Disclaimer: All is Chuck's...
Part LIV...
"You don't have to look at me like that..." Rajesh sighed at Leonard.
"I'm looking at you like we coulda flown out of Pasadena...Well, at least taken a bus direct if we weren't certain about ids." Leonard glared as the two made their way back from the Alamogordo Western Union office to meet Ms. Glau and her aunt for lunch just outside the National Park.
"You could be glad to have a rich friend who remembers twenty year old account numbers and could get a thousand wired to him from his bank in Boston." Rajesh noted. "And I said I'd pay for lunch and dinner today and the motel room tonight. Plus gas tomorrow, given there's no easier way to get out of here since there's no bus direct and we haven't got valid ids and can't rent a car ourselves. Come on, I had to be sure it was Thursday before I applied for the cash, dude..."
"Why Thursday?" Leonard frowned.
"That's the day I always got roaring drunk at Phillips-Exeter. The female academy near us had date night on Thursday nights and I'd get plastered to talk to them and made sure I was flush enough to throw cash around. I won't have a clue as to the money being gone till Monday at least and then I'm sure to think I just took it out and blew it."
"You used to get drunk and blow 1000 bucks every Thursday? At 13?" Leonard blinked.
"Not...Every Thursday...And not after Papi caught on and cut me off Wednesday evenings to Saturday mornings. Prya's fault, you know." Sigh. "I called her once in India on a Thursday night to ask how to get a girl to take her dress off when I was bombed and she ratted me out. She was a mean sister when she was little and cute. Of course, now, I've got the goods on her, thanks to you, so..." smile.
"Your parents know I dated her." Leonard shrugged.
"But her fiancée's parents don't." grin to Leonard's sidelong glance. "Dude, just be glad I told her there wasn't a chance of getting you back when she called."
"She really did that? Called you and asked?" Leonard eyed him.
(Not that it means anything...Penny's image eyeing him. I know you're just stroking the ole ego a little. Rat-bastard...Narrow glare.
Now take that money and get movin'! Angry, sweeping wave of hand...
So it's ok...?
She's fifteen and her dad and aunt will be there as well as Raj, right? Grim stare...
Oh, yeah...
And it's the fastest, maybe only way, right?
Yep...Faintest of imaginary smiles.
Then wipe that smug look off yer face, have a nice dinner on Raj...He owes us...And move it, bucko! I could be dying here.
Oh, and pick me up a souvenir as long as you're there...
Eyeing his look...Of course it's really for you, you think I want a model of the first A bomb?)
"She did. Of course, she was still thinking in terms of having you on the side as her lil' American lover and marrying creepo the multimillionaire industrial tycoon."
"She actually thought I'd go along with something like that?" frown. "Knowing Penny and I...?"
(Coulda...Tole...Ya...Penny's grinning image.
Lucky for you, I know you wouldn't. High-minded nod.
As you know what's good for ya...Hard stare.)
"Oh, sure as to Penny. But, she'd no intention of telling you she was engaged. Anymore than she'd tell her US legal firm her future husband was indicted for running a slavery ring to staff his businesses."
Leonard eyeing him...
"Sorry, you dated the brown Ivanka..." Raj shrugged. "I did try to warn you off, you know. Even though you were really her last hope for being a decent person. I think you would have saved her, if you'd landed her before creepo. If she'd wanted to be saved." Sigh. "I would loved having you for a bro-in-law, dude. Even if my eyes would burn constantly at the thought of you doing my sis."
"Thanks." Leonard, awkwardly. "Well...Maybe she'll turn out all right in the end."
(Pffft...Penny's image, mockingly...
Sorry for Rajesh though. That was nice, that he wanted you to be his bro-in-law, nod.
But if I die not if she's the last human woman on Earth, get me? She can marry....Uh...Stuart, maybe.
No, that's cruel to Stuart. Eh, leave her to creepo. He sounds like Kurt.
Penny...He was abusive. He hurt you. You wouldn't do that...
Why do you always have to make me a better person? She frowned. And you make me cry.
Leonard? Make me cry...Soon. The image faded out.
And a pair of those Native American hand-made sandals you saw near the Park would be thoughtful...Mental voice fading...)
"Dude, she still keeps asking me to let her know when she might try catching you for a quickie after a fight with Penny. And if I could smuggle out the latest Cal Tech data on a couple of industrial processes." Sigh.
