My anger overrides the passion Shy has stirred within me. If it weren't for the anger, I would be easily lost in his arms. The sensations he manages to conjure within me is magic. It's something I'll never have again after today. After this moment. Even if I ever did meet someone else and move on, I'll never have this. Placing my hands against his chest, I shove him away leaving me breathless.
My fingers shakily touch my swollen lips. This is the last time I'm going to feel this because I refuse to let Shy take advantage of me.
"Luna, please," his voice husks.
"Let me go, Shy. Open this door."
"I'm not letting you go. I fucking lo...," he stops, a look crossing over his face.
It feels like minutes are dragging by. He's just staring, but so am I. In a breath, he breaks the moment unlocking the door and leaves without looking back.
He left me. Left me standing in the men's room. What just happened? Glancing myself in the mirror, I come to my senses and leave to head to my next class.
I feel like I'm a zombie walking in a daze. Was he about to tell me he loves me? I'll never know because he didn't finish his sentence. What if he had? What would I have done? I'm glad he didn't finish his damn sentence. It would have complicated my already messed up feelings. I start to walk faster.
If I immerse myself in my work, things will be okay. Distraction is what I need. Actually, food is what I need. I'm going to go to lunch with Eric whether Shy likes it or not. I mean, I'll go to lunch if I can find him on campus. Either way, Shy has to learn he can't boss me around. God, I need my best friend.
After two more classes, it's finally time for lunch and I see Kiki first. There must be a look on my face because her expression drops.
"What happened?"
"I met up with Eric in the library and then Shy came, threatened Eric, locked me in the men's bathroom with him and kissed me. My life is hell," I groan.
"Oh my God. I'm gonna have Alex tell Shy to leave you alone."
"Kiki don't. I don't want Alex's relationship to be ruined because of me. It's okay. I can handle him."
"He's never going to give up on you, Luna. He's clearly in love with you."
"I don't know. He was about to say something to me, then he just stopped and left without a word. It was so weird."
Kiki shook her head draping her arm around my shoulders and walked us into the cafeteria straight to the pizza station. She's the only one who knows me, I swear to God.
"Violá. The cure and answer to all your problems," Kiki laughs.
"Hey!" Eric jogs up.
Oh great. Just what I need. Despite my early reasoning of my going to lunch with Eric, actually being faced with it feels a bit different. I mean, didn't he hear Shy? If Shy catches us together, he's going to kill Eric. Isn't Eric afraid? If not, he should be. I shoot my eyes at Kiki.
"Are you Eric Sumner?" Kiki asks.
"I am." He holds out his hand, but drops it after he realizes Kiki isn't going to take it.
"Dude, you're pretty gutsy. You do remember Shy is her ex right?"
"I don't scare easily. Plus, Luna agreed to have lunch with me."
"It's a threesome," Kiki states. "She's having lunch with me too. We're getting pizza."
"That's not the healthiest of choices, you know," Eric admonishes.
Kiki curls her lip, "Dude, don't make me hate you."
We all sit down at a table and eat in relative silence. This is the most awkward lunch I've ever had. I don't want to be here. What happened in the bathroom keeps running through my mind. And speak of the devil...I mean Satan.
"Nooo," I groan. "I'm being stalked. Eric you better go. I'm not sure I can handle this."
"Luna, I'm not going anywhere. I get that Shy is your ex, but he's going to have to get used to me. We're friends now, and I don't scare easily."
Kiki rolls her eyes biting into her slice of pizza. I can see Shy at the grill station. He bought a grilled chicken breast, and I think he also has steamed broccoli. No wonder he has abs. I shake my head. Why the hell do I care what he's eating? Why am I even paying attention to him? Before I can turn away, he locks eyes with me then moves on to Eric. I can see he's fuming mad.
Wait. Is he headed this way? Oh my God, he is. What the hell is going to happen now? Why doesn't this day end? What is it about me that these men find so great? I don't get it. No one ever approached me in high school. Now all of a sudden, I'm popular? I don't like this at all.
"Kiki. Mind if I sit with you?"
