In which a mysterious newspaper floats around campus written by a person named "Cherry" giving strangely relatable advice, arrogant popular band-member Harry Styles opens his big stupid mouth once, and the shy and self-conscious Dodie is given even more reason to want to disappear altogether━until she comes up with a plan to simultaneously break his heart and get his help in becoming a smoking hot dateable babe (and realising in the process, after trials and tribulations, that she's been one all along) by pretending to be dating each other. What could possibly go wrong?