A/N: I strongly encourage you to fully listen to this song after you finish reading this chapter because it's Harry in a NUTSHELLLLLLL!
Also, I'm sorry for the pain... I would say I didn't mean to... but I fully meant to so I won't lie.(:
I dance around the kitchen in his white Kiss tshirt. I have about eighty seven things going on at the exact same time, but it's a good day... It's Thanksgiving, and I haven't celebrated this in over two years. It's not a huge deal, but it's still something to me because he wanted to spend it with me. I told him to just walk in. The past week we've been in and out of each others houses, staying the nights here and there. He always tells me how much he loves it here because it doesn't feel like just a place I'm staying in but an actual home... He says his place isn't really a home in his eyes which hurts my heart a little bit. A soft meow sounds, and I look up to Bowie with a smile as I stand in the kitchen, and he sits on the counter.
"What's cookin good lookin?" I ask him, and he looks unamused. "Alright sour pus, wipe that attitude off your cute little face. We've got company coming, and I expect you to be on your best behavior.. We like him, remember?" I ask him, and he meows.
"Okay geez you don't have to call me out like that... I love him, you like him. Same thing." I shrug, and he stares at me. "Okay I know, not the exact same but... you know what, shut up Bowie." I raise my eyebrows at him, and he lays down now, ignoring me. Sassy pants. I turn up the volume of the music, and move with a smile, knowing he'll be here soon enough. I listen to the music, and dance around the kitchen, and right away I notice the tune of the new song. I want it that way by the backstreet boys. I raise my wisk high in the air only to bring it back down in a victory fist pump. "Oh hell yes."
"Dear god what are you listening to.." I turn around to see Harry leaning against the doorway, and I point my whisk to him, and then bring it close to me, preparing to use it as a microphone. "Please don't... " He shakes his head laughing, meeting me halfway. "Sing anything else, I mean it, any-"
"You are, my fire, the one desire. Believe when I say... I want it that way." I let go of his hand as soon as the beat starts, and do a swift step touch, using the wisk for good as it sits in front of my face.
"But we are two worlds apart, can't reach to your heart, when you say that I want it that way." I point to him, and do a spin, breaking into the chorus.
"Tell me why? Ain't nothin but a heartache, tell me why? Ain't nothin but a mistake. Tell me why? I never wanna hear you say, that I want it that way." I spin around him overdramatically but he catches me by my waist, pulling me straight in.
"This is a fire hazard." He warns me, and I smirk, wiggling my eyebrows.
"What? Me or the food?" I wiggle them some more, and he shakes his head, laughing at me. I pull away from him, and change the song, going back to the stove to make sure the food is actually okay.
"I know I don't have much room to talk considering I don't celebrate this holiday... but I'll be honest I didn't expect to walk into your kitchen and it smell like a mexican restaurant." He tells me, and I look over my shoulder to see him standing at the counter, his hand reaching up to pet Bowie.
"Well normally there's turkey, and mashed potatoes and all that boring stuff." I tell him, turning the stove off.
"And what are we having?" He asks.
"Tacos... duh." I turn back around, coming straight to him. He welcomes me in with a real hug now.
"And why tacos Cherry?" He asks, looking down on me as his arms rest over my shoulder, my arms wrapping around his waist.
"Because they're my favorite food ever... and because I never was one for celebrating this holiday because I had no one to celebrate it with, but now that I do I'm going to do it my way... Who wants to actually celebrate the day that the native americans graciously treated the European swine to a nice dinner only for them to pillage and murder them later on?" I ask sweetly, and he tilts his head down to me.
"Darlene Summers you are truly and honestly one of the weirdest people I think I've ever met, but I adore it." He tells me, and I smile, leaning up on my tip toes. He meets me halfway, kissing my lips, only to receive a meow from beside us. I break from him, and point straight at Bowie.
"Bowie Summers watch your mouth. If I want to kiss Harry Styles in every room in this apartment I will, do you understand me?" I warn him, and he stands up, and turns himself around to face away from us. "Important question." I pull Harry's attention back to me, and he raises his eyebrows, waiting for me to ask. "Actually, I'm not going to ask you... Just say yes." I tell him, and he furrows his eyebrows at me.
