Disclaimer: All is Chuck's...
Part XV...
"It is surprising how things repeat themselves in this marvelous, infinite multiverse..." Stein pondered, smiling at Amy as they stood on the Pasadena General ER patio. "You're right to say Xavier and I were like Leonard and Sheldon, once. I'm not exaggerating when I say I see a lot of myself in Sheldon...And I was, like him, headed down a path of isolation and loneliness until Xavier Francis and his own beloved Margaret came into my life and changed its course, forever...They, and a certain other Margaret..." wry smile...
1959...Princeton, New Jersey...
"Mr. Stein..." narrow look, lift of glasses, non-nonsensely sharp New England accent... "Having just arrogantly declared that the Universe is only to be understood via the laws of Physics, perhaps you might enlighten us as to its application in the human neuron."
"Care to play a little ball, Scarecrow..." a smirking hiss from a nearby student to the lanky, black rimmed, Harold Lloyd style bespectacled Stein in sweater vest, slide rule protruding from shirt pocket, now standing to face the cool stare of Dr. Margaret Fowler...Princeton's respected, feared, and though never openly admitted among the males, much desired, Wicked Witch of the East, departmental chair of Neurophysiology and Neurology, whose considerable side interest in Psychology had led her to teaching this elective seminar... "Physiologic Psychology and the Human Brain...", the validity of which the brilliant young physics prodigy and doctoral candidate, Francis Stein had just, perhaps somewhat unwisely, denounced in no uncertain terms...In answering a Socratic summons from the professor, he repeating his usual refrain of being rather annoyed at having to have been required to "waste his valuable time" taking such an elective in the first place...
"Well, Mr. Stein?...By the way Mr. Montaine, I think we all, and in particular, I...And my famous cousin...Appreciate your taste in films but suppose you demonstrate your remarkable memory by debating Mr. Stein here after he's made his point."
"Well, Dr. Fowler..." Stein, reperching glasses on nose...His buttoned up, checked shirt betraying a missing collar button as a corner of collar flapped with each word. "A neuron must work on physical principles and subject to the laws of electromagnetism and physics. The human brain is simply the sum total of those principles in mass application."
"So we are simply machines, subject to physical laws with perfectly predictable outcomes?" she replied serenely.
He blinked at the deep brown eyes boring into him...
"Well...Given the data and the calculating power...I could probably make reasonable predictions of outcomes based on the electromagnetic activity of the brain, yes."
"All right..." nod... "And you would say that specific study of the brain and the outcomes generated is unnecessary because you could presumably derive all outcomes from theoretical physics? In short, meaning, there is no need for you to be taking this course?"
"If the goal is to see the underlying principles, it's much better for me to work on the basic science...The Queen of Science, in fact, Physics."
"I see...Well, Mr. Stein..." smile...Flashing eyes...Firm jut of proud rather notable chin. "I should like to see you derive a theory of neural function from basic physics. I think that will be your project for this seminar."
"Ma'am?"
She'll get me...And my little dog too...Glance over for support to his friend...One of the very few...Xavier Francis, seated next to him...
"Mr. Montaine, I haven't forgotten you..." freezing look as the said Montaine...A tall, well-built blonde, blue-eyed type paused in his relaxing, thinking he'd escaped destruction. "Please rise and give us a counter to Mr. Stein's proposal. Just an outline, please...As you'll be working on a rebuttal to Mr. Stein's theorizing."
"Uh...Well..." Montaine eyed the professor, a tall, gangly woman in tweed suit, white blouse, sensible shoes, tightly bunned black hair...The image of her older second cousin, the famed actress Margaret Hamilton...And whom the men of Princeton had made the butt of endless sexist jokes since her arrival...But whose mysterious allure had nearly every one of them, and most of the faculty, both fascinated and intimidated.
Heck, it's the Wicked Witch for Christsakes...Who couldn't help wondering, in the privacy of his...And not a few hers... Own thoughts just how good... "Wicked"...Could be?
After all, figure wasn't bad, if her dowdy suit left much to the imagination...The hair under that tight bun was rather silky...And God, those piercing eyes that bore though a guy's soul...
"Mr. Montaine?"
Uh... "I guess...Uh...There's more things in Heaven and Earth...?" he tried.
She nodded, a bit surprised... "Very good...The Humanities still have something to offer, I see." Shrewd smile. "Well, that'll do for a quick summary of your position...Try to flesh it out a bit over the semester with a little science. If you can tear yourself away from Mr. Shakespeare."
