I spent a good amount of time wallowing in my self pity. I allowed myself to catch feelings for somebody whom I was never sure had a true interest in me. I had put myself in that situation, so I had to be the one to get myself out.
I decided that a week of ignoring Ariana ought to give her time to realize that I was upset with her and give me time to stop being salty about it.
I was wrong.
Within that week she made zero effort to talk to me. She even went as far as sitting in the backseat on her phone when Adriana drove me home after practice instead of our usual switching to make sure we all got in the conversation. Seeing her care so little about my reaction made me hurt even more.
She used me and then decided that I wasn't worth an apology or even acknowledgment. I had easily been replaced by Austin. It hurt more because I couldn't even discuss my pain with my best friend. I couldn't tell her that I didn't want to go out or even to her house because her sister broke my heart.
After a few days, my hurt turned to anger that burned deep.
If she didn't need me, I had absolutely no reason to need her. I went beyond distancing myself.
I stopped all contact. I unadded and unfollowed her on all of my social media platforms and even went as far as deleting some of her close friends. I didn't want to even know of her existence.
Of course, she was still my best friend's twin.
She made it easier for me in some ways. She started eating lunch with Austin which let me avoid her then, and she would sometimes catch him after his football practice for a ride home when Adriana had to drive me.
In ways that were out of her control, she made it harder. I would have to change the topic when Adriana brought her up. I always came up with random excuses as to why I couldn't come over until I just started inviting Adriana to do work at my house. It was a lot smaller than her house, but we had plenty of food to snack on while we goofed off instead of doing our homework.
Ariana didn't try anything until after 2 weeks of what had become my new routine.
She tried to talk to me at practice, but I pretended to be so focused that I hadn't heard.
She tried to wave to me in the halls, but I would act like I hadn't seen.
She tried joke around in the locker room, but I started wearing my headphones to listen to music.
She tried to demand I let her give me a ride home when Adriana had missed school and practice for a doctor's appointment, but I called my mom before she got done in the showers.
Avoiding someone with a life intertwined with yours was exhausting.
After a week of ignoring her advances, she gave up and gave me the silent treatment. It was a lot easier to run away from somebody who was behind you running in the opposite direction. I only really saw her at practice, and even then we never interacted.
It had been a total of 1 month since I had caught her on a date with Austin and done my best to remove her from my life. I knew I still had feelings for her, but they were a lot easier to shove down and ignore.
The homecoming football game had been last night. Adriana, obviously to our situation, invited me to be Ariana's "date", so she didn't third wheel while cheering on her boy toy. I made up a long essay due by Monday that I had been putting off and just had to get out of the way before the dance tonight.
Adriana, knowing I was one to push my work off to the last minute, bought my excuse. However, the compromise was that I had to get ready for the dance at her house.
Originally, I went out of my way to find some reason that I couldn't, but I came up empty handed. I reluctantly agreed. I mean, how bad could it really be? Ariana had taken the hint that I didn't want anything to do with her anymore, and I did really miss Adriana's cat, Gin.
Against my better judgement, I showed up at their house around 5:30, though the dance didn't start until 8. I had brought my dress, and Adriana said she would do my hair and makeup.
Luckily, Ariana wasn't around. She had gone with her friend, Jordan, to get ready at her place. Sadly, she would be coming by for pictures, and we would all be driving to dinner and the dance together. Ending the roller coaster of ups and downs, Ariana was leaving the dance with Jordan or Austin. I didn't really care to actually find out which, I was just thanking the universe that she wasn't going back to her place because as we were getting ready, Adriana was nice enough to inform me that I had to stay the night.
We didn't talk much as we were getting ready, though we did listen to music and sing along like idiots. Their mom came in with cookies to hold us over until after pictures when we would be leaving to get food.
I put on my black dress with a pair of black, strapped heels.
Ariana arrived with Jordan, and we began to pose for pictures while we waited for the boys. For the ones with all 4 of us girls, the twins were in the middle with me on the end behind Adriana and Jordan mirroring my position behind Ariana.
Compared to the light, colorful, and patterned dresses the twins were wearing, my dress seemed plain. Jordan's dress was also dark, but it was more of a ruby color with small, intricate details. I stuck out like a sore thumb.
After a few photos, the boys arrived. Jordan and I got shoved to the middle with our corresponding twin on either side and their boyfriends on the ends. We only took a few photos as a full group before we spilt off for couple photos. I watched as Austin played around with Ariana and gently gripped her. I chose to act like I was fixing my makeup in the car mirror before I had to go back for more photos. It seemed like a better idea than throwing up on the lawn.
I took photos with Adriana, just the two of us. I'm certain they came out good, genuine smiles on our faces and our relaxed body positions.
Then it got interesting. Jordan asked me to take photos with her, seeing as neither of us had a date. I didn't know Jordan very well, and we only ever talking at practice or games, usually only a "good job" exchanged between the two of us. Still, she was a sweet girl.
The first few were awkward and stiff until we attempted to change positions, and I accidentally brushed against her.
"Oh my god, I totally just grabbed your whole boob. I'm so sorry." It came out as more of one long word, in my normal awkward fashion.
She laughed and brushed it off. "You're completely fine. Maybe buy me dinner first next time though?"
"So there's going to be a next time?" I joked back.
She laughed even harder and playfully hit my arm. We locked eyes. I don't think I had ever really noticed how beautiful she was until that moment.
She had dark, black hair that fell down to the middle of her back and bright, blue eyes that looked like they held oceans in them. Her smile illuminated her face. Her lips, painted a dark red to match her dress, only seemed to make all of her other features pop more.
I broke the eye contact and laughed it off.
After that, pictures went extremely smoothly with the two of us. We cracked jokes between each shot and made weird faces at the camera or each other a few times.
Then the inevitable happened.
"Ariana, why don't you come and get a few photos with Y/n?"
My entire body stiffened again, the lax state I just had with Jordan now gone.
She smiled big at me, which I shyly avoided. I turned my eyes to my wrist, acting like I was fixing my bracelet. Her arm snaked around my waist, making my head snap up and my fake smile immediately fall.
"What are you doing?" I whispered harshly.
She looked momentarily taken back but quickly recovered. "I don't know what you mean." She turned toward the camera and began posing.
I did my best to force another smile, but apparently, I wasn't the best at acting.
"Are you okay?" Their mom asked. "You don't look so good."
I did my best to steady myself. "I think I'm just a little famished," I weakly excused.
"You're done with pictures. Go sit in the kitchen and eat some of those cookies while you wait for everybody else."
I nodded and thanked her before making my way into the house.
I plopped on a stool and grabbed a cookie, my right leg immediately jumping up and down as a way to rid myself of my nervous energy. Jordan came in and sat beside me.
"You alright?" she questioned.
"Yeah, I just, umm, I..." I couldn't come up with a good excuse.
"Ariana?"
My eyes went wide and my leg that had been fidgeting came to a holt.
"How did you..."
"She's my best friend. I notice things."
———
i decided to cut this chapter a little bit shorter than i had originally intended just so i could get it out faster because this was kinda an unplanned move and i'm excited about where it's going