Chapter 26
My heart was beating loud and fast after posting the photo. Notifications kept on popping because of the photo that I just uploaded so I had to uninstall my social media accounts for a while. I immediately dialed Neil's phone number, hoping he would answer.
"Congrats!", bungad niya pagkasagot ng tawag ko. I smiled and felt relieved that he was happy about it.
"Are you not mad at me? The management can get me out of our upcoming movie...", saad ko dahil inaasahan ko na rin naman 'yon. I'm happy and thankful that Tita Jen will do everything she can for me but I know as well that the management can't just give in to what we want. Lalo pa ngayon na pakiramdam ko ay maraming fans namin ni Neil ang hindi matutuwa.
"What? Hell, no! I'm proud of you", he paused and continued, "I wish I can do that too once I found my child and Courtney", he said and sighed.
Courtney Villaseñor. Neil may be busy with his career but he sees to it that he always gets updates about Courtney. Hindi nga namin alam kung bakit hindi pa rin mahanap samantalang nagpapakawala na ng malaking pera si Neil para sa mga private investigators na kinuha niya.
"Didn't I tell you to ask help from your family? Well, I know how you feel because like you... iba rin ang tingin sa amin dahil hindi rin kami ang legal family. But your situation now is kinda different. You have a child, Neil", I reminded him and I heard him heave a deep sigh.
"No. Courtney is from a rich family. Ayaw kong magkagulo kaya hanggat maaari, I'm keeping everything for myself... well with you because you knew", saad niya.
"Maybe Theo can help", suhestiyon ko at natagalan siya ng sagot doon.
"The last time I checked, the Villaseñors and Deltrazos are not in good terms. Hindi mo ba alam na balak ipaako ni Courtney ang anak namin kay Xythos?", Neil revealed and what he just said made me froze for a moment.
"What? Are you sure about that? Bakit naman niya 'yon gagawin?", I can't help but raise my voice habang pinagdadrive ako ni Kuya Lito pabalik sa condo unit ni Theo.
"I have nothing that time. Her family will disown her because a loser like me got her pregnant", paliwanag niya at naalala ko naman na nga na nakwento na niya 'yon sa akin. I just don't get the reason why Courtney will involve Xythos here. Kung ganoon maaaring pinagtalunan pala 'yon dati nina Calista at Xythos. Or maybe Calista left because of that. I don't really know anymore.
"You're not a loser", iyon na lamang ang nasabi ko at natawa siya.
"That time, I was. At hindi ko rin naman alam na nabuntis ko siya. When the news about her being pregnant spread, I know that I was the father kaya hindi ko maintindihan kung bakit hindi siya nagsasalita noong tinatanong siya ng media. She made people assume that Xythos got her pregnant but I understand. I understand why she had to do that", bakas ang lungkot at pangungulila sa boses ni Neil.
"Mahahanap mo rin siya. I don't know where in this world she is hiding but I'm sure we'll find her"
"It's just that... it was too late when I found out where she's residing. Kung sana mas maaga kong nalaman kung saan siya tinago ng mga magulang niya habang buntis siya, sana... sana nakita ko siya at napigilang umalis. I can give her now the life she and our child deserve to have. Kung kailan naman ako nakaangat, tsaka na nahuli ang lahat"
"Are you sure you don't want me to ask Theo? Maiintindihan naman siguro ni Theo kapag sinabi ko ang sitwasyon mo", suhestiyon ko ulit dahil baka naman nga may alam din siya o kaya si Xythos.
"Hindi na. I appreciate it, Clara. But I don't think I should involve them here again. Hindi na bale. Kaya ko 'to. Kakayanin ko. About the news regarding you and Theo, ako ang bahala. I will defend you and I will also make sure na ikaw pa rin ang makakasama ko for our movie", saad niya.
"Thank you, Neil"
"No worries. Speaking of the news, baha na ng tags ang social media accounts ko. Baka ito na 'yon. I'll contact my handler first, okay? Don't worry. I got you", he said before he bid goodbye.
