KIM BONA
It's been a week ago that my life went so peaceful, perfectly normal and incredibly incredible like it ever did. I don't know what the hell I had done in the previous life, why has this one been such a literally awful like this? Seven days ago I was so fine and so in love with my brilliant boyfriend, and now it turns back to be screwed up again.
If I'm opening the stories from the middle, I terribly apologize. But everyone has to let me piss off about this. I can piss off...even though I don't want to but I have to, okay?
Here's the thing. Today went perfect and normal, but. There is But. The But that collapses every stories to be the unexpected way or it might be meant 'here they come, the obstacles.'
Alright, let's begin the shitty story right away and you'll see.
"What the hell is it about?" I nearly shout, pointing my tip finger at CL who is recording a song in the recording room.
"What's it? What're you talking about?" the manager of CL asks. I wish I could point the middle finger at the first place.
"You don't know about this, huh? How could you don't know? This is my song you're letting someone get without my permission!"
It's unbelievable, totally, extremely unbelievable. My song that I wrote for myself when I was in America years ago and never ever able to release as the actual mine but left it in my label's studio. And now one of them turned out crossing the world and became CL's song. If today I didn't come to YG building to work, I wouldn't have had a chance to know someone has stolen my unreleased song!
"Hey. Hey, Bona. Calm down. We officially bought it. I have the actual contract. You can't storm like this," he says, handing me a paper.
I study the contract paper properly, and I can't believe that he's right. The contract shows my label legally sold my song to be lawful YG's Entertainment.
"What? How could this be sold and no one even tells me?" I throw the paper on the table.
"I don't know. Why don't you just go ask your label? They sold this and we bought it."
"What's going on?" CL gets out of the recording room. "Don't you think you're raining on my parade, huh, Delansey Kim?"
I blow out my breath.
"You're singing my song without permission. I wrote it years ago and I'm waiting for the right time to release it as mine. You stole my song!"
"Hey. Hey. Hey. Please lower your tone. Your Korean boyfriend didn't teach you the appropriate etiquette of here?"
"Don't you dare pull him into this. I'm talking about my song! I can't let anyone have it without my permission," I half-shout again, and I think I'm already out of control.
"My label lawfully bought with our money, okay? And we even have the contract. Have you even thought about who you should exactly deal with but not us, huh? Go asking your label," CL scoffs.
"Yeah. You're stepping over the limit, Bona. You should ask your agency. This is none of our business," the manager adds.
"Let her go, Oppa," CL turns to her manager before narrows eyes on me. I hate that glare. "Even her boyfriend is cheating on her, she's still numb for this. And how could she ever knows about her music is sold over the world."
"What?" I echo.
She sighs sarcastically. "I'm so sick of biting my tongue already. He's still crawling back to my room, Kim. Aren't you hear me? Let's blow your head and see who is exactly a stealer. You are! You're stealing my boyfriend. Everything was perfectly fine until you came to this city. Get your ass out of here and back to where you belonged!" CL half shouts.
Her tone isn't too loud but it definitely is in my head. And I know from now on, her words will be stuck inside somewhere in my tiny brain, and I can tell they're not easy to get deleted at least a year.
I have a massive of self-doubt. Maybe all I'm doing isn't absolutely right like these two said.
"You were right. I'm sorry," I say and then do what I'm supposed to do. Take my leave.
* * *
I call almost every contacts of my agencies in America, but what I got are the robotic voices telling me to leave the freaking voicemail instead.
"Corden. I knew you stole my song! If you won't call me back within today. I swear to your freaking Lord. I'm gonna be haunting you for the rest of your life!" I darn my shitty CEO through the line.
And I dash myself into my mom's office. Mom fills me in that none of her teams knows about my agencies stole my song. What she informs me is her label's completely innocent about this.
Son of a bitch, Corden!
I take my mom's telephone calling my agencies. And again, they still turn their phones off. What a load of crap.
Alright. If they want to play the numb card, I'll play my card too. Let's see who's going to kick the bucket first. I quickly rip the official office contact from the internet before using Mom's telephone.
"Good afternoon from Corden Entertainment. How can I help you?" says a women's smooth voice.
