Today was a very different day at comic con. None of us were rushing to get ready. The hallway we were all staying in was silent. No one was making any nosie. It was like a ghost town. Very different for us all. We're a bubbly group of people and it's never quiet so it was odd. But there was a clear reason for this. The loudest one of us all was missing.
Elle was sat on her laptop still outside. Normally I would be concerned that she was out for this long but it was warm enough here in Cali so I was just leaving her to do what she needed to do. A few people from the management of CW and other legal type people have came and spoke to us all. I spoke to them on behalf of Elle as she point-blank refused to come inside. And when someone tried to go out to talk to her she closed the door so they got the picture.
She wanted to be alone. She was in pain. She was still healing from her fathers death and then her mothers and now adding her sisters to that healing process too. Her wounds most be wide open at this point.
There we already talking to us about the media. How we were going to handle all of this. How was the show going to continue. What was actually going to happen? I couldn't tell you becauseno one had any answers. We had to figure it out together but right now, people needed space. They needed time. No one wanted to write a statement for the media. we didn't even want to write one for the police but we had no choice to. We didn't want to address the fans. we didn't want to go online and pretend everything was okay because it was far from it.
Most of us now were sat in the hallway by our rooms. It was 1 o'clock lunch was just delivered and no one really ate much of it. We had a few bottles of alcohol and was drinking that. To numb the pain a little. To make it a little more managable to be awake right now. Elle still hadn't joined us and I don't think she will today. Paul was with her in the room. The two of them would be fine. But grieving takes time. And Time is what we all needed.
The girls stayed in our room again. They took my bed. Paul I and Elle took Paul's bed. And we actually got a little sleep. I felt myself holding Elodie closer to me. Scared if I didn't she's disappeared. I was worried that she'd do the same thing Nina did, because she was in so much pain. I didn't think it could get much worse from how she was with her mom's death but this was somehow worse.
The next morning we all sat around. Elle made everyone a hot drink. And we sat on the sofa's just looking at nothing. No one knew what to say or do. "Julie thinks we should post something on Social to 'announce it," Elle spoke up looking into her mug of tea. "You don't have to right now." "If I don't do it today, I've got to do it tomorrow. Or the next day and it doesn't make it any less real." She tells me softly. I nodded knowing what she meant.
The day felt like it went on forever. Probably because everyone was waiting for it to end so they could go back to sleep. Paul and Ellie struggled to sleep at night so it was a waiting game for when they were going to pass out from exhaustion and lack of food. They were both trying. They really were. When the cast came into the room, just so we were all together they tried to talk and bring a little sunshine into the room with an odd smile or laugh. But it was nothing compared to normal.
Paul was loud and hyper and annoying. But right now he was hollow. I looked at him and it was almost like no one was in. And Elodie, she's full of smiles and normally singing or dancing around the room. Especially on trips because she was so excited. She seemed lost. She looked around the room a lot. It was clear she didnt want to be here but she forced herself to stay to please everyone else. I guess convincing them she was going to be okay. But Knowing elle as well as I knew her, she was far from okay.
She was sat with Claire and Phoebe they had their own conversations away from the group mostly but that was nothing new. They're the type of friends that you'd expect them to have their own language. Sometimes when they talk I just look at them amazed. They don't even talk in full sentences, half the time it's just a string of words loosely connected and they each know what the other is on about.
We all crashed in Daniel and Joe's room it was the boggest. The floor was basically a gaint bed as we all pulled in blankets and pillows from the other rooms. It was nice being altogether. We sat all talking about what to write and post. We decided to do it all together. To stop just one person being attacked with questions. We were going to post and then turn our phones off.
(A/N Sorry for the short chapter)