Shy doesn't wait for her to answer and sits down at our table not bothering to look at Eric. He looks at me and nods. I don't do anything.
"Sure," she responds in her no-care attitude voice.
"I'm looking to commission some work, if you're interested," he says stabbing a piece of broccoli.
"Ooo, yes I am. What is it you're wantin'?" she perks up.
"Something for over my fireplace in my living room. I want a scene that depicts a war between heaven and hell. Demons...against angels," he looks at me.
Kiki gleans his meaning, "Do you want, like, Satan to be depicted among his devils?" She looks at me and smirks.
"I'll leave that up to you. Only, I want it shown that Satan is clearly winning this particular war."
"I gotcha. How soon do you want it?"
"Take your time. This has to be done right. It has to be perfect."
"How big?"
"I want it to take up the area on my wall above my mantle."
"Mkay. I'll have to come over and measure. You're talking some major coinage, my friend."
"It'll be worth it."
What is he doing? And why is Kiki going along with it? I don't understand.
"No budget then?"
"No."
Eric's brows raise before narrowing down on my boyfriend. Ex...boyfriend. I don't like the way he's looking at Shy. He doesn't know him. He doesn't know anything. Of course, what do I expect? Eric is interested in me, and Shy is his competition and vice versa. How do I stop this pissing match?
Kiki pats my leg and motions that she's going to use the restroom. I want to follow her, but I stay in my seat. I'm no coward. Except when I see Shy slide Kiki's tray over and switches seats so that he's sitting next to me in her spot. He leans over to me.
"Rosa's pizza is much better than that crap."
Why did he have to bring up the memory of our first date? Why did he have to bring up the memory of that pizza? Now I'm craving it. Great.
"Yeah," I whisper.
"Why are you sitting here, Shy?" Eric is brave enough to ask.
"I don't owe you a fucking explanation."
"I'm not afraid of you," Eric challenges.
Shy leans forward, "I thought you were smart, Eric?" he whispers running his tongue over his teeth.
Eric curls his lip and dares to shift closer to me. On instinct, I shift closer to Shy who then finishes the job by pulling my chair flush against his. I let out a sigh.
"I'm not hungry anymore. I...I'm going to go home." I stand up and leave not waiting for a response from my two suitors. Kiki stops me on her way back to the table.
"Where you going? What happened?"
"A pissing contest I'm not interested in watching. Kiki, I think I need to go home."
"I'll come with."
"No. That's not what I meant. I mean, I think I should go home, home. I need to clear my head and get a handle on what it is I want. Staying here isn't it. At least not now."
Kiki looks crestfallen, but nods her head. "I get it. Luna, I'm here for you. Okay? I got you. Go home and regroup. Things will be okay. I promise," she kisses my forehead.
When I make it back to my room, I text my mom.
Luna: Mom, I know you're going to be disappointed, but I think I need to come home.
Marianne: Are you okay, dear?
Luna: Not really. Mom, I need to really talk with you. I really need you.
Marianne: Okay, Luna. Do you want to be picked up today or tomorrow?
Luna: If you're not too busy I'd like to be picked up now, please.
Marianne: Alright.
That went better than I expected. Huh. Weird. I should pack up some things. A lot of my clothes are still at home, so I really need my essentials. That should do it. I grab a jacket and head outside. It won't take my mom long to get here. Thirty minutes tops. I'm not excited about going home, but I need to get some things straight with the expectations my parents put on me because I'm stressed out.
Maybe if I do that, I'll be able to have more clarity on the direction I want to take with my life. And, maybe if I talk with my mom I can try to figure out what is wrong with her.
Like clockwork, my mother pulls up and I hop into her car. She smiles at me, but focuses on the road ahead. So much for trying to be open with her. I bite my lip. Maybe I need to try harder.
"Thank you for picking me up."
"You're welcome, dear. So, tell me. What is this all about, Luna? Does this have anything to do with that hoodlum you were dating?"
"He's not a hoodlum. But, to tell you the truth, I'm having trouble with picking a major. I'm not sure about school anymore, mom."