"I don't think that sounds reasonable or safe." He challenges, and I smile.
"Well in a normal situation it probably wouldn't be, but for my benefit, and yours say yes." I push on, and he smiles.
"Alright yes... Now tell me what I just agreed to." He laughs, tightening his arms around my back.
"Watching Disney movies with me while I force you to help me paint my nails... Normally I make Bowie help me but he's very bad at it." I tell him, and he laughs.
"Well I would assume so considering-"
"Do not say because he's a cat, I know he is a cat, but he's a special cat and-"
"I was going to say because he doesn't have opposable thumbs." He corrects me, and I smile. "I have no opposition, but I do get to know what movies you're making me watch." He speaks out, and I smile.
"Lilo and Stitch, it's Bowie's favorite... Then whatever your favorite is, and then the best disney movie ever created Tangled." I tell him, and he thins his eyes.
"The Lion King is by far better than Tangled." He challenges, and my jaw drops.
"I'm going to need you to take that back right this instant Harry Styles." I raise my brows as a warning, and he smiles.
"Or else what?" He challenges, and I open my mouth to speak but the front door opens. Both of our heads turn to the front door, and Sandy walks through with a dish in her hands.
"Oh hell yes, what a good surprise. How are you?" She asks Harry as she walks into the kitchen, setting the dish on the counter.
"I'm lovely, thank you... And you're doing well I assume?" He asks.
"I'm running late, but I will call you later to get the inside scoop on all of this understood?" She asks me now, and I nod. "Wear protection, happy thanksgiving, Bye!" She walks past us, and I ignore her words, walking towards the dish as she walks back out the front door.
"She does this every year too.. Since we met she did. Sandy loves to cook for any occasion. She always bakes me something really good on Thanksgiving." I tell him, opening the dish to see some type of cobbler inside.
"I used to work in a bakery.." He tells me, and I look up at him.
"You're lying..." I thin my eyes at him, and he shakes his head.
"Back in Holmes Chapel I did... It was sweet that bakery.. I think you'd love it." He tells me, and it's weird thinking of him working in a small bakery in the middle of England somewhere. It's odd to think of him as anything but exactly what he is right now.
"I used to work in a record store..." I tell him, and he smiles, looking down to his hand as it rests on the counter.
"That doesn't surprise me... You seem like the type." He tells me as I start plating food, knowing it won't compare to the food he cooks, but it might come close. I can cook a badass taco.
"I seem like the type? What else do I seem like the type for?" I ask him, and hand him a plate, moving to walk towards the dining table. He takes it with a smile.
"You seem like the type that's always barefoot because you don't like shoes... the type that likes to watch those awful hallmark movies but never admit to it... You seem like the type that already has her kids names picked out and has since she was sixteen... You also seem like the type who loves heights." He finishes, and the last one throws me off.
"Loves heights?" I ask, and he nods, digging into his food just as I am. "Why heights?" I ask, and he smiles.
"I love the feeling of control... You love the feeling of not being in control... It scares you a bit but you embrace it Cherry. So when you're up high, you're above everything else, looking overtop you feel like you're on top of the world. You crave the feeling of openness, and that little bit of uncertainty that's in your chest when you're up so high because it makes you feel like you're alive.. In control but not at the same time." He tells me, and he's right, I do love that feeling.
"You like that feeling too... Because of your special spot." I tell him, and he nods.
"But I love it for different reasons...." He tells me, and he's right. We don't look at control in the same way.. We're so similar but at the same time we're far from it. "Darlene Summers, this is by far the best taco I've ever eaten. I swore I was going to have to do all the cooking up until today." He tells me as he points to his taco. I scoff, and look at him with an open mouth.
"I am a very good cook. Thank you very much... You just wouldn't know because you're a control freak, and have to do it yourself every single time we're together." I tell him.
"I cook for you because I like to take care of you Cherry." He tells me, and I smile.
