*authors note*
Sooo I'm back yaay excited.
No okay who am I kidding, here you got an update and tomorrow I have my last day of work so after that I still have like a month until college starts. But I can't guarantee you that I'll be totally back on track like before, I'll try my best though.
For now I have this update that's probably still full of mistakes. Sorry for that.
—————
Billie's POV
"So how'd it go with Sam last night? I didn't see you anymore last night. Was it late?" Gavin asks.
"Yeah, we had a fight, she also made me an offer." I tell him. "What kind of offer?" He frowns.
"She basically got asked if she wants to be a sailor for 3 - 6 months in a sailing race." I explain him. "And what does that have to do with you?" He asks.
"It's on the sailing team of her friends Tyson and Matt and they said they needed a maintenance guy too, she asked if I wanted to do that." I explain him.
"Are you gonna go away?" Aldon asks with the biggest puppy dog eyes. "Aw, no Aldon. Don't you worry, okay?" I tell him and pick him up to take him on my lap.
"So, she's closing her bar for months, taking my job away and then trying to take you away from me too? What a bitch." He shakes his head. "What did you tell her?" He asks hopeful.
"I had to promise her to think about it." I answer. "And are you?"
"Am I what?" I frown.
"Thinking about it." He says.
"I don't know, I kinda wanna stay here but ugh, I can't stand dilemma's." I sigh.
"What about we go to the beach today, surf a little with Aldon then go to our show at the bar and have a good night rest?" He asks.
"Sounds good." I nod.
—————
*skip to the evening cuz I'm lazy like that*
"Thank you for another great night y'all." I smile and put the guitar away. Gavin puts his guitar away too and walks off the stage to Aldon.
I walk to them too and order two beers for me and Gavin like usual.
"Daddy I'm tired." Aldon whines. "We're going home in a bit." Gavin says.
"No now." He says, that's the start of him throwing a whole fit in public places.
"Alright, uh Sam keep the money for that beer. I'm going home with Aldon." He says.
"Thanks man." Sam smiles. "Billie, you coming?" He asks.
"Yeah in a bit." I answer.
With that Gavin and Aldon leave.
"Look Bil, I'm sorry alright." Sam sighs. "I don't know bro, I need time alright." I shake my head.
"Actually, I should go, they'll be waiting for me." I say. "Okay uh- okay I guess." She nods. "Keep the money." I say.
Once I go outside I feel a soft sea wind hit my face as rain softly starts dripping.
Rain?
It barely rains here.
Weird-
"She said 'I never want to hurt you again'
I said 'I never want this to come to an end'
She said 'look at me baby, these tears will run out'
I said 'I took you for granted, but I can't be without you'"
I look at the direction of the voice.
A voice so soft,
So fragile,
So pure,
So close but so far away.
That lyrics- 29 by Loïc Nottet-
Our song-
Jules-
"Jules?" I ask.
"The one and only." She says and steps away from the wall where she was standing against. "Alive." She adds with a bitterly laugh.
"Alive physically I guess, mentally not so much." She says.
I can see her face once she was standing in the light of the bar.
A bitterly sad smile and dark circles around her eyes - that are bloodshot red.
She looks like she hadn't had rest in a whole decade.
"You look-"
"Like total shit, I know. I'm a mess Billie, and I'm sorry I come interrupting your perfect life but I can't do this anymore. That's why I allow myself to be selfish - to be selfish to safe myself. Billie I'm begging you, you need to help me." She says.
"Help you?" I frown.
"My life is a mess and it ain't pretty and you're the only one that can keep me on the right end of the road." She sighs. I can see desperation. That's the only thing I see.
She needs help.
"Look, Jules. I've been left here two years waiting for you to come around with a proper explanation for why you just left me like that and now suddenly-"
"Yeah, suddenly I'm here. But the most important thing is that I AM here and not WHEN I'm here." She says.
"I don't know." I shake my head.
"You want an explanation? I can give you that. Let's just sit down somewhere so we can talk." She suggest.
With that we decide to go to the beach and sit down there, it's very peaceful here tonight.
"Okay, so an explanation." She sighs. "Remember when you left me for Jax? You clearly needed that. You needed that break to become who you are as person today-"
"That break fucked me up." I interrupt her.
"Exactly. The break I had now is what I needed to become who I am right now and it fucked me up too. But the point is, I needed it." She says.
"How do you want me to help you? We don't know each other anymore. We're just two strangers meeting after all this time." I answer.
"But we have a past, you still love me. I still love you. We're meant to be, Billie please. I'm literally begging you. I can't do this without you. I need to get better and I need you for that and that's the most selfish thing I've ever done and I'm aware of that." She says.
"I still love you? Like you know anything about that, about love." I shake my head.
"I can prove to you that you still love me. 24 hours is all I need. Go on a date with me 24 hours. That's all I need from you." She says.
"And after that what then? I decide I still love you, that's great. But what if I can't find myself to love you anymore?" I ask.
"Then I'll disappear again. You won't have to hear from me ever again." She shrugs.
"Look, Jules." I sigh. "The thing is, I'm leaving alright. I'm going in less then a week." I say.
"Leaving?" She frowns.
"I'm joining a sailing race around the world. For 3 months, or maybe even 6." I explain.
"With who? That Sam girl?" She asks. "What do you know about Sam?" I frown.
"That she is your rebound for me." She shrugs. "She's a good person, don't talk about her like that." I defend Sam. "Yeah, she for sure is, such a great catch. But you love me still so it doesn't matter if she is a good or bad person." Jules answers.
"I don't know alright you just show up out of the blue, what did you expect? I need time." I tell her.
"I understand, just know I love you. If you want to talk just DM me you follow my new Instagram." She says and places a kiss on my cheek. With that she leaves.