A/N: Truth is by Sabrina Claudio is the PERFECT song for Maggie in this chapter. Please listen to it with this because it's *chefs kiss*
~
Maggie was terrified of the leftover feelings she had for James.
The way she rejected Tony and then Natasha's insight were more than enough to put everything into perspective. It was like she was finally forced to look into a mirror and she couldn't lie to herself anymore.
Running away, back to her roots seemed like the only sensible option she had left.
An entire week had passed, but Maggie still felt the same. Still keeping everything in. She and Rose spent most days at the house, tending to the garden and greenhouse. Accommodating for the recent change in season.
Spending time outdoors was more beneficial than Maggie realized. Working with her hands to help things grow in the sun was incredibly therapeutic. Enjoying the simple things in life. Brining herself back to Earth. Quite literally.
Although she was enjoying the time spent with her grandma, her hardened exterior stayed put. Never letting anything out about how she felt. Never talking about James, no matter how much Rose pried. She just wasn't ready. Knowing deep down that if she let any emotions slip out, they would never stop.
At night, she would often feel the tears creeping up on her, but she forced them away. Not letting a single one slip out.
Maggie was feeling exhausted from yet another rough night. Hunched over in the garden, cutting flowers for a fresh bouquet for the dining table. Making sure to pull a varied array of types and colors, lying them neatly in a wide wicker basket.
The sun was peeking over the horizon, illuminating her in soft golden rays. Soaking into her hair, kissing her skin. Melting away the dew from the grass. Birds were serenading her from the surrounding trees in a peaceful melody. She stood up with her basket full, taking a deep breath, letting the crisp morning air cool her from the inside out.
When she stepped back inside the house, Rose was chopping up some tomatoes for their breakfast.
"Look at that bundle." She gushed. "Beautiful choices, Maggie."
She gave a forced smile, moving over to the sink. Setting the basket down on the counter.
Turning on the faucet, she let a vintage vase fill. She snipped the ends of the stems while the water ran, ensuring they were the perfect length. Then, popping them into the vase, adjusting them into a perfect arrangement.
Rose poured some beaten eggs into the skillet, sprinkling the cut veggies over top. "Go lay down a quilt, would ya?"
Maggie set the vase down onto the dining table, turning to look at her. "Um, why don't we just eat at the table?" She suggested awkwardly, chewing her lip.
Although she had been doing breakfast picnics with her mom and grandma since she was young, they had turned into a tradition with her and James as well. A reminder she didn't want at the moment, stubbornly trying to keep from spiraling. Holding onto her stability by the skin of her teeth.
Rose gave her a confused look, noting that the response wasn't normal for her. She figured that there must be something behind it, so she didn't press the matter. "Sure, honey. Set the table for us then."
Maggie started pulling out utensils and a couple of cloth napkins from the kitchen. Laying them neatly down on the edges of the placemats. Moving the bouquet of flowers from the edge of the table to the center.
When she looked over her shoulder, Rose was waltzing over with a tray of food. Settling down at the table, she started unloading the plates between them.
Maggie hungrily scarfed down her veggie omelet and fruit, washing it down with a huge swig of coffee before Rose was even halfway through hers. Starving from her morning out in the garden.
She leaned back in her seat, staring blankly at the table. Frown softly pressed over her features. Mind swirling with thoughts of James. Unable to help from wondering what he was doing at the moment. She figured he was probably enjoying his weekend, maybe out doing something fun. Saddened expression deepening.
Rose caught the look, heart aching for Maggie. She wanted to believe she was getting better, but knowing deep down she wasn't the same girl as she once was. Her whole demeanor had shifted. Rarely showing glimpses of her sweet, bubbly personality. She always had the same lost look in her eyes and Rose knew exactly what was being hidden behind them.
"So," Rose started, trying to nudge her out of the pain she felt, "what do you want to do today?"
Maggie hummed as she took a sip of her coffee, thinking it over. "I don't really know. What do you usually do on Sundays?"
"Well, besides gardening? I go to the farmer's market." She stabbed a piece of her omelet, biting it off of her fork.
"Hey, that sounds like it could be fun." Maggie shrugged. "Let's do that."
"Okay, then." Rose agreed. "Why don't you go get changed and I'll clean up this mess."
Maggie gave a quick nod, then scurried upstairs to get ready. She took a long rinse, using all of Rose's handmade organic soaps. Taking the time to thoroughly wash her lengthy hair in the colorful mosaic shower. Something she had been neglecting with the depressed slump she was living in, but today was different. She wanted to feel her best.
She stepped out of the bathroom smelling of sickly sweet flowers, herbs, and honey.
Tying a cropped, knit top with a pair of loose fitting jeans, and some sandals. Keeping it relatively casual for their relaxing day ahead. She swiped on some light shimmery eyeshadow and brushed through her brows. Tying a silk bandana over top her hair.
When she made her way back downstairs, Rose was grabbing a few canvas totes for the market. Shoving them into a larger bag for herself. "Well, don't you look pretty." She cooed.
"Thanks, Mimi." She rolled her eyes. "Ready?"
"You betcha."
They made their way out to Rose's car. A yellow 1969 Volkswagen Beetle. The one she had since she was young. Never needing another car with how well she took care of it. Maggie jumped into the driver's seat before Rose could, speeding down the street.
She genuinely missed driving, but there was absolutely no need for it in New York. She didn't know anyone that owned a car. Except for— she shook her head, mentally crushing the thought of James. She was thinking of Steve of course. Right. Except for Steve. He had a car.
Focusing back on the road, she picked up her speed. Wanting to get to the market as quickly as she could. The more distractions the better.
Maggie pulled into a paid lot, a few blocks away.
