𝐏𝐔𝐑𝐄 𝐇𝐄𝐀𝐑𝐓/𝟏.𝟐𝟎.
☆ CALM BEFORE THE STORM ☆
"𝓕𝓲𝓷𝓪𝓵𝓵𝔂 𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓭𝔂 𝓽𝓸 𝓪𝓭𝓶𝓲𝓽 𝓘'𝓶 𝓫𝓻𝓸𝓴𝓮𝓷?"
☆꧁*꧂☆
IT'S BEEN TWO days since the lethal virus assailed the hundred, mercilessly reaping its harvest and disseminating the burden of death. Blithe atmosphere reigned all over the camp as the rest of delinquents recovered from the infection and became healthy again. No more war moves from their enemies allayed everyone's shattered nerves. The silence ascended the spark of rebellion ardent in their hearts. Morales blossomed in calm before the storm, yet in awareness that they only won a battle. The conqueror of the war was still unknown.
Also, it's been two days since Allaia and Bellamy shared the intimate kiss in the butterfly meadow. Ever since they diverged in their paths after the return at camp, Allaia felt like a shadow of herself. She felt this emptiness devouring her emotions, morphing her feelings into somber nothingness. It was as if her spirit had abandoned her body, leaving a vacant shell behind, the solitary trace of her existence. The hollow in her soul seemed to extend under the influence of her conscience bereaved in guilt, caused by unintentionally hurting Bellamy. Allaia's traumatized mind supinely exploited the hell of her past on a ruthless replay, tormenting her in the cage of endless pain. Alle's wounds of emotional scathe left the invisible scars behind, telling the story of her personal fight with her demons.
All her activities were automatic; Allaia was drowning in numbness, in uneven rivalry with her nightmares. She vaguely isolated herself from everyone, submerged in her own thoughts, in a desperate attempt to defeat her horrors to brighten her future.
Bellamy discreetly watched Allaia from afar. His heart ached terribly at their distance, however, it was him who proposed it in the first place, so he didn't have any right to complain. This wasn't his intention, not in the slightest. Bellamy felt awful, seeing how broken Allaia looked — a faded outline of a person, struggling with the demons of her past, alone. She was extremely pale, with dark shadows underneath her eyes which lost their essential luster. It required a lot of self-control for Bellamy not to rush in her direction and console her in his loving embrace. He missed the innocence of her melodic voice and that sincere smile which always made his heart flutter in an odd rhythm.
Even Bellamy couldn't shield Allaia from her emotional wounds, no matter how badly he wanted to quell her anguish, but he knew she had to process everything on her own.
Allaia decided to join Octavia on the smokehouse duty, realizing that distracting herself from the chaos in her mind could have a benign impact on her mental health. In silence, the girls were hanging up pieces of meat, so they would dry before the sunset.
"Are you okay, Alle?" Octavia asked gently, unsurely staring at her. "You've been acting weird lately. I'm worried about you."
"I'm fine." Allaia lied, avoiding her eyes.
"Did Bellamy do something?" Octavia inquired uncertainly. "Because if he did, I'll talk to him and—" She rambled.
"Why does everyone assume that he's the one who would fuck it up?" Allaia snapped, her eyes widened afterwards. "I'm sorry, Tavy. I— I didn't mean to yell at you." She admitted shakily, smiling at her apologetically.
"It's okay." Octavia assured in a delicate tone, watching her intently with concern.
Del came in, carrying a pile of wood. "Let's get this party smoking." He grinned, dropping the logs into the fire, flames rapidly arising.
"You don't want the fire too big, so maybe just try to knock it down with some wet leaves." Octavia advised, skeptically raising her eyebrow at him.
"You get that from your boyfriend, Grounder pounder?" Del taunted mockingly.
"She's right." Murphy stated harshly. "A hot fire isn't gonna preserve meat as well."
"Well, if you can't take the heat, get out of the smokehouse." Del snapped angrily. "You should be kissing our asses for being allowed back in this camp."
"Allaia, your boyfriend couldn't get you a better job?" Murphy inquired curiously, glancing at oddly quiet Alle. "Anything would be better than working in the meat furnace. You too, Octavia?"
