I have my reasonings, but Klaine really isn't as toxic as so many people believe. They argue a lot, yes, but I wouldn't say that they're toxic and I have my reasons why. Please understand that I'm not trying to force my opinions onto you! I don't care if you hate Klaine or what— I just want to express why I don't see their relationship as toxic ahhhhhh
First of all, I would like to point out that fighting in a relationship is common. Your relationship won't survive if you don't argue or express yourself every once in a while and that's a fact. But, yes, Klaine did fight more than most relationships should for a television series.
In Season 5, they fought exactly 4 times in the span of over 1 year. Compared to most real relationships, that's not a lot, though!! That's approximately one fight every 3 months. It's hard to imagine since a majority of us watched the whole season in 2 days, but each episode is weeks apart, and they don't mention anything of arguments or fights between the episodes airring. It's safe to assume that each episode pulled out the fighting for drama, and in between they were a steady relationship.
Now that that's all discussed, here are my real explanations:
1)
The first argument they had off the top of my head is when Blaine sexually assaulted Kurt. Yes, that is inexcusable and I don't support it in the slightest howEver, Blaine did realize his mistake in the end. He understood that what he did was wrong and sincerely apologized— Kurt didn't have to accept the apology, but he did. He could've moved on for good, but he didn't. So, while we as watchers may not forgive Blaine, Kurt did make the obligation to understand where Blaine's mind came from and trusted him.
It should also be noted that Blaine didn't force Kurt to forgive him like many people assume; While it's a minor detail, Kurt was the one to approach Blaine in conversation. He was the one that came to start up a discussion over the issue, and obviously did not intend to leave broken up with.
2)
The second fight I can remember off the top of my head was when Kurt and Chandler were talking. I do think that Kurt and Chandler were just friends and nothing more. My friends and I send each other those type of cutesy messages all the time and people don't question it. Heck, I used to be in a relationship and he didn't care about those type of messages! Chandler and Kurt never showed any signs of cheating or hooking up, but rather lifting each other up and being supportive friends.
I do, however, see why Blaine was jealous. He left Kurt alone for a while only to find out he moved on so quickly, and that hurts. But you can't pretend that if your boyfriend stopped talking to you randomly that you wouldn't begin to talk to your friends more. Perhaps replace the way your significant-other made you feel by hanging out with them?
Just after I was cheated on, for example, my best friend and I would do date-like things together as an emotional replacement as I got myself together. We held hand at the movie theaters and said sweet things to each other. It's 100% normal and just a casual way of coping.
So, while Kurt and Blaine were in the rocks, there's no doubt that it was a misunderstanding. They forgave in the end and, yet again, chose to trust one another. I don't see anything remotely toxic in that.
3)
The third argument I can think of is when they break up. This one is quite a bit harder for me to defend, as there isn't much that can be defended. Blaine cheated, to keep it short and simple. Kurt didn't pick up his calls and didn't ask Blaine about how he was, and Blaine felt as though it was a sign they were breaking up. While I do think he should have waited like any normal human being to see if Kurt felt the same way about their relationship, I can see why he did what he did. I don't support cheating in the slightest— it emotionally broke me. I can say, however, that Blaine was your typical high school teenager and did what almost every boy in my school does (not that it makes it even less awful).
I'll use another personal example. I was cheated on this past year, and it sucked. I found out after a month that he was hanging out with another girl to satisfy his "physical needs". It hurt like hell. But, I also can't say that I don't understand why. The boy, Kyle, and I have been together for a few months and still didn't kiss or make out, and he was used to doing that with his former girlfriends. Kyle was used to a different type of relationship and wasn't ready to adjust for me. I'm not as physical as most of the girls he's dated— I'm more of a hand-holder, cuddly type. I don't kiss people a lot and I want to be a virgin until at least college. Kyle dated people that were the exact opposite, and he figured that was the only way a relationship should be. While I can't say I would ever go back to him, I can kinda see why this relates to Blaine.
Let's look back to season three, where Kurt tells Rachel about his and Blaine's monthly mingling. As they were each other's first boyfriends, don't you think that they would get used to the consistency of their relationship? It became a normal thing for them to be dirty at least once a month, and when Kurt left for New York, it was a sudden change. Yet again, that does not excuse Blaine's cheating, but you can see why he was determined to have a physical connection with someone: he wasn't used to not doing it.
So while Blaine cheating was definitely a more toxic situation between the two, once you look more in depth into the situation you can tell that it wasn't necessarily him wanting to hurt Kurt. It was Blaine trying to cope and adjust with the change.
4)
The next fight would to discuss would have to be from everyone's least favorite episode; Puppet Master. This was barely even a fight as much as Kurt admitting that Blaine could be seen as controlling and Blaine taking it to heart. Kurt didn't directly tell Blaine that he was a control-freak— he just reminded Blaine to make sure he wasn't.
So, really, that's just Blaine being oblivious. They weren't mad at each other the whole episode, so it should barely be considered a fight, but I thought I'd get some lash back for not defending this.
But I do admit that Blaine making a Kurt puppet was creepy and kind of strange, but it was a result of Blaine assuming that people saw him as controlling. The whole episode is just Blaine taking a leadership role and getting attacked for it, which made him second-guess himself. That's honestly all it was.
