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It takes a lot of guts to actually go and face things that you knew will hurt your feelings. But maybe it takes just that to let go of the past; face it and accept it. What is not meant for you will have to leave you one day. Farhan heaved an inward sigh as he stared at the mirror. His reflection was numb and blank but he knew what he was doing.
"Farhan." Natasha's familiar voice came from behind as she placed her hands on his shoulders and eyed him through the mirror. For a while they did not speak anything, just stared at each other's faces silently. While each of their eyes held fear, for very different reasons.
"If you don't want to go means we don't have to, you know." Natasha gave him a nod, he blinked his eyes in no.
"I got this, It's alright." he forced a smile, but she gave him a worried glance, masking the hurt which she is feeling for the longest of time.
"You've got this," she mumbled again. He nodded his head, "let's go?"
The ride to the hospital went in complete and utter silence. None of them spoke anything for the rest of the ride. Natasha stared at the skies and roads as she placed her head against the window, not exactly knowing what is going to happen next. But something was going to happen, good or bad is up to the almighty.
"We're here already," Natasha asked in surprise, as she got down from the car, like expected there was no response from him as he was lost in his own thoughts.
"You really don't have to do this to yourself," Natasha murmured as they walked into the hospital and stopped at the reception area.
"I want to." he gave her a sad smile and she became silent after that.
"Patient named; Haya Shah. Which floor is she on?" Farhan inquired the lady at the desk, who nodded her head whilst going through the register but frowned when not finding her name.
"Sorry sir, there's no patient with that name." the receptionist replied, they both passed each other confused glances and it was Natasha who spoke this time, "can you check with Hayat shah."
The receptionist nodded again and sighed in relief when the said patient's name was found on the register, "ward no. 408. It's on the fourth floor."
Farhan gave Natasha a small smile, to which she blinked her eyes and they walked towards the elevator, together. When the destined floor came into view, Farhan was the last one to come out.
"You're sure you want to do this?" Natasha asked again. Farhan gave her a blank nod as they walked towards the ward. 408.
He stood in front of the doorknob for a second before clicking it open, and the view in front of him silenced him for a moment. Natasha gave his hand a little squeeze, as she held his hands and gave him an assured nod.
"Assalamualaikum," Natasha greeted happily and made their presence aware to her another best friend, who gave birth just two days ago.
"Walaikum Asalam." Haya and her husband, Abrar smiled at them warmly as they both walked in.
"Finally! I thought you both will never come." Haya sat up comfortably, with Abrar's help, who placed two pillows behind her. She gave him a wide smile and turned to her friends once again.
"We had to come, not for you. But to see my princess." Natasha laughed as she walked towards the crib.
"Masha Allah! Haya... She's so pretty." Natasha cooed in admiration, whilst eyeing the little fairy, who looked adorable in her sleep, "I'm going to spoil her so much. With all my love." Despite her fear of Farhan's reaction to this baby, she was genuinely happy for her friend.
Haya deserved all the happiness in the world and marrying Abrar has given her just that. She prayed to Allah that no evil eyes should snatch that happiness back from her friend.
"You're meeting me after such a long time and then say that. You wound me, Natasha." Haya fake cried, which made them laugh.
"I'm joking yaar, I missed you too, oh my God...She looks Masha Allah just like..." Natasha trailed off with a happy smile as she eyed the fairy, her crazy mind froze at the thought; if she and Farhan would have a baby, then who would it look like? She was lost in thoughts, like always.
"Just like my wife." Abrar subtly winked at Haya, whose cheeks flushed in shyness. Her eyes then go towards Farhan, who was silent the whole time, as he eyed the baby with a small smile on his lips.
"Congratulations, Haya." Farhan was so scared that it would hurt him to see her like this, as a mother, a wife, completing someone's family. A family which he has always pictured in his mind with her and now it is no more. But to his biggest surprise, it didn't hurt. Not even one bit. He only felt genuine happiness for her.
"Thanks, Farhan." Haya smiled at him. Abrar held her hands tightly, as he sat beside her. Farhan passed him the gift box which they got for the baby.
"There was no need for this." Abrar smiled but took them upon his insistence.
"What did you guys name her?" Natasha who was still lost in her thoughts, composed herself and asked them finally.
"Hidaya, Hidaya Abrar Shah." Haya replied with a wide grin, as she eyed her husband full of love and admiration.
"Meaning; guidance and gift." Abrar added with an emotional smile, "she's a blessing in disguise, Masha Allah and I am sure, she is going to guide us all on the right path. Just like her name suggests."
"Masha Allah!" both Natasha and Farhan mumbled at the same time and their eyes get locked for a moment. Natasha felt so relieved when she didn't find any hurt or other kind of emotions in them, instead, it was just happiness. Pure happiness for his best friend. Maybe she was wrong in thinking that he'd feel sad or hurt to be here, but she is happy to be proved wrong anyways.