"He's not my boyfriend." Allaia muttered bitterly in response.
"Oh, probably." Octavia shrugged. "That just means someone else would have to do it."
A few minutes later, a smell of burning hovered in the air. Confused, Allaia wiped her sweaty forehead, glancing around herself in search for the cause of the unbearable heat. She cursed under her breath, seeing ascendant blazes widely devouring the wood. Flames flickered uncontrollably, hungrily reaching for anything that they could consume within to fuel their fiery wrath.
"Octavia, Murphy, get out of here!" Allaia shouted in panic.
Abruptly, Octavia and Murphy stumbled out of the alight smokehouse, but Allaia wavered slightly, almost collapsing onto the ground. Carbon monoxide began to fill her lungs as she coughed violently, the dark smoke stinging her teary eyes. Allaia's vision altered hazy, the fear paralyzing her senses, just as the wildfire aroused in intensity. Ardent flames hurtled in her direction, craving to absorb her, but strong arms gripped her waist, pulling her upwards and eventually, out of the burning smokehouse.
Bellamy rubbed soothing circles onto her back as she coughed up the noxious smoke poisoning her lungs. He watched her intently, undiluted concern aflame in his distressed eyes, as tides of uneasiness collided within. When Allaia began to breathe evenly, Bellamy's gaze fell to her soft lips, his mind vaguely summoning up the way they moved against his own in the ideal integrity. Allaia's thoughts meandered in the same direction as she glanced at his mouth dreamily, craving to feel his velvety lips on her own in a perfect harmony.
"Baby, hey, look at me, are you okay?" Bellamy implied nervously, pulling away from the alluring trance.
"Yeah." Allaia nodded shyly, casting him an awkward glimpse and subtly shrugging his hands off. Bellamy didn't protest nor appeared to look hurt by her coldness, realizing that she was just trying to maintain the distance which they agreed upon keeping for a few days.
"This is all your fault!" Murphy roared, furiously advancing at Del. He grabbed the boy by the collar and aggressively punched him in the face. "I told you it was too much wood!"
"Get the hell away from me!" Del yelled, attempting to strike back.
"Hey!" Bellamy hissed, struggling to get between two boys to end their fight, but eventually, he succeeded in pulling them apart. "Hey! Save it for the Grounders."
"Bell, now what the hell are we gonna do?" Octavia asked hopelessly. "That was all the food."
After the fire was extinguished, Allaia and Clarke approached Bellamy who was crouching in the debris of charred wood and cinders of burnt meat.
"Any idea what happened?" Clarke questioned curiously.
"Murphy says that Del kept feeding the fire. Mostly because Octavia told him it was a bad idea." Bellamy explained, rolling his eyes in annoyance.
"And we believe Murphy?" Clarke asked with a frown.
"I do, yeah." Bellamy admitted confidently, briefly gazing at Allaia.
"It's true." Alle confirmed shortly, blankly staring at the ash beneath her feet.
"We have some wild onions and nuts in the drop ship." Clarke stated. "It's only enough to last us maybe one or two weeks. What's left here?"
"Nothing." Bellamy replied bluntly, standing up. "It all burned."
"Then we have to hunt." Clarke resolved. "Anyone we can spare goes out."
The blonde tried to walk away, but Bellamy swiftly grabbed her arm. "With the whole Grounder army out there?" He inquired with disbelief.
"We can't defend ourselves if we're starving." Clarke declared.
☆꧁*꧂☆
"EACH GROUP TAKES someone with a gun." Bellamy instructed loudly. "But they're for killing Grounders, not food. We don't have the ammo. Use the spears for hunting. Get what you can and be back by nightfall. No one stays out after dark."
"Hey, Allaia." Myles approached her unsurely.
"Hi, Myles." Allaia greeted, adjusting her grip on the gun.
"I was wondering if— uh, you wanted to come hunting with me?" Myles asked timidly, staring at her with hope glimmering in his eyes.
Before Allaia could reply, Bellamy drew near them, "Yeah, not happening." He scoffed, sternly crossing his arms over his chest and glaring at Myles heatedly, causing the boy to walk away quickly.
