Narcisa and Lucius rode in a carriage with some other 5th year Slytherin students. It felt weird being in a carriage with them all after avoiding them for so long. She knew they were nothing but trouble, but they were Lucius's friends so now they were her's. Crabbe and Goyle sat to the right of Lucius and Perseus Parkinson was squeezed in beside them. Then on the other side the Carrow twins Alecto and Amycus were at the end and then one of Narcisa's best friends Arielle Selwyn sat beside her.
Lucius chatted with his friends while Arielle made polite conversation with Alecto, knowing that Narcisa wasn't in the mood to chat. Instead Narcisa sat quietly, silently thinking about her year at Hogwarts as she often did during the carriage ride to the castle at the beginning of the year. She dreamed about what her year would be like, fantasized about running through the corridors with her friends dodging the ghosts as the ran. Her favorite thing to do was to trick Peeves, especially considering he loved to prank them during their early years at the school. They often imitated the ghost of The Bloody Barron the only person who could keep Peeves in check. Narcisa smiled as she thought about all her happy memories in the castle.
She looked down and seen the carriage was being pulled along by an ugly looking beast that Narcisa didn't know the name off. She wondered why nobody else ever seemed to notice them. Every year people would almost walk through them, ignoring their existence. She thought about how she would love if people would do that to her, ignore her existence. She would rather that then people part when they see her or be afraid of her. She wasn't her sister, they didn't even look that alike.
Since she never talked on the carriage ride she had never asked before but now her intrigue was too much. "What about those beasts pulling the carriages?" Narcisa said but nobody was listening, they were all stuck into their own conversations. The only person that heard her was Lucius who turned around as soon as he heard her speak. He looked between her and the beasts, confused. "What beasts?" He questioned, standing up to look over the edge of the carriage. "Them ones, pulling the carriage, they look like skeletons of horses. Can't you see them?" She asked, looking at Lucius in confusion.
Was she going insane? Could nobody else see these beasts? "Narcisa, are you alright?" Lucius asked, his voice taking on a concerned tone that gave Narcisa goosebumps. "Yeah I'm fine" she said, sitting back in her seat and wanting to drop the subject. "What's going on" asked Arielle who had been in deep conversation with Perseus before overhearing Narcisa and Lucius's conversation. "Nothing" Narcisa muttered quickly wanting to avoid drawing attention to herself and go back to day dreaming. "Can you see anything pulling the carriage Arielle?" asked Lucius, still trying to look over the side as if the beasts would be the size of his thumb. "No, they are pulling themselves as always" said Arielle, not even bothering to look.
Perseus laughed "You've all really thought all this time that the carriages were pulled by nothing" he continued laughing. "What are they pulled by then" asked Lucius, clearly being annoyed that Perseus knew something he didn't. He turned to Narcisa "They are called Thestrals love, you can only see them if you have witnessed death" he said in a know it all sort of voice. Lucius gritted his teeth. Anyone could clearly tell that they weren't the best of friends but Perseus was a good person to have around as he was book smart and helped them get out of trouble a lot.
Everyone was involved in the conversation now as they all turned to Narcisa. All their eyes asking the same question "Who's death did she witness" she could hear their eyes whisper but she looked away, towards the ugly beasts she had now learned where called Thestrals, leaving their silent questions unanswered.
"I wish people just couldn't see me full stop" she thought to herself, not making eye contact with anyone for the rest of the carriage ride.
When they finally reached Hogwarts after what felt like an age, Narcisa was the first one off the carriage. She hurried ahead and she heard leaves crunching behind her. Suddenly Arielle was by her side. "Hey, are you alright" she asked, putting her hand on Narcisa's back. Narcisa didn't want to talk about it, she never wanted to think about it again. Arielle clearly picked up on this and changed the subject. "Are you excited for the feast" she asked, clearly just trying to fill silent air.
That was one thing Narcisa couldn't stand about Arielle, she couldn't accept silence. It made her uncomfortable so she filled it with small talk which is one thing Narcisa loathed. Narcisa nodded, still staying silent. She wasn't in the mood to please other people this evening. If Headmaster Dipit himself had asked something if her this evening she would have refused him. Narcisa walked alone at a swift pase that Arielle was struggling to keep up with, Lucius and his friends were following slowly behind.
