I've had my fair share of spilling blood in my life, brains blown on walls and floors, teeth pulled out, skin peeled off, flesh ripped from bones, gun wounds, some of my own, explosions, blasts, all the fucking things you can think of, but nothing has ever scared me more than the blood of Eve on her white skin, her thin legs, on my fucking hands!
Sitting in the back seat of the car and holding her in my lap I search for signs of life on her pale face, head leaned against my bare chest, feeling her cold lips on my skin, gripping her wrist to find some pulse.
She's cold, she's so fucking cold and I'm pressing my cheek on her forehead, trying to give her some heat from my skin.
"How is she?" Lucas is asking in an unbelievably controlled manner as if I have a doll in my arms and not his daughter.
Well, I guess that's why Lucas is Lucas. He has one mission now, taking his daughter to the hospital and that's exactly what he does.
"Breathing. Just fucking drive, Luc!" I mumble an order at him although he's actually piloting the car.
He pulls his phone out, connects it to the car's Bluetooth, and calls the emergency hospital.
"Emergency Hospital, how may I help you?" a woman's voice replies.
"My name is Lucas Tate and I'm bringing in my daughter, Eveline Tate, for... a possible miscarriage... I guess... We'll be there in three minutes," he speaks awfully composed, like a solder although I've felt his voice cracking at some point.
I squeeze Eve closer to my chest. I've never fucking begged in my life, but right now I'm begging her in a whisper to hold on, to fucking hold on, not to give up on me.
The moment Lucas pulls the car right at the hospital's main access, nurses are rushing out with a wheeled stretcher.
He jumps out of the driver's seat and runs around the car, opening the door to my side even before the stretcher is next to the car.
He takes Eve from my arms, laying her down on the stretcher in perfect synchronization with the medical team and the nurses push it back in, waiting no more, while I get down from the car and rush after them with Lucas on my heels.
Both of us are running behind the nurses, Lucas hoping he can get another glimpse at his daughter and me struggling to get one more squeeze on Eve's hand before they take her into the surgery room, but when I'm just about to reach it, a nurse pins herself in front of me.
"Sir, you can't get in there! This is the furthest you can go, sir," she says and all I think about is what a pity I don't have my gun with me!
In that second over there my brain switches instantly to a survival mood, remembering I have Lucas next to me. So, I curl my hand around his waist and pull out his gun, aiming it at the nurse's nose in a millisecond.
"Move!" I roar at her while she pales and raises her hands but keeps herself frozen in her spot, bound to let nobody pass.
Lucas reacts immediately, hitting my ribs with his elbow and fetching the gun from my hand, twisting my wrist.
"Don't be stupid, Enzo!" he shouts and shoves the gun back into his belt.
I groan in pain, jerking my body to my right side and I know it has been wrong of me to point a gun at a nurse in a hospital, but it has been an instinct! A fucking instinct!
They are taking my Eve away, to a place where I can't watch over her, where I can't make sure they do their best, and thus... I've snapped. It was just a fucking instinct.
"Sit. Down!" Lucas orders, pushing me on a chair and apologizing to the nurse who disappears even before he finishes his sentence.
I run my hands through my hair over and over as I don't know what to do with them. In the mafia it's easy. It doesn't suit you, you shoot. Done!
But here...
Lucas walks a few steps away from me, still keeping me within his vision, and pulls the phone out of his pocket, dialing a number.
"Sweetheart, you need to listen to me and keep calm," he speaks in a low, steady voice. "We are at the Emergency Hospital. It's Eve... The baby?!" he inquires visibly surprised that his wife knows about Eve being pregnant. "Well, I guess so... Do you want me to come over and pick you up?" he asks and listens for a few moments. "Alright, love. We are waiting for you here. I love you."
"Sir..." the nurse I've earlier threatened with the gun says, shoving a doctor's clean shirt and a pair of crocs under my nose.