"Excuse me?" Allaia hissed angrily. "Why the hell do you think you can just order me around?"
"No way, Allaia, you're not going out there." Bellamy stated firmly. "Right now, you have to focus on yourself and your health. Not recklessly go into that damn forest, especially not in your current state."
"What state, huh, Bellamy?!" Allaia snapped in irritation. "Finally ready to admit I'm broken? Or are you still gonna fool yourself? Because it's not worth it." She implied shakily, her frail voice fading with each word.
Bellamy sighed heavily, gazing at her with heartache afire in his distressed eyes. "You're not broken, baby." He pressed patiently, fuming with unlimited fury inside. "You're hurt. You were abused by the piece of shit who should've never even breathed in your direction. It's not your fault that you're going through tough time right now. I understand, angel. And I want to help you, so much. But you're not letting me. You just go into your shell."
"You're the one who wanted distance in the first place." Allaia mentioned, avoiding his yes at any cost.
"I thought it was a good idea to let you process things on your own." Bellamy sighed. "I was wrong. Tell me how do I fix this." Bellamy demanded gently, yet desperation was breaking through his delusively calm tone. "Please. I'm begging you, Allaia."
"Maybe there's nothing left to fix." Allaia whispered blankly.
"It's what that little fucker inserted into your brain. You're not broken, love. How many times do I have to tell you this?" Bellamy's voice cracked out of hopelessness as he observed her pained expression and eyes bereaved in reverie.
"Maybe until it becomes true." Allaia mumbled under her breath. "Okay, I won't go hunting. I'll stay with Raven and Monty." She promised almost silently.
Bellamy's tense posture relaxed significantly, knowing she would be safe within the camp's boundaries. "Okay. Good. Angel— I, uh, do you still want to stay away?" He inquired delicately. "It's killing me though, you know? I want to be there for you, always. But if you need space, I'll understand." He assured in a gentle tone.
Allaia hesitated, in awareness that her soul craved his presence, pleading to be intoxicated within the melody of his soft voice and these mischievious eyes in the hue of brown and gold —the colors mingling together, cascading an array of different shades throughout his alluring gaze. It tempted her, but Alle knew that she needed some clarity in her senses.
"I just need a little bit more time." Allaia admitted warily. "I have to think clearly."
"Do I intimidate to the point when you can't think straight when I'm next to you?" Bellamy hummed with a smirk, trying to flare up the missing sparks in her amber eyes.
Allaia only let out a humorless laugh, staring at him sorrowfully.
"Okay, you're not in the mood." Bellamy murmured with regret. "Noted."
☆꧁*꧂☆
STATIC AND DISTORTED noises crackling through the radio echoed inside the drop ship. Monty was sitting in the corner of the room, cautiously fiddling with something as Allaia sat next to him, straying in the clouds of her thoughts.
"I thought you'd be keeping me company, Alle." Monty spoke up suddenly, unintentionally startling her. "But you're so oddly quiet it feels like I'm alone. Are you... okay?"
"Yeah, sorry." Allaia cleared her throat, glancing at him with abashment. "Do you need any help? I hope you're aware I know nothing about all this stuff."
"Just don't make me feel like an idiot and say something." Monty laughed quietly.
"Got it." Allaia nodded with a smile. "So, any progress?"
"Nope." Monty told her. "I've been trying to decipher it for hours."
"Looks promising." Allaia mumbled sarcastically, staring at the black box from the crash site skeptically.
"Hey, a little more faith, please?" Monty asked.
Allaia smiled at him apologetically. "Right. Sorry. I'm not the most positive person in the world right now. You know, my period is getting close, so I can be a moody bitch." She admitted honestly, but partially concealing a lie of the fight with her demons veiled underneath the nonchalant attitude.
Then Raven barged into the room. "Hey, Allaia, are you... okay?" She asked carefully, casting at her with obvious sensitivity, and Alle nodded, sending her a forced smile.
"I found some good antenna wire for the radios. This guy was using it to fix his bed." Raven snorted. "You find anything else on the Exodus ship wreckage?"
"Yeah, data log." Monty confirmed. "You wanna hear something weird?"