Bago bumaba sa kotse ay nagsuot kaagad ako ng shades at mask. Hindi ko alam kung may makakakilala sa akin at kung mayroon nga, baka dagsa ang media rito mamaya. The admin and staff won't let anyone know that I am residing here because the Deltrazos own this whole tower. Ang kinatatakot ko ay baka 'yung mga nakatira rito naman ang magkalat.
Handa naman akong magpainterview. Handa akong humarap sa mga tao at magpaliwanag. It's just that things are too overwhelming for me now and I can't think properly. Kalat ang isip ko ngayon dahil sigurado akong pati si Theo ay magugulat kapag nabalitaan niya ang ginawa ko.
All I want to do now is rest. I don't want to entertain anyone at the moment. Magsasalita ako kapag nakapagpahinga na ako.
I slept all day inside our room. Isang malutong na mura ang gumising sa akin at pagtingin ko ay si Theo pala 'yon.
"Shit!", he cursed. With half-opened eyes, I looked at our overlooking view of the city. Gabi na at kitang kita ang mumunting mga ilaw mula sa mga nagtataasang building sa paligid.
"Hi", I said and stretched my arms.
"I was so worried", lumapit siya sa akin at pawis na pawis. Niyakap niya ako nang mahigpit na akala mo naman ay hindi kami nagkita kaninang umaga.
"Why? Have... have you heard of the news?", I asked him.
"Yeah. You weren't answering my calls and messages so I thought you were in trouble or something. Did something bad happen? Anong sabi ng handler mo? What about your upcoming projects and your loveteam? Nagalit ba – "
I stopped him from speaking and sealed his lips with mine. He responded to my kisses but also withdrew from it. So he's really worried, huh?
"Alam kong namiss mo ako at ang katawan ko pero sagutin mo muna ako, love – ouch!", kinurot ko ang tagiliran niya dahil umiiral na naman ang kayabangan niya.
"Everything is going to be fine, okay? I talked to my handler and she's fine with it. Wala naman akong nilabag sa kontrata ko. It's just that... mukhang last project na namin ni Neil 'yung upcoming movie namin or baka mapalitan ako pero ayos lang naman. I'm sure marami pang darating na projects. So chill, babe", I said and smiled at him.
"Are we really going public now?", ngiting ngiti niyang tanong sa akin.
"Yes. Why? You don't want it?", subok ko sa kanya at pinitik niya naman ang noo ko.
"Of course, I want it. Ang dami kong follower requests. I-public ko na rin ba account ko?", tanong niya sa akin. Naroon ang mga pictures namin sa Instagram niya pero dahil nakaprivate ang account niya, iilan lang ang nakakakita. Iyong mga walang pakialam sa mga ganitong mga tsismis.
"Ikaw ang bahala but... they might bash you", I reminded him. Baka may mga fans pa rin na ipaglaban kami ni Neil at kung anu-anong mga i-comment sa account ni Theo.
"I don't mind. Bash me all they want. Walang makakasira sa mood ko", hinagkan niya ako nang marahan at pagkatapos ay tumingin diretso sa 'king mga mata. "I'm so happy. Parang sasabog ang puso ko sa saya. Thank you", he said and kissed me again.
Kinabukasan ay pumayag na akong magpainterview. It was an exclusive interview and I'm sure the press will be outside the studio after.
"Good evening, Clara. Welcome to the program", bati sa akin ng host.
"Good evening, Louie", I greeted and smiled. Hindi ito live and it will be aired some time later in the evening.
"I will get straight to the point. What was the Instagram post all about? I mean it clearly says that both of you are in love but can you tell us what's the story behind that romantic photo"
"Well, we are in a private island that time", I paused when I noticed that the VTR was showing the photo that I posted. "I asked for a vacation because I badly want to rest. I've been working nang tuloy tuloy so I thought I should ask for a vacation and the management allowed me to do so. In fact, I am still on vacation hanggang ngayon at sa susunod pang buwan", I laughed and continued.
"Sakto kasi tapos na 'yung trabaho ko tapos we're celebrating our anniversary kaya I think I had the perfect time to ask for a break from work. And yes, we took a lot of pictures together and even before going back here in Manila, I thought that maybe it's about time for me to let everyone know about him... about us".