Wait, whoa...
"Say, she's only nine now. We could change the course of her existence. A few doom-threatening emails from a mysterious stranger with knowledge of her past and future...?" eager stare.
"No, we can't...It could contaminate the timeline..." Leonard shook head.
"I suppose...Could still scare the willies out of her, though."
"Raj..."
"Can't I just be a good brother who wants to use stalking and blackmail to save his sister from a terrible future...?"
"Married to a multimillionaire? I think it's what she's always...Oh, my God!" Leonard eyed photo Raj had pulled.
"She's going to marry...Him?" he blinked.
(Why? You still want to...Oh, my God! Penny's mental image stared.
It's like he's four times her height, lengthwise.
And you just lovin' it, aren't you? The image eyed Leonard.
Well...It sure means I'm not "obese" by comparison, he mentally grinned to the image.
By...Comparison...She noted.
Aw, c'mon...)
...
Not wishing to leave Penny alone, but exhausted and concerned for Sheldon's likewise exhausted condition...So much so he'd not followed his normal bathroom am schedule, indicating a possible health-related side-effect of wormhole travel...Amy had turned to her counterpart for assistance. Margaret in her turn only too glad to ensure young Amy not spend too much time with her young Romeo...
"I should like to ask you how we met..." young Amy noted to Penny in her CCU room, she now seated in chair pulled close to bed. Penny beaming at lil' bestie...God, was there ever anything so cute outside young Wednesday Addams? Margaret, on bench in the room, writing up some class notes.
"...but of course that could compromise the timeline."
"Yeah, I suppose." Penny nodded.
"Though I suspect I saw you as a potential rival for Sheldon." Shrewd stare. "Then learned you were anything but..."
"Oh, definitely..." Penny agreed, hastily. "Just friends, Sheldon and me."
Margaret looking over...
"...and the rest intrigues me." Amy continued. "I had a strong instinctive feeling from the moment we met, despite my sensible precautions..."
Threatening me with poison...Penny thought but did not say, eyeing Margaret...
"...that you and I are close and meant to be so, yet I can't for the life of me understand why? Granma?" Amy turned to Margaret. "Can you formulate a hypothesis?"
"Penny's a lamb and you have always wanted one of the pretty and popular girls to be your friend." Margaret shrugged.
"Incisive as always, Grandma. Thanks." Nod.
"That's sweet, thanks...Gran." Penny smiled.
"Not at all...Though I also surmise that you were never all that popular..." Margaret smiled.
"Hey, I was Corn Queen three times running..." Penny noted.
"The decisive voting block, horny young lads, no doubt. Nor always the lamb you are now..." shrewd grin. "Life's taught you a lesson or two in kindness and humility. To your credit, since not everyone learns."
"I always tried to be nice...Sometimes it just didn't come out the way I wanted." Penny sighed.
Cut to shot of thirteen-year-old Penny in Nebraska... In school bathroom, trying to pat down the large and awkward girl whose head she'd just removed from the toilet.
"Look, I had to...The other guys were watching..." young Penny, urgently.
"But I thought we were friends, Penny. Ever since second grade..." the girl, wiping tears. "How could you do that?"
"Sarah, I just got to hang with the cool girls after I gained a foot and lost weight. I can't blow that now...In a year you'll shoot up and we can be friends again. If you don't look like a cow and you learn to dress right." Indicating her own rather teen pop borderline risqué outfit.
Sigh... "And she did shoot up a year later...And od'd on heroin." Penny, shaking head. "I hadn't kept up with her and heard about it later. I abandoned my best friend just to please a bunch of assholes who never even really liked me."
"But you never did it again, did you?" Margaret smiled. Amy watching...
"No...Never... Well, I did beat up a nerdlinger in sophomore high but she ratted us out for smoking and stole my cheerleading skirt off the girls' locker floor when I was making out...Well, long, unfortunate, though thank God, minus permanent consequences, story..." sigh.
"Wait...It's a year from now..." she blinked. "Get me a phone! I have to call Sarah!" she looked about weakly.
"Penny, what would you tell her?" Margaret eyed her.
"'Don't do drugs?' I don't know..." vague wave. "I hafta put it right, see Leonard knew how bad I felt and had me call her parents on the anniversary after I tole him and I told them...'I'm sorry. I'm so sorry...'" she eyed Margaret. "He always knew how to make me feel better about myself..."
