"Momma momma!" I heard Kaleb yelling for me from somewhere in the house. I chuckled as I grabbed the plates of food and making my way back into my room.
There sat Ella holding Kaleb by his wrists. "What're you doing?" I asked curiously as I sat the food down beside her. Kaleb's bright eyes met mine and his face lit up like a Christmas tree.
"Momma!" He tried to wiggle out of Ella's grasp but she wouldn't let him.
"Kaleb sit still," she demanded. "You're gonna ruin the nail polish."
"Did you paint my sons nails?" I ask. She smiled sheepishly at me as she turned Kaleb around to face me.
Kaleb squealed and held out his hands, smiling widely, "momma! boo! boo!"
I looked at his nails which were painted blue, I assume 'boo', is 'blue.'
"Aw baby, they're so pretty," I coo. "You can paint your nails whenever you want buddy. Come here."
I laugh as he stands right in front of me, I scoot back, and grab his hands to gently blow on them. He laughs and tries to wiggle out, but I don't let him. "I'm trying to dry these faster baby. Hold still."
He complies but keeps his little smile on his face. I turn to look at Ella who is painted her nails purple. Her favorite color. "Cute color. Are you gonna paint mine?"
She looks up at me and smiles, "what color would you like gorgeous?"
My cheeks heat up as I swallow down the butterflies fluttering in my stomach, "Do you have red?"
She nods, "I'll do them after mine dry okay?"
I turn my attention back to Kaleb who is watching the television intently. I lightly tap the nails, seeing they're dry. I let him go and he smiles and goes for the food I brought. I laugh as he grabs a crackers and starts trying to eat it. He grabs the juice box, looking at it quizzically.
He comes over to me and Ella and holds it out, I place the straw in and hand it to him, "don't squeeze it." I warn him. He plops down on my lap and I hug him to me. He's getting bigger. I frown at the thought.
"You're a good mom," I hear Ella say as she does her last nail. She looks up at me and smiles, "I really like seeing you guys interact. It's the sweetest thing."
I smile and thank her. "Did you think I was a whore?"
"What?" She asks, her eyebrows furrowed.
"You said you always heard crying and I'd hang up the phone before we met. So I assumed you knew I had a kid, you just didn't say anything. Did you think I was a whore?" I covered Kaleb's ears again. Earmuffs children. Bad language about.
She frowned, "it never crossed my mind. So no, and I still don't think that."
I nod my head and bite my lip, "do you like kids?"
"I mean.. they're okay I guess. I like some, how about that. Kaleb being one of them. Just some are annoying and I can't stand them."
I nodded in understanding, "Some can be a handful, and really annoying. It kinda just depends on who the parents are and how you raise them."
"You're doing a wonderful job with Kaleb," she says. "He's a good kid."
"He's only one too. I'm excited to see him grow up, but you know, at the same time I want him to stay little forever." I brush his hair to the side.
"Are you gonna want more kids in the future?" She asks randomly after some silence.
"Oh for sure. I'll take at least one more. But I don't mind having more. I guess it depends on who I marry." I shrug. "What about you?"
She furrows her brows, "I'm not sure. Maybe a few," she states. "I'll just have to wait and see. I'd love anything that was made by me and my partner."
I smiled slightly as images of Ella pregnant floated into my mind. Weird.
I notice Kaleb fell asleep so I go and take him to his crib. When I get back in my room, Ella is shaking the red nail polish.
"You ready?"
I nod and sit in front of her. She takes me hand gently and starts painting my nails. Having other people do that kind of tickles.
She finished my nails and got up to lay in bed. After they dried I got up and crawled into her arms.
Resting my head in her crook, I placed a chaste kiss on her neck and wrapped my arm around her.
"Can we just stay like this for a while?" I whisper and close my eyes.
"Of course. Anything you want," Ella said and wrapped her arms around me tighter. A smile placed on my lips, the fast, steady beat of Ella's heart, and the TV playing Bubble Guppies in the background, I drift off into sleep.
*****
"Where are we going?" I slurred.
Peter looked over at me and smiled, "well, you never told me your address, and I also assumed your parents wouldn't appreciate you coming home drunk so you can crash at my place."
How sweet. I smiled, "aw thanks so much Peter."
I felt arms around me, picking me up. I opened my eyes, oh we're going in a house. I must've fell asleep on the way here.
He walked to this door that looks like it leads to a basement.
Was that a locking sound I heard?
I looked to see a dirty mattress on the dirty floor. He set me on it and I grimaced at the feeling. It feels hard and maybe a little moist for some reason, and it smells really bad. I was about to get up, but then I felt something rough against my hands. The alcohol made it slow for me to react and I was alright tied to the bed.