"Okay you win." I pick up my food again, and eat, finishing the rest of my plate, and beforeI can even start to clean up he takes my plate and starts cleaning it for me.
"You do my dishes, I do yours." He smirks, and I smile. When is this going to get bad? When is there going to be a moment where I'm sad, or not happy, or he doesn't make me smile? There hasn't been a single moment yet, and most people would jump for joy but it scares the hell out of me because- "What are you thinking about?" He asks, taking my hand to bring me from the kitchen.
"Oh, just England and stuff.." I lie, and cringe once I hear him sigh.
"You're lying to me..." He flips his voice up, and I sigh. "Tell me..." He mumbles, sitting himself on the couch as I go to grab my nail polish.
"I just get in my head sometimes... Everything is so different with you, and I always wonder when... When things will change or get bad.." I admit to him. He gives me a soft sympathetic look, and I shake my head. "Don't look at me like that... I know you're nothing like him. You've never been like him, and I don't see you ever turning into someone like him, but it's only normal for me to assume that it's not always going to be like this, and-"
"Be like what.." He asks.
"Like we're always together... Like I'm happy and smiling, and always doing something that makes me feel good. Like you constantly doing things that just make me wonder how you're even real... I just don't understand how I can go from a relationship that was so bad for me... Something where I wasn't getting anything near what I deserved to something like this where you constantly put me first... You care more than anyone in my life.." I tell him, spilling my heart out.
"I think... I think it's only natural for both of us to constantly wait for something bad to happen... I do it too. We're used to it... Right when everything is great it instantly gets bad, but don't you think it's fair that we both give it a chance to be good instead of waiting for it to get bad?" He asks, and once again he's opened my eyes.
"I've spent almost five months being around you, and..." I let myself drop off, not wanting to finish the complete thought.
"Does it feel like you don't... like you don't see your normal days feeling normal anymore..." He tells me, and completes my thoughts.
"Like simple tasks like making the bed, or cooking dinner are so much more fun now..." I look at him from the side, and he nods.
"Paint my nails." He changes the subject and I look at him.
"Wait really?" I ask, and he nods. "Has anyone done your nails before?" I ask, and he shrugs.
"As a joke here and there, but I actually like it.." He smiles, and I do too.
"What color?" I ask, and he looks between the two of us.
"Pink, and blue." He smiles at his hands, and I take his hand, pulling the colors from the bin by my side. He uses his free hand, clicking on the tv, going to the movies. "Bowie! We're watching your favorite so you better come in here!" He calls out, and I think my face hurts from how wide I'm smiling as I focus on his hand. Bowie comes in minutes later, and jumps up on the arm of the couch, soon walking down, and moving on Harry's lap. I watch him carefully, and Harry looks down on him, Bowie looking up. "Hey don't look at me like that... What does that look mean? Is that a bad look?" He asks me, and I laugh.
"It's not... I think he loves you." I smile, and Harry brings his free hand down, running it through his fur.
Bowie ended up falling asleep right as soon as his movie started so we decided to just move on to The Lion King, and I finished his nails. He loved them too which made me happy. I asked Dean if he could paint my nails at one point and he said that it was girly... Girly to help me paint mine. I don't even want to know what he would have said if I asked to paint his like this. But that's the thing about Harry, he doesn't care about what's considered feminine and masculine. He sees it all the same. He does what he wants, and it's sweet. He really does love the Lion King though because he refused to paint my nails until the credits were rolling. He also sang every single word.
"I'm honestly surprised you don't love Tangled more I feel like it's.." I notice his face as I start clicking to turn it on, and I gasp loudly. "You've never seen it have you!" I jump on my knees, and he cringes.
"I thought you would never know... You're getting good at reading me Cherry, and I don't think I like it." He smiles, and I grab his hands.
"You're going to freaking LOVE IT!" I jump again, and Bowie gets up. "Bowie!!!!! Tell him!" Bowie rubs his face against Harry's arm, looking for attention and I scoff. "Excuse me... You little attention seeker." I grab him, and place him on my lap, sitting down. "I'm painting my own nails, you need to watch, no arguments." I smile, taking the blue nail polish from his hands. The movie starts, and I smile at the opening credits, mouthing the words as I focus on my nails, loving every bit of this, and he watches quietly beside me.