"Weren't you scared? Kasi ang dami niyong fans ni Neil at alam ng mga tao is... kayo"
"I was scared to reveal the truth because Neil and I have solid fans and I am very grateful to them kaya lang ang pangit naman na lagi na lang akong takot. I didn't lie in the first place. Neil and I are bestfriends and whenever we tell people that we're happy together, it's true. Masaya talaga kami because we know each other very well at grabe 'yung friendship namin. We weren't faking anything because that's just what we are as friends. Hindi rin naman namin sinabi na may relasyon kami dahil wala naman talaga"
"Yes, I have to agree with that. And Neil was defending you, am I right? Kasi ang daming nagreact; some were very supportive and some were not. Pinagtatanggol ka ni Neil sa mga hindi masaya para sa iyo", dagdag ni Louie.
"Yeah because he knows from the start. Bago pa kami i-launch, alam na niya 'yung about sa amin ni Theo"
"Do you wanna say anything to your fans?"
"I just want to thank them for understanding me and for supporting me and Neil. We can still work together pa rin naman", ngiti ko sa host.
"And a message to Theo Deltrazo, napakagwapo. He's one of the heirs of Deltrazo Holdings, everyone", dagdag ni Louie. I breathed heavily. Sana hindi na niya sinabi 'yung tungkol sa DH. Hindi naman ako na-orient dito. Why do I have to say a message for Theo 'e sa iisang unit lang naman kami natutulog?
"Well, I just want you to know na I want nothing but the best for the both of us. And you know the rest because I always tell you everything naman", awkward kong tapos ng message ko para kay Theo at doon na pinutol ang interview.
Gusto kong maging vocal tungkol kay Theo pero sa tingin ko kasi hindi pa ito ang tamang panahon para roon lalo na't mainit ang mata sa amin ng publiko. Marami sa mga fans namin ni Neil ang hindi masaya sa balita at ayaw kong lalo silang galitin. Ayaw kong si Theo ang makumpurmiso dahil sa mga fans namin ni Neil.
Besides, hindi ko pa rin natatanong si Theo tungkol dito. I don't know if he's okay with the media attention. Sure, he loves attention from people especially from those who belong to his sphere but that was before. He's different now because he matured a lot and back then, the attention that the media gives to him was all because he's a Deltrazo. Now, the media is focused on him because he's my boyfriend.
Mabuti na lang din pala at hindi pa naisapubliko ang engagement naming dalawa. Hindi na rin naman kailangan pa. With or without the arranged engagement, I know we'll marry each other.
Sa backstage kung saan dadaan patungo sa dressing room, bago pumasok sa kwarto ay natanaw ko ang PA ni Jane. I know her PA and I confirmed that she's here when I saw her printed name pasted on the door of the other dressing room just across mine.
"Hi!", I waved at her PA who smiled awkwardly at me. "Is Jane inside?", tanong ko. Sasagot na sana siya nang biglang lumabas sa pinto si Jane.
"Martha, nasaan 'yung – Oh!", saad ni Jane at nagulat nang makita ako.
"Hey", I said and smiled at her. Umalis ang PA ni Jane sa harapan namin. Jane didn't smile back at me and I don't know why. Hindi naman siya ganito sa akin dati pero kailan lang, pakiramdam ko nanlalamig siya sa akin.
"How are you? It's been a while", dagdag ko dahil nakatitig lang siya sa akin.
"I'm good. Excuse me", sagot niya at bumalik na sa dressing room niya pero bago niya maisarado ang pinto ay nakapasok ako sa loob.
"Do we have a problem, Jane? I've been texting you but you weren't replying. You also unfollowed me –"
"Is that why you're here? Gusto mo ng textmate at ng follow back mula sa akin?", she raised a brow at me and remained with her stern expression. Hindi ko alam kung anong nagawa ko sa kanyang mali. I don't understand why she's acting this way to me.
"No. If you don't want to text or if you're detoxing your social media, that's totally fine. I just want to know if we're okay because I feel like we're not", mahinahon kong sabi. Malayo ang dressing room at private area ito pero may mga PA at staff na napapadaan pa rin to check on the artists.
Ayaw ko ng gulo o away. I want to talk to her in a peaceful manner. She's my friend.
