"A great marriage is not when the 'perfect couple' come together. It is when an imperfect couple learn to enjoy their differences."
David Meurer
NATHAN
It must have been over an hour I stood outside in the rain before Ms. Maria gave up on trying to walk me back into her house. Enitan's was the only place I could think of going to soothe the numbness that had overtaken every part of me.
And though she took me in, I couldn't bring myself to tell her for fear of her perception changing, I was glad she didn't press further. Her arms felt too right, too perfect for me, I wanted the feeling to last forever.
I'd woken up from the couch at dawn and watched her sleep and knew for sure, my life was fucked without her. It had taken all my strength to say goodbye and leave the room, but was that not the least I could do for her-walk out of her life so she could finally live a normal one. I was going to let her be until she was having my babies, then I'd show up and be the dad my children needed.
***
Before leaving the beach house, I instructed Everest to keep an eye on Enitan to make sure she didn't attend the wedding, she didn't deserve to witness that.
I didn't know how I'd managed to drive home safely with all the emotional turmoil in my life. My thoughts were still muddled from the bombshell Ms. Maria had dropped on me, but a few pieces were starting to fit; the subtle tension that existed between Ms. Maria and my mother, also the fact that she'd taken a liking to me for no apparent reason.
It was all so confusing. But nothing was going to change the way I saw Mrs. Margaret. She'd shown me the love of a mother and more, that was all that mattered.
I arrived the penthouse in time to meet Ivan dropping off a garment bag which I assumed contained my suit. She was already dressed in a beautiful dark green off-shoulder lace gown and dramatic red ashoke gele. The diamond studded earrings and necklace that adorned her sparkled from meters away. Her make-up was heavy, especially the bright red lipstick but it was flawless. She was party ready, the only things missing were her heels and clutch, which I assumed were ditched in the car for comfort.
"You're here? I must have missed your car downstairs," I spoke in monotone as I approached the glass coffee table and dropped my car keys.
I found it hard to believe we didn't share the same mother, we were closer than Siamese twins.
"You had everyone worried. Where did you spend the night?" She squinted her eyes in a scrutinizing manner.
I cleared my voice and averted my eyes. "Thank you for the suit."
Ignoring her question, I took the garment bag from her and trudged to the master bedroom. She followed behind but I could feel her eyes boring into my back. I sat on the accent chair beside the night stand with my head in my hands.
"Wow!" She said, her eyes bulging wide in realization. "I can't believe you right now!" She chuckled and folded her arms across her chest.
"Ivan, not now." My head throbbed no matter how hard I massaged it.
"Then when!" she asked. "You spent the eve of your wedding at your ex's house! We should talk about it."
"No. I'll see you at church," I dismissed her and made for the bathroom but her small slender hands held on to my arm softly, bringing me to a halt.
"Look at you, you're miserable! Why do you still want to do this?"
I watched as her eyes burn with passion, I was impressed at her guts, flattered even. But would she give this same amount of love and concern if she knew I was only her half brother? Or would she despise me for being a result of her father's unfaithfulness?
"Please Ivan, I need my space. I'll see you in church."
"I'll leave," she said, throwing her hands up in surrender. "But know that after today, there's no turning back. Father would always remain the ungrateful and insatiable man that he is. How much more do you have to lose for him to be satisfied! You can back out now and let us fight this the Adakole way, it doesn't matter if we loose, we're loosing this way already-"
"Fine! I've heard you," I interrupted, not hiding the frustration on my face. She was igniting the thoughts I couldn't bare to have. Not just because of Avalon loosing their fortune, but me. What would become of me when words of my illegitimacy and claim to Avalon got out?
"You've heard me? That's all you have to say?" She hissed and walked out after I said nothing.
I bounced on my feet with my eyes closed.
Of course there was no turning back, not just because our pre-nuptial agreement (drafted by her lawyers and signed even before the false proposal) stipulated that in the event of a divorce, I'd forfeit half of my Avalon and Foxtrap shares to Annabelle, but because Enitan would never forgive me.
Today and the moment I took those vows, I'd lose her forever. I'd lose her trust and my worth in her eyes and lose my kids to the doctor.