"Emily. I know that's you. This is Delansey Kim talking with you. You'd better reach Corden right away. Tell him that if he won't call me back in a minute. I'm gonna sue and make him out from his chair. Oh! Don't forget to tell him who I am when I'm angry, though," I spit and immediately hang up the phone.
Less than a minute later Corden's name finally shows up on my screen's phone call.
"Running out of songwriters and began to steal your artist's song for selling?" I say as he is saying hello.
"Calm down, Kim. I can explain," he says with a little broken voice.
"You're so stupid, Corden. Did you even know that you sold my song to the label that I'm working? You're lucky enough that I still stopped them before they release it out. Take it back to me before I sue you!"
"Don't be too hard. Just hear me out. I know you're angry and I do know how irritated you are when you're pissed off. But listen to me, Kim. Let me have words with you first."
This is me. I know I'm stubborn and always do sloppy shit every time I'm out of control. This is the minor problem my therapist cares about. I stay silent and try to count 1 to freaking 10 mentally.
"Here's the thing, Kim. I do know you're the great songwriter I've ever had and I love your music as much as you do. But honestly, I'm not stealing your works. I just need money to run our label, okay? And I have told you a million times that I can't dare make an investment to pursue you. There's 50-50 percent of getting the profit to push you. I did tell you, you better stay behind the camera. You're good at producing but not the way you want in the spotlight."
Here we go again, motherfucker. Calm down, Daisies. Calm your ass down.
"But you should've even asked me before you sold it to someone else."
"I know. I know. But you know yourself too well. If I asked you, you wouldn't have let me do this. Plus I still give you a credit on it. You can even check out your name. I could give you the shares. Your songs load a lot of money for us."
"Wait....songs?" I almost fall. "There's not just my one song that you sold away?"
"...I...I thought you knew—oh, shit. I shouldn't have told ya." His tone goes suspicious and I hate it.
"You know I can sue you, right?" I threaten him as gripping fist tightly.
He half-chuckles. "No. You can't, Kim. This is a part of your contract with me. I can take every song you wrote to sell to someone else as long as you're in my label, remember? This is what the music industry runs. If you were at my point, you'd understand about how hard to push the un-outstanding-music artist like you, Kim. I'm sorry for being true."
I blow out my breath heavily. So this is how the world works, and I suck at catching it up.
"Okay," I simply say, swallowing.
"Great. That's my Kim. I'll talk to you later when you pop by. When'll you come to the building? I will wait for you."
"Maybe next week, you OK?"
"Sure. That's terrific, Kim. I'd love that." He sounds too wonderful to me.
"Yeah. And don't forget to drop me a resignation too. I'm done with your stupid music industry or whatsitsname, motherfucker!" And I immediately hang up, slamming the telephone back to its set heavily, and I totally got my mom off guard.
"So you heard it, right, Mom?" I pause, seeing her looking at me blankly. "I'm going to America next week."
KWON JIYONG
"Fuck you. Fuck everyone here. Oh, by the way, we do have the penthouse too. Just reminding if there's someone is seeking another way to put the fucking marijuana to the places we go!"
I spit in the middle of the staff and my bandmates, and then I take off going upstairs to my apartment. Does Daisies get home yet? I need her to calm me down right away. I am now lost the fucking temper already.
A week ago everything went so great and peaceful, but it is apparently the past tense. It's not anymore.
Am I opening the middle story? Oh! Sorry but shut the fuck up and let me piss off first because I can, although I don't want to but I have to, okay?
Here's the thing. Today, me and the boys just came to make a stage, rehearing for the promote our album at a TV station. But we were just about to, guys. It's time of the funniest point began. The police got a prank phone call that the TV station I am here is having the marijuana. And we thought it was just the really prank. Turned out it is not. The police came to break our stage and check out everything here including us. Then they found what they were looking for—a package of marijuana was in our fitting room again. And again with CCTV ain't work on. Fuck.
We went from the police station to examine and blah blah blah. And again we're clean. We're good but this time we have to stop our promoting and any works for a week until they're sure that we're really clean and they really get the criminal.
Fuck whoever is doing this to us. They ruin our reputation. We are supposed to have the immaculate record for our long-term history, not like this. Fuck!
