a/n: i know nothing about law or how court systems work so sorry if any of this is incorrect or something. it’s fiction after all.
jasper’s p.o.v.
nonstop questioning. nonstop looks. nonstop thoughts.
“what did this man look like?” the investigator asked, adjusting the sleeves on his suit. i stared straight ahead and i bit my lip.
“long, black hair,” i mutter quietly. “he’s not that tall, maybe 5’9.”
“go on,” he encouraged, writing down on a notepad that made me just want to run away.
“he, uh… brown eyes, a scar under his eye… um…”
“face shape?” he asked. i looked at him and looked away due to his heavy stare of concentration.
“oval,” i say, closing my eyes.
“how did you know of gregory baldwin, mr. evans?”
i breathe slowly in and i open my eyes as the sound of a tape recorder clicked on.
“through my cousin—“
“was your cousin’s name jared?”
i nodded and cracked my knuckles, trying to release some of the tension. “yeah. his name was jared.”
“it says here that he was killed just about three and a half years ago. did mr. baldwin have anything to do with this?”
i shook my head. “no.”
he flips through some pages and examines something closely. “was it you, mr. evans? were you associated with the death of jared?”
i gulped and my heart started to beat faster and faster and louder and louder. i could hear it in my ears. “yes,” i whispered. the investigator hurriedly wrote something down and the scribbles were all too much and i felt like punching something, anything.
“care to explain?” he asks, putting down his pen and looking at me.
i shrugged and looked down at my lap, avoiding eye contact at all possible costs. i cleared my throat and sighed as distant nightmares were coming back. they were haunting me and just in a matter of seconds, the ghosts of the memories in my mind will be released and my palms start to sweat. “it was late at night,” i start. “it was snowing and probably way too much, but we didn’t know how bad it was. jared… he, um… we went to a party and he let me come with him. i was fifteen, so i thought that was the coolest thing in the world, going to a party with tons of other people, i mean. so… i went.”
“was there alcohol involved in this party?”
i nodded. “i didn’t drink, though. jared did. it was around one in the morning and jared was completely wasted and he started to walk out. i grabbed his sleeve and told him he couldn’t drive in the condition he was. he put up a fight and i just remember grabbing the keys from him and helping him into the passenger side. so, i decided to drive us home.”
“did you have your permit or license at this time it occurred?”
“i had a permit,” i said quietly. i blew out a shaky breath before continuing. “it was dark and before i knew it, i was driving his stick-shift pickup truck. jared kept mumbling nonsense so i turned up the radio. i wasn’t really that nervous driving because i kind of knew how before… i practiced driving, i mean.”
he picked up his pen and started to write again. i looked away and out towards a window. the sky was grey and light blue. tree leaves were falling and tiny flakes of snow were falling to the ground. “i didn’t know what to do when it came to slippery ice in the road.”
more scribbling. more thoughts. more everything.
“i remember jared playfully slapping me and when i went to slap him away, the steering wheel swerved. he sobered up some by this point and he was talking to me quite normally. he kept yelling that i had to pull over so he could puke, but i couldn’t. i just couldn’t because it was the middle of nowhere and it was too dark to even see the road signs with the headlights on.”
“pull the fuck over!” he yelled, holding his stomach and squinting his eyes.
“i can’t, man!”
“fucking hurry, then! oh my god, i’m gonna be sick…” he groaned.
“we’re almost home, okay? calm down.”
“i am calm,” he seethes. “fucking…”
“there was this big patch of ice on the road i didn’t know was there. so, we skidded.”
“jasper!” he screamed and we locked eyes and that’s the last image i remember of him.
“jared—“ i went to say, but then…
crash.
“we flipped multiple times and when we stopped flipping, it was nothing but silence and i couldn’t move. i yelled his name and he-he… didn’t answer me.”
“it says here that his death was caused by not wearing a seatbelt?” he questions.
i nodded slowly and rubbed my face with my hands. “he was ejected and he flew out the window. he died instantly on impact, paramedics said.”
“did you have any injuries as well?”
i shook my head. “scrapes and bruises, but that’s all. i…” i trailed off. i remember how paramedics came a few hours later after some random couple saw a wrecked car off to the side of the road. i remember how devastated my aunt and uncle were. i remember how they moved and lost contact with us. they were mourning and suddenly, they were just merely strangers who shared a terrible memory with us.
“how was mr. baldwin involved?”
“jared was in his gang, i believe. they didn’t call themselves a gang. more like a group of killers, really. when gregory found out that one of his best men were killed, he didn’t like it… he-he came after me after he saw me with jared one of the previous days.”
“were you aware of jared’s whereabouts?”
i shook my head. “not at the time. until i saw him in the act just a few days before. we never spoke about it again. he told me it was for self defense and i just believed him. he was like an older brother to me, so i believed him…”
“go on,” he encouraged, flipping through more documents.
i ran a hand through my hair and pulled on a few strands, causing me to wince. “gregory threatened that if i didn’t join him, he would kill valerie and—“
“valerie marie?”
i nodded.
“the girl who is in the hospital due to a bullet wound in the abdomen?”
i nodded again. tears burned my eyes.
“how did he know of her?”
“through me,” i said quietly. “he must’ve saw me with her.”
“so, go back to when you said if you didn’t join him, please.”
“right,” i said. “he-he was very adamant about everything. so when i heard he knew of valerie, i couldn’t let that go. i had to go with him. she’s my life, sir. my whole life and i couldn’t let her slip through my fingers.”
“you were pronounced as missing for over a year, mr. evans. is mr. baldwin the cause of your disappearance?”
“yes.”
“it says here you took the lives of three while you were gone. is that true?”
silence flew the room and my heart dropped to my stomach. “yes.”
“care to explain why?”
“self defense—“
“just like jared’s response,” he deadpanned, clicking his pen. my eyes grew wide.
“no, sir. it really was self defense.”
“are you positive with that statement, mr. evans?”
“very positive.”
“do you know the whereabouts of mr. baldwin at this moment?”
i shook my head. “he ran off when he shot valerie.”
“you wouldn’t lie, would you?”
“never,” i replied instantly. it was all self defense. i hated doing it, but when they kept attacking me i couldn’t just keep quiet. their deaths will haunt me forever and i hate how everything changes so fast and suddenly i’m in the middle of the court room, explaining to a judge as well.
the sound of a mallet hitting surface sounded through the air. “case dismissed,” the judge said. “i pledge mr. evans to be innocent due to the act of violence and terror that mr. baldwin put upon. clear the court.”
my mom ran her hand over my back, calming my nerves. my dad came up and hugged me. “you did good,” he whispered. “you did good.”
but i couldn’t help but think that valerie was still in a hospital, and how jay was still there. how i was still here. how everything was still here and present and i wanted nothing but to clear the air and clear my mind.
maybe it’s time for change, since it’s happening all too fast.