Meredith Something

Reasons why people call me insane :

I think my fridge will have revenge on me by coming to my room, opening my door, staring at me for 3 minutes and then leaving again.

 You know that you're doing something wrong when  no one  hates you. 

I'm not weird, I'm a limited edition.

I'm not crazy, my reality is just different than yours. 

If someone gave you half a brain , then you'd still have only half a brain.

I tried being normal once. Worst 2 minutes of my life.

Some people never go crazy. Must suck.

If you go crazy them make sure you are paid for it, otherwise you'll be locked up.

My brain is like the Bermuda Triangle. When information goes in , it is never found.

Don't break someone's heart,they have only one. Break their bones, they have 206 of them.

Alarm Clocks: So each morning can begin with a heart attack.

The moment when a zombie looking for brains walks right past you.....

When you realise that you still need the keys half a second after the front door closes.

Dear Chocolate commercials, we don't eat chocolate in slow motion with our eyes closed, Sincerely the normal people.

I've always wanted to turn around in a big chair and say,"I've been expecting you. "

Mon: Why is your room so messy? 
Me: So that if someone tries to kill me, they'll trip over something and die.

We have all have that teacher who is like,"Don't pack up yet. There's still 24 seconds of class left..."

Your mom is named mom.......my mom is named mom. Dude, don't freak out, I think we're related.

Dear Math, I'm sick of trying to find your'X'. Just accept the fact that she is gone. Move on, Dude.

I think Voldemort's parents took the game, got your nose way too seriously.

I love how my parents yell at me to get ready when I am the one who is ready and they are not.

I love how in scary movies, the person yells," Hello?" as if the bad guy is gonna be like, " Yeah,I'm in the kitchen! Want a Sandwich ?"

I get suspicious when I see "All of the Above" in a test.



- by me