"What a thing,
to be both starving and empty.
To ache for love-
to take scraps from it's table,
and yet, run sickly from the feast." -LOVE DISORDERS AND OTHER OLD HEARTACHES
Stain this, Stain that. Convictions. Firepower.
He was seriously pissing me off. He stabbed me, almost cut Father, cut Kurogiri and cut Y/N. All in my bar. My league. Shoving my hands in my pockets and removing Father from my face, I trudged upstairs. Blood tickled my arm as it flowed from my shoulder, which had just healed. It soaked the sleeve and dripped from the fabric onto the steps, like clockwork.
Y/N has stitched me up before, she'll do it again, hopefully. She seemed uncharacteristically angry today with Stain. Not teasing, not aggravated, furious. Like she'd kill the Hero Killer if he took one wrong step, without hesitation. It was weird. I still felt awkward, even months later, about that shit I pulled after USJ, taking her hand or whatever. I still don't know why I did it, she was just warm. Safe. And I sound like a fucking baby when I talk like that. Gross.
"Y/N." I said, knocking on her door. I heard the door unclick and I walked in. She was sitting cross-legged on her bed reading, changed into shorts and a tank top, bandages covering her arm where Stain cut her. She shook her head, smirking, and slid off her bed, grabbing a first-aid kit from her bureau. I sat on her bed.
"Oh no, bucko. You're on the floor. You're not bleeding all over my bed." She gently pushed me off the bed and onto her floor, and I hissed in pain, holding my arm. Kneeling on the floor beside me, she tugged on my shirt sleeve. "Shirt. Off."
I quickly averted my eyes, but slowly pulled off my shirt. She took it from me, tossing it by the now-closed door. I met her eyes and her face was pink, but she just laughed.
"I'm going to jack up these stitches, just so you know." Crawling around me so my back was to her, she gently touched the area around the wound. "They're not going to be straight, I'm not that good."
I barely resonated with what Y/N was saying. A weird burning warmth had washed over me, and my stomach felt off, like I was sick, but...I wasn't. I could feel the heat radiating off my face, and her fingers were warm as she cleaned up the excess blood around the wound and down my arm. What I was feeling felt like what Kurogiri told me once...about people finding other people attractive, and liking them, as childish as it sounds, and about sex and all that stuff. I knew what I was feeling, but why with Y/N?
"This is going to hurt." She warned, voice soft at my ear since her head was so close to my shoulder, and I almost turned to look at her, but I stared straight ahead as a stinging solution was poured on and dabbed at my wound, gritting my teeth and ignoring the pain as it basically numbed my shoulder. Y/N moved quickly, stitching it up. I looked back at it, and although clean and well stitched, the line was all jagged, zig zagging.
"Wow, great stitching." I scoffed.
"I said it'd be bad." Y/N chuckled, and her hand touched mine and my heart leapt into my throat.
Y/N
I took his hand as he quickly crossed his pinky over his ring finger and lifted it, so his arm was partially up, which made it easier to wrap up. I looked up and saw that Tenko's pale complexion was flushed, bright red, but I assumed it was from the pain and sat back, drawing my knees to my chest and resting my chin on my knees. My hand still lingered on his, so I went to pull it back, but he touched my palm before I could, freezing me in my tracks. His fingers brushed the skin of my wrist beneath my palm, and shivers were sent down my spine. I took his hand, my fingers lacing with four of his, and I looked at the floor. That warmth was falling over me again, that full-body blush, and I couldn't look at him for more than a few seconds without tearing my eyes away. A chunk of E/C hair fell in my eyes and I went to brush it away, but a hand beat me to it as Tenko tucked it behind my ear. I looked up at him, wide eyed, my heart hammering in my chest.
"You were angry." He suddenly said. "Why?"
"I'm not sure." I replied, cheeks scarlet, blushing like an idiot. "I couldn't do anything when he stabbed you."
"It was his quirk." Tenko stated blatantly. I chuckled.
"I know that, Handsy."
"Then why, Scarface?"