So when I reach my apartment, I don't even mind myself for slamming the door so hard.
"I'm home, Ahjumma," I unemotionally half shout, walking straight into the kitchen where Ahjumma is making her dinner.
"Hi, Jiyong. Kinda early today." She especially sounds too wonderful to me.
"Yeah." I walk past her and grab a can of beer from the refrigerator.
"Are you alright?" And now she sounds kind of broken and it now fits for this conversation, I guess.
"Did Bona get home yet?" I ignore her question and knock a half bottle of the liquid into my throat.
"Not yet. Is everything okay, though? You look...terrible."
"Couldn't be happier." I force a lame smile at her.
Sorry, if I'm terribly such a jerk but damn it! My mood is somewhere under my boots—and I am still wearing them on. Too disturbed to give any shit. I bottom up the last half of beer and then throw it away.
Ahjumma is about to ask something more but I give her a wave as a gesture. Then head to the living room, dropping my heavy body on the couch and let the anxiety stay on, although I wish I don't want to. Suddenly, the sound of a cracked door comes on. I sit up straight.
Daisies is walking through the living room; looks like she's going to the kitchen.
"Hey, Dais—." I'm not finished yet, but when she glances at me, she immediately rolls her eyes.
"Fuck," she annoyingly murmurs.
What the hell that means?
"...what's with you?" I'm kind of surprised for what her ridiculous impression.
"Talk later. I'm not in the mood." She annoyingly shakes her head, taking off into the bedroom.
KIM BONA
I need a peaceful, quiet time for myself for a while. I need to get rid of my angry out before I might do something I would be regret later.
So I lock the bedroom's door and try to ignore what the world going on outside. GD's not supposed to be here right now. I mean, he can, because this is his place, but not get near me yet when I'm still out of my control. I even thought he wasn't home yet. Ugh! I should have gone to some bar or pub or anything but not the penthouse.
"Hey, Daisies. What happened. Open the door." GD knocks on the door.
"I said let's talk later. I'm not in the mood. Didn't you hear me?" I sigh, dropping my heavy body onto the bed. I wish I could have a can of beer in my hand right now.
"What was that? Open the door, Dais."
I stay quiet, staring blankly at the ceiling.
Sometimes I have to realize that better be numb than spit every word—which I already know it wastes time for who never listens.
GD stops asking for letting him in, and less than thirty seconds later he unlocks the door by his own key.
"Great. I forgot you own this place." I frown like him and get to my feet.
"What is wrong with you? What was that? You see me, rolling your eyes, locking yourself. Why?"
"Please leave me alone. I don't want to talk to you right now. I'm out of control when I'm lost my temper."
"Tell me what's going on. Who got you in trouble?"
I sigh. "Could you please just leave me alone for a second? I need to calm myself down."
"And you'd better fill me in first about what the hell is wrong with you. What did I do, why you act like you hate me?"
"I don't hate you...well, maybe I do now."
"What?" He gets closer. "What do you mean? You hate me?"
Crap. He opened my gate. And I'm perfectly lost my temper by now.
"Yes. I hate you and I hate that bitch, CL."
"CL?" he repeats. "What's with her? Have you met her?"
"Yeah. I stopped by the studio. And I just found out that my agency stole my songs over the world and one of his client is that bitch, CL."
"What? Really?" He seems shocked. "Is that true? How that happened?"
"I don't know. I was asking myself over the way home, too."
"Did she know it's yours? Did she ever say anything to you?"
"Sure. She told me everything. Oh, and she did tell what I already knew it was gonna happen between you two, too."
He is stunned for a moment—processing himself. Then he sulkily sighs, holding his temples. Looks like he just recognizes what it is, too quickly.
"What the hell did she say about me?" He tiredly asks and puts his hands on his hips.
"And what do you think she'd say?" I scoff. He knows what he did and I don't want to repeat.
"I don't know. You tell me. Maybe what she said was just a lie."
I sarcastically chuckle. Okay. So let's see if this is just a lie "Are you still goofing around her place?"
And I see he drops his lip for a brief second and gets back to normal in the same time. I hate to admit that his reaction already shows me the answer.