"Ha! Ang plastic mo!", pinandilatan niya ako ng mata. All I can see in her was pure disgust and anger at me.
"Ano bang nagawa ko? Plastic? Hindi kita pina-plastic, Jane. Kaibigan kita at totoo ako sa'yo", paliwanag ko sa kanya. She laughed without humor and looked at me again with anger.
"You and I were friends. Magkaibigan tayo dati noong hindi ka pa sikat. But when you finally made your way up, you stole everything from me. You took away my career from me, you snake!"
"I don't understand! I didn't steal anything from you!"
"Oh really? Binigay ko sa'yo 'yung role ko sa movie with Sir Ariel and Ms. Carmen because I thought you were my friend. Pagkatapos 'non, anong nangyari? Inagaw mo na lahat. Wala akong project dahil sa'yo. I had to audition for roles na sa'yo lang din naman libreng mapupunta kahit hindi mo naman pinaghirapang makuha!"
"I worked hard for every single thing that I have now, Jane. Wala akong nakuha nang libre because I had to sacrifice a lot of things. I didn't get anything for free!"
"Stop making yourself look like you're the protagonist here. Lahat na lang gusto mo sa'yo. Lahat na lang ng atensyon gusto mo sa'yo! They cancelled my appearance today in this stupid show because of you. Because to them, you're more important. Ano bang mayroon sa buhay mo, 'ha? You have a boyfriend? Fine! Ginagamit mo naman ngayon ang mayaman mong boyfriend para pag-usapan ka. Nagyayabang ka na naman!"
"I am not using my boyfriend, Jane! How dare you?! I'm sorry if they cancelled your guesting here because of me. I was not informed! But don't you dare drag Theo here!", parang may goma na nabiktal sa akin nang isali niya sa usapan si Theo. This is what I hate about showbiz. Iyong mga taong hindi naman dapat kasali sa issue, sinasali.
"And why? Natatakot ka bang malaman ng mga tao 'yang tunay mong ugali? You used me. I won't be surprised if you're also using your rich boyfriend. Tandaan mo 'to, Clara", she pointed at me with her index finger but I immediately spiked it down. "You're the network's favorite because you're rich, you're pretty, but you're actually a good for nothing. At darating din ang araw... pupulutin ka rin sa baba. You're a star now and I'll wait for your fall. User".
"I don't know what happened to you. Greed and envy must have eaten you, 'no? Mahirap bang mainggit, Jane?", I looked at her from head to toe. "Then, mainggit ka lang. Iinggitin kita lalo".
I went home feeling tired and frustrated. Hindi ko na rin alam kung anong mararamdaman ko. Nalulungkot ako dahil sa nangyari sa aming magkaibigan. I thought we were both fine and happy for each other because I was happy for her. I was proud of her. Hindi ko akalain na ganoon pala ang tingin niya sa akin.
All this time I thought she was also happy for my achievements. Akala ko hindi siya magpapakain sa inggit niya pero ito lang din pala ang mangyayari. I don't want to fight with her but I just can't control my anger a while ago when she started talking about me using Theo.
Hinding hindi ko gagamitin si Theo – sa pag-aartista ko man o sa kahit na anong sitwasyon. I will never use him for my own gain nor for my family's gain.
"Something's bothering you, love?", tanong ni Theo habang tinutulungan ko siyang maghain ng pagkain namin. Nagsaing ako at siya naman ay nagtake out na lang ng ulam namin. I will try to learn to cook para pag-uwi niya, may kanin at ulam na.
"I'll tell you later. Let's enjoy the food muna", I said and tried my best to smile at him.
We were cuddling on our bed when I decided to tell him about Jane. It shouldn't really concern him because it's my problem with Jane.
"Am I a bad person?", I asked Theo. He was busy playing with my hair when he stopped after hearing my question.
"No. You're not perfect but you're not evil", sagot niya.
"Do you think I am not a good friend?", tanong ko ulit.
"Judging the way your friends treat you, you are a good friend. Bakit, may problema ka ba sa mga kaibigan mo?", inayos niya ang higa niya. Tinukod nito ang kanang siko sa unan at pinatong ang kanang bahagi ng mukha niya sa kanyang kamay habang masuyo akong tinitingnan.
