When fantasy becomes reality

Chapter 1

The bathroom walls offers little comfort from the chaos beyond its door. My heart thuds against my ribcage, matching the relentless beat of the music vibrating through the walls of the dingy pub. My breath comes in short gasps, echoing the panic swirling inside me.

"Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit..." like a mantra I repeat the words to myself.

I press my clammy palms against the cool porcelain of the sink in front of me, trying to ground myself amidst the whirlwind of emotions threatening to engulf me. How did I end up here? What just happened? The questions ricochet through my mind, each one adding another layer to the suffocating fear tightening its grip around my throat.

I glance at my reflection in the smudged mirror, my own wide grey eyes staring back at me with a mixture of disbelief and dread. The girl in the mirror looks like a stranger, her usually composed facade shattered into a million fractured pieces. As much as I would like to blame the horrible spotlights, my panicked appearance has nothing to do with the lighting in the room. The girl in front of me has a haunted look. Her skin colour has lost almost all colour to an almost sickly grey-pink tone, and the muscles in her jaw are tense. With trembling fingers, I adjust my dishevelled hair and wipe away a stray tear threatening to betray my mask of composure. I can't let anyone see me like this, not now. Not ever.

"Just breathe!" I urge myself while I press my eyes shut.

I take a deep breath and exhale slowly. I breathe in again and repeat it a few times. But my pounding heart won't calm down and the knots in my stomach won't dissolve. A pair of bright amber and oval shaped eyes flash before my eyes. No matter what I do, I can't seem to relax. A sudden knock on the door makes me jump.

"Seriously, what are you doing in there? God damnit, I'm about to pee myself out here!" shouts an angry voice from the other side of the door.

My gaze wanders around the room again. Is it just my imagination or is the room starting to shrink? Considering what I've been through tonight, I'm starting to doubt what's real and what's not. Hopefully, I'm in the middle of a nightmare and will wake up soon. Another angry knock makes me wince again. I feel trapped and sweaty. I must get out of here. Away from everything.

Summoning every ounce of resolve I possess, I push open the door and step back into the pulsating heart of the pub. The air is thick with the scent of sweat and spilled alcohol, the noise of voices and laughter drowning out the frantic rhythm of my heartbeat. I navigate through the mass of bodies, each step a battle against the rising tide of panic threatening to consume me whole. I need to leave, to escape this suffocating atmosphere.

Finally, I burst through the doors and onto the dimly lit street, the cool night air a welcome feeling from the overwhelming atmosphere of the pub. I scan the crowded sidewalk, searching for the familiar glow of taxi lights. I finally notice a cab and I run towards it, frantically knocking on the window. The driver gives me an annoyed look before he turns down the window.

"Are you free?" I ask quickly, a little out of breath.

"Yes, but..." he didn't have time to say anything more before I quickly got into the back seat. He gives me a sceptical look through the rearview mirror.

"Are you okay?" he asks. "You look a little pale, you're not going to throw up in the car are you?"

I laugh nervously and shake my head no. The driver turns his head slightly and eyes me cautiously. He still looks a bit sceptical, and I don't blame him. I really don't! Considering how I looked in the mirror, it's pretty obvious that I'm not feeling my best right now. I swallow hard and try desperately to calm my pounding heart.

"I won't puke" I finally manage to say. At least not because of drunkenness, I think to myself.

"If you do, you will need to pay for thecleaning" he states. "Where do you want to go?"

I nod and give him my address. That's all I manage to say, it's like all thewords are stuck in my throat. Only when the car slowly rolls away do I relax inthe seat. But my brain doesn't, my mind races with unanswered questions andunspoken fears. As I watch the city lights shape into a hazy blur, I can'tshake the feeling that I'm racing towards a future I can't yet comprehend.Either way, one thing is clear: whatever happened tonight has changedeverything.


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