Raven leaned closer, listening intently to writhen noises. At one point, they disfeatured into subdued voices, only to morph into distorted sounds once again.
"Sounds like an interference." Raven assessed with a frown.
"Wait." Monty protested. "It gets weirder. When the system hit, their nav system went nuts. They never got it back. And then boom. It's like something was jamming their signal."
"You think it was a sabotage?" Allaia queried with widened eyes. "But, who would sabotage the Exodus ship? There's no way it was our Grounder friends. Take a look at them. These dudes live as if it was the Stone Age."
"That is weird." Raven agreed. "It also makes no sense whatsoever, just like Allaia said. No. Pull the drive-in speakers." She demanded.
Monty glanced at her in confusion. "You want to strip it? We'll never find out why they crashed."
"We need every component we can get our hands on if we're gonna make walkies..." She trailed off. "And I need that radio."
Monty stood up abruptly, glaring at her in bewilderment. "No. No way. How are we supposed to contact the Ark?" He implied fiercely.
Raven flicked the switch off and an ominous silence hovered in the air. "The Ark isn't there. You're listening to a hole in the sky." She stated bluntly.
"Hey, my family is up there." Monty muttered defensively.
"I'm sorry." Raven looked at him with pity, reaching for the radio and pulling the wires out.
Allaia tightly hugged Monty in a silent support, and he leaned onto her shoulder in return. "It's gonna be okay, Monty." She whispered quietly and Monty smiled at her sorrowfully.
For a while, they sat in the drop ship, chattering about insignificant things. Monty was working on the technical stuff that Allaia had zero knowledge about, so she mainly kept him company.
Without even realizing it, Alle zoned out again to the realm of her innermost thoughts, inattentively submerging herself into the area of insanity inhabited by her wicked demons. Allaia has never felt so torn apart before, the fears created by the nightmares of her past were fighting against the dreams of her future. She was captive in the present, unable to determine the conqueror of this mental war. The irony of her struggle was amusing — she wanted to be loved, yet she was afraid of love itself. Her mind, scarred with the memories of abuse, begged to be fully healed, but her heart pleaded to be unchained from its cage of everlasting pain and experience the reality of selfless love between two lovers. Allaia truly cared about Bellamy, but there was this sinister voice echoing in her head, telling her about all the things that could possibly go wrong.
Eventually, Monty stubbornly ushered Allaia out of the drop ship, seeing how dazed she looked, bereaved in internal reverie. She stormed outside, inhaling the scent of fresh air in solace, the oxygen alleviating her shattered nerves. Vaguely, Alle glanced at the tent belonging to Bellamy in pure longing.
Just when Allaia was about to turn around and leave, she noticed Raven exiting Bellamy's tent in hurry, quickly throwing the jacket over her shoulder. What captured Allaia's attention the most was Raven's slightly disheveled hair and her creased shirt. Hastily, Raven rushed in the opposite direction, her features contorted in distress.
Allaia bit her trembling lip as her mind instantly allied all the dots, coalescing them into entirety. Faintly, she could hear subdued sounds of broken glass in a mute anthem of her heart shattering into million tiny pieces beyond repair. Her amber eyes seemed to carry a whole ocean as the smooth spheres rapidly rived and a lonely tear streamed down her cheek. Drowning in numbness, Allaia suppressed her genuine feelings, inherently concealing them as a defensive instinct.
Like a rose, Allaia formed invisible thorns shielding the fragility hiding underneath the surface.
She was aware that she didn't have any right feel this way. Bellamy wasn't her boyfriend. They only shared an innocent kiss two days ago in the butterfly meadow. They didn't swear any vows to each other, no substantial promises were made between them. He was free to do whatever he wanted and it wasn't her business, yet her soul was in excruciating pain, knowing he was intimate with someone else.
Why would someone like Bellamy even want to be with someone like her?
Just like Nixon told her, men have their needs, right?