***
It was already ten minutes past ten a.m. when I exited the shower. I got dressed under five minutes and stood in front of the mirror, adjusting the red-patterned satin bow tie and admiring the cream-coloured three piece suit. Ivan's fashion choices were never wrong and I owed her a lot for taking care of my outfit.
I swallowed a lump as I walked out of the penthouse. In fifteen minutes I was going to be in St Mathew's cathedral, standing before the priest and my family, proclaiming tales of love that didn't exist and making promises I had no intentions to keep. Was that how I wanted to live my life?
I rode the elevator downstairs and on getting into my car, I realized I'd not even bought a ring. I pinched my eyebrows together and hit my forehead with my fist. I didn't need a reminder when I got a Vera Wang diamond ring for Enitan last Christmas, one I stashed away before the planned proposal for fear of rejection.
'What a nice start to your marriage Nate! What a nice start to your marriage.' My inner man mocked.
Turning on the ignition and exiting the underground parking lot, I fished out my phone from my pocket, switched it on and dialled Patrick's number. I knew he was going be so furious from trying to reach me all night, and I was right.
"You're so dead man! How dare you ghost on me on your bachelor's eve?" He spoke on top of his voice. Patrick never raised his voice, not even when his extremely annoying actress girlfriend annoyed him.
"I promise I have a good reason, but now is not the time. I forgot to get a r-"
"And you may never get the time to tell me if you don't get down here real quick." He wasn't willing to listen to whatever I had to say. "Find your way here before Annabelle develops a heart attack or strangles me. Please," he grunted into the phone before ending the call.
I pursed my lips and blew out a long breath.
'Whatever happens, happens.' I braced up as I continued driving to the cathedral.
From the parking lot where I sat in my car, I could see a fretting Annabelle and her family at the back of the church building. I alighted the car and strolled into the main auditorium, ignoring curious glances and honest 'congratulations' from a few bystanders outside. The church was packed with familiar and happy faces, extravagant outfits, different perfume and cologne scents that made me dizzy and hyperventilated.
It looked like the processional hymn had been on for a while, because by the time I walked the aisle, past my seated parents at the second pew, I was met with a scowling middle-aged priest on the altar and an unexcited choir who sang like they were on their death beds.
My friends-Patrick and Tochi, my cousin-Oche and my brother-Kevin were surprisingly in matching dark blue suits as they all stood at the front pew.
My brothers.
I didn't plan on having groomsmen but they were here. I wished the circumstances were different and we could all enjoy the moment like every other day when the energy between the boys and I was off the roof.
Right now I was battling hyperventilation and the view of Annabelle walking down the aisle with arms interlocked with her father's wasn't helping. She looked suffocated in the tight wedding dress and I wondered how she'd managed not to trip with the long layered train of the dress. Tight as it was, the dress was unique and she looked beautiful. Just beautiful to my eyes-my heart didn't flutter as it did whenever Enitan was in a jaw dropping outfit.
Everything was unfolding before me like magic. I was barely part of the wedding planning and yet it had all taken shape nicely. I was surprised to see Monic's son and Annabelle's niece in cute page boy and miniature bridal outfits. They both trudged in front of Annabelle while her bridal train walked behind.
Her father brought her to the altar and stepped back while the bridal party went to their seats at the left row of the church. I unveiled her and the activities that followed were a haze as I kept falling in and out of deep thoughts until I found myself seated.
"Dearly beloved, we're gathered here today, in the presence of God to witness the joining together of our Children, Nathaniel Adakole and Annabelle Martins in the holy covenant of marriage," the priest's voice echoed around the solid walls of the large church as the congregation sat and listened attentively. "Nathan and Annabelle recognize the significance of marriage. They know that marriage was God’s plan for mankind since creation and they have accepted to be part of this plan. Marriage is not a social function with a touch of religion, it is a declaration of your obedience to God's will."
My fingers drummed on my laps and my feet tapped against the tiled floor rapidly as Patrick and Kevin who were sitting on both sides stole glances at me.
Kevin nudged me with his shoulders and bent his head sideways to my ears. "Are you going to be alright?"
I shook my head. "I'm leaving the only woman who's ever truly loved me for me to marry another who only wants me for all I have," I chuckled and ran my palm across my face. "Am I not the dumbest person ever?"
"Why are you still sitting here If your heart knows this?"
