- Bashar Jackson / pop smoke 💫 -
- Bahamas, Bahamas -
"why ain't you talkin?" i nudged Ny as she played with her fingers.
"i'm just tired" she sighed pulling her phone out.
i know she ain't "just tired" but ima just let her slide cause ion know what she got goin on.
"y'all go to the beach" i furrowed my eyebrows as roddy sat on the couch.
"ain't y'all comin?" i asked
"naw. Vanessa been feeling sick as fuck lately. i told her it's probably because she's still having problems with eating when i tell her to" he sighed. "she's upstairs in the shower but she's been throwing up"
"so we just supposed to go by ourselves?" Ny furrowed her eyebrows.
"sum wrong wit goin wit me?" i teased making her roll her eyes playfully as she chuckled lightly.
"y'all go and hangout. i ain't gon leave my fiancé here" he said as we heard Vanessa call out for roddy making him groan.
"go. we gon head out" i said standing up as he did the same.
"ight bro" he dapped me up. "bring me back some fuckin food. i ain't cookin and ion think Vanessa is either"
"roddy!" she whined from the top of the stairs making me chuckle as he threw his head back.
"i'm coming" he said as he made his way upstairs.
i put my phone in my pocket as Ny groaned getting off the couch.
"don't be lazy" i chuckled.
"we gotta walkkkk!" she whined.
"i know but it ain't that far" i shrugged as we made our way to the door.
"what we even gonna do?" she asked after we left out the house shutting the door behind us.
"hit the markets" i said as we made our way onto the street. the markets were close so it didn't suck to walk.
"boutta spend all my money here" she laughed. "how you likin' this vacation so far?" she nudged me as we walked.
"it's chill" i shrugged. "i wanna hit a club or sum. they gettin' action in they damn room and me and you just hearing all of that shit" she giggled.
"they so goddamn loud" she shook her head. "thanks for the other day" i furrowed my eyebrows.
"whatchu mean?" i asked.
"when you let me sleep on you" she looked down as we walked. "i ain't usually do that shit but i was just really tired. i didn't wanna invade your space or anything"
"you cool, shorty" i waved her off. "you light as fuck. and i ain't complaining"
"what you mean?" she asked.
"Shorty you know i been tryna take you out for almost a fuckin month now" i chuckled shaking my head. "why you so guarded wit me?"
she sighed lowly as we walked. she's been ducking this question ever since we started talking and i wanna know why.
"i just had a bad past with my ex" she finally spoke up. "i know you probably don't wanna hear about him but it just wasn't a good relationship"
"he ain't hit you did he?" she shook her head.
"he always wanted to have sex" she sighed. "like yea, i get you wanna be pleasured but he alwaysss wanted to do it" i furrowed my eyebrows. "this might be TMI but, he never even made me cum by eating me out. having sex with him always felt weird.. he always was enjoying it more then me"
"hollup' shorty" i stopped walking making her furrow her eyebrows. "dis nigga never made you cum when he ate you out?" she nodded.
ion know why.. i busted out laughing. he a lil ass boy if he can't make them legs shake.
"shut the fuck up and come on" she pulled my arm.
"did he do Anyyythingg that turned you on?" she shook her head.
"i like being dominated. but with him, it felt like i was dominating him"
well shiii !
"you like being dominated?" i teased making her smack her teeth.
"stop thinking what your thinking" i chuckled shaking my head. "i already see clothes i like" she groaned as we made our way into the markets.
"so what else he do? because i know you ain't just pushing me away cause youn wanna fuck" she sighed.
"he was cheating. everytime i wouldn't wanna have sex, he'd go out and fuck another girl"
"goddamn" i mumbled.
"and something else but i'd rather not speak about it"
"is it that bad?" she nodded.
"it just hurts to talk about.."
"you ever gon tell me?" i asked
"yea.. just not infront of all these people where i might burst out crying" she sighed as we went into a store.
-
as we spent the night looking through stores and just talking about everything about us, it started to get really late out.
i had a plan for her tonight tho..
Vanessa's been throwing up but i had roddy stay home so i could surprise Ny with something.
i ain't gon lie, i've never went this hard for a girl..
but Ny? she so fuckin different. her vibe just different. You know? i ain't never felt sum like this..
"aht aht" i pulled her to me as she went to go into another store. "come wit me" she furrowed her eyebrows as i led her up a set of stairs.
- Nyeisha White -
"you did this?" i asked as my eyes scanned over the balcony that had a table with some food and candles and shit.
date stuff..
"i knew you was gonna keep givin' me a hard time bout this damn date so i just put it together" i smacked my teeth.
"that's why you ain't let me eat?" he nodded.
"come on" he chuckled lightly.
-
as we ate and talked about a lot, i started to think about what this was gonna mean for us in the future..
i'm lowkey scared to trust another guy.. especially after what travis did..
it broke me to fucking pieces.
"what you frownin' for?" he furrowed his eyebrows as he finished eating. "hmm?" he took a sip of the champagne he got for us.
"just thinking" he sighed.
"ion know what you ain't tellin me.. but i can tell you i ain't like yo ex" he said sternly. "i ain't no fuckin' player. ion need no girl but the one i got" i sighed.
"it's not that.. it's not even about you" he furrowed his eyebrows.
"tell me" he said leaning back in his chair.
"he got me pregnant" i said lowly as i looked down at my hands, scared of what he'd say.
"so you gotta kid?"
"no" i began to feel the tears filling my eyes. "i was about 4 months pregnant before i told him.. i was scared of what he'd say and.." i sighed as my tears fell onto my hand. "he told me to get an abortion because h-he didn't want the baby. i wanted it. i told him i wasn't aborting it and he told me he understood.." i looked up at him wiping my eyes. "he stabbed me in my stomach so it killed the baby while i was asleep"
his face completely went blank as i covered my mouth feeling my sobs becoming harder to control.
i only told a few people this story..
it hurts so fucking bad to talk about.
"i.." he started.
"you don't even gotta say anything" i sighed wiping my tears.
he got up from him seat coming over to me with his hand out.
"come on" he sighed pulling me up from my seat.
"i'm sorry. i told you it hurts" i cried lightly as he pulled me into a hug.
"fuck him. he in jail?"
"yea" i sniffled. "he been in jail for 8 months now"
"so dis shit was recent?" i nodded. "i'm so fucking sorry, Ny" he rubbed my back.
"it's okay i just.. i just wish i had that fucking baby" i sighed pulling away.
"ight wipe these damn tears. you way too pretty to be cryin' like dis" he sighed wiping my tear stained cheeks off making me laugh a little.
"thank you for being here" he shook his head.
"it ain't nun shorty. but i wanna head out" i said checking the time. "i wanna get your mind off of this"
"how?"
"we could watch a movie when we get back to the house" he shrugged. "but first" he said stopping me from walking out.
"hmm?" i asked as my eyebrows furrowed.
"friday. date numba 2" i giggled.
"if i say yes will you let me out?"
"not unless you actually mean it" he shrugged.
"i do" he smiled. "i'll go out with you again"