"Do you know every word to this movie?" He asks, and I look up to see him looking at me.
"I do.." I smile, and place my finger on his chin, turning his face to the screen again. He continues watching, and I continue painting, and watching him, seeing his smile break during certain points, watching him enjoy the masterpiece.
"You know what?" He asks after we're halfway through.
"What? Has your favorite movie changed?" I ask, and he shrugs.
"I need to see the ending to decide that but.. You remind me of her..." He tells me, pointing to the screen.
"Rapunzel? Really?" I ask, blowing on my nails, and he nods.
"Even down to her pet frog." He jokes, and I thin my eyes.
"He's a chameleon.." I correct him, and he smiles.
"You're proving my point." He mumbles, and I look at the screen.
"This part is important!!! Look!" I tell him as they move into the town, the music building up. I love this part, I love seeing her experience the new place, and all the new people. Her dancing around, and forcing Flynn to do the same thing. He enjoys it though, even if he pretends not to. I see what he means though... The aspect of her being locked away, and made to believe the world was an awful place when in reality it's not... I believed that, I thought it for years, and then it all changed... He's just like Flynn too. Someone who's been misunderstood, someone who's looked for and sought after for all the wrong reasons.
He dragged me out of my shelter, he showed me the world he saw, and made me see a new life too... I catch him in my vision, and he's staring in my direction.
"Harry Styles... You're not watching the movie." I mumble, keeping my eyes on the film. He turns his attention with a lazy grin on his lips. They both get in the boats, and I fall in love every single time this scene happens. My favorite part... When Rapunzel gets nervous and scared that she'll be empty after seeing the lights, and Flynn looks at her with so much confidence, telling her that she can find a new dream now... I find myself watching Harry now as he sits up, staring at the screen, the dim lights around us. The lanterns start to light, and he's captivated now. This is where they fall in love, this is where they realize they're each other's new dreams....
Harry holds his head with his hand, looking at the screen with a daze, his eyes slowly glossing over, and he seems like the person who'd cry as people fall in love around him. He loves love...
"Stop staring at me Darlene Summers.." He mumbles, wiping under his eyes as he watches, and I smile, wrapping my arms around his shoulders.
"I'm sorry, I'm sorry... You're just kind of cute." I smile. I can't believe I never saw the similarities in their story compared to ours... We're all the same in some ways... I wonder if he sees that similarity too or if it's just me. We watch through the end of the movie, and he shakes his head as the credits roll, looking down to his feet, and then back up to me.
"You're just like her... Almost a carbon copy." He tells me, and I smile.
"Is it because I have a sidekick pet, and pretty blonde hair?" I ask, and he shakes his head.
"It's because you dream to conquer the world, and you let fear get in the way... but when you finally let yourself you end up more beautiful, and full of life than you already were... You take the tiny little things, and make them larger than life..." He tells me, and I smile.
"You're kind of like Flynn.." I tell him, and he furrows his brows.
"His name is Eugene..." He corrects me and I scoff.
"Well I'm sorry I didn't know I was talking to the name police." I raise my hands, and he raises his eyebrows.
"His name is Eugene, that's what she calls him... I'm just stating the facts, and for someone who claims to love this movie so much you should know that." He challenges, and I roll my eyes.
"What are you going to do about it?" I ask, and he smiles.
"Give you the smoulder." He jokes, and gives me a silly look, trying to mimic Flynn. God I love him... I love him so damn much... "I think it is my new favorite... Not just because of the movie but because you love it so much too... And how much she reminds me of you.." He tells me, and I smile. "Another one.. Come on." He pulls me forward, and lays back. He lays flat, his head propped up with a pillow. I lay on my stomach, between his legs, my head pressed to his chest, my arms wrapped around him. He turns on The Little Mermaid, another one of his favorites apparently, and I love this. I love how this day went more than any day so far. My eyes got heavy, and I assume his did too. We could've moved to the bed, but everything was just too perfect how it was...