I lift my eyes at her, confused, and it's only now that I realize I'm shirtless and barefoot.
Those seconds I keep glaring at her are my awakening moments when I realize I might lose Eve and the baby I've just learned about. She has been off for too long, there has been too much blood around.
Stretching my hands to grab the things from the nurse, I stop halfway, seeing them stained with Eve's dry blood.
"Your better wash first, sir," she says with a small smile, placing the crocs next to my feet on the floor and the shirt on the chair near me. "You don't want your wife to see you this way when she is awake up, now do you?" she scolds me gently.
I stare at her, sucking in those words that give me hope, somehow making me confident that it will all be alright, so I rush to slip the crocs on and move towards the restroom she has pointed at me.
I walk in straight to the sink and turn on the water tap, washing my hands with soap a few times until the blood is all gone, throwing cold water on my face as well a few good times.
I feel the veins at my temple squirming under my skin and my head is heavy, my eyes frown. I look at my reflection in the mirror, pinning my hands on the sink's edges and telling myself that she will be alright.
That nice nurse said she would be alright, didn't she?
If only I knew she was pregnant, if only she had told me I would have come earlier, I would have never let her be alone no matter what fucking time she needed.
I'm going to be a father again...
No. I'm going to be the father of Eve's baby.
And the fear of losing doubles instantly, darkening my thoughts, reviving the pain and hurt I've gone through when losing Vivi and our angel, years back.
I shake that thought away and get out of the toilet, walking into the waiting room where Becks is already together with Feli and Massimo.
Lucas is crouched over Becks, holding each other tight while she cups his face in her elegant hands, glaring up at him, tears streaming out of her green eyes.
"She'll be okay, Lucas. She's strong," she keeps telling him while he towers her frame like a mountain, with his shoulders bent in front and his head dropped low, pinned with his chin to his chest.
I put on the shirt, silently while Feli walks up to me.
"Enzo..." she whispers while I run my hands through my hair, messing it up worse than it is and trying to keep my anger at bay.
"I'm sor..." she tries again.
"Don't you fucking say it! Just don't!" I shout at her, silencing even her breath. "You're not sorry! None of you is fucking sorry! What the fuck was in your head keeping this from me?! You knew she is pregnant! Becks knew!"
"None of these would have happened if it wasn't for you!" Lucas roars at me.
"What the fuck that's supposed to mean, Lucas?" I ask, pissed like hell, ready to jump, ready to die! Now or never, Lucas has to deal with it!
"It means what the fuck it means! None of these would have happened if you kept your fucking dick in your pants!" he shouts back and I plunge a fist into his jaws, having enough of his blaming.
He pays me back, crushing the bones of my jaws and bouncing me back, raising my anger to impossible levels as I throw myself over him.
"Stop it!" Becks shouts at us while people around are distancing, and some security guys walk in. "I'm sick of this shit you have towards each other!" her voice is sharp but shaking and tears never stop rolling down her beautiful face.
The pain of a suffering mother flushes in her eyes, and her parted lips are quivering.
"If you want to kill each other, take it the fuck outside and not at the expense of my daughter's life! Go! Make a fool of yourselves and may the best one come back, but you'll put a stop to this nonsense, one way or another," she continues.
"Our daughter, Becca!" Lucas replies in anger.
"Well, if that's so, act like it! Your daughter needs us to be parents, not judges, Lucas," her words are coming to me like a "go for it" so I grab the collar of his shirt, dragging him outside with the clear intention of having this settled once and for all.
Once outside he pulls himself out of my grip, stepping back, with such hate in his eyes that I can feel it burning my face.
"You will back the fuck off!" I speak in a deadly tone while pocking my finger in his chest. "I don't get why you are so much against this."
"Are you insane? There are almost twenty-five years between the two of you. You are the closest thing to an uncle that she has ever known. You slept with her mother, for fuck's sake!" he yells.
"You know damn well what has been between me and Becks, and you also know it's a done deal a quarter of a decade ago. What Eve and I have has nothing to do with it."