This betrayal stung like an infernal fire, paralleling the ascendancy of flames burning her insides within. Disappointment combined with hurt glimmered in Alle's teary irises like silver marbles. Yesterday, Allaia told Finn and Raven about her past. This confession cost her a lot of pain; it was always exceedingly hard to recrudesce with thoughts to the hell of her memories of Nixon's abuse, but she realized that Finn as her brother had the right to know. He's reaction was very similar to Bellamy's — Finn was furious, sparks of pure rage shimmered in his eyes as he listened to her storms of sobbing while holding her tightly to his chest. Raven watched her with pity and compassion in a wordless support, assuring Alle that she could always count on her.
Then why would she do this to her?
And maybe all his loving words were lies. An illusion.
Suddenly Bellamy exited his tent, but fortunately walked in the opposite way to where Alle stood with the tears threatening to burst from her downcast eyes.
Murphy approached Allaia with a quirked eyebrow, seeming unimpressed. "Oh my, did Bellamy just hook up with Reyes?" He snorted with genuine disbelief. "I thought there was something serious going on between you two."
"Oh, shut up, John." Allaia rolled her eyes in irritation, masking her deep scathe underneath an angry expression written on her face.
"If you wanna get revenge on him, I'll be more than happy to help." Murphy winked at her playfully. "He'd probably murder me on the spot, but it'd be worth it." He chuckled.
"It's not like I'd ever sleep with you." Allaia scoffed.
"Who's talking about fucking, Allaia? I meant a kiss." Murphy countered with a smirk. "You only look so innocent, do you?"
"Fuck off, John."
☆꧁*꧂☆
"YOU FINISHED THE walkies." Monty stated, honestly surprised.
He and Allaia entered the drop ship, noticing Raven sitting beside the desk. Allaia walked across the room without acknowledging the girl, deliberately ignoring her presence, in high hopes to avoid the confrontation for now, until her unsettled emotions would subside.
"Hey." Raven said unsurely, her eyes tensely straying from Allaia to Monty. "I'm sorry about before, Monty. Really. And about your family." She apologized with sterling honesty, gazing at him with regret.
"Thanks." Monty said quietly. "So, all the hunters are back, except Clarke and Finn." Right on cue, Allaia frowned out of concern, innerly blaming herself for not realizing earlier that they were missing.
"Okay." Raven shrugged blankly.
"Raven, they were with another kid." Monty pressed firmly.
"Myles." Allaia whispered in an ominous realization.
Monty nodded. "They all left camp together."
"All three of them are still out there?" Raven queried incredulously.
"Yeah, we're going to look for them." Monty admitted. "Bring the walkies."
☆꧁*꧂☆
SENSES WERE ON high alert as the teenagers wandered through the forest in various directions, divided into smaller groups to cover more ground. Allaia insisted on staying with Monty, much to Bellamy's annoyance who tried to convince her to go with him, but she wouldn't agree. No matter how sweetly he implored her to, she simply ignored his existence. Alle even refused to look into his eyes, in irrational fear that they might exemplify the sparks of his rendezvous with Raven.
"I thought you said you were heading west." Monty muttered into the walkie, sharing an uneasy glimpse with Allaia. "Where are you?"
Cold breeze teased her exposed skin as she walked alongside Monty in the darkness, cautiously scanning her surroundings for any danger lurking in the shadows.
"Just keep the moon on your left and you'll find us." Bellamy barked in return.
Radio was quivering. "Is anyone else hearing this signal?" Monty implied.
"Just keep your eyes open." Raven demanded.
"It sounds like the same thing we heard in the black box." Monty mumbled in reverie.
"Dammit guys, watch out." Bellamy said firmly, causing Allaia to roll her eyes in annoyance.
Rustling of leaves in the distance captured Allaia's attention. Rapidly, she cast in the direction where the disturbing noises were coming from, letting out an erratic breath as a quake of fright overpowered her entire body. Allaia adjusted her grip on the gun with her trembling hands as she slowly approached the source of the sounds. She exhaled in pure relief when it rendered that it was only her vivid imagination deceiving her mind due to the lack of sleep. Nightly wind lifted the leaves into the air, tricking her with the illusion of delusive threat.
"O my God, Lai, get a grip." Allaia muttered heatedly under her nose, abruptly turning around, realizing that she was entirely alone. "Monty?" She exclaimed frantically, glancing around herself in worry. In amok, Allaia retraced her last steps, but to no avail. Monty was nowhere in sight.