"I don't know."
"You do."
"No, I have seriously no clue what's wrong with me right now, Shimura. Well...I have a clue but it's not anything-"
"Me neither."
"Wha-?"
"I don't know."
Silence fell between us, and my heart was pounding at the idea that he could possibly feel how I do at the moment.
"What were you reading?" Tenko asked. I snorted.
"Since when do you care what I do in my free time?"
"Shut up. I don't." His eyes left mine and looked directly at the floor, cheeks pink, but looked back at me when I exhaled.
"Just poetry." I replied. "Dumb love poems. Pretty cheesy, but entertaining." A shiver ran down my spine as he reached out again, touching the scar on my cheek from the USJ incident. "You okay?"
"I don't think so." He replied absentmindedly. He was in his head, thinking about something. I moved closer to him, fingers brushing over his face. The skin of his lips and under his eyes was dry, but not unpleasant, and felt strange under my touch. Looking back now, we were two kids, pretty broken and probably touch starved, barely adults, with absolutely no idea or experience with romantics or intimacy, and it showed as we curiously touched one another, pushing our comfort zones. "What're you doing, L/N?"
"I-I'm sorry." I went to pull my hands away, the one at his face and the one holding his, but he stopped me.
"Shut up." He scoffed. "Don't apologize." His fingers slowly ran down my cheek and to my neck. "I don't have any idea what in the hell we're doing right now either."
"This is kind of weird." I laughed nervously. He cupped the back of my head and my heart had a field day. I was frozen. "We're villains, but we're...like this."
"Like what?" His husky voice lowered as his hand did, now more at my chin level, just barely cupping my face. I don't even think he was trying to flirt or be seductive, but I could barely breathe. "What are you feeling?"
"I-I don't..." I stuttered, but trailed off as he leaned in a little bit. My eyes were glued to his lips, and how although they look all crusty from afar, they're actually really clean, not flaky or anything. Just dry. I didn't want to move. My eyes flicked up to his, and our lips were centimeters apart, barely brushing, when a knock at the door scared us apart. We scooted away from one another, until I said 'Come in' with a terribly obvious voice crack and coughed. Kurogiri entered, a knowing smirk on his face.
"Hey, what's up?" I asked, trying to mask my embarrassment.
"I was wondering where Shigaraki was," He looked at him, then me, and shrugged. "But I can leave if this isn't a good time."
"No, it's not a good time." Tenko growled as I said the complete opposite, and sent him a death glare.
"It's fine, Kuro. I just finished dressing his wound, is all." I handed Tenko his shirt, avoiding his eyes as he left with Kurogiri. Closing the door after they left, I leaned against it, burying my face in my hands in disbelief. Oh god, what? I totally like Tomura Shigaraki.
I'm so screwed.
.
.
.
The next day was showtime, time to go to Hosu with Stain. I wore a button down tucked neatly into a pleated black skirt, ignoring the vest and tie on my bed. I strapped up my legs with weapons and loosely tied my boots, throwing my hair up and hurrying downstairs. I quickly moved past Tenko, avoiding his eyes although I could feel them boring into me, still embarrassed about yesterday. He was wearing all his hands, not just Father, and I flopped on the couch, trying to act natural and not look at him.
"Time to go." Kurogiri broke the awkward silence.
"Aww, Kuro, but I just woke up." I complained, rubbing my eyes.
"No time." He retorted. "And it's the evening, Y/N. Did you sleep all day?"
"Ah, crap." I yawned, rolling up my sleeves and standing up, entering Kuro's warp gate whilst still trying to actively avoid Tenko's gaze.
"You're casual today," Kuro noted. "No tie or vest?"
"Nah." I smirked. "Felt like a casual day."
The portal opened us back up once we picked up Stain on top of a water tank high above the city, and we stepped out into the light.
"So this is Hosu, huh?" Tenko growled.
"Guess so." I answered on instinct, and he turned his sight to me. Our eyes locked through Father, and I felt my face warm up, thinking of his touch on my face and neck, and quickly looked away again.
