— 𝗖𝗛𝗔𝗣𝗧𝗘𝗥 𝗙𝗢𝗥𝗧𝗬
( 𝘍𝘈𝘐𝘛𝘏. )
WHEN MURPHY CAUGHT SIGHT OF ALEXANDRIA'S WALLS, she froze. The breathing caught in her chest, and the very air around the four grew as thick as fog. The watchtower was burnt, black, and crumbling. A truck had driven straight through and sat parked in the rubble. She could hear no noise from inside the community, so she assumed the worst. Murphy shared a look with Michonne, who had an unreadable expression upon her face. Michonne wanted a home as much as any of them, and even worse, she had experienced returning to find nothing left before.
Other buildings that lined Alexandria's walls were also burnt. They were as black as coal. No fire started on accident could have done this. This was an attack. Debris littered the ground on which they stepped, pieces of what they called refuge scattered about like leaves from a dying tree. It was painful- the anticipation was enough to drive anyone mad. What was left of the community? As they made their way around the walls, it relieved them to discover no breaches. The gate remained sealed when they approached to enter the place they knew had changed.
Scott leaned heavily upon Heath, his leg still giving him excruciating pain. Murphy supported him on the other side. Michonne led the way, her sword drawn, expecting anything when they entered. The gate screeched as whoever inside slid it open. Murphy felt herself sigh in relief when she saw that it was Maggie, a rifle strapped over her back and a look of great expectation upon her face.
"Thank god," she began, urging them inside. "You guys are safe."
Scott set a hand on Murphy's shoulder once the gate closed behind them, signaling that he was okay to walk alone with Heath.
"Get to the infirmary, I'll meet you there," Murphy assured to the two before turning back to Maggie.
Michonne engulfed Maggie in a hug, which gave Murphy a chance to look around. When she realized what had happened, she raised a hand to her mouth, her eyes immediately beginning to burn. Bodies were strewn all over the street. Puddles of blood surrounded their lifeless corpses. Alexandrians carted the people away, doing their best to eradicate any semblance of what had happened. Murphy gasped when Maggie touched her arm.
"What happened?" Murphy whispered.
Maggie shook her head and pulled her close, "The wolves came. They had w's carved into their foreheads- some sort of cult. We took care of 'em. We lost too many."
When Murphy pulled away, she sniffed and nodded. Horrific incidents such as this began to numb the pain. It was always shocking. Just when you thought humanity could not be more violent and primitive... they never cease to amaze and do so. Murphy left her hands on Maggie's shoulders, not knowing how to break it to her that her husband might not be with them any more. Rosita jogged over to the three.
"Is everyone okay? Murph?" she asked, breathlessly.
"Hey, Rose," Murphy muttered, pulling her into a hug as well. But as they broke apart, her eyes widened as a sudden realization hit her. "The infirmary?"
"They need you," Rosita nodded. "Lots of people were injured, but Denise held down the fort."
Murphy understood, beginning to head there with speed, but Maggie stopped her.
"Wait," she called. Murphy turned around slowly, knowing what was to come. Maggie looked between her and Michonne. "Glenn and the others are comin'... right?"
Murphy and Michonne shared an uneasy look, having dreaded the moment that just arrived. Michonne stepped closer to the could-be widow and began.
"When the horn was going, we ran ahead of the herd. We found a little town and took shelter... but we got trapped. The town was overrun. He split off with Nicholas..." Michonne explained gently.
Maggie shuffled in her spot, her hands nervously wrapping around her body. This couldn't be happening. Not him too.
Murphy stepped in, "He had this idea that if he lit a fire, it would stop the walkers from coming here."
"I tried to go instead," Michonne reasoned. "I wanted to."
"He wouldn't let us," Murphy added. "He... he promised he had to do it for you."
Maggie's gaze was locked upon the ground, an undecipherable expression upon her face. Murphy knew she had lost too much already. Would Maggie ever recover if Glenn didn't come back?