My eyes widened and I started sobering up. I turned to see Peter smirking at me.
"Time to have some fun," he said almost in an evil way. He grabbed my face hard to make me look at him as I seen him undoing his pants, "You're gonna be good and sit here and enjoy okay?"
Tears sprung to my eyes.
"Okay!?" He yelled. I cringed and then he slapped me.
Slapped me.
"Say okay." He gritted his teeth.
I couldn't talk.
"Well, looks like I'll go rougher on you."
I started crying as I seen his hard junk get closer. He pinned my legs down and got over me.
"Time for the fun baby." I felt it-
I opened my eyes. I breathed out and realized it was just a dream and I was safe now. What happened yesterday must've triggered some memories since they're coming back in my dream.
I could feel the sweat on me as I took some deep breaths. I closed my eyes and started to do my reps but Ella walked in the room in that moment and was by my side within seconds.
"What happened?" She said frantically.
I shook my head and grabbed my chest, my hand shaking.
"Breathe with me baby. You're okay." She cooed. I did as she said. I breathed with her. "There you go," she encouraged. Once I started breathing normally she took me into her arms, leaning against the headboard. "Want to talk about it at all?" She asked softly.
"Sometimes I'll have nightmares of that night. It hasn't happened in a while though," I whispered.
I felt her nod her head as she held me tighter. "You don't need to be afraid. Cause now you have me."
My stomach swarmed and I looked up at her, a soft smile placed on her lips. I gave her a soft kiss before laying my head back on her chest.
"You start college soon, you excited?" I asked, changing the subject.
"I really am. I'm excited to see who my roommate will be, and I'm excited to make new friends," she said excitedly. I smiled.
"That's good. I'm excited for you."
"I already have my dorm, I'm not sure who my roommate is, but I started packing yesterday and I have my schedule for classes. I'm hyped."
I chuckled at her choice of wording and snuggled deeper into her. "It'll suck not hanging out all day."
"That's for sure. You can come visit me at my dorm and I'll visit you as well."
"We could have lunch together!" I suggested. "Will they let kids into the dorm? Kaleb will want to see you."
I felt her chest rumble against me. "I'll make them let him in if they don't. I'll want to see him too."
I smiled and breathed her in, letting the conversation die as I watched Friends that was now on TV.
"How long was I asleep for?" I asked.
"Only about forty-five minutes. I had gone to keep Kacy company. Your mom was making dinner. Kacy said Marissa wasn't answering her so she was lonely, but she fell asleep," she laughed.
I laughed as I heard my phone buzz. I reached over and grabbed it.
Told your mom I had a girlfriend and wanted to introduce her to everybody. Warning that I'm coming over with Layla soon for dinner :)
Okay! I can't wait.
I then texted Kyler and Ken.
Are y'all coming over for dinner?
Kyler: Duhh. Sarah is coming as well
Kenny: Hell yeah!
I put my phone down.
"You wanna stay for dinner? Dad is coming over to introduce Layla to everybody and I could finally introduce you as my girlfriend if you'd like," I smiled.
She smiled sweetly at me, sending those butterflies out again.
"Of course I'll stay."
"Good," I said and wrapped my arms around her neck and gave her a kiss.
It was slow and sweet. I cupped her jaw as I bit her lip, releasing a moan from Ella. I smiled as my hands ran down her sides.
Then we heard whines from the baby monitor. I smiled as I pulled back from Ella.
"I better go get him," I whispered and pecked her lips again as I heard Kaleb's cries become louder.
I enter his room, seeing the red faced baby. I picked him up and he kept crying. I frowned as I rubbed his back. He usually always stopped when I picked him up.
"What's wrong baby?" I whispered.
He kept crying as he laid his head on my shoulder. I walked back into my room and met Ella's concerned eyes with my own.
I shook my head, signaling I don't know what to do.
I sat him on the bed and held him up. I heard the doorbell ring and I groaned.
"Look at me baby," I cooed.
He lifted his head at me as his little tears ran down his cheeks. I felt his head which felt normal. I weighed my options. Could be getting sick. Maybe a tummy ache, or headache, just no fever. Maybe he just needs a good cry? Maybe he somehow hurt himself? But how. Then Kaleb reaches up and pressed on his cheek.
My eyes softened as the lightbulb in my head lit up. He must be teething again.
I pick him up, cradling his head as I go down the stairs with Ella behind me.
I enter the kitchen seeing Layla and Dad already here.
"Oh hey guys!" I say over Kaleb's cries.
"Is he okay?" My mom asks, concern in her voice as she stirs whatever she's making.