"Yes, professor..." he sat... Grins about him, but nothing too humiliating...In fact...Mostly appreciative...He gave a grateful smile toward the professor who had moved on immediately...
Stein frowning...
She certainly let him off easy...
"'...more things in Heaven and Earth...' my ass...The monkey in a billion who typed 'Hamlet'..." he noted to Francis.
"Mr. Stein...You have more to contribute?" cold tone.
He sighed, but sensing a bit of derision directed at him from various sources was determined to assert his superior position.
The dope just threw that in, for crying out loud...
"Frank..." Warning hiss from his fellow student and roommate, Xavier Francis...
"I don't find that a very scientific viewpoint..." Stein asserted, boldly.
"No...Mr. Stein? Well?" Dr. Fowler smiled.
"No, doctor...There's no science in it at all, just a vague claim there's more than science can account for..."
"Glad to see you get the meaning of the quote...Well, tell me, Mr. Stein..." she pushed glasses on nose. "Can we account for the general state of the universe using Newtonian physics?"
"Well...Yes...Certainly..."
"And Newtonian physics is in fact a solid, verifiable system...We can experimentally test it, we know how to describe it in mathematical terms...Correct?"
"Of course...It's a thoroughly scientific view of the universe...No nonsense or reliance on fairy tales and vague statements from poets."
"Why then are you studying quantum physics, Mr. Stein? Why not concentrate in the solid and practical ground of Newtonian physics...Experimentally verifiable Physics. Where the theory is tried and true and tested...Solid as a rock, eh ya?" New England twang at end...
"We need quantum theory to understand...Things..." Stein, sinking feeling...
"Yes?" smile...
"Things not explained by Newtonian physics...The nature of the universe as it exists in reality as opposed to an ideal fixed state. But we can do thought experiments, mathematical models, and even practical experiments in quantum theory."
"And yet quantum theory attempts to cover a huge area in Physics that Newtonian, rock-solid physics is simply not up to in explaining the true nature of the universe, correct? While as yet lacking physical tools for experimentation in many aspects? Ergo, Mr. Montaine's position, while not exactly scientific, is nonetheless, valid?"
"It could be..." Stein sighed.
"Thank you, Horatio." Dr. Fowler smiled gently, to chuckles...Stein taking seat...
"However, your position also has the merit of dealing in fundamentals. And I happen to like fundamentals, so long they are not taken to." Kindly smile. "I'll look forward to see your respective approaches, gentlemen. Now, getting back to the consideration of multiple neuronal firings in a synchronized bundle format..."
...
Class dismissed and students beginning to rise, young Stein was still rather intent on defending his position...
"I still say..." Stein began, to his friend, Xavier Francis... "There's no reason to go skinny-dipping in the lesser, so-called sciences for answers that Physics can provide..."
"Francis...You can't simply dismiss..." Xavier began, sighing...
"Nice job, Poindexter..." Montaine, in passing... "I oughta kick your skinny ass..."
"As if you know the Bard, Dobie Gillis!" Stein, fuming... "What book of Cliff Notes did you lift from this time!"
"Tell it to the other nancy boy, Limey..." Montaine, airily... "Outta my way, Moronowitz..." he shoved a small, dark, rather intense, and if slight, still rather good-looking...In a dark, intense way, student in his path aside...
"It's Horowitz, Montaine!" Horowitz glared. Picking himself up from the seat he'd fallen into.
"Horowitz, Moronowitz, Boronowitz...Meinken, Schmeinken...Yous New Yorkars is all alike to me..." Montaine, chuckling as he strolled off, several mates joining in...
"The master race of blonde, blue-eyed Morlocks has spoken..." Stein fumed.
"Got that right!" Montaine, cheerily...
"Too stupid, don't waste your time, Stein..." Horowitz shook head.
"Lets be clear, Leonard...I'm not defending you per se..." Stein, insistent. "I just wanted to make a point."
"Thanks..." Horowitz nodded. "She kicked your skinny little ass, tin man. By the way..."
"Wasn't she great?" Xavier beamed.
"Excuse me? I was the one who stood up for Physics today, sir..." Stein fumed.
"And went down like the Hindenberg." Leonard Horowitz smiled. "Speaking of which, did we notice our fair lady was wearing those silk stockings and clearly had the skirt up a quarter of an inch...?"
"Oh...I don't see why you can't resist the urge to leer at someone outside the normal realm of existence...."Stein glared. "Dr. Fowler may be wrong here and she is...But there's no need to take that tone..."
"What 'tone', Eton's reject...?"