*PLAY SONG NOW*
I wake up with a jolt, and I'm up instantly, sitting up only to see Harry pushing himself up too, gasping for air, his eyes wide with fear. Oh no... no no no, this can't happen to him. No...
"Harry... Hey, you just woke up from a nightmare... It's okay.." I try to come towards him, trying to make myself known, knowing that when you wake up in that state it's hard to remember who's around, and where you are. He hides his face, covering himself from me, and i'm not sure if he's crying, or if he's just freaked out, but seeing him like this hurts... Now I know what he was talking about.
"Please don't... I don't want you, I understand now, I don't want you to see me like this, please..." He mumbles helplessly, and I've never heard his voice so shaken, and unsure.
"I'm not going anywhere... It's not a big deal Harry, please just breathe for a second. Tell me, talk to me.." I mumble. "Look at me..." I reach for him, but he pushes himself up off the couch, and starts for his shoes, pulling them onto his feet.
"I can't, I.. I can't right now Darlene, I can't tell you, I can't talk about this, this... I just can't." He rambles like a mad man and I could actually punch him right now.
"Harry stop.. Harry stop!" I raise my voice as he stands fully again, grabbing his keys. "Harry talk to me!" I raise my voice more, and I see him shaking his head, his breath still shaky.
"I can't! I can't talk to you when it's about you." He speaks sharply, and for some reason I feel a huge burst of anger at him, and that sentence.
"You can't drive like this! Do you know how dangerous that would be?" I ask, and he continues to walk to the door.
"It doesn't matter right now." He whispers, reaching for the door.
"Harry Styles, stop walking right now! Stop it right now! I'm not dealing with this closed off bullshit right now! If you walk out of that door right now, so help me god I will get in that car with you!" I yell, and he stops moving.
"Darling.." He hangs his head, but I don't let up.
"No, don't Darling me. I know what it's like, I know exactly how you're feeling, and you're trying to shut me out, and I'm not going to let you. Turn around." I keep my voice strong and steady, but as soon as he turns around I don't expect what comes next. He melts into me, covering his face as he cries. I wrap my arms around him, and I feel sick to my stomach with worry. What in the world tore him up this much?
"I'm sorry.. Please don't be mad at me.." He speaks softly, and I shake my head, pushing one of my hands through his hair, the other running up his back.
"No baby, no I'm not mad at you, you just scared me..." I whisper, my brows knitted together in concern. "How about we go to bed, and I'll get you some water, and you can talk to me yeah?" I ask, and he nods against me. I pull back, and look at him but he just shakes his head, placing the heels of his hands to his eyes to rid them of tears.
"Fuck..." He mutters, and I take his hand, pulling him to my room. He sits down on my bed, and Bowie jumps right up, moving straight to his lap. "Hey buddy..." He mumbles softly, running his hands through Bowie's fur, and I smile despite the heavy feeling in the room.
"I'll be right back-"
"Don't go... I don't need water right now, I need you.." He tells me, and I don't hesitate to move back to him. Bowie moves, and we both sit up in the bed, Bowie laying between us. Harry criss crosses his legs, and I do the same as I sit with him. "I've never had that happen to me..." He tells me, and I nod.
"I can tell..." I tell him.
"It's really not fun... I understand now.." He tells me, and I give a soft frown.
"What happened? What's going on that would cause that.... You said it was about me, is it... is it because you're bringing me home, or-"
"Yes...No... I don't... I don't know... I don't know how to explain it, I don't understand it myself really." He tells me, and he doesn't look at me.
"Just talk to me.." I speak softly, and my hand grasps his. Our fingers tangle, and he toys with them, staring at my fingers in his softly.
"I can't just talk.. I really can't. I'm trying my best, and it's so hard every single day trying to be as open as you are with me Darling, it's awful, and I know I seem put together like someone who knows what they want when they want it, but I'm not. I'm not always happy, and I'm not always sure of myself..." He tells me, and I shake my head.