"I hafta try and put it right..." she insisted. "Leonard...Would want..." weeping... "Please? Amy? Let me try...?"
"Here..." Amy held phone receiver to her. "Just tell me the number, then tell her you love her and you're sorry."
"Thanks, bestie..." Penny beamed.
"And then you can explain exactly what 'just friends' meant, in detail." Stern look.
...
Young Sheldon's apartment...
Security currently partially disabled after the janitor incident earlier that morning...
"So, Dr. Francis came to see you and told you he was offering to help?" young Sheldon noted.
"Yes..." Stein nodded. "But I suspect it's a Trojan Horse. He wants to prevent us from taking any action that would affect what he's done. Plus he wants to act against Susan as he's sure she'll definitely try to disrupt what he's done."
"Why would she?" a weary, but determined to stay up till younger Sheldon had departed for the day...Not entirely altruistically, as she noted to adult Sheldon... Rather embarrassing to go to the bedroom together in front of the kid, but no way she was missing out on potential passion later...Adult Amy asked. "What's it to her if Dr. Francis has saved his wife in another universe? It's likely to have happened in any case, given an infinite multiverse."
"Each crossover by one linked to her is likely to affect her own outcome..." Stein notes. "Given Susan's paranoia and jealousy, any chance she won't get what she's risked so much for must be dealt with. That includes at least your counterpart, Amy. And you too, if she learns from Xavier that you're here. He may be hoping to deflect her using you both."
"But how could she affect an outcome Dr. Francis has...Oh, my..." Sheldon blinked. Young Sheldon likewise...
"She'll do it again? Hewre?" Kripke stared.
"It's an infinite multiverse, Barry." Stein noted, nodding. "Why not destroy a second universe to secure your goal? And then a third to return to another version of this one...And on and on...Exactly what we feared, Cooper." He eyed Sheldon. "A cascade effect..."
"Unless we stop her..." Amy, grimly. "Or Francis does. He might be right. We may have mutual interests here."
"I would not put trust in him." Stein sighed. "This is not the man I knew. Still, the greater threat is my poor grown daughter."
"Well, Team Kwripke/young Coopewr is wready." Kripke noted. "In fact we're best suited for the hunt. She bawrely knows who I am and although she'd wrecognize young Sheldon, he's small and easily hidden."
"Agreed." Young Sheldon nods.
"What? No..." Amy frowns. "You can't take a twelve-year old out hunting a dangerous maniac. Tell him, Sheldon."
"Actually..." Sheldon shrugged. "Kripke has a good point. He's the least likely of Susan would remember, let alone expect to meet. And he doesn't know this place and era that well, my younger self does."
"She's not likely to harm me." Young Sheldon noted.
"Just kidnap you and take you elsewhere, waiting for you to grow up." Amy sighed. "Lets think up another plan..."
"I think you're right, in part, Dr. Fowler..." Stein nodded. "This calls for some detective work..."
"Fine...I'm a bit exhausted but point me to the computer..." Sheldon sighed.
"No, actually I mean real detectives..." Stein noted. "Xavier and I kept a firm on retainer. Every now and then we've had to have someone's claims checked out. To protect ourselves in a few delicate matters."
"Yes...Youwr wreputation pwroceeds you, Doctowr." Kripke nodded solemnly.
More like follows you around and hangs a sign...Sheldon thought. Even then/now the "Creator" rep was firmly established.
"Well, a bit exaggerated." Stein, wry look to Amy. "But I have already given a description of Susan based on what you've told me about her current appearance to our firm and they are looking for her and Xavier as well."
"Well, that's fine...And thank you, Dr. Stein. We owe you a great deal for all your help here." Young Sheldon noted. "But I still think Barry is right and we should make our own independent effort..."
"Wait...A mo... 'Barry'?" Sheldon eyed the two.
"He's been a good friend in assisting us, Sheldon." Young Sheldon noted. "And you did promote him to 'friend'."
"Yes...But there are limits..." Sheldon frowned.
"Now, now. 'Coop' and I have things all planned out." Kripke beamed at 'Coop' who nodded. "Indeed, Krip..."
Coop? Krip? Sheldon eyed Amy. Who gave hapless shrug...
Oh, this timeline is hopelessly contaminated...