"Very funny...I wasn't rejected from Eton...I was told I was far too intelligent...Which I was."
Xavier looking around room...Ah...There she is...
"God, what happened to your Limey genes?" Horowitz grinned at Stein. "I thought it was the dream of each and every young Brit to get kicked around the playing fields and find some poor weedy underclassman to do the same with in senior year."
"Fortunately, having an American mother, I escaped that fate...Though rather a case of frying pan to the fire in the benighted halls of American academe..." Stein noted. "So, old man...Still trying to see if you can cram a sliver or two of diluted science on the cheap in among all those numbers and debit sheets? Or is it simply the call of allure that keeps you coming to the wrong side of campus?"
"My major is business psychology, Francis..." Horowitz, precisely. "And yes, I am interested in the science, I happen to be working toward my doctorate, too, you know, plus I have to take electives...And I'm fully capable of understanding the course, I'm doing quite well."
"The power of the Wicked's allure..." Stein sniffed... "Even the elderly are stirred..."
"Some of us had to work after undergrad, Stein...I'm only six years older than you..." Horowitz fumed.
"Margaret's here..." Xavier, oblivious to the conversation of his friends...
"She is...?" Horowitz a bit nervous....
Oh...He stared to see Xavier's young friend...A tall, brown-haired, curly-headed girl with wide smile coming over to them, in green sweater, tawny blouse, and camel-colored skirt ...
That Margaret...
Not that she's not a pleasant sight to see...But...One was hoping, just possibly...He glanced to the now empty podium...
"Expecting the WW to come swooping in on broomstick to carry her monkey off, were we?" Stein grinned.
"Fellas..." Xavier had turned back to them, ready to accept accolades for his securing the admittedly, by group consensus, prettiest girl on campus this year...Blanching a bit...
"Broomsticks, Mr. Stein..." Dr. Fowler's unmistakable New England accent... "Are aerodynamically unstable. I'd use a jet pack, myself..."
"I saw that in Popular Science..." Xavier, eagerly...
"Mr. Horowitz, how are we?" she smiled at Leonard...
"I..." Leonard blinked...Trembling visibly...
Hmmn...Xavier eyeing Stein...Stein rolling eyes...
Thank God he wore dark pants today...
"Leonard...? You really need to see someone about that nervousness of yours..." Dr. Fowler sighed. "Shyness is all very well, even rather...Charming..." smile. "But, really, you can't go through life like this. Mr. Francis tells me you have quite the patter when not paralyzed."
"He's fine around guys...And some women he knows well..." Xavier, quickly...
"Hey..." young Margaret had reached them...A bit intimidated to see the famed Dr. Fowler among them. "Dr. Fowler, hello..."
"Miss Sullivan..." nod. "So it's just strong women who cause these panic attacks, Leonard?" she returned to Horowitz who was desperately seeking an escape, with wry smile...
"How was class?" Xavier, to young Margaret, kissing her on cheek.
"Shakespearian...Naturally..." she beamed. "We did 'Merchant of Venice'...I read Antonio in class..."
" 'In sooth I know not why I am so sad...It wearies me...You say it wearies you...'" Stein quoted.
"Very good, Francis..." Margaret beamed.
"I've been interested in conditions like yours for some time now, Leonard..." Dr. Fowler was saying to a rather distressed Horowitz. "And you are by far the most extreme case I've encountered..."
"While we don't go up and down London, reciting sonnets...When raised in England it's hard to escape the playwright/corn dealer..." Stein shrugged.
"I'm afraid it isn't in Canada..." Xavier sighed. "But I have been learning..."
"Worthless diversion of your limited resources, Xavier..." Stein shook head.
"Francis..." Margaret frowned. "I think it broadens the mind to study things outside your own field. Good for you, Xav..." she beamed.
"I'd like you to agree to a few sessions sometime...Perhaps over summer? You work in New York and Boston, during the summer, correct?" Dr. Fowler, rather eagerly. "You'd be doing me...and my work, a great favor, Leonard. And I believe I would be a very good choice for you, as a therapist."
"Uh..." Leonard choked out...
"Doctor..." Xavier had slipped over. "I think he's really getting to a danger point...If you don't mind, it's sheer necessity. You better hurry, Leonard."
"Oh, by all means...But I would like to talk a bit more after you evacuate your bladder, Leonard." She noted. Leonard hurrying off...
"Sweet fellow..." she noted to Francis with smile. "I hope he'll consider my offer...For his own good..."