The walkie crackled, nearly giving her a heart attack. "Monty? Allaia? Report! " Bellamy's strict voice resonated in vicinity.
Allaia's ears perked as she followed the noises, eventually tracing the radio lying abandoned on the ground. She swallowed nervously, reluctantly putting her emotions aside, and picked up the device.
"Bellamy?" Allaia called out, strenuously veiling her resentment and heartbreak caused by his betrayal with Raven.
"Allaia? Thank God." He breathed shakily. "What happened? Why weren't you responding? " He demanded with concern.
Allaia bit her lip nervously. "I— I don't know. Monty, he— He's gone. In one second, he was there, then I— I got distracted, and he was... gone. O my God, it's my fault. What if—" She rambled incoherently in panic.
"Baby, calm down. It's okay." Bellamy cooed gently. "Tell me what happened."
"I don't know!" She yelled angrily, her feelings prevailing in chaotic madness. "Don't tell me what to do!"
"Where are you, Alle? " Bellamy asked worriedly.
"Where am I? Really?" Allaia screeched mockingly into the walkie. "It's dark everywhere and I can't see shit, you fucking moron!"
Suddenly Allaia shrieked deafeningly when a hand locked on her arm and abruptly spun her around.
Bellamy.
"Don't you ever sneak on me like that again!" Allaia growled indignantly, slamming her fist against his chest out of rage. "You almost gave me a heart attack! And don't touch me." She harshly shrugged his hand off, inwardly flinching in disgust. Broken-hearted, she glared at his arm with sorrow.
The same arm that caressed Raven's body hours earlier with passion.
"Okay, love. I'm sorry." Bellamy frowned in confusion, holding his hands in an innocent act of defeat. "Let's head back to camp."
"What? Are you kidding? We have to find Monty." Allaia protested faintly.
"He's probably on his way back anyways." Bellamy told her. "Besides, we found Myles. He's hurt. Badly. We gotta hurry."
"What about Finn and Clarke?" She queried in concern.
Bellamy stared at her with hesitation gleaming in his worried eyes. "Myles said the Grounders took them." He sighed, afraid of her reaction.
Anxiety curled up inside Allaia's mind like an icy metal chain, causing her to wither. Bellamy's words nearly blinded her senses; pure panic arose inside her veins, conveying razor-sharp daggers straight to her soul. However, Allaia quickly subdued the fear raiding her heart, cloaking it within the cold facade.
"No way." Allaia resisted shakily. "I'm staying. Clarke and my brother are out there. I have to find them." She insisted.
"No, you're not staying here." Bellamy argued strictly, gripping her wrist. "It isn't safe."
Allaia torn out of his grasp rapidly as if his touch burnt her like a hellfire. "You're not gonna tell me what to do. I'm staying here and there's nothing you can do about it." She stated stubbornly.
"Really, love? If you don't want to go on your own, I'll just throw you over my shoulder and carry you back to camp in my damn arms." Bellamy growled lowly into her ear.
Like a sudden bolt of electricity, a shiver ran down her spine. "Fine. Fucking caveman." Allaia muttered angrily, rolling her eyes in annoyance.
"Only for you." He teased in a gentler tone.
And Raven, Allaia's mind chimed in bitterly.
"But we're going to look after them first thing in the morning." Allaia warned in a serious voice, glaring at him heatedly.
"Of course."
They began walking towards the camp in absolute silence, absorbed in their own thoughts as nocturnal sky somberly enveloped them in its embrace, as a promise of dark times befalling upon.
☆꧁*꧂☆
ＡＵＴＨＯＲ'Ｓ ＮＯＴＥ
Hi guys <3
So, drama time, huh? Come on, it's been way too calm lately, we needed some spice hehe.
What are your thoughts? I wanna know :D
It seems so that Raven and Bellamy hooked up. After the last chapter when Bellamy and Allaia kissed, it hurts way too much. Poor baby Alle :(((
Anyway, I really hoped you enjoyed this chapter! ♡
Stay tuned, in the next part Murphy goes crazy lmao
— love, selflessgirl07
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