"We had to keep going. I'm sorry," Michonne finished, her voice so soft Maggie strained to hear it. Murphy could hear the heartbreak in every word. "He said if he got stuck, he would find a way to send us a signal."
Maggie looked up from the ground, her eyes flickering between the two, "A signal?"
Murphy began to reply, ready to say so much more. She couldn't imagine what Maggie was thinking in that moment. But distant screaming caught everyone's attention who stood near the gate. It was carried by the wind, as was another horrifying sound- walkers. Murphy's head shot to see where it was coming from, and caught sight of Deanna in the lookout, a look of pure terror upon her face.
"Open the gate!" A man screamed. "Open the gate now!"
Murphy looked at Michonne and whispered, "Rick."
Growling reached their ears. Michonne bounded towards the gate and pulled back the covering, revealing a sprinting Rick through the bars. He was barely in front of the gigantic herd that chased him, and he pushed away the stragglers that reached for him on the sides. He looked exhausted- sweaty and breathless. God knows how long he'd been running.
"Open it!" Murphy shouted, tugging on the gate along with Michonne and Maggie.
It slid open as they pulled with all of their strength. Rick rushed past the women and collapsed as soon as he was behind the walls. The three immediately slammed the gate closed, just in time for the walkers to reach the entrance. Their hands slithered between the bars, outstretched to get as close to the live humans as possible. Their jaws clacked as they pushed their heads between the bars, not able to perceive the barrier between them and their prey. Murphy stumbled backwards as the herd hit the gate and they slid the covering closed in hopes to calm the walkers down.
They stepped away, their weapons raised as the sounds the walkers made only grew. More and more began barreling against the walls. Murphy stood, panting, looking to make sure the wall would hold. After it proved to be steady, she turned to find Michonne crouched beside Rick, who held his hand out to assure her that he was okay. Murphy made her way over and helped him off of the concrete, holding him up by the arm.
"Holy shit, Rick..." she mumbled.
Murphy didn't know if she was responding to the fact that he had brought a herd of walkers to the community's front door, or that he looked like he was about to keel over right in front of her. She pulled her hand away from his when she noticed the blood coating her fingers. Murphy looked at his pained face, lined with cuts, and urged Michonne to help him away from the gate.
"Come on, let's fix you up."
"No!" Rick insisted, panting. "Just wrap it later, there's no time."
"Rick-" Michonne reasoned, her hands gentle upon his figure.
"They need to hear it from me," Rick responded, his voice determined.
He looked over his shoulder at the Alexandrians that had begun to exit their homes, crowding around. Some had already begun to support the walls with spare beams. Murphy noted their cooperation. Some paced in worry, and others began to cry. Deanna stood, paralyzed in fear with her eyes locked upon the rattling gate. Rick turned to face the people, the leadership within him taking over. Murphy let him go and looked to Michonne, who had a worried expression upon her face.
"You can hear it," Rick announced, gesturing to the walls. "Some of you saw it. They got back here- half of them. Still enough to surround us twenty deep. Look, I know you're scared. You haven't seen anything like this. You haven't been through anything like this."
Murphy's gaze fell. She had.
"But we're safe, for now. The panel the truck hit seems intact. Looks like you reinforced it, just in case. That's good. Either way, the wall's gonna hold together," he paused, looking around at the people who stared at him for faith. "... can you? The others, they're gonna be back."
"They're gonna be back," Rosita assured, assuring herself as well. Abraham was out there, and she knew he would make it.
Rick nodded, continuing, "Daryl, Abraham, Sasha, they have vehicles. They're gonna lead 'em away, just like the others. And Glenn and Nicholas are gonna walk back through the front gate after. They know what they're doin'."
Murphy took hold of Maggie's hand beside her, giving her a look of encouragement. Maggie was scared, and she could see it. She noticed the slight tremble in her hand, the tilt in her brows that was barely noticeable. She was terrified of being alone. She was terrified of the baby having no father.
