“What are you doing for New Years?” my sister asked me as she danced in front of her full-length mirror in one of two dress options. It was already the last day of the year but Emma had known better than to ask about my plans before.
I wasn’t very fond of New Years Eve. Everybody got drunk and hosted parties and you were supposed to run around in a fancy dress and high heels. Maybe that was why Emma loved it so much. She enjoyed partying and her era of legal drinking had begun this year. I couldn’t count the time on my hands that she had come home drunk and felt hung-over in the morning. She loved dressing up and putting together an outfit and she walked better in heels than flats.
“I have no idea,” I said dismissively. “Why don’t you tell me about your party?”
“Well, it hosted by the agency and normally I wouldn’t be invited but Mindy and Brandi insisted and got me on the list.”
I had heard those names numerous times before. It was a set of blonde twins that were some of the hottest young models at the moment. Emma had hit it off with them exceptionally well.
“That’s nice,” I commented and scrolled through the draft of my new blog post.
“Which one do you think?” Emma asked and turned towards me. One was a classic little black dress and the other was mad of silver sparkles.
If it was for me I would have gone with the former option but in a lot of senses, Emma and I weren’t alike. “Go with the silver one. You’ll bedazzle everyone,” I said honestly.
Emma loved being the centre of attention and it would be difficult at a fashion party but she would definitely give it her best shot.
“Thanks, sis. I know you don’t like all this party on New Years Eve stuff,” Emma said and then paused with a thoughtful expression. “Is there a specific reason you don’t like it? Or is it just because people drink and party?”
I sighed and handed her my laptop. I had sat down just this morning to write a blog post about New Years. My blog had a huge following now, I had over a half a million reads every month, and it sort of terrified me. I trusted my readers but always blocked people that left mean comments. Mostly, they were my confidants and I didn’t just put up only photography posts anymore although my own photos always were included in every post.
New Years Eve
I now that it’s probably an unpopular opinion but… I don’t like New Years. People get too high expectations as if it isn’t just another day ending and a new one beginning. I don’t partake in parties and not even the one my parents hold every year. I’d be up in my room before 9 PM and just poke my head out the window when the countdown began.
As you know, I don’t drink and generally don’t do well around drunk people. They get too pushy and close and it makes me feel nervous. Everyone drinks at New Years and that’s fine, I respect that but I just don’t like it.
I think fireworks are beautiful but a waste of money and not worth the damages they cause every year. I don’t even want to look up how many people lose fingers…
I don’t mean for this to be an “I hate” post even if it seems like it is up until this point. I respect New Years and all of the traditions surrounding it. I love that it can inspire people to make changes for the better. I love that it can bring you back together with old friends. I love how at exactly the moment the clock turns to twelve we become one.
I never make plans for New Years as I just want to sit alone in my room (charming, I know) but I would love to get to know how you guys are planning to spend your New Years. Also could you list your absolute favourite and least favourite thing about this celebratory night?
Enjoy the array of photos showcasing various types of New Years Eves.
Emma looked up at me with an arched eyebrow. “You didn’t really tell them why you hate New Years,” Emma said and handed me back my laptop. “You should add that if you figure out why.”
I shrugged. I wasn’t sure I was putting the post up. I just wanted to make one and was truly curious to what other people’s plans were.
“I need to tell you something,” Emma said with a suddenly serious tone. My happy-go-lucky sister weren’t serious often and she instantly had me worried.
“About our flat…” she started.
I had kept pushing that to the back of my mind. I didn’t want to think about the fact that we had all of our stuff boxed up and ready to be taken away tomorrow.
“I’ve said yes to moving into Mindy and Brandi’s flat,” Emma said.
“Oh,” was all I could say.
“They really want me to help them get into YouTube and they’ll help me get some more modelling gigs. I really like those girls. You’ve met them once, aren’t they sweet?”
I nodded speechlessly. They seemed like great girls and I had seen their flat when I had picked up Emma from there drunk once. It was gorgeous.
“That sounds wonderful,” I said.
“What are you going to do? And don’t say that you’ll think about it later again. I don’t understand why you aren’t planning anything. You always plan everything.”
“Because I hoped that maybe if I didn’t plan anything else, everything would stay the same. I now it’s not logical but I don’t want not to live with you anymore, not to live here.”
Emma pulled me into a hug. “What are you going to do though?”
“Well, we planned that our stuff should go into storage for now and I guess we’ll have to do that still. I doubt that you can take all of your stuff with you. I guess, I’m moving back home for a while. It was nice being back for Christmas.”
“Abbey, that was Christmas time. That’s different. You remember how nagging mum can be if you’re with her all day. And what about Nate?”
“Obviously, I’ll travel to London and stay with him sometimes.”
Emma shook her head at me like I was mental. At that moment, we heard the front door open and Nate call out a “hello”.
“Speaking of the devil,” Emma mumbled and ushered me out of her room. She had to change out of her dress.
“Hey Abbs,” Nate said and kissed my cheek before handing me a hot chocolate. He looked around at all of the boxes.
“Moving tomorrow, huh?” he asked.
I sighed. “Not you too,” I muttered and then felt bad. He couldn’t know I had just had the same talk with Emma. “Sorry, honey. I’m in a weird mood.”
“That’s alright, babe. It’s probably just your New Years blues,” he said and guided me to the couch where we sat down.