"It's nice of you to take an interest..." Margaret smiled. "It's hard to believe a sharp business guy like Leonard has such trouble dealing with women..."
"Not that surprising...Women are very strange creatures..." Stein noted, a bit smugly.
"Right, 'enry 'iggins..." Margaret patted him...Dr. Fowler eyeing him...
"Dr. Higgins has a point..." Stein shrugged. "If you people would be more like us...Say the way Dr. Fowler here is..."
"Francis!" Margaret glared...
"Quite all right...Do go on, Mr. Stein..." Dr. Fowler, sly smile...
"...well..It's just...Things would be easier. Less complicated." Stein, hesitant.
"Well, one could take that as an advanced attitude toward equality of the sexes..." Dr. Fowler, shrewd grin...
"Oh...I hardly meant that..." Stein, anxiously.
"In which case we see another example of delayed emotional development much like Mr. Horowitz's only different in outcome..." benign smile. "Ummn...Mr. Francis? He is coming back?" slight urgency in tone.
"I think so, I was supposed to take him to the train...He's going home to New York for the weekend. It's really not so bad with him as it was, doctor. He's seeing a girl back home..." Xavier paused at Dr. Fowler's stare.
"Is he?" definite, if immediately repressed note of despair... "And he can...Function...With her?"
"She's extremely unchallenging...So yes, as to a degree of verbal communication and interaction." Stein shrugged. "As to coitus and so forth, no data available as yet from..."
"Francis!" Margaret, Xavier...
"Not at all, most interesting..." Dr. Fowler... "From a clinical point of view, of course..."
"He does seem to be able to talk to her a little without running for the bathroom...They've dated a few times..." Xavier, cluelessly...As Margaret eyed Dr. Fowler...
Leonard is, after all...Rather a cute lil' feller...Even handsome, in his short lil' way...A sort of tiny John Garfield...
And an older student, only what, ten or eleven years younger than her...?
And she has been very nice to him, ever since he fled the class when she called on him and Xav explained to her he wasn't being funny or insulting...She's avoided pressing him and takes his class answers in writing. Always tries to talk to him...
Now that would be something...Xavier's lil' friend and the Wicked Witch of the East...
Who actually does have something, no doubt about it, even bound up in that plain suit and hair bun...
Even Xav was drooling a bit over her early on in the class...Kept going on about her eyes...
God, anything would be better than that gold-digging tramp who's latched on to the poor guy...And Leonard obviously likes her...Only times he panicks are with girls he likes
Gotta tell Xav what I heard her say about holding her nose sometimes to get ahead the other night Leonard took us all out ...God, the dumb thing actually thought I'd agree with her. Coulda smacked her right there and then...
"Amazing the aphoristic effect of a hefty bank account on some women...But, Horowitz is the type to go for that sort..." Stein cut in with Xavier and Dr. Fowler...Both regarding him.
"Oh?" Dr. Fowler, a bit coldly...
"Not a man of Science like us...Well, a person of Science, doctor..."
"Mr. Stein...While no one respects Science more than myself, you need to learn that all human knowledge does not reside there."
"Back to Montaine and his second –rate Shakespeare..." frown. "I'm not closed off to Shakespeare...And a few other influences...Asimov, for example."
"Francis is very fond of science-fiction." Xavier, helpfully.
"And makes a mean omelette..." Margaret grinned. "Which did catch me by surprise."
"In England one either learns to cook for oneself a little or one is condemned to hell...My mother taught me a few things." Stein, shrugging.
"Is Mr. Horowitz all right, you think?" Dr. Fowler asked, a tad anxiously...
"I'll go and see..." Xavier offered.
"Doctor, you really aren't required to concern yourself with students' well being..." Stein began... "An intellect like yours needs to reserve itself for higher things...I would really suggest you abandon your dabbling in Psychology and..."
Hmmn...Xavier eyed Stein... "Why don't you come with me, Francis? You can tell me about your new thought experiment..." Anxious glance to Margaret...
And avoid more comments that could get you booted out of an elective you need. Given almost no one out of the Physics department will tolerate you in their class for long.
"Why are you always interrupting me just when I'm making progress impressing Dr. Fowler..." Stein hissed to Francis, annoyed as they headed out.
"Francis Stein really admires you...As does my Mr. Francis." Margaret, rather desperately... Dr. Fowler giving wry smile...
"The young bucks always go for the strong filly they think can protect them in a crisis, young lady. Whatever noises they make about needing nothin' and no one...Even our 'tin man' Mr. Stein..." shrewd grin, wink.