"Yes," he finally admits, swallows harder.
I grip my fists beside my hips.
"Yes, I did go back to her room. But it was just weeks ago when we broke up. That was when broke up, remember?" He reminds me.
"Oh, yeah? Just days ago when we were broken up. Moving on too fast, huh?"
He exhales sharply as staring at me. "There was just one time, Dais. But I swear, me and her never are a thing."
"A thing?" I repeat. "Can you explain me a thing you mean is like the rebound relationship?"
"We're never together."
"I'm not finished," I say, holding hands on my hips. "A thing you meant might be called friends with benefits, right?...tell me last times you came through her, you didn't even sleep with her?"
"...sort of," Blah. "But I swear nothing really happened."
I half-laugh. "Sort of? Sort of a thing like 'you licked her pussy, she sucked your cock' like that?"
I then take off the ring and throw it against his stomach. And when the ring is dropped on the floor next to his foot as the gravity thing and that moment I just realize this is too much.
GD astounds for a moment. He's staring at the ring on the floor stunningly. I just wish I didn't do this.
"You were right, Dais. You're really out of control when you're lost your temper." He looks up with a pathetic look. I hate that his eyes apparently show that he's really sad with this.
"I'll tell you what, Dais. I couldn't even sleep with CL. Yes, I did run into her and meant to fuck her to get you out of my head. But I couldn't. I was kissing her and your face showed up. And that's all, I came home then. I even almost went upstairs, kneeling down in front of you and saying 'I'm sorry, I don't wanna lose you'. But in fact I couldn't...you asked me to stop and I stopped. I didn't want to pull you back where you were uncomfortable. I just had to tell myself, if I really love you, if I really care about you...I should let you move on."
"...I just hate the way she constantly is the only reason I can't be sure about you," I admit. Looking down. His words and tone inform so much things. I can't look into his sad eyes right now.
"You never trust me, do you? For the whole time, I've shown you. Even last week, you just told me you trusted me. It seems like a bullshit word from you. Even the way you say you love me is a bullshit, too, right?"
"No!" I quickly argue. "I love you. I really do. How can you think like that?"
We stare at each other in silence for a moment. He presses his mouth together like what's going to say next is too hard to say. But he has to spit it out, anyway.
Because it is the unbiased truth.
"Because you don't really show me that you love me, Dais. Sometimes I see you do but sometimes I don't. You're the person who keeps everything into yourself. You have so many walls around your sides, and it's not easy for me to climb into your world." And he pauses. I hardly bite my lip, tear gathering around the corner of my eyes, and I'm telling myself to not fall them down but I barely can.
"You know what? I don't wanna say this but you're making me wonder either you're really in love with me or you're just in love with the feeling," he says before grabbing a coat from the hanger and takes his leave. I can't help but follow him.
"I'm sorry, Oppa. I wasn't myself," I say, looking at his back quickly getting farther from me. "Where're you going?"
"Out," he carelessly answers without even looking back, pulling his arms into the sleeves of his coat.
"When do you come back?" Maybe he wants silence like I wanted. Maybe he needs time to calm himself down like me. I don't know how long he'll be gone, but I will be waiting for him no matter how long he's going to take.
He opens the front door, holding it, and then turns to me. "I don't know. Maybe I will not come back ever again. I'm tired to climb any walls." And then he pulls himself out and slams the door hardly in front of me.
.
.
.
I turn around from the door and go back picking up the ring I just threw and wear it on where it was again. How could I throw it against him? How could I throw his loyal heart away?
I slightly slide my back against the doorframe of the bedroom, bursting out tears, and hold the ring tightly.
Again with the damage of my uncontrollable mood. You may say I am the worst main character of this story. Maybe Corden would be right about me, not just being behind the camera thing, but I should be behind of everyone. I'm not supposed to love and be loved. I'm screwed up. The fact that whoever runs into my life, I constantly never let them stay but make them leave eventually. It feels like my life was a movie in some theater, people come to join the story of my life as they see the trailer is interesting. But in fact that apparently my story has never been too long and never gets kind of funny one. When my movie ends, the audiences immediately jump up from their seats, raising the middle fingers and saying 'your movie sucks' and then they go straight into the exit door, review to their friends to not ever waste time watching this awful story. The fact that I don't want them to join my story. I just want them to company me. But I'm such a jerk at letting people company. I just let them watch my little—tiny sucked story, and beat them hate it until they actually leave.
