Once school starts again, Brad and I don't mention what has happened on New Year's Eve. I am convinced he wanted to kiss me and for one moment, I believe I would've let him.
It is wrong, treating him like this when my heart belongs to someone else. Instead I don't mention it and act as usual. Luckily he does the same.
Rory and I haven't been hanging out since she and Jess started dating and I feel wrong about not talking to her anymore. She has been a good friend since day one, maybe the universe has decided that Jess and I aren't meant to be after all and I have to let go of it.
The least I can do is try to act normal, and that's what I do one day after Chemistry class when Brad holds a few of my books on our way to my locker. Rory's locker is next to mine and when I see her I don't even think of ignoring her, again. I have to fix this.
'Hey Rory', I say a little too enthusiastic. She looks up to me, her gaze almost relieved when I talk to her again. 'Hey Madelaine, Brad', she nods at both of us. I open my locker and Brad gives me my books, excusing himself to go to the bathroom. Leaving me behind.
'I see your cast is gone', I remark and she agrees on that. 'I'm glad I can use my hand again, believe me showering is very difficult with only one'. We both laugh for a while when I stare in my locker, trying to remember my next class.
'We never talked about Jess', Rory brings up and I sigh deep, knowing this conversation had to come at one point. 'Do you honestly love him?' I ask concerned.
'I do love him', she confirms my thoughts. I nod a little, only wanting the best for him even if it breaks my heart.
'Then I'm glad you two have found each other', I say more honest than I thought. I spread my arms to hug her and she almost falls in them.
'He told me about New York and how you both have met. It honestly sounds like a fairy tale. I was worried he would still be into you', she says soft. I look in her bright eyes when she releases me, a little stunned that Jess has mentioned our history to her.
'I feel like he hates me', I admit and take my French book out of my locker. 'He doesn't hate you. He was worried you would leave him again when he saw you in Stars Hollow', Rory explains. Jess has been worried I would leave him? That is why he is dating another girl? No, I can't think that, of course he loves Rory. Jess won't date a random person.
'I don't think we were meant to be', I answer vague and once the bell rings we both walk to French class, Brad joining us in the classroom.
(time skip)
'Madelaine, can we talk for a moment?' Brad asks when school is over. I hold at the gate, hoping I would still be in time to catch my bus.
Ever since he got back from the bathroom he has a certain sparkle in his eyes, and I'm not quite sure what is going on with him. All of a sudden he seems more confident.
'Of course, but can you keep it short?' I ask unsure and look at the bus stop. He nods enthusiastic and lays both his hands on my shoulders.
'Today I got a call from an agency that wants me to be a part of a musical', he whispers when people walk past us. 'What? Brad that is amazing!'
'Well, if I take this chance I'll be performing on Broadway. The only problem is that I will be gone for a while and have to study everything during my breaks', he explains. My mind only heard one word. Broadway.
I can feel my smile fade a little, the panic raising up when I think of Chilton without him. He has been my only support. Especially after Tristan left.
'Brad I'm so proud of you', I sigh, and I honestly am. 'I only want to do this if you are good with that', he remarks and I widen my eyes.
'Are you joking? If you get a chance to act on Broadway you have to grab it with both hands!' Instead of letting him answer me I hug him tight, knowing that I no longer will get his hugs.
'I'm so proud of you', I whisper again and can feel the tears in my eyes. 'Thank you', he whispers back and lays his arms around my back. After that, we both walk over to the bus stop, me having loads and loads of questions for him.
Brad is going to play in the musical 'Into the woods' and will leave in only a few days. 'I will be seeing you tomorrow, right?' I ask unsure and he nods convincing.
'This isn't a goodbye. Besides, if I do this I will have a higher chance to enter Juilliard', he reminds me. With one last hug we say goodbye and I overthink myself the whole way back to Stars Hollow. I don't catch anything Rory is saying to me.
Brad is living the life I tried to escape for years.