“What do you mean?”
“You’ve been acting weird every time someone talks about New Years or 2014 ending.”
“You noticed that?”
“There’s not much about you I don’t notice,” he said chuckling. “I pay attention.”
“I’ve probably been rude not to ask what you’re doing for New Years then, so what are your plans?” I asked.
Nate started laughing. I had remotely no idea what he found funny.
“I’m staying in with you of course, silly.”
I shook my head. I didn’t want to ruin his night. “No, you should go out with your friends and party.”
“That’s the thing, Abbey. I can do that any night. New Years is only what you make it. I think you don’t like it because you feel like your tradition of staying in isn’t accepted as an option but you’re wrong. I think it sounds kind of awesome. Besides, it’ll give you an opportunity to say goodbye to this flat,” he said and put his arm around me. “I want to stay in with you because you have no idea how much I love doing nothing with you. I love how we can rant on for hours about everything between heaven and earth. This year has been the best of my life so far but it’s also been the most hectic. I’ll love to enter in wrapped up in blankets with my beautiful girlfriend.”
I stared at him while blinking numerous times. Nate sure was an odd guy. I had no idea how he could be the confident and funny entertainer on YouTube, the compassionate human that donated to countless charities, a friend and rock to lean on for his friends and the most loving boyfriend in the world.
“Even if you’re right,” I said. “My tradition isn’t your tradition and I couldn’t possibly ask you to change yours. I don’t want to change you.”
“Abbs, answer me one questions; you can only say yes or no. Have you changed your habits, your traditions and your approach to life since you met me?”
Of course I had. I had begun to spend time with him everyday and gained new friends because of him. We had created our own secret traditions, just for us. I had gained so much self-confidence and while most challenges still scared me, my first instinct wasn’t to back down anymore. Of course he had changed me.
“Yes. On all counts.”
“See? You’ve changed me and I’ve changed you. In my opinion, we’re changed each other for the better. I feel so content with who I am right now. I admire how you always have time for your family. I admire you determination when pursuing a specific photo idea that you’ll chase until you’ve captured it. I admire how you always give all of your spare change to homeless people. You’ve inspired me to take on those traits too. Mostly though, I love how you look at life and people with such optimism and you see beauty in everything and the good in everyone.”
“No wonder you speak for a living, you make so goddamn wonderful speeches,” I muttered and tried to ignore the fact that my eyes felt wet.
“I’m actually not done. Do you remember how I asked you to be my girlfriend and you said yes but thought that you already were?”
I nodded. “Yes, I don’t think I could ever forget it. It was nice to be asked anyway.”
Nate chuckled. “Well, I think you might have seen this one coming too then. I know you might think that I’m being stupid or silly or if you’ll say that it’s too soon. I honestly don’t think it is. Abigail Clover, would you please move in with me?”
I couldn’t figure out if I was surprised or not. I had had a feeling that he was going to ask for a while. I knew him well enough to know the signs if when he was planning something. My logical thoughts said that it was way too soon. We had only known each other for eight months. That was no time at all in the grand scheme.
However, he had been a permanent part of my life since then and I knew him so well. He had helped me through so much and helped me grown so much. I knew that he was good for me and I could never imagine being with anyone other than him. He had always been there when I needed him and he had shown me so many new places.
I knew his YouTube viewers would go crazy but surprisingly I didn’t care about what they thought anymore. I didn’t even care that my parents probably would yell at me when they found out.
I was done caring what other people thought. I wanted to live with Nate. We had grown accustomed to sleeping in the same bed already and did so six out of seven days. Still, it felt like a big step but it only excited me.
I realised that I hadn’t answered him yet but he was just watching me with a patient expression. He knew I needed time to process and he didn’t pressure me to give an answer right away. That only made me even more secure in my decision.
“Yes, I do think that it might be early but I don’t care. I would love to live with you, Nathan Chandler Hayden.”
He breathed out an inaudible sigh. He pulled me into his arms and kissed me.
After a night in with takeaway and snuggling up on the couch, I pulled out my laptop and didn’t even mind that Nate looked over my shoulder. He knew I didn’t like it and tried to be discreet but that boy was as subtle as an elephant in a porcelain shop.
I pulled out my draft and added a final section like Emma had suggested.
The most important part about New Years is spending it with someone that you care about and figure out your own special tradition. Maybe the reason why I didn’t like New Years (I’m actually warming up to the idea as I write) is because I’ve felt as if my tradition wasn’t publicly accepted. I was the loser staying in. I don’t really feel like that anymore. This has been my year of firsts and why wouldn’t it also be my first happy New Years Eve? Have a good one!
“Do you want to tell them about us moving in together?” Nate asked.
I shook my head. “We’ll keep that to ourselves for a while, if that’s okay with you?”
“Of course, I think that’s for the best. We were pretty good at keeping everything a secret in the beginning.”
“Yeah, I remember,” I laughed. “It was fun.”
“I like it better now,” Nate said with a big grin on his face.
“Me too and I have a feeling that I’ll like the future even better,” I said and kissed him.
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That's it. Feels kind of odd ending this book, but luckily I'm doing a sequel! Check the next part for the information. Thank you so much for all the lovely feedback, it means more than you know. I can't believe this book reached nearly 9,000 reads, over 200 votes and over 30 readers' comments.