GD is the first person who makes me feel I deserve to live in this world, and I just let him go. Now I really need Hermione Granger's time-turner. I want to go back where I first met him and I could save our relationship again. If I could do this, I swear I'd never want any more company. All I need is him for the rest of my life.
"Bona. Are you alright?," Ahjumma seriously asks, kneeling down next to me. She cups my wet cheeks and carefully wipes them with the edge of her sleeve. "I heard you two having words fight and I worried about you."
"I made him go. I'm sorry." I'm sobbing.
"It's okay, honey. He's gonna be back," she says, holding my shoulders into her chest.
"No, Ahjumma. He said we will not come back again...he's tired to climb my walls," I sniff against her neck.
She gently rubs my head. "And why don't you put your walls down? Don't you love him?"
"Of course I do. I really love him, and not just the feeling. But I love all about him. Everything, every details of him."
"And did you ever let him know that you really love him? Saying 'I love you' can't even compare to the acting, you know that, right?" She puts me sit straight and looks directly.
I shake my head as an answer.
She clears her throat and looks at me in the eyes. "Well. I'm just a maid. I shouldn't get into this kind of your stuff. But all I could tell is...this is how the obstacles of love be. If you really love him, you have to show him that you do. Though you will say you love him but you don't do anything, it'll be just a stupid speech,"
"The way you do is more important than you speak, Bona. You have to let him see that you really fight for this love and you're the only one who suits to own his heart."
"And what do I do? He left."
"I can't tell you how you should do or not to do, honey. You have to decide it. It's your love,"
"Just ask this." She points at my chest with her most honest grin.
Fight for this love?
How have I ever shown him without speaking?
It's true like GD and Ahjumma said. Except from spitting the words, I never do anything for him. I never show.
Alright.
"How long he's gone?" I immediately jump to my feet.
"I...er...I don't know. Five minutes, I think." Ahjumma seems surprised when I swiftly stand up, almost got head rush.
"Oh, gosh. Can't believe I lost five minutes. Thank you so much, Ahjumma. I have to go now. He might still not go yet."
I quickly put the whole energy into my bare feet, and speed them running down the hallway till the elevator. And I can tell I never ever feel the elevator took my time so long like this before. Whoever is using it, please get out of my way first. I need to catch him before he leaves and never gets back again like he said. He has right to go but he doesn't if he doesn't see the power of love from me yet.
The fact that for my whole life, I never beg anyone to stay. If they want to leave, please do. I'm not going to pull them back. How could I drag them down to stay if they're uncomfortable and tired of this relationship?...but when it comes to him, I couldn't really let him go. Whoever could leave me, but he cannot
I bite my nails, keep jogging all the way down. It seems like four hours in the elevator until the red glowing tiny screen shows 'B' floor. When the door gets wide for around a few centimeters, I immediately shove my shoulder outside so that I can get out of it before it takes any widen. There's the parking lot floor. And I can hear the engine of a car starting and it sounds like it's moving out. I glance around and then I see a super car of GD; black one, is driving farther to the gateway.
No any doubt to consider anything. I engage my bare feet and run after GD as long as I can.
I keep running along his car which is getting too farther and farther from me up into the street. I yell 'oppa.' with a sputum in my throat, and that makes my voice goes too low to catch him.
"Oppa," I shout one last time with tears before his car gets out of my sight. I'm standing at the front yard next to the gatekeeper.
"You're okay?" he asks with his puzzled look. I nod and give him an honest smile as much I could do, even if my tears still sliding down. He expresses an curious looks. And I bend my head down for him a little and walk back to the parking lot in the penthouse.
When I pass two steps from the gateway, I immediately slide down, folding arms round shins and shove my face down into my knees.
He really left.
I can't pull him back. I couldn't have a chance to be able to make him know how much he means to me. I couldn't hold anyone back and stay for all of my whole life.