"He'll be in no dangewr...We'll simply watch ovewr the Physics Building whilst if Dwr. Stein would be so kind as to awrrange access, I seawrch the pwrimitive Intewrnet of this bewnighted dawrk age for any signs she is acquiwring equipment wrelated to wowrmhole activation."
"It does make sense. So long as young Cooper's in no danger. And I'd be at the Physics Department preparing for lectures later today, so I can watch over him as well. In fact, Sheldon should continue to attend regular classes so no suspicion is aroused if Susan has not made contact with Xavier and believes he's still uninvolved." Stein noted.
"Wait a mo..." Amy frowned. "This sounds suspiciously like a scheme to lure Susan in, using Sheldon the younger."
Younger, more compact...And Krip says I haven't yet developed more than half of Sheldon's more annoying traits...Young Sheldon thought, beaming at Amy.
"Sheldon?!" she eyed adult Sheldon. "You have that 'don't let Amy know' look on, complete with nervous eye roll. Are you included in this?" frown.
Uh...
"I knew you weren't trying to compensate for the change in your bathroom schedule back at the hospital! You called them, you all came up with this cockamamy scheme, behind my back!" she glared. "You can't use yourself as bait..."
Cockamamy? Kripke eyed Sheldon...
Tis' a far, far better thing I do...Then I have ever done before...Young Sheldon, solemn look.
"Amy...It may lead nowhere, but we need to try something to find Susan." Sheldon sighed. "And she won't harm me. Him..."
"What about Dr. Stein's detectives...? Or was that comforting pabulum for the exhausted neurobiologist?"
"They are indeed on the case, Amy." Stein sighed. "But they could scour the city for days without luck. Susan grew up here, she knows every proper place to hole up. Xavier's been here countless times."
"I'll just be in my class, Amy. I'll be fine. But I truly appreciate the sentiment." Young Sheldon nodded.
"I don't like this..." Amy frowned. "Whose crazy idea was this, initially? Sheldon?!" she eyed Sheldon's slight glance away.
"Amy." He sighed. "Sheldon is Susan's focal point. Sooner or later she's going to come looking for him, first to ensure her counterpart and he hook up...Only your own counterpart has any other interest for her. And no way am I putting young Amy at risk. She's in enough danger already."
"Indeed." Young Sheldon nodded. "But again, thanks for your concern, my beloved's future self."
"And since I'm not sure she's safe even at a CCU with your Gran Mag watching over her, as soon as I get a little sleep, I'm mounting guard there." Sheldon insisted. "Sheldon will be fine with Kripke and Dr. Stein to watch him."
"And me." Amy firmly.
"Fowlewr. Defeats the puwrpose if Susan spots you." Kripke notes.
"I'll stay well hidden. If Sheldon can expose himself at the hospital, I can at the Physics Department. Besides, I'll disguise myself. She won't be expecting me anyway. And she'd be expecting Amy Farrah Fowler, not some voluptuous grad coed luring men like moths to a flame."
"Disguise yourself?" Sheldon stared. "How could you? Your natural radiance must overpower any such. Besides, you're already...Voluptuous...It's your natural state."
"Agreed." Young Sheldon.
"Knock it off..." Amy frowned, pleased beam seeping. "Anyway I have years of Penny-observation for my make over. You know, Penny gave me a few acting lessons to improve my lectures. This is my chance to take to the boards."
Well, I suppose just taking hewr cawrdigan off would fool most folks... Kripke thought.
Sheldon blinking... "You mean...?"
"Yes...Goodbye to the brilliant if...Voluptuous...Amy Farrah Fowler. Hello, shoe-and clothing-obsessed, boy magnet, but still unavoidably brilliant...I am supposed to be a Physics grad student...Penelope." Beam. "Lets see...I'll have to forego sleep to shop. I'll need abundant makeup, a blonde wig, a t-shirt with some suggestive phrasing, form-fitting slacks, and ridiculously expensive shoes of some sort. Fortunately, I already have the glasses to indicate I have a remarkable brain as well."
"Wait, what about this 'moths to a flame' business?" Sheldon frowned.
"It's just acting, Sheldon." Amy beamed.
Playing Penny...It's like a dream come true.
So long as you don't like me that way too much, she eyed Sheldon...
"But it never improved your lectures..." he noted.