"Yeah, just teething," I say and grab one of the teething rings in the freezer. I hand it to Kaleb who immediately puts it in his mouth to chew. I blow out a breath as I turn to my dad and Layla.
"How are you guys?"
Layla smiles at me, "we're good. Who's this little guy?"
"This is my son, Kaleb," I smile.
"Oh yeah, I remember you telling me about him. He's very cute."
"Thank you. When is everybody else going to get here?"
"I'm not sure," my mom said. "I told them 5:15. It's 5:05. So they better be here soon, and make sure to get Kacy up. This is going to be a hell of a lot of food. Why did we have so many kids, and why do they have to be in relationships already?" My mom huffed exaggeratedly.
I laughed at her and kissed her cheek before handing Kaleb off to dad and exiting the kitchen. I didn't see Ella in the kitchen.
I went to Kacy's room and knocked, hearing a grunt in return. I laughed before entering. I seen Kacy curled up in a bunch of blankets on her phone.
"Dinner will be ready in ten minutes. Be ready," I say to her. She says 'okay' and I close the door behind me. I heard the front door close, signaling somebody else was here.
"Dinner will be ready soon guys. Come down," I tell Ella when she came out of my room. She playfully rolled her eyes at me.
"You're such a mom," she teased.
"Yeah yeah.. Come on," I pulled her with me down the stairs.
Walking into the kitchen I seen everybody was here.
"Hello little sister," Kenny said playfully as he took a bite of celery.
"What's up bitch!" Kyler yelled, earning a smack on the arm from Emily, "Ow!"
"Don't cuss when there's kids around," she scolded. "Hey Kode, hi Ella," Emily smiled at us.
Sarah mumbled a small 'hi'. While I felt Kane run into my legs.
"Hi aunt Kodiii," he dragged. I laughed at him and pet his brunette locks.
"Oh hey guys, before anything else happens," I looked over and winked at my dad. I pulled Ella beside me and took her hand in mine, "Ella is my girlfriend."
"Fucking finally bro. Damn and you said she probably didn't like you. I knew it would work out. I had my sixth sense," Kyler said with her mouth full.
"Kyler! I told you not to start eating yet," Mom said. "But congrats honey. You take care of her." She winked at me.
"Shouldn't you be telling her that?" I furrowed my eyebrows.
They laughed as dad spoke up, "I'll do it." He cleared his throat and put on a stoic face, "Ella, you better take care of my daughter, you hear? I don't care if you're a girl, I do have a shotgu-" Layla clamped a hand over his mouth.
"He doesn't mean any of that dear. Just don't hurt Kodi," she smiled reassuringly. I looked at Ella and she smiled nervously.
I laughed and took her hand, putting her in the chair beside me.
"I'm happy you're happy Kode," Emily said, Sarah nodding her head with her. "Plus, I approve."
I smiled at them as Sarah handed Kaleb to me. Kenny walked around the table and kissed my head and looked at Ella, "you're officially now family and if you ever need anything, you call me and I will handle it and help you as best as I can."
Ella smiled, thanking him, and Kenny gave her a kiss on the cheek.
Kacy just smiled at me from across the table.
"Is anybody gonna explain why we're all here and who this random lady is?" Kyler asked.
Very subtle Kyler. Very subtle.
Dad cleared his throat, "well, you kids mean tons to me. My pride and joys, and well, this is.. this is my girlfriend Layla." He was fidgeting with his hands, he was nervous.
"That's great dad!" Kenny started, smiling at him.
"As long as you're happy," Kyler said. "Nice to meet you," she nodded at Layla.
Kacy had her brows furrowed.
"I don't want a new mom."
"Oh no. I would never ever replace your mom. You don't even have to think of me as a mom," Layla reassured.
Kacy nodded her head and started to zone off. I furrowed my eyebrows until Kyler broke through.
"Kodi doesn't look surprised."
I froze and smiled sheepishly, "I might've already known?"
"What the hell dad that's totally unfair!" Kenny said.
I laughed at them as Kyler and Kenny started arguing with him.
"Guys! It was literally by accident. I went to go surprise him with food when he got back from business and she was there so he basically had to tell me. There was no getting out of it."
Kyler speared a piece of chicken with her fork, "still. He could've told us too."
I laughed and took a bite of my food as well, and gave a little fork full to Kaleb.
I looked at Kacy again, who was pushing her food around.
"Kace?"
She looked up at me and I mouthed 'what's wrong?'
She shrugged me off, looking back down at her plate. I frowned, making a mental note to talk to her about it later and I turned my attention back to everybody else's conversation.
"Remember when Kyler broke dads wrist?" Kenny laughed.
"I did not break his wrist!" Kyler defended herself.
"I wanna hear this one," Sarah smiled.