In fact, There's no Hermione Granger's time-turner or even a time machine in Nobita's drawer either. You can't go back to fix whatever you've done. If you want someone to stay in your future, you'd rather never make anything that you will regret later. And that's how fucked up my life is. I have done everything that my future self will be crying and blaming for all of screwed-up things my past one did.
I never make a good job, nor do I make myself proud. Flashback to the very first time with GD, and I realize I did what he really told me. To fuck everyone off. I really did...excluding him who was an angle for me and he deserves to take everything for what he did. If he really won't be back again, I swear to whatshisname that I never walk in this city again. How could I live in this place without hearing the vibe that screams his name?
What would I do if I never see him around again?
How would I live in this world alone when I already get used to having sincere company?
KWON JIYONG
I lean my forehead against the door, feeling guilty after slamming it too hard in front of her. Was I being too much? Did I say too tough than I was supposed to? Blah.
But she did throw the ring that I gave her at me. And that moment, I was lost my mind like she was. Probably we still are. Fuck. I shouldn't have told her that I won't even back here, nor do I spit the awful words about inlove-feeling things. I actually didn't mean to hurt her but I couldn't watch out my tongue then. The way she threw the ring, my mind then got lost.
"Fuck." I leave the doorknob that I wish I could twist it and come inside. But I won't.
Maybe I was wrong that I yanked her when she already said she needed time alone for herself. Maybe we have to respect our own problems before we get fighting about our stuff. Maybe both of us need silence...
I take the elevator down to the parking lot in the basement. When I get down there, my black supercar is parking in the middle of the parking lot, also its engine is starting. And there's Fucking Seungri about to get into my car.
"Excuse me, sir. Can I borrow my car to go outside?" I say, and he immediately jumps up in surprise.
"Hyung. I thought you'd be with Bona all night." He rubs his neck shyly. "Where're you going?"
"When did you become a bossy and a car stealer?" I can't help.
"Sorry. I just wanna get drunk, you know," he says, shrugging his shoulder, and I understand him. We all are still upset with the marijuana thing that happened today.
I nod, patting his arm. "I'll go with you."
"No. No. No. You can't." He swiftly pushes my shoulders away.
"Why? Isn't this my car?" I raise my eyebrows and point at my most expensive vehicle.
He nervously chuckles. "Yes, it is obvious."
"Uh-huh."
"Oh. What about your girlfriend, Bona. I saw she came back already. Won't you hang out with her?"
"That's the reason I want to leave....well, just a while."
"You guys were fighting?"
I sigh. "None of your business."
"Hey. C'mon, Hyung. You can't leave her. She's with you. She's in your charge."
"Why can't I?" I challenge before adding. "Plus, she has her brother here. She's not alone."
"Hyung. I'm serious." He squeezes my arm. "I think you're still upset with the drugs. I am too. But you can't goof around like I do. You need to stay with her."
"And what do I do? She was too psychotic." I irritably brush his hand away. "Besides, she did throw my ring at me. If you were me, what would you do?"
He drops his mouth, shocked.
"What? She threw the ring you gave her? Did she know it costs an arm and a leg for 29 million ₩?"
I roll my eyes. "It's not about the price. It's about how she could throw it at me."
"Oh. I'm sorry, Hyung." He pauses. "But you two are already living together. It's something like a marriage thing, you know? If you're having a fight, you need to deal with it and move forward together. You can't run away. Besides, my Hyung never runs away when he has a problem. He fights for what really matters. And I see this woman is one in millions that literally matters to you. I've never seen you being like this before. This is really not you."
I sigh, rubbing my temples. Seungri pats my shoulder gently.
"Stay here, okay? You're upset. Maybe she is. Just try to do your best," he comforts and I unenthusiastically nod.
"So. Can I borrow your car then?" He claps hands together with a half-grin. "Anyway, if you won't let me to. I'm afraid that it's already too late." And he awkward eyes me inside the car coyly.
I raise my eyebrows confusingly and bend toward to follow his gaze until I see a hot girl with big boobs, sitting leg-crossed in a shotgun. She's totally surprised when she glances at me and covers her mouth as gives me a hi gesture.
Seungri's shyly poking his index fingers together. I annoyingly wave for him while rolling my eyes.