"Did something happen? Didn't think she could be this quiet." Stain asked. I rolled my eyes.
"Shut up, you knock-off ninja turtle."
He didn't respond. I thought that was a good one, too.
"I will reform this city, but for that, more sacrifices are needed. That necessary task you mentioned earlier, perhaps...now, you're someone I can actually get through to..." Stain unsheathed one of his swords, words directed at Shigaraki.
"Always picking on me, man." Tenko griped. I held back a chuckle.
"Hero is a title reserved for those who do great deeds, too many are undeserving. Just money worshippers playing hero! Until this society wakes up and corrects itself...I will...continue my word." He continued, dramatically leaping off the water tank, disappearing into the dark.
"Get off your soapbox, dude." I crossed my arms over my head. "It's not like I disagree with everything he said, the money worshipping part was pretty spot on, but...get over yourself."
"I know. All that high and mighty talk when he's not even past the small potatoes stage. It's almost precious how hard he's trying." Tenko scoffed, that crazed look in his eyes. I laughed, imaging Stain as a small potato.
"You both shouldn't criticize him so much." Kurogiri spoke up. "The cities he's appeared in have seen across-the-board drops in crime. Some theorize it is tied to hero awareness."
I sighed.
"Well great, thank you Kurogiri." Tenko replied sarcastically. "So much for putting a stop to heroism! Hero Killer? More like Hero Breeder, at least indirectly! I knew it. We're too different deep down. Kurogiri, bring out all the Nomu. Now. If Stain wants to stab me, he gets what he deserves. If he wants to go on a rampage, let him!"
"Which of us can cause more destruction?" I laughed, and he actually smirked a little under Father, finally locking eyes with me.
"Let's see."
We sat and watched the Nomu tearass around the city, fire erupting across the map.
"Ugh. Endeavor, I'm assuming. Oh, look!" I pointed at the flying Nomu, whom I gave a name to. "It's Nom-Nom!"
"Well done, my Nomu." Tenko muttered.
"I take it you aren't joining the fray, Shigaraki?" Kuro asked.
"Kuro, he's hurt. You watched Stain stab him." I rolled my eyes.
"Then what about you, Y/N?"
"I just like observing. Watching the cards fall where they may." I smiled. "And since both of us are not physically involved, we have the Nomu to take care of that for us."
"By tomorrow morning, everyone will have forgotten about you, Hero Killer!" Tenko added. I laughed.
"Insecure much?"
"Shut the hell up." He growled. Chuckling, I glanced at him. Everything actually felt normal again.
Time passed quickly, as we were just watching. Sightseeing. The boys had binoculars, but if I squint, I can see across Hosu without an issue, the only problem being everyone appears kind of blurry. I was just looking around when something caught my eye.
"Uh, Tomura..?" I asked, wary. "Stain just killed Nom-Nom...and-" my eyes narrowed. "-Izuku Midoriya is there...with Endeavor's kid."
"Hey, hey, hey! What the hell's he doing?!" He ripped the binoculars away from his eyes in disgust. "Why'd he kill the Nomu? Why are the UA brats there? So many questions, so little answers...why isn't anything going my way?!"
.
.
.
We didn't see exactly what happened from where we stood, but we saw the final standoff. Stain rescued Midoriya from Nom-Nom, but began yelling about conviction and how the only hero allowed to kill or beat him was All Might, before he was suddenly just standing unconscious. Apparently, he lived and was brought to Tartarus, but a broken rib punctured his lung.
Tenko was trying to stay calm, but his shaking hands and the crumbled binoculars said otherwise.
"Did you achieve the results you were looking for? Either of you?"
"All depends on tomorrow." We replied in creepy, unplanned unison, then looked at one another, alarmed. Tenko's eyes narrowed.
"I'm not in your head, handyman. Relax." I laughed, defensive. He looked even more alarmed, causing me to laugh harder.
"That's a bit odd, no?" Kurogiri commented as we stepped back into the gate, the chaos of Hosu behind us.