"I fought with Jane earlier sa studio", I sighed. "She hates me because she thinks I stole the spotlight from her", I smiled sadly at him. I don't know what to feel anymore. I want us to fix our issues but I don't think that's possible to happen now. Sobra ang galit niya sa akin at pakiramdam ko, higit pa sa trabaho namin ang galit niya sa akin. Sinasali niya ang personal na buhay ko at iyon ang hindi ko gusto. If she has issues with me, I'll reflect on my actions and do my best to fix it. But she chose to include my social status and my relationship with Theo. Dahil doon, hindi ko napigilan ang inis ko kanina.
"Who's Jane?", inosente niyang tanong. Umirap ako at natawa siya. "Seriously, who is she? I don't know her", dagdag niya pa.
"Baka hindi mo na masyadong nakikita kasi senior high pa lang kami busy na 'yon. She stopped going to school after high school. Anyway, I just feel bad about what happened. I said some harsh words too. I mean... I confronted her to ask if we're okay and then she said rude words tapos 'yun... wala naman akong balak na makipagpalitan ng harsh words kaso – " hindi ko na naituloy pa ang dapat na sasabihin.
Kung sasabihin ko kay Theo na nadawit siya at iyon ang iniisip ng kaibigan ko na kapwa artista ko rin, baka isipin niya 'yon. He's not really the type of person who would give a damn about other people's opinion of him but I know that he will if I am involved. Iyon din kaya ang tingin ng ibang tao sa akin? I hope not because I love Theo. Hindi ko siya ginawang nobyo ko para sa mga bagay na inaakusa sa akin ni Jane.
"Kaso?", tanong niya.
"Kaso... namemersonal na siya. I don't know. She has issues with my popularity, my projects, everything. Kahit nga iyong pagiging anak-mayaman ko, issue sa kanya. Hindi ko akalain na magiging ganoon ang tingin niya sa akin. I swear, she was nice when we were okay", problemado kong saad at tsaka niya ako iniusod palapit pa lalo sa kanya.
"Hindi siya totoong kaibigan kung ganoon. A real friend will never want you miserable, will never feel bad about your achievements, after you reap the fruits of your hardwork. She's not a loss", he comforted me. I breathed heavily.
"I have friends... marami. Kaya lang ilan lang kasi 'yung mga kaibigan ko na... one call away. Ilan lang 'yung mga home friends ko tapos mababawasan pa"
"You have Shawn, Nicole, and Troy. You have Neil. Pancho's also there for you", he smiled and traced my lips using his thumb, "You have me", and then planted a soft kiss on it.
Sa January pa ako babalik sa trabaho kaya malaya pa ako para sa buong buwan ng Disyembre. I made sure to prepare my gifts for my loved ones. I wrapped them all while Theo made sure that his schedule was cleared because he plans to spend the holidays with me and his family.
For Christmas, magkasama ang pamilya namin at ni Theo. Surprisingly, I was able to convince Kuya Pancho to come with us. Kumpleto kami ngayong Pasko sa unang pagkakataon at kasama rin si Xythos. Magkikita-kita na lamang sa mansion ng mga Deltrazo.
"I told you... let's just iron my hair para straight na lang", I complained while looking at Theo on my vanity mirror. Hindi siya mapakali dahil pinapanood niya 'yung tutorial sa YouTube kung paano magkulot ng buhok. He even wanted to use my hair extensions.
"Bakit? Hindi naman masusunog ang buhok mo rito", katwiran pa niya at tsaka pinaikot-ikot ulit ang mga hibla ng buhok ko sa electric curler. Nakasimangot ako habang pinagmamasdan siyang ginagawa iyon. Pinahihirapan lang niya ang sarili niya.
But why am I surprised? He is Theo Deltrazo. He will do everything to please me, to impress me, and if that includes curling my hair, gagawin niya talaga. He even wanted to do my make-up! Napapanood niya raw kasi sa mga kasabayan kong artista 'yung mga "Boyfriend does my make-up" vlogs kaya gusto niya rin daw masubukan.