"Thank you, Hyung," he happily says and jumps into my car. I step away and lean myself against the post nearby.
As Seungri is driving my car away to the gateway, all of the sudden I'm hearing footsteps running with a yelling 'oppa' behind me. I'm staying behind the post until less than a second later I see Daisies is running past me.
Is she running after the car?
"Oppa," she half yells as running after Seungri—well, I literally don't think so.
She is running after me...with...ur...bare feet. She thinks I'm driving that car. I watch her crying and also running to the front yard.
She really thinks I left her?
I can't believe she would actually do this. I ran out of words, but sweep a water around the corner of my eye away. To be honest, I've lots of experience about having girls run after me throughout my whole career, but this time is truly, completely different. Very different. It's so emotional and sentimental that nobody would understand except us.
Oh, my God. That's all I can say by now. I'm perfectly a loss for words.
I am still standing behind the post while watching Daisies despondently walks back crying into the parking lot. When she passes the gateway for few steps, she slides down hugging her legs, crying.
She looks too deep even though she isn't crying out loud (because she's not even kind of a weak person), I can tell she's really plaintive as if I wouldn't really go back. Well, I did say that to her. But how could she believe that? How could she run after the fast car and think that she would be able to catch up? And apparently her legs are still not hundred percent good-working since she fell from that stairs.
Well, those stairs...let's guess who made her fall from it. Obviously, me again. She was dreaming about me. I've hurt her so much including her physical and mental. What a jerk I am.
I use my hand to sniff my nose before walking straight to her. She looks up when she probably hears my footsteps. And when her eyes meet mine, her face turns to shock. She's still crouching frozen. She never even leaves eyes on me while I'm kneeling down in front of her. My stomach brushes a little bit when I glance at her finger has the ring on.
She's got all of red face—her red eyes, red wet cheeks, a red nose, and a red natural lips. She looks want to say something. But as I read her look, I think she's still the way of shocking.
"How could you wrap from that car?...weren't you driving? Is it...isn't it...isn't it your car?" she stutters, pointing backwards above her ear.
I half-chuckle. "You wish."
"No, I don't," she innocently says as I wipe her cheeks.
"Why did you run for if I were really there. What did you do if you really stopped me, Dais?" I honestly ask, taking my palms between her face.
She sniffs and I wipe her snot out with my thumb. "I thought you were really gone. I don't wanna lose you before it's too late." And she pauses, staring at me. "I just want to say that I am really sorry...please give me a chance to show you that I really love you. I don't love you just because of the feeling....I love all of you, Oppa."
"I saw it. I really get it, Daisies. Please get up," I honestly command and try to help her get up. But she won't let me.
"No. No. I'm not finished. I am sorry for everything, Oppa. Let's begin again. I can't let you go. I really can't."
The way she's sobbing breaks my heart like mad. It's literally the last thing I want to see her crying. It's really too pathetic.
"How did you think I can even leave you?" I half say as my throat is full of water inside, including the corner of my eyes. I pull Daisies to her feet and hug her.
I can feel her leg a bit shaky and I instinctively tighten my arms around her, just in case she might fall down.
"Because everyone in my life keeps leaving me, even though I'm such a jerk. But when it comes to you, I really can't let that happen," Daisies says through my chest.
"I never think I will ever leave you. I said it because I was just exhausted, too. There are lots of going on in my work. I'm, too, sorry," I say, kissing her blonde hair.
Her head pops up. "What's going on?" she asks confusingly while her tears never stop running down.
I half-chuckle, sweeping tears away from her gorgeous face. "Nothing. Just being found drugs again. And now I have no schedule and I'm being grounded in this city for a week."
"What?"
"See? I was out of control because of my issues, too. We're even then."
"How these drugs happened to you again?" She seems curious and worried about my current issues than the way I say even.
"Dunno. Let's forget about it." I plant a soft kiss on her lips. Rubbing her cheek is my happiest thing I could die for. "I don't mind, though. I'll be stuck with you for a week. That's all I matter," I say with a grin.
She steps back a little, holding my hands to her chest. "And next week, will you be available?"
I raise my eyebrows, confused a little.
"Why?"
"I need you to go to America with me, Oppa."