"And we know what we need to do. We keep noise to a minimum. Pull our blinds at night. Even better, keep the lights out. We'll try to make this place as quiet as a graveyard, see if they move on," Rick reasoned.
"This place is a graveyard!" an Alexandrian woman panicked.
Rick looked around at the people. He was silent, not knowing how to assure them any more than he already had. These people were too far gone in his eyes. He was trying, but he didn't know...
"The quarry broke open!" A voice announced. Murphy turned to find Aaron, a relieved smile gracing her lips at his being alive. "Those walkers were heading this way. All of them. The plan that Rick put into place stopped that from happening. He got half of them away. I was out there recruiting with Daryl. I wanted to try to get into a cannery and scavenge, and Daryl wanted to keep looking for people..."
He trailed, not knowing if he had the strength to continue. His eyes landed upon Murphy, who urged him to continue. She felt her heart clench at the mention of Daryl, but her eyes held assurance for anyone who needed it.
"We did what I wanted, and we wound up in a trap set by those people. I lost my pack. They must have followed our tracks. Those people who attacked us... they found their way back here because of me."
When he finished, the air was stagnant. The people didn't know what to say, overwhelmed with the attack and now the herd. Murphy shared a sympathetic look with Aaron, not able to comprehend the guilt that must have been coursing through his veins.
"There'll be more to talk about," Rick nodded, and Murphy followed his gaze to Morgan, who stood to the side.
The crowd began to disperse, everyone going their separate ways to come to terms with the load of new news. Maggie's hand slipped from Murphy's and she sped away, her hands running through her hair. Deanna left, her face expressionless and her gait stiff. Murphy turned to Rick and Michonne, and suddenly noticed Carl standing between the two. Michonne had her hand gently set upon his shoulder.
"Hey, kid," she smiled at him.
"Hi, Murphy," Carl replied, his lips tugging upward.
They were glad to see each other alive.
"I'm going to the infirmary. I'm sure Denise needs my help. Rick, you come at some point. Your hand needs stitches," Murphy said as she slipped her pack off her shoulders. "And please keep an eye on Maggie."
Rick nodded wordlessly, and Murphy began to head to her patients. Her pace quickened as she walked through the streets, dodging puddles of blood and chopped body parts. It seemed like something out of a horror movie, but the dead walked. Murphy shook her head in disbelief. Sometimes she wished she didn't care. Sometimes she wished she could turn her humanity off like a switch, just so it wouldn't hurt any more. But she couldn't. After a short trek, she reached the infirmary. Even from the outside, she could sense the chaos that ensued in there. When she knocked on the door and slowly entered, she heard a sigh of relief.
"Oh, thank god," Denise whispered, rushing forward and throwing her arms around Murphy's shoulders.
Murphy stumbled backward at the impact and immediately reciprocated, her eyes wide, "Hey! You okay?"
"No," Denise spoke, her voice quiet. "I couldn't save everyone."
Murphy rubbed her coworker's back soothingly and pulled away, "I'm so sorry. I should have been here."
"No," Denise shook her head with a sniff. "You were out there because you had to be. This attack... no one saw it coming. But I'm so glad you're back."
Murphy nodded with a soft smile, her ability to assure suddenly leaving her. She felt... lost. She didn't know if it was the realization that the herd was right there- memories of the night she lost everything flooding back. Maybe it was that she wasn't there when the community needed her most. Murphy didn't want to ask how many people Denise couldn't save. The guilt would be too much. Maybe it was that she didn't know if Daryl was alive. What if he wasn't? What if she'd never know? She shuddered at the thought and pulled back her dirty hair into a messy ponytail. She walked over to the sink and washed her hands, the surgeon's sterilization technique never leaving her mind.
"What can I do?" she asked.
Denise gestured to Scott, who lay unconscious in one of the infirmary beds, "His wound's infected. I dressed it, but... I don't know what the hell to do."