They trekked down the sidewalk together. Maggie lifted her head, enjoying the bright sun and breeze. The weather felt perfect to her. A mild sixty-five degrees. A stark difference to the long, frosty winter New York had just put her through. Leaving her more than thankful that spring had finally arrived.
When they got to the Ferry Building, the market was booming with crowds of customers. Vendors were already set up in the booths, selling produce and taking cash. Although it wasn't the most exciting outing, Maggie was more than happy to be there with her grandma.
Rose led her through, stopping at specific stalls for certain items. The market was run by a nonprofit for sustainable agriculture, so it was mostly seasonal produce for the month. Avocados, citrus, mangoes, and broccoli. On top of that there were herbs, flowers, meats, and eggs. All locally sourced.
The entire building smelt fresh. Groups of families and friends pushed their way through, clutching bags of their hand-picked groceries.
Once Rose was properly stocked, Maggie took the bags from her, carrying the heavy load of fruits and vegetables on her shoulder.
They made their way to the Rose's favorite area of the market— to the breads, cheeses, wines, and jams. They munched on samples of everything, trying various artisan specialties. Chattering about which ones they liked best and purchasing them for later.
With the canvas totes stuffed to the brim, they marched outside, and back to the car.
When they got back to the house, they laid out their haul of goodies. Covering the dining table in fruits, vegetables, bread, cheese, and wine. Rose and Maggie got to work, putting some of it away, but leaving a few things out.
They made a charcuterie board together, piling up their perfectly prepped foods. Chopping everything up into bite sized pieces for them to snack on. Making a gorgeous spread of snacks for them to dive into.
Maggie poured each of them a large glass of wine, following Rose over to the living room and finding a spot on the couch across from her.
Curling her legs underneath herself, she started in. Munching on a baguette slice smeared in peach preserves. "Thank you for today, Mimi. I didn't realize how much I needed that." She spoke through her chewing, covering her mouth with her hand.
Rose popped a cube of cheese into her mouth, washing it down with a swig of her Cabernet. "Of course, sugar. I'm glad you're here, even if it is for a difficult reason."
Maggie smiled sadly, brows curved together, being taken back to the harsh circumstances of her visit.
"Shoot, I didn't mean to remind you of that." Rose shook her head, feeling bad about her choice of words. "I'm so sorry, honey."
Maggie waved a hand at her. "It's okay. I'm over it I suppose. Better off without him."
Rose nodded, appeasing her. Deep down, she felt the whole thing was silly. Albeit she would never say that to Maggie.
The news of what happened at the warehouse left her absolutely haunted for weeks and weeks, but the thing was, it made her appreciate James' presence in her granddaughter's life that much more.
He saved her from those terrible men. Risking his own life for hers. There was always going to be a slight uncertainty for Maggie's safety from now on, no matter if they were together or not. Better to have a strong, protective man around, she figured.
"Don't you think, Mimi?" She pressed.
Rose took a long drink of her wine, standing the glass back down. "I don't know what to say."
"What do you mean?"
"I know you, Maggie. I know this isn't you." She stared deep into her eyes. "I know this is harder for you than you're letting on."
Maggie frowned at her, then looking down to her lap.
"You can't lie to me." She gave her a warning look. "You're acting like someone completely different. I've barely recognized you since you got here."
"This is me." She shrugged, taking a sip of her wine. "I know I've changed a bit, but I can't just let myself be a mess all the time. I have a life to live. I have to be strong."
"You should be strong. And you are. But I'm seeing stubbornness, not strength."
Maggie's brows pinched. The implication of her words stung. It hurt to hear someone so close to her call out her bluff. Much like when Natasha did, outside of the club.
"I can't let myself give in." She admitted. "I know if I let myself feel everything, I'll never stop breaking down."
Rose sighed, mulling it over before speaking. "Right now, you may not want to feel anything. And you might never want to admit how much this has affected you, but you need to stop lying to yourself." She reached across the coffee table, grabbing hold of her hand.
"You're wasting time pushing aside the sentiments you clearly feel so strongly. If there is pain, tend to it. If there is a flame, don't snuff it out. Don't kill it to be cured faster. You're ripping yourself to pieces trying to hide what you're feeling. Trying to feel nothing, has left you not feeling anything. Don't block out the pain, because you're blocking out the joy you felt with it."
"What the two of you had was something else. I've never seen anything like it in all my years. It was beautiful. I want you to live your life how you need to, but remember that you and James had a once in a lifetime kind of love."
Maggie felt tears welling in her eyes, sniffling and blinking them away. "It's not that easy, Mimi. He ended things with me. He said he wanted me out of his life, breaking my heart and then he came right back around begging for forgiveness. I told him I hated him."
She rubbed her palms over her eyes. "No matter what he was saying, when I looked at him, all I could think about was when he said he didn't love me anymore."
"You and I both know that's not true. It never was. He loves you more than anything. What the two of you have is worth fighting for."
Maggie sighed, looking down to her lap. "I'm just scared he'll leave me again."
Rose nodded. "That's the thing about life. There are no certainties. It begins and eventually it ends. Death is a promise that is always kept. What matters is that we find meaning in the in-between. A series of die-rolls lay out our struggles and moments of peace. We just have to find a way to make the most of each and every moment."
Maggie sniffled, wiping away the tears on her cheeks. "But what would I even say to him? I've been so cold every time I've seen him."
"Tell him what's in your heart. If you lay it all out, he'll listen. And if he won't, make him listen."
~
A/N: I HAD to make Rose the person to finally break through to Maggie. She knows her better than anyone and knew exactly what to say because she's an iconic queen.
Also, it's my birthday today and I'm so happy I was able to post this soft lil chapter! So un-Scorpio of me to say that huh?