I laughed remembering this story.
"We were all visiting dad, but Kyler had gone out with friends that night. She came back drunk out of her mind and she had to crawl up the fucking stairs. And dad was walking down but didn't see her and he tripped over her, falling down the stairs and broke his wrist." Everybody laughed as Kenny told the story.
"He kicked me in the fucking head dude. I also got hurt during that!" Kyler grumbled.
"Well you shouldn't even have been coming home drunk at seventeen!" Dad laughed.
"Oh please. I'm sure you did it. Kenny and Kodi also did!"
"Well we were responsible about it," Kenny puffed out his chest. I chuckled, hearing Ella and everybody else laugh.
"What about that time Kodi broke the tv?" Kyler snapped back.
I groaned, "I swear that wasn't even my fault."
"And it wasn't my fault dad broke his wrist!"
"It wasn't my fault the tv broke! Sure I ran into it but Smyth spun me around so many times while I was drunk and when I tried to walk, I tripped, ran into the wall, therefore hitting the tv and causing it to drop."
"I agree that wasn't all Kodi's fault," my mom said sheepishly.
"Ha!" I pointed at Kyler. "Told you!"
"How is that even fair!?" Kyler exasperated.
"Smyth actually paid for most of the tv, he took blame for it for spinning her around while drunk," mom shrugged.
I threw my head back and laughed as Kyler huffed, leaning back in her chair with a frustrated look on her face. She tried not to smile when Sarah caressed her neck and kissed her cheek.
I smiled at them as I finished off my food and Kacy left the table. I frowned and handed Kaleb to Ella. I whispered I'd be right back, giving her a kiss on the cheek and went after Kacy.
I knocked on her door, hearing her telling me to come in. She was in her bed again, under the blankets and was holding a stuffed animal dad got her when she was little.
I smiled softly at her, sitting against her headboard beside her.
"You okay babe?" She shrugged her shoulders at me as she looked down. "Talk to me."
She looked up at me and tears bubbled in pools of blue, "I don't want dad in a relationship," she started. "Well, not with anybody else. Dad and mom have always been close, and they always joke with each other like they used to. I thought they would realize that they were meant to be and get back together."
I opened my arms for her and she crawled into them, "you know I always thought the same thing," I whispered. "But Layla is actually really nice, and at least you still get both your parents who are really cool with each other. They act the same as they did when they were together? Well then maybe they've always just thought of each other as friends, at least for a while," I explain.
"I guess that's not really what I'm worried about much either."
"What's up?"
"Mom and dad have always made time for us and have always been there when we need. It's always been a constant thing. There's no changes. This is a change. There's somebody new in his life. That's a big change. What if he forgets about us? Or what if Layla doesn't like us and he chooses her over us? I don't want to lose him," she whimpered.
I hugged her tighter as tears came to my eyes as well, "he would never ever do that. I promise. If he did that? Mom, Kenny, Kyler, and I would go and beat his ass because there is no way he is going to pick a woman over us. Do you hear me?"
She nodded against me and sniffled.
"Just give Layla a change okay? I've talked to her before and she seems really sweet. She looks like she's genuinely having a good time with all of us and I really think we could all get along."
She nodded again and we sat up. I took her face in my hands, the pads of my thumbs brushing away the rest of her tears and I kissed her forehead.
"Now let's get you cleaned up and get back down there okay?"
"Okay.." She whispered. "Subject change?"
"Of course," I said as we entered the bathroom and I got a rag and wet it.
"How's it feel to have Ella as your girlfriend?" She finally smiled.
I blushed as I wiped under Kacy's eyes. "It feels amazing."
"I'm just really glad you're happy. I was waiting for you guys to get together. It felt like it took ages."
"I was nervous okay? I didn't know how to go about it."
"Well I'm proud of you," she shrugged.
I smiled at her words. Proud. I'm proud of you. The words everybody wants to hear uttered from their loved ones mouths.
I set the rag down and hugged her to me.
"I love you," I kissed her head. "Now come on. You're all better now."
Going back down to the kitchen, Kacy hopped her way over to dad, giving him a hug and kiss on the cheek before going back to her seat.
Dad smiled gratefully at me and he went back into his conversation.
I smile as I look around the room at everybody.
There isn't anywhere else I'd rather be. I couldn't ask for a better family.
Kane is telling Kaleb who knows what. While Kyler and Kenny are once again arguing about some bullshit, my parents and Layla conversing in another conversation, sometimes scolding my siblings for their language.
Ella looked at me, giving me a bright smile, her eyes shining before laughing loudly at something Kenny and Kyler said.
Besides Kaleb, there isn't anybody else's laugh I'd like to hear more than hers.
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