Murphy noticed her head hanging low, her jittery hands, and every other sign of anxiety emanating from Denise's figure. She stepped forward, and Denise looked up.
"Hey," Murphy whispered, her brows tilted upward in sentiment. "You did good, Denise. Look around. You saved all of these people."
She gestured to the infirmary that was lined with cots, but Denise shook her head, "I'm so scared about what's happening in here that I can't think about what's happening out there. Somehow that's actually good, and I don't know what to do with that. I just want him to live and for the roamers to go away. And for you to stay here so I can go back to my apartment and keep reading War and Peace."
Murphy chuckled and looked up at her through the golden strands of hair that fell out of her ponytail, "I can take it from here, honey. You need some rest. I can see how tired you are."
"You would do that?" Denise asked, shocked.
"Of course!" Murphy furrowed her brows and shooed her toward the door. "Trust me, I was a trauma surgeon back in the day. I know how hard it is to do your job when you're exhausted. And I think everyone deserves to do what they want to when there's a herd outside our walls."
Denise set her hand on the doorknob and looked over her shoulder at the doctor, "If... if you knew your life was going to end tomorrow... how would you spend your day?"
Murphy froze and thought for a moment, her eyes holding an indecipherable emotion, "I- I'd want to spend all the time I could with the people I love. No worries, no nothing. Just knowing they're with me would be enough comfort before the world ended."
Denise sent her a soft smile, "Daryl's going to be okay. He's going to be back."
Murphy pressed her lips together and nodded, sadness in her eyes, "I hope so."
Denise opened the door and sent one final look at her friend, "If I learned one thing in all this chaos... it's that it takes a hell of a lot to separate people who love each other. I know you'll be all right."
Before Murphy could reply, she'd shut the door behind her. The blinds swung back and forth, the only sound in the silent infirmary being that quiet swooshing and the steady breathing of the patients. She was left to her own thoughts, the last words of Denise echoing. As she prepared a syringe to extract the infected matter from Scott's wound, her hands persisted but her mind wandered. She had a lot to think about.
___
That night, after Murphy had stabilized Scott and the other patients, she sat in the infirmary in silence. Her head was propped in her palm. Her legs were crossed. Nothing kept her occupied save for the prevailing realization that floated in her mind. She supposed... it wasn't so much of a realization as an affirmation. Tara had joined her at some point in the evening, a pleasant surprise to Murphy to see her doing so well after her accident. The two talked, and Murphy was ecstatic to hear that she and Denise were an unofficial item. It was a sliver of joy in an otherwise dismal chapter of their lives. Halting their conversation was three solitary knocks. In came Aaron and Maggie.
"Hey!" Murphy greeted, immediately standing from her seat. "What's up?"
"I bumped my head, and am in need of a little assistance," Aaron chuckled, holding an icepack to his eyebrow. Maggie sent Murphy a tight-lipped smile.
Murphy laughed and patted the seat beside her, "Well, take a seat."
She grabbed some alcohol and gauze from a nearby cabinet as Aaron made himself comfortable. She noted that Maggie stayed standing. When she had her supplies, she crouched before Aaron and lowered the icepack, revealing a nasty gash with a bruise surrounding it. Her eyes flicked between him and Maggie.
"How did this happen?"
The two shared a look, and Maggie spoke up, "We... we went into the sewers, tryin' to find a way out of here."
"What?" Murphy breathed. "Maggie-"
"I couldn't-" Maggie started, her voice raised. She stopped and calmed herself. "I couldn't just stay here. Not when Glenn could be out there alone. I wanted to know. Even if he isn't... alive... I just needed to know that, Murph."
Murphy stared at her, understanding seeping from her gaze. She looked down at her materials and nodded, raising a pad of alcohol to Aaron's cut.
"All that matters is that you're both safe. You have to be alive for him to come back to."
Aaron winced at the stinging alcohol and spoke up, "There were a few walkers down there. I hit my head while fighting them off."