"She is my daughter!"
"And she is the woman I love!"
That's all it took for us to jump on a fistfight again, nothing we haven't had before but with higher hate than ever. Fists were plunging from one to another, rolling on the ground, clenched in each other's neck, spitting venom and curses through tight teeth, broken lips, and bleeding noses, none of us losing or winning.
We keep on fighting, spelling our both frustrations until we lay on the ground next to each other, breathing heavily and spiting the blood out of our mouths, groaning in pain and exhaustion.
"Fuck you, Benito!" he mumbles. "I can't believe my daughter is going to have a child with you," he says, sitting up and wiping his bloody lips with the back of his hand.
"Well, I love you too, Tate!" I reply, and I mean it.
I really care for this motherfucker, we have been like brothers longer than I've been with my own blood.
He stands up and offers me a hand to help, which I grab and jump on my feet, brain swirling in a daze.
"If you ever hurt Eve, I'm going to kill you, Enzo. I swear," he makes it a promise and I glare at him, secretly wishing I've been a better father for Emillia, a father like Lucas is for Eve.
"You're better than me in so many ways, Luc. I love Eve, I really do. I can't bear the thought of hurting her."
He glares at me, eyes softening, but still frowned. He nods at me as if he is having a mental debate, with me, with himself... God knows.
"I'm sorry you have to go through this," he finally says. "She'll be fine, and the baby will be fine. She is young, healthy... strong. And damn stubborn. She won't give up, Enzo," he tells me, rubbing the back of his neck, uncomfortable for giving in.
"I've never planned for this, Luc. She's just... she's Eve. She's incomparable. And I mean it when I say I love her," I reply, putting my heart on the table, right in front of him.
"I know. If anything, you are the one I've always trusted to take care of Becca back then. I was even planning to hook you up with her again if I hadn't gotten out of that shit in one piece that time, in Italy," he says with a smirk, peeking at me from the corner of his eye.
"Take care of my daughter, Benito," he demands in a heavy tone.
"You know I will, Lucas," I reply with unbeatable confidence as if my mouth is not mine, but still it perfectly speaks my mind.
I would have said it a thousand times. I would have shouted it louder, no matter how much Lucas was going to be against us, but now that doesn't look to be the case.
Lucas seems to finally understand, to accept that what has grown between me and Eve is neither planned nor ephemeral.
I love Eve, I love her as I have never loved before, as I've never thought I will ever have the chance to love again. And I'm never going to give up on her, not until she asked me to... if she ever does.
He nods his head at me one more time, pressing his lips in a thin line, walking away.
"Lucas..." I say and he turns around towards me, waiting for me to spell what I have to say.
"Thank you," I speak loudly, with unbeatable honesty.
He walks back a few more steps and pulls me in a strong, manly hug, tapping my back, like the brother he has always been to me.
"Welcome. Now come on, let's get in," he replies, and we both walk inside the hospital.
Becks lifts her eyes to us, staring, scolding like we are two fucking kids fighting in the schoolyard and we've been sent to visit the principal's office.
At least that's how I feel, and Lucas doesn't look any different.
"Um... I... I need to clean myself up," I mumble once I'm in front of her, shifting my eyes from a scolding Becks to an embarrassed Lucas, hating me for escaping and leaving him behind.
I walk into the toilet again to wash, studying my blue eye and my split lower lip in the mirror. I smirk. "Just like in the old times, brother, just like in the old times."
When I come back to the waiting room, I see just Becks standing at the window, glaring outside, her thoughts miles away.
I walk closer and wrap my arms around her, planting a kiss on the back of her head.
She jerks in surprise and turns around, lying her palms flat on my chest, and placing her head on my shoulder.
"So, you two have finally made peace?" she asks.
"I hope so... Wait until I ask him Eve's hand in marriage," I devilishly smile, already planning not to make it easy for Lucas.
*****
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