The baby suddenly began to cry, startling both Natasha and Farhan. They eyed the baby curiously, as Abrar turned around and picked the fairy in his arms, who as though identified who it was, calms down immediately.
"Give her to me, it's her feeding time. That's why she woke up." Haya raised her hands as Abrar carefully placed the baby in her arms.
"Are you hungry? Mama's little Hidaya." Haya made funny faces as she kissed her daughter's forehead and gave them all a nervous smile, who left the ward as quick as they could.
"Natasha, you can stay. I want to talk with you."
Natasha gave Farhan an assuring smile, who nodded at her.
Both men then left the ward whilst passing each other an awkward smile and it was just Haya and Natasha now.
"When can I hold her?" Natasha asked excitedly, as she eyed the baby in her arms.
"Now?" Haya giggled but stopped before saying," you have to wash your hands though. The bathroom's that side." Natasha nodded her head eagerly and came back in a jiffy.
"Masha Allah. I never held a baby before." Natasha squealed excitedly as she held the baby in her arms.
"Is that supposed to scare me?" Haya joked, and they both laughed, all the while Natasha was curiously eyeing the baby.
"I'm sorry." Haya suddenly blurted out, Natasha gave her friend a confused look.
"What for?"
"For not being in contact, I've been busy." Natasha shook her head with a smile.
"It's okay, silly. I understand, married life can be hectic sometimes."
"Speaking of, I'm again sorry for not attending you guys' wedding. My pregnancy didn't exactly support me to travel. If not I'd never miss it for the world." Haya smiled apologetically, but Natasha became blank at that.
"Can I share something with you, Haya?"
"Sure?" Haya gave her friend a confused stare, who passed the baby back to her. She took her daughter carefully whilst beginning to feed her, Natasha averted her gaze for a while until she covered herself with a big shawl.
"I'm decent now, you can look at me." Haya smiled at her, Natasha then looked at her friend with teary eyes.
"Haya... I'm sorry for what I'm going to say. But this is the truth. I'm glad that you hadn't attended my wedding." Natasha blurted out with a sad smile, and Haya was quite taken aback but looked at her friend curiously, hoping for her to continue.
"You know... Farhan was still in love with you when he married me, it hurt so much just to know that and I wasn't sure how I'd have handled it if you'd be there too. You're the girl my to be husband loved dearly. So not my favourite person at that time." Natasha finally muttered those words with a lot of courage. She had been angry with her best friend for a long time now. Might as well let her know that.
"Oh." Haya didn't know what to say to that.
"Farhan was miserable without you, I wasn't there with him. But I could feel it. He was hurt. He distanced himself from the world for months. But he'd mask it like it was nothing. I don't know how easy it was for you to move on so quickly." Natasha muttered whilst wiping off her tears.
"It shouldn't be my concern anyway. It was between you and Farhan, but you're ought to know about what you did to him. You led him on for years, gave him hopes and married someone else. And did not even bother to tell him that. What kind of best friend does that?" Natasha had no idea why she is asking all of this so suddenly. But it was coming in a flow.
"I'm so sorry, Natasha. I couldn't get myself to tell him that I got married to someone else... You know right, how madly he was in love with me. I couldn't get myself to break his heart." Haya muttered weakly.
Who knew that better than her?
"Yeah... his heart broke anyway. Don't worry he's over it now. I guess he has moved on too. I'm sorry for bringing this up suddenly." Natasha apologized with a sad smile.
"It's okay. I deserved to hear it I guess."
"Do you hate me or what?"
"Of course not. I just said you weren't my favourite person at that time when I was getting married. Both of you. Farhan too. I was so mad at you guys." Natasha smiled sheepishly.
"Are you guys okay now?" Haya asked with concern, "Is he treating you well?"
"He does. It took us some time. But he's getting along well." Natasha smiled fondly at their little moments together.
"Oh yeah? Why did you marry him anyway? Even after knowing that Farhan had feelings for me?" Haya asked curiously.
"Parents." Natasha let out a sigh, but a small smile formed on her lips making Haya raise her brows at her.
"Are you happy with this marriage though?" Haya asked with a small smile.
"I am. I'm so glad that I married him." Natasha smiled happily, silently thanking her Lord for doing whatever he did and gave her what she has always desired.
"I'm so sorry Natasha, for whatever hurt I've caused. I didn't mean to, you know right."
"You don't have to ask sorry Haya, I don't know why I said that. Forget it, please. More than me, Farhan deserves that sorry. But you must have already told him, so it's okay now." Natasha gave her friend an assuring smile.
By now the baby was fed and asleep once again, Haya rocked her against her chest.
"We're good?"
"Of course. I wasn't mad at you in the first place. Just a little angry. But I'm glad that I said it aloud. Keeping things to yourself for a longer time is dangerous." Both of them laughed at that.
"But honestly, how is Farhan as a husband? Is he any good?" Haya quirked her brows with a teasing smile.
"You totally missed a gem. He's a great husband." And the exact same moment Farhan walked in.