5)
The next fight is from 'New York, New York'. This is also a bit of a big one but I think I have a strong defense.
To start off, they've been happily moved in with each other for months. Only when they start school up does it begin to fall apart.
First of all, I still don't get why Blaine was raised 6 of his 8 classes. He was third in his class at McKinley, yes, but everybody in McKinley was incredibly stupid and 6 classes was just overdoing it. But, what's done is done, and it did lead up to the fighting.
So, I would like to explain why their argument really wasn't too toxic. And, of course, I will use another real life example to help deliver the information.
My good friend, Tessa, and I used to go on vacation to the beach every summer with our families. We usually only go for a week, but two summers ago we went for a month. Tessa and I always shared a room, and we were usually quite chill together. However, when we had to stan living together for 4+ weeks, we lost our mojo. We fought a bit and got argumentative. It's human nature— it seems like heaven at first, but it's hard to adjust spending every second of every day with somebody you're close to, especially at such a young age. I can't explain why it's like this, but it is.
So, naturally, Tessa and I resemble Blaine and Kurt. They love each other so much that it becomes a pain to bare with each other. I don't know why I can't explain why it works like that, but it does. Tessa and I had a much larger fight than Klaine did and we're still great friends to this day. It's a hard adjustment and Kurt and Blaine reacted the way anybody would've. They got too comfortable and suddenly had a lot more to adjust to once they saw each other in school too.
Ever since quarantine, my parents have been fighting d a i l y. It's because my dad can't go to work and my mom does everything she needs to in the morning, so they're constantly surrounded by one another. They always go to bed forgiven, but that doesn't mean they don't fight. My parents are not toxic when they fight, and neither is Klaine.
6)
I hate this episode but I guess I kinda have to discuss it anyhow.
Of course, I'm talking about their argument in 'Tested'. This episode was just relatable in the most uncanny way.
My first boyfriend, Tyler, would be Kurt in this situation and I would be Blaine. I went though a lot of insecurities last year, and it made me stress eat. I gained 20 pounds, which I'm still trying to lose, and got even more insecure. Tyler, meanwhile, ran 5 miles a day and was incredibly fit and slim. So, we would hang out, and I would get really embarrassed. My body compared to his was the equivalent of a blobfish and a twig. I didn't want to get intimate and was embarrassed to tell him anything. Naturally, once I did tell him how I felt, he called me selfish and broke up with me, but that's besides the point.
I mean, if my personal example doesn't relate to this, I don't know what does. Kurt had no idea how Blaine felt, and Blaine was too embarrassed to express his opinions. In this situation, however, Kurt was accepting and didn't break up with Blaine, which is how a situation like this should be handled.
And about Blaine's p0rn watching. . ? That's interesting, but I can't say that I haven't met a single young adult that doesn't watch p0rn.
See? Really not toxic. Just a humane situation that got a little too far.
7)
This situation is when Blaine lied to Kurt about the showcase with June. I was mad at Blaine at this for a while because Kurt obviously didn't seem as though he was absurdly jealous. He was a little resentful, yes— he admitted to it — but he was mostly just proud of Blaine. So when Blaine flat-out lied to Kurt, it was from a fear of hurting his feelings (but I don't know why he would fear that as Kurt just seemed accepting).
Besides that, however, lying is unacceptable, but I do get that it was his instinct to not want Kurt to be upset. I understand that— heck, I've done it before. I wasn't proud of myself and I had to admit my wrongdoing, but it ended okay and we're still good friends to this day.
So yeah, I wouldn't say that was toxic. It was an incident and, as Kurt said, he chose to trust Blaine again with full knowledge that events like this happens and it's okay.
8)
I don't want to write about this but if I want to explain myself, I guess I have to: their disengagement/breakup in season 6. The flashback hurts like hell to watch, and you should be thanking me because I rewatched it just for the making of this vent. Your welcome???
So basically, Blaine was late to a date with Kurt and Kurt got upset because it's happened several times before. Blaine explains to Kurt that he found a place to get married, and Kurt was questioning why it was so close to the start of school. Blaine explained that they were engaged for far over a year and just wanted to get married already. Kurt then said that he wasn't sure he wanted to get married anymore, and that was it. Kurt said that he regretted accepting the proposal, claiming that he felt forced to say yes, 100% ignoring the Klaine Box Scene where Kurt said he'd accept a marriage proposal.
So yeah. . . Not sure I can redeem that. That scene was pretty horrible. BuT—
They moved back in together over the summer, and same as in 'New York, New York', it didn't seem to work out. I think the reason is because they were engaged for too long.
Hear me out—
They've been engaged for, what is safe to assume, around 15 months. That's a long time. My parents were engaged for 3 months before their wedding. And, I can quote my parents on this; they had trouble living together until their marriage, simply because it didn't feel right at first. My mom said that it was almost uncomfortable, but once they got married she felt more secure in her relationship.
This is what Klaine needed! They were holding off on getting married for too longgg. Notice how they were 100% okay after 'A Wedding'?
I rest my case.
• • •
So yeah. I still think that Klaine was quite argumentative, but I don't think they were all that toxic. If you don't agree, then that's cool and I understand! Klaine's relationship was definitely used for drama purposes, but I do think that they have a real loving relationship behind all of that crazy.
Enjoy my 2407 word argument. I was. . . passionate. Very passionate.
Opinions?