"You sound like you're defending yourself to me, and you don't have to do that... You have this habit of pretending you're okay, and making yourself seem happy to the people you don't have to pretend in front of. I'm not some pap with a camera, or a fan, or some tv show host. I'm Darling... I'm Cherry, I'm blue, you're pink... You're Harry... It's not simple, but it's not hard either... It's somewhere in between when you stop treating the ones that you care about like you treat the ones who pretend to care about you." I tell him, and he sighs. "And you don't need to be as open as me...I don't need that. I need you to be as open as you can whenever you feel right doing it.." I tell him.
"I was drowning..." He tells me, and I shake my head.
"What?" I ask, and he shakes his head, looking down still.
"In my dream..." He tells me, and I understand now. "I don't know what it means, I have no idea... You were at the piano in this room, and then you got up, and you left, and you slammed the door, and you didn't tell me why, and... and I moved to the piano, and... and then next thing I knew I was drowning, and I couldn't breath, I could hardly see. I didn't know what to do... but none of that makes sense.. I've never felt so out of control..." He opens up fully now, and my heart sinks.
"Have... Have you ever broken up with anyone besides Alyssa?" I ask, and he shakes his head. "But you've been broken up with?" He nods, and I press my lips together.
"If you're going to tell me that I'm afraid of being hurt, or that I'm afraid of being broken up with I already know, you don't have to say it..." He speaks in a low voice, and he still won't look at me.
"I could say that I'm... I'm not going anywhere.." I tell him softly, and he looks up to me, his eyes glossy, but very beautiful. "I think I'd be very sad without someone bugging me about my favorite color every day... Um.. I can't say the words forever, because I don't know.. I don't even know what happens tomorrow... but I can say the words as long as we're meant to be.." I tell him. He still doesn't look convinced despite my words, but I don't know what else to say. "Talk to me Harry..." I speak in the softest voice I can.
"I mess things up... I do the wrong thing every single time. I hold my breath, or I jump the gun. I run too fast, or I don't move at all. I don't know what I'm doing right now, and it's working... But what if I never find out what I'm doing, and I lose it... I lose what I'm doing right now. I don't know what makes you happy, or what makes you feel good, and bad. I try to watch you and to figure it out, but it's hard to see." He tells me, and I shrug.
"I like long hugs... Really long hugs that make me feel safe.. I like when you ask me what my favorite color is... I like that you never know, but you always have your trunk cleared for my bike... I like that you never question the weird things I do... I like the fact that you show me that you care by not caring... Not caring where I go, or what I do as long as I'm happy doing it. I like it when you give me your shirts, and I like it when I get... when I get to fall asleep next to you. I like when you run circles over my skin, and when you kiss my knuckles... I like when you kiss me, no matter what way you do it. I just like you... Nothing needs to be different than exactly how it is right now...:" I speak truthfully, and he sighs.
"I'm scared..." I can tell that just speaking the words scares him.
"I know..." I try to be as comforting as I can with my voice.
"I'm so scared I'm going to do something to lose you Darling... I.. I.." He stutters, and I run my hands over his legs, giving him a soft touch wherever I can.
"You what?" I ask, and he doesn't reply at first.
"I.... Nevermind.." He sighs, and I don't push him, knowing I have pushed him enough as
it is. "Does that not scare you?" He asks, and I furrow my brows. "The thought of someone being scared to lose you?" He clarifies, and I shake my head.
"Not when I feel the exact same way... Not at all.." I tell him truthfully. "Do you want to know what the worst thing about nightmares is? The fact that when you're in them you feel like you'll never get out... Like it's the end of the world..Do you want to know what the best part is?" I ask, and he nods. "The fact that you did get out of them... The fact that there's a new day just on the other side of every bad dream... The fact that most of the time, your nightmare isn't going to be a reality now or ever..." I tell him. "You told me to not focus on what could happen when we could be focusing on right now... Take your own advice, it's pretty good." I tell him, and he just looks at me.
"I'm sorry..." He speaks softly.
"Don't be sorry for having emotion... Be sorry when you have something to be sorry for.." I tell him, and reach forward. My hand grazes his face, my thumb over his cheek bone. "Do you want to know what always makes me feel better?" I ask, and he just looks at me. "What's your favorite color today?" I ask, and he gives the lightest smile, almost like it's not even there in the first place.