"Because unlike you, my burden is heavier and I don't have the courage to face whatever is to come."
"You don't need courage to face the future, you just need to want your sanity so bad and well, throw in a little bit of madness." He smiled.
"What if I regret not doing this?"
"You're going to have to figure that out yourself. But I have a feeling you already know which choice you'll regret," he whispered then turned his head back to the priest.
"Who gives this woman to be joined in marriage with this man?" I heard the priest ask.
Annabelle's father stepped forward and echoed an 'I do.'
The other officiating minister signalled Annabelle and I to climb the altar. We both did and he asked us to hold hands. We obeyed but there was no spark or excitement, just coldness and dread. Was I ready to live with this for the rest of my life?
"Annabelle Martins, if it is your intent to marry Nathan Adakole, please respond with 'I do,'" the priest spoke as one of the servers held the microphone to her mouth.
"I do," she replied faintly, her barely audible voice caused the priest to cock an eyebrow at her. "I do," she repeated, this time a lot louder.
"Annabelle Martins, do you take Nathan to be your lawfully wedded husband, to live together in holy matrimony and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto him, for as long as you both shall live?"
"I do."
He turned to me and returned his gaze to the book in his hands. I stood numb, waiting for an earth shattering sign or miracle to end the moment, but there was none.
"Nathan Adakole, if it is your intent to marry Annabelle Martins, please respond with 'I do.'"
I bowed my head, my mouth opened but nothing came out. The priest repeated his line and I looked up. If looks could kill Annabelle's intense glare would have struck me dead.
The priest focused an amused look on me. "I think the young man is so love-struck he can't even speak. Because I don't see a reason why he'll be here and nicely dressed if he had no intent to marry."
The congregation erupted in laughter and chatters before going quiet again.
What nonsense!
"Aha, let us move on," he chuckled, ending a laughter of his own.
"So, Nathan Adakole, do you take Annabelle Martins to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in holy matrimony and forsaking all others, keep yourself only unto her, for as long as you both shall live?"
Enitan. My kids. My future.
I was making the same decision as my father-picking myself and dignity ahead of Enitan, even though I knew how much it hurt her. I didn't want to turn out like him, but with the choices I've been making, I was half-way there.
Every sound faded into the background, except the beating of my heart that stuck in my head like a timer to a ticking bomb.
I'd be stupid to have been blessed with a woman like Enitan and let her go, just because I was scared of being termed illegitimate or lose my position at Avalon. How selfish, hiding myself from the same judgement I was exposing my own children to.
"Nathan Adakole!" I heard the priest yell from a distance, though I knew he was only a feet or two away. "We don't have all day to spend here. I believe some people are already looking forward to Jollof rice ehn," the congregation broke into another bout of laughter and I became more aware of my surrounding.
"Mr Nathan, do you take Annabelle Martins to be your lawfully wedded wife, to live together in holy Mat-" he started saying again.
"I can't do this," I said, more to myself than the congregation, but the microphone carried the sound around the whole building.
There were chatters and whispers and heads turning around with confusion plastered across their faces. I glanced at the pew my parents were seated and my mother-or my father's legal wife shut her eyes and hung her head low while my father stood and stared fiercely at me. Ivan and Monic who were also seated at the second pew clutched their chest as their faces beamed with smile.
"Say again, young man?" the bewildered priest asked.
"I'm sorry Annabelle." Her face was now filled with dread. A part of me felt awful but it didn't change the fact that my heart was with someone else.
"Nathan, don't you dare!" she warned, gritting her teeth.
"I'd be lying before God, before man and to myself if I go ahead with this." I moved the microphone away from my mouth and stepped closer to her. "I'll be signing up for a lifetime of depression, self loathe and hatred for you if I let us do this."
"Are you out of your mind! You can't do this to me. Nathan!" She shrieked, throwing the red rose bouquet to the floor.
"I'm sorry it took me this long to realize how big of a mistake I was making." I bowed my head and walked down the steps of the altar.
There were mutterings from the congregation but Annabelle's voice could still be heard over the ruckus. "You'll regret this, I promise you!"
Not sparing a glance at the congregation, my family or friends, I walked out of the church.
This chapter has been rewritten and rewritten and I'm so tired, I'm leaving it at this. So much for a climax huh? What are your thoughts on this chapter.