Narcisa's mood had been greatly affected by what Perseus had said while they were on the carriage. Her mind was no longer on daydreams of her future year or fantasies of memories she would make. Instead it raced with all the posible ways people could figure out her biggest secret, now that they had been given one piece of the puzzle. "Why can't I just keep my mouth shut" she thought over and over in her head.
Narcisa suddenly heard Arielle shouting her name. "What!" Narcisa snapped, turning around for a split second before being knocked to the ground. Arielle was the first one by her side before seeing a head of firery orange hair running her way. "I'm so sorry Narcisa" came the voice of the boy. Narcisa, still not being able to see straight, could take a guess to who it was who had knocked her over. "What the hell Weasley!" hissed Arielle, looking ready to take Arthur Weasley's head clean off his shoulders. "Sorry, I was aiming for Tweedle Dumb and Tweedle Dee" he laughed cocking his head in the direction of the Carrow twins who were now trying to keep up with Lucius as he stormed towards Narcisa. Arthur grabbed one of Narcisa's arms roughly and pulled her up. "You good" he asked, looking right at Narcisa now. Nobody ever did this, nobody had ever dared.
Arthur Weasley was a handsome boy, he was in Narcisa's year. He had a broad, good-natured face, which was weather-beaten and so freckly that he looked almost tanned. He belonged to the House of Weasley who were considered blood traitors by the pure blooded wizarding community, sympathizing with Muggles and protesting to their inclusion in the Sacred Twenty Eight. The Sacred Twenty Eight was a list of twenty eight pure blooded wizarding families and to be on the list was a privilege. A privilege that Narcisa had never cared for. Of course if she had been without it, then she would long for it.
It's not long before Lucius is by her side, attempting to do just what Arielle had been about to. The Carrows held him back, although they more than anyone enjoyed a good brawl even they knew it wouldn't be wise to do it here and now. Especially with so many teachers around, teachers who would have no problem favoring a Gryffindor over a Slytherin. Lucius sneered and spat at Arthur's feet as he put his calloused hand on Narcisa's arm. "You sure you're okay" he asked, ignoring Lucius "That was a hard knock I gave you". Narcisa felt the goosebumps prickle her arm where Arthur's hand was resting. Her stomach filled, for a moment with butterflies. She lifted her head, it had finally stopped spinning. "Yeah I'm okay, honest" she said.
Lucius had finally gotten away from the twins when he swatted Arthur's hand away "What did he do?" he asked, looking ready to kill Arthur at a moments notice. "I'm fine Lucius" Narcisa said through gritted teeth and a fake smile. Arthur seemed to sense her distaste for Lucius's attention and took this as his opportunity to slip away. When he was finally at a safe distance he called back "Sorry again". Narcisa couldn't help it, when she seen Lucius's face twist in anger she let a small smile creep onto her lips as she watched Arthur Weasley walk away.
Narcisa walked into the Great Hall with Lucius and Arielle by her side. She had a slight burn on her chest from the Firework Ball that Arthur had hit her with. Her eyes immediately drifted to the Gryffindor table, who were by far making the most noise. Arthur was sitting with his friends but he was paying them no attention. Instead he was talking to a group of young boys, the same group of boys she had seen at the train station. "How does it work" asked one boy, the one who James had called Remus.
Narcisa watched them as she walked to the Slytherin table. Sirius grabbed the weird contraption from Remus and started tapping it with his wand "What's the spell Arthur" he asked, concentrating on the block of colorful wood as if he suddenly possessed the power to do wandless magic. Narcisa stole a glance at Arthur's friends who were sitting on the other side of him. She seen them roll their eyes and she swore she seen one of them whisper "Not this again". Arthur took the cube from Sirius's hands and after a few seconds of twisting it around he had all sides of the cube the same color.
The young boys looked in awe and the girl that Narcisa knew as Lily Evans giggled. Arthur winked at her and started fiddling with the cube. When he was done all the colors were jumbled again. He tossed it in the air and all the boys dove for it. "We don't give Muggles enough credit" laughed Arthur as he turned back to his friends who all stopped whispering about him as soon as he turned. They all smiled politely but Narcisa could tell they didn't agree with Arthur's opinion. Nobody liked Muggles, not even mighty Gryffindors. Although nobody spoke up about how they truly felt, everyone liked to pretend.