"Nonsense. You've only just started, Luna. You need to give yourself a chance. And you know there's time to change your major. You know your father and I expect you to stay in school, but you're free to pick your career."
"Just not who I love."
Mother tsks. "Love? Come on, Luna. How long have you known that man? You can't possibly love him."
"I...I just don't understand why you're so opposed to him? He's more accomplished than any of the men at that school."
"Are you blind? Have you not taken a good look? He's covered in head to toe ink, Luna. People like that are the degenerates of the world. They're looked down upon. His success won't last. Mark my words."
"Mom that's, like, nineteen fifties thinking. Tattoos are no big deal nowadays. He's a good man. I love him."
"You don't know what love is."
The rest of the drive is made in silence and when we arrive home, I go upstairs to my room and plop down onto my bed and stare up at the ceiling where I have a poster of the ocean. I wish I were on a tropical island right now. Not a care in the world to bother me. No expectations, no rules, no anger, no stress, no sadness. Only sunshine, a warm breeze and the sounds of the ocean crashing against the shore where the sand would be warm like an electric blanket under my feet.
I must have closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep because the next thing I know, I'm being woken up by my father.
"Hello, Luna. Dinner will be ready soon."
He drags a chair. Oh goody. Just what I want after being woken up from a nap. A lecture. What made me think coming home was the answer? Running away from my problems doesn't solve anything. Did I think my problems were going to disappear? Sometimes, I'm so dumb. I swear to God.
"Hi dad."
"Your mother tells me you're questioning your schooling. Now you know you can't drop out. You do need to continue on. You can pick another major if you want, of course. But your education will go on," he smiles tight lipped.
I need to go back to school. He's right about that because me trying to get support from my parents is a joke. College is my escape. My safe haven. I can't let boy trouble scare me away. As far as what I am going to major in, who cares? I'll figure that out later. Time to put on a show.
"You know, dad, you're right. I think I just got overwhelmed. Having napped in my bed here at home really cleared my head. In fact, I think I just might take your advice and work my way toward becoming a lawyer like mom. I feel so much better."
I actually wouldn't be a bad lawyer. The look of relief on my father's face tells me I've convinced him. Heh. That wasn't hard at all. He slaps his leg and smiles.
"That's the spirit. Good girl. Now come on down and have some of your mother's famous lasagna."
I picked a good day to come home. If anything else, at least I get to eat a home cooked meal of the only thing my mom can cook properly. Bonus.
After I eat, I'll go back to school and just continue with my classes and see what life wants to throw at me. Screw allowing stress to get the best of me. I'm going to just go through the actions of living and then maybe my problems will go away on their own. Grabbing the bag I packed, I take it downstairs and toss it on the couch. I want everything near me so that I can leave right away.
I don't know what's up with my mom except for the fact that I think she's always been a big asshole. Living with my parents my whole life blinded me to how they really are. Now that I've been on my own a little while, the veil has been raised and I'm seeing how they are for the first time. That's my only explanation. At least I know I tried to talk to my mother. If she doesn't want to have a friendship with me, it's her loss. Even though I've never been buddy buddy with her, I can't deny it hurts a little. I'll get over it.
"Your lasagna is great, mom. I think after dinner I'll be ready to go back to school. I think being here for a few hours was the thing I needed to clear my mind."
"Oh! That's wonderful, dear."
"Marianne, Luna has even decided to pursue a career in law on a higher level. Tell her, Luna."
"Oh. Yeah. I think I actually want to become a lawyer rather than just a paralegal," I smile. I don't want to be a stupid lawyer, but they don't need to know that.
"Excellent. I'm very happy to hear this. Luna, anytime you need to clear your mind, you just call me and we will bring you right home for a few hours. Very good call on your part, dear."
I nod my head. Yeah. Real great call. Pff.
- Author's note-
Hi guys! Just wanted to let y'all know there's only two more chapters left! Please vote and comment if you're enjoying Different IRL!
Thank youuuuuu!!!!!!!