Nagtatalo pa kami kanina dahil pag-upo ko sa vanity area ay kinakalikot na niya ang mga make-up ko. Good thing he compromised. Buhok na lang daw.
"Oo na! Just don't mess up. Please", pagmamakaawa ko at tumawa naman siya. I love him so much.
Maayos ang naging Pasko namin. Nagulat pa nga ako dahil hindi nagtalo sina Kuya at Dad. Everything went well only that I can still see sadness in Xythos' eyes. Busy silang lahat sa loob. Nauna nang umalis si Kuya Pancho at si Theo naman ay nakikipag-usap pa sa mga magulang namin. I looked for Xythos and I found him in front of their swimming pool, drinking a glass of alcohol.
"Merry Christmas", I said and handed him my gift. I gave him a Rolex.
"Thanks", he smiled at me. "Merry Christmas", he added.
"It's a wrist watch", I said.
"Didn't plan to surprise me, eh?", he chuckled.
"Hmm. The reason why I gave you that might surprise you though", ngumuso ako. Nakakahiya. I am not really good with words but I just feel like he needs time. They both need time.
"Obviously, the watch tells time and maybe you need time, the both of you... to heal and to get back on track", dagdag ko at tumango-tango naman siya.
"I miss her", malungkot niyang saad at kinagat ang pang-ibabang labi. "But I can't do anything to be with her yet because like you said... she needs time and so do I. I guess I'll just wait for her to heal and come back"
"And you?"
"I'll fix myself. Baka sabay kaming kumuha ng MBA namin ni Theo o baka mauna siya nang kaunti. I don't know how I'll start but... if Calista's doing her best to survive, I should too. Para pagbalik niya, maayos na ang lahat. If she won't come back, then I'll go to her"
"I'm here. We're all here for you", I smiled and bid goodbye to him. Bumalik na ako sa loob at ilang minuto pa ay umalis na rin kami ni Theo roon. Sa bahay ay tsaka ko inabot ang regalo ko kay Theo.
I bought him a new set of neckties. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero gustong-gusto ko na ako ang nagkakabit ng necktie niya lagi bago siya pumasok sa trabaho. Ngumisi siya nang makita 'yon.
"Gustong-gusto mo na may neck tie ako 'no?", tanong niya sa akin at tsaka ako tumango. "Pero gigil na gigil kang alisin kapag pinagnanasaan mo katawan ko", tumawa siya nang malakas kaya binato ko siya ng throw pillow sa sofa.
"Ang yabang mo", umirap ako at tsaka naman siya nanggigil ulit sa akin at niyakap ako.
"I got you two new bottles of your favorite perfume brand", bulong niya kaya lumapad ang ngiti ko. "You're obsessed with perfumes lately", bulong niya ulit.
Kung dati ay gadgets ang luho ko, ngayon naman ay puro perfume na. I'm turning 21 on March but I feel like I changed a lot in a span of what? Two years?
Dumampi ang ilong niya sa batok ko at hinagkan 'yon. Tumindig ang mga balahibo ko sa mga mumunting dampi ng halik niya sa balat ko. The next thing I know, he successfully unzipped the back of my dress. Dumulas ang kamay niya patungo sa harapan ko at walang kahira-hirap na inalis ang nipple tapes sa dibdib ko.
"You look so hot in this red dress but even hotter without it", saad niya at kinalong ako sa ibabaw ng mga hita niya. Nilaylay ni Theo ang strap ng dress ko at tuluyan nang nahulog ang pangtaas na parte 'non hanggang sa tiyan ko. He freed my chest and massaged them.
"Oh god Theo!", I said as he tugged my hardened crowns. He inserted his right hand on the hem of my dress and skillfully removed my underwear. Hindi ko alam kung paanong ang galing-galing niya kahit naman nakatalikod ako sa kanya at nakakalong sa hita niya.
"Part your thighs wider, babe", he commanded and inserted three on my entrance.
After the make-outs, he carried me inside our room and God knows what happened next.
"Merry Christmas", I greeted him while he's pounding inside me.
"Merry Christmas, love. Mapapaaga nga lang ang New Year mo", he said and then I felt his release inside me.
Indeed, Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.
Damn you, Theo Nathaniel. I love you so much.