"It's called a Rubix Cube, it's not that hard" Narcisa heard Lily laugh after showing the boys how she got all the sides of the cube the same color. Narcisa couldn't help but smile when she seen Arthur laugh at the boys reactions to Lily being able to figure out the complex cube. She suddenly realized that Lucius was staring at her and the smile dropped from her face but he had already noticed what she was smiling at.
All through the sorting ceremony Lucius didn't speak a word, even when Slytherin would receive a new member. He would just clap politely, for Lucius to be quiet wasn't uncommon but for him to just not speak at all was unheard of. Usually he would crack a joke or two at a new Gryffindor students expense or comment on how rather dull Dumbledore's speech was, but he said nothing.
Narcisa had a feeling that he was upset with her but she ignored this, she found problems were a great deal easier to deal with if she just didn't deal with them at all. But as she laughed with Arielle about how Perseus's nose had grown ten sizes over the summer she could feel a knot starting to form in the pit of her stomach. Was this what her life was going to be like from now on, worrying and walking on eggshells around a man she was supposed to spend time with everyday for the rest of her life.
With Narcisa's decision to ignore Lucius clear problem with her arose two possibilities. Lucius would either let sleeping dogs lie and get over whatever he was upset about on his own, or Narcisa may have to kiss her portrait on the Black family tree goodbye. She had been sent to school this year and her parents had just asked one thing off her, she couldn't let all the hard work her parents had put into this, into her, go to waste , she couldn't let her family name and reputation down. She had to ask Lucius what was wrong, but not now she would wait until after the feast, away from prying eyes.
Narcisa watched with a held breath as the Sorting hat was placed on her younger cousin, Regulas Blacks head. Regulas was Sirius's brother and one year younger then him, so was to be the first Black family member to be sorted after Sirius had been sorted into Gryffindor. Narcisa didn't want to think of what would happen if the same fate should befall Regulas. She thought her mother and father would definitely disown Sirius's whole family, including her aunt and uncle, Sirius's parents.
Narcisa could hear her mother in her head as she thought of it "Imagine the shame, imagine if our girls were sorted into Gryffindor. I'd have used their skin as wallpaper". She'd heard her mother say these words before and they still made her shiver to the core. It really made her realize how little love her parents truly had for their children and how all they cared about was status.
Narcisa was snapped out of her day dream when the Sorting Hat roared "Slytherin". Narcisa let out the breath she had been holding as she watched Regulas walk over quickly and quietly to the Slytherin table. He caught Narcisa's eye and waved at her, she seen a twinkle in his eye as he seemed to be excited to know somebody. Narcisa smiled weakly back, she was just so relieved that it was over. She turned her head slightly as to not draw any unwanted attention from Lucius, to steal a glance at Sirius. She knew that Sirius loved his little brother and that one of the reasons he had waited so long to leave was because of him.
Sirius felt that if he left then Regulas would receive the punishments that Sirius took almost daily. What Sirius hadn't realized is that Regulas wasn't like him, he didn't have the same sympathy for muggles or believe that muggleborns were just as much a wizard as they were. Sirius's plan was always to take Regulas with him to the Potters but he never realized that Regulas had never wanted that. He liked who he was and the path he was being set to fulfill was one he was excited for, and Sirius couldn't fathom the fact that Regulas wanted everything he despised.
If he didn't know then he surely knew now as his head was bowed over the table and James had placed his arm around his shoulder. Narcisa felt a pant of guilt run over her. "He's just a boy" she thought to herself. "No, he is a stubborn and selfish young boy who doesn't even know what he wants yet" said Bellatrix's voice in her head. Deep down she knew it wasn't true but she had to tell herself it was, so she didn't feel so bad, so she didn't feel like she was abandoning another family membership at one point, truly cared for her.
Narcisa knew that Sirius knew what he wanted more than anyone she had ever met. She knew he wasn't stubborn or foolish, he was strong and brave. He had the courage to stand up to the two people in the world who are supposed to love you unconditionally and tell them they were wrong. Narcisa envied his freedom, the way he could do whatever he pleased. The way he didn't get constant letters from home, not asking how Narcisa was doing but to ask for a progress report on the going ons at Hogwarts and that Narcisa was holding the Black family name to the highest possible standard. She envied the way he didn't have to care about the stupid expectations of his parents anymore. She envied the way he could wake up each morning and be happy with who he was.