"Blue..." He speaks softly, and looks straight at me, and I bring myself to him. He sits straight on the bed, his legs out. I wrap my legs around his waist, and hug myself to him, holding him tightly, clinging to his body. "Don't let me drown Darling..." He mumbles softly, and my heart shatters in pieces.
"We'll keep each other afloat... Sound like a deal?" I ask, my voice muffled.
"Yeah... It sounds like what I need." He tells me honestly. "Can I kiss you?" He asks sweetly, and I peel back, taking his cheeks in my hands, doing it for him. I kiss his wet lips, feeling how cold they are right now. He's more hesitant than normal, but not too hesitant. He's still sure in his kiss, and it reassures me. It makes me feel reassured, and satisfied all at once. I love him.... God I love him, and I really would do anything for him... But if I tell him he'd run far far away, I know he would... I just need to try to do my best to hide it... but I can never hide anything from him...
I had some work... I had some songs I needed dropped and sent out. I had a production meeting for someone else, and I snuck out this morning to do all of that. I thought about waking him up, but I didn't feel right doing it after the night he had. I was afraid to leave him just in case he had another nightmare, but if he's anything like me it's a one and done type of thing so hopefully he didn't have anymore. I walk through the doors of the smoothie shop, and Sandy isn't here, she's away for the holiday right now, but that doesn't mean I can't get smoothies for the two of us, hopefully brightening something up in him right now. My phone rings right as I approach the counter, and I see his name.
"Good morning." I smile.
"Would have been better if I woke up next to you... Where'd you go?" He asks softly, his voice laced with sleep. He never wakes up this late but considering the night he had he deserved it.
"I had some work things, but I'm on my way home now... Are you okay.." I ask, worried for the answer. He pauses for a second, and I prepare myself for the front to be back up but he sighs.
"No... I'm still upset..." He tells me truthfully which shocks me.
"Well stay there.. Take a shower, or do whatever you need. I'll be home soon alright?" I ask.
"I'll see you soon.." He hangs up the call, and I turn right back out of the smoothie shop, not caring about blended fruit for once, only caring about the man inside my apartment right now. I get on my bike, and ride home, going as quick as my feet will let me, but right as soon as I open the door I don't speak, hearing his voice. Who is he talking to?
"Well it's not that I don't like to open up... After I do it I feel great, it's just the thought of doing it that scares me." He speaks out, and I don't hear anything in response. Is he on the phone? "Don't look at me like that... You might not think she's scary but she can be sometimes okay?" He speaks again, and I freeze. He's not... There's no way... I hear a soft meow, and my jaw hits the floor.
"Okay... okay I know... You're biased though. You'd take her side even if she committed mass murder, and arsen." He speaks to the cat, and I close the door as softly as I can. "I just know that she's really really special Bowie... and I know you know that too." He tells him, and I smile the widest smile I've ever let out. He's really, really making it easy to fall hard.... I open the door softly, and close it harder, making it known that I'm home, and after a second he comes into the room, spinning me around as he holds my hips.
"Okay, what happened to being upset? I like this better, but what happened." I laugh as he spins me around, and Bowie walks in the room.
"You know Bowie really does help.. Now I understand why you talk to him." He tells me, and I glare at Bowie.
"Bowie.. You're my therapist, do you hear me!" I call out to him, and he ignores me as he goes to his food bowl. "You're stealing my cat therapist, and I'm not happy about it." I tell him, and he steals a kiss before stalking off towards the kitchen.
"Then I'll give you a hundred other things to be happy about... I'm stealing you for the day." He tells me as I walk into the kitchen, and I sigh with a small.. Life will always be an adventure with him by my side, I can feel it.
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Song: Trying My Best by Anson Seabra.
"and I know that you're scared because I'm so open."
I want to hear some theories..
Did you catch the Falling reference?
Did you catch the Adore you MV reference?
Harry also almost slipped up a lil bit..... he said.., "I...I..."
YOU WHAT HARRY?