do now? I stood up again and packed my things for preparation in our flight.


And when I'm packing my things I really can't handle the hot tears that keep falling on ground, my hands started to tremble and I took a deep breath and sat again in my bed.



Then I nodded to my piano behind the wall and I stared at it. I came to the piano and sat on the chair, I decided to record a song for her and only her to listen to it.












It called euphoria.. my happiness












I decided to record full version of it even my voice was breaking because many tears were falling again while I sang that song for her..


Every word that I wrote in that song hits me apart, it's too much now, it's so hurts really hurts.


And when I'm finish recording that song, I decided to leave my piano there and I grabbed a small paper and wrote "play here!" And I taped it on the button to play it, and I hope she will notice that and listen the song that I wrote for her.


I left a few things on my room, I even left my dairy for her to free to read it and also my sketch pad to see what I drew.



And I wrote a letter that it's in my desk, I hope she'll read it.











Ready to cry? 🙃

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