Murphy cleansed the cut, dressed the wound, and stood from her crouched position, "You're good to go. Come back if it bothers you, okay?"
"Okay," Aaron nodded sweetly. "It's good to see you, Murphy. Any word about Daryl?"
Murphy's eyes fell to her fiddling hands and she shook her head, "No. No, there isn't."
Aaron nodded and set a hand on her arm. He cared about Daryl, and knew that Murphy needed him more than she thought she did. He wanted nothing more than for him to come back safe, "He'll be back."
Murphy looked at Maggie, the two women sharing a common understanding for that moment in time, "They'll both be back."
Maggie tried to put a smile upon her face, but she couldn't. Optimism was always the more difficult path in times of hardship, but she knew that her husband was an absolute expert at that. His strength and resiliency was something she would never understand, no matter how much she tried to do the same.
Maggie picked up her belongings and muttered lowly, "I have to go."
She turned, and exited the infirmary without hesitation. The room was silent save for the clicking of the shutting door. Murphy shared a concerned look with Aaron, and turned to Tara in question. Tara nodded with a soft smile, knowing what she was asking.
"I got it here, Murph. You two go after her."
Murphy gestured for Aaron to follow her, and the two of them made their way after Maggie. They careened down the porch steps and looked around the area for her receding figure. Maggie walked down the street with purpose, straight towards a panel of the wall- the same one that kept the walkers out- that had a list of names beneath a title. In our memory, it read. How ironic that the names of those who had been taken by the outside world were listed on a barrier before it.
The walkers growled outside, but their were quieter in the silent night. Their bodies banged against the steel panels softly. Aaron and Murphy watched as Maggie wet a small piece of cloth with her water bottle and began to frantically scrub a name that Murphy knew without looking, Glenn. Murphy approached her left, and Aaron, her right. Murphy reached down for the bottle and splashed a bit on the G, rubbing it with her sleeve. Aaron did the same. As the three came together to make a statement to themselves, to Alexandria, and to the forsaken world they lived in, Murphy spoke up.
"Before he left, he told me about your father. He showed me his pocket watch, and... and said how he didn't want to let either of you down. He told me that you'd want him to follow his heart, and following his heart meant doing the right thing," Murphy whispered, and stared deep into Maggie's glassy eyes. "He wanted me to let you know either way... that he loves you. He said he was coming back, Maggie, and he never lies."
Maggie chuckled tearfully, her scrubbing not ceasing. In fact, her strokes were becoming more certain.
"When he gets back, it's worth mentioning that Aaron, Erin, works for a boy or a girl, depending on the spelling," Aaron added, lightening the mood. Maggie grinned. "Just saying."
"I don't know, I like Murphy..." Murphy trailed with a smile.
"Hey- what about Murphy's Law?" Aaron interjected playfully. "Whatever can go wrong will go wrong?"
"No, no, no! Whatever can happen will happen," Murphy insisted. "You've got it all wrong, my friend."
As the three of them joked in the dark of night, they proved to be a bright light in a dim world. They didn't know what the next day would bring... what news, good or bad. But they were certain that faith in loved their ones was worth more than anything outside those walls could provide. If they had gotten through everything life had thrown at them so far, why was this any different? Glenn and Daryl would make it back alive, as would the others. That, they were certain of.
AUTHOR'S NOTE — wooo, another update! this one was pretty boring lol, but it was more of a filler chapter. i think it's incredibly important to show murphy and the others actually coming to terms with the herd outside the walls, and what that means. i feel like other fanfics i've read have kind of sped through this part of the show, and it's actually sooo important for all of the characters, especially since it's before you know who shows up!! 😳 so please bear with me! :) the next chapter will have daryl meeting dwight, and i'm not sure exactly how long that'll take, but the reunion is almost here ahhh! i'm so excited! ☺️ also, thank you all for the lovely comments on the last chapter. it really means so much to know that people are still sticking with this book after everything. i love you guys! <333