warning⚠️ this chapter contains mentions of suicide & depression
a u g u s t
~~~~~~~
all he heard was silence and so he didn't hear the rooftop door slam open or wild running footsteps or someone screaming at him to stop.
he stepped off the edge.
but he didn't feel like he was falling the right way.
in fact, he felt his back come into contact with concrete.
but not the concrete down there, the concrete of the rooftop.
he opened his eyes and saw that he was laying on the rooftop floor as a pink-haired boy held his arm tightly. he had fear and worry in his glossy bambi eyes.
"ARE YOU CRAZY!" the boy screamed.
he stopped me.
why?
"not crazy, just over it." yoongi replied as he shook the boy's hand off of him and stood up, walking back to the edge.
"now if you'll excuse me, i have something i need to do." he added.
he felt the same small hand pull him back by the wrist.
his firm grib on his wrist stung as it slightly re-opened a few wounds but yoongi didn't say anything.
"don't do it."
"i'm guessing you found the note huh?"
"yeah..."
"well then i guess i should've added the fact that i didn't want anyone to come and play superman to try and save me." yoongi sneered.
jimin simply tried to pull him further from the edge but yoongi shook him off for a second time.
"leave." yoongi said, coldly.
he hadn't even looked at jimin once.
"no, i won't let you do this, yoongi."
"i'll do it even if you're watching, i just didn't think you'd want to look."
"you're not doing this! you're seventeen! you have a whole life-"
"i didn't come here for the cliche 'whole life ahead of you' speech, i came here to kill myself so could you just leave so i can do that in peace."
jimin again didn't reply but grabbed yoongi again, this time with more force, which threw yoongi off-guard.
"what are you-"
"stopping you from ending something that's barely started." jimin said, with sad eyes.
"and what's that?"
"your life."
they both stood in silence, at the centre of the rooftop as jimin had both his hands gripping yoongi's arm.
"maybe i wish it hadn't started. ever think about that?" yoongi said, still emotionless.
"i did. but i know but there must be someone who cares ab-"
"don't!" suddenly yoongi was angry, "don't try and tell me that people care about me because they don't okay! they don't! i have no friends, no family, no nothing! no one would be sad if i died so just- let me do that. please... just- i need-"
yoongi broke down into tears and fell to his knees.
"just... let me leave! i don't- i can't be here anymore!" he yelled through his sobs.
jimin kneeled down in front of him and grabbed his hands.
"you have to stay here, yoongi."
"w-why?! why should i when i have nothing to stay for?" he said, trying to release his hands from jimin's.
"because even though things are bad now, someday i know you'll do good things. if you have no one to comfort you then that means you know how it feels to be alone, so if one day you meet someone who's alone, you can comfort them so they don't get to the point of coming up to a roof to do what you came to do. think about it, this is only the begining, you still haven't seen so much. my grandma tells me that sometimes the saddest stories have the happiest endings. that's like you."
yoongi listened, tears still running down his face.
jimin continued,
"you must have something to live for. even if it's not a person."
a pause.
"i don't have anything to live for but i have a person to die for." yoongi sniffled.
jimin didn't know where was too far with yoongi, especially since he was so vulnerable right now, so he decided not to ask whether he was talking about his mother or not.
"well, no matter who that person is, i don't think they'd want you to end it so fast. and not like this."
yoongi looked down at his knees that were pressed against the floor.
"besides," jimin continued, "the people who are still here... like jackson with his group of idiots... they've been dicks to you. they're horrible people. are they really worth dying for?"
"no."
"and didn't you mention your dad in your letter? i guess he hasn't been very kind to you... is he really worth dying for?"
"no."
"exactly, the people who've driven you to this don't deserve to see that they've won."
"i know..."
yoongi looked up at jimin and was surprised to see that he also had tears in his eyes.
"why are you crying?" yoongi said, sniffling.
"because i don't want you to do this yoongi... no one deserves to do this."
jimin squeezed yoongi's hands and stood up slowly, motioning for the older boy to follow him.
"cmon, let's go." jimin spoke softly and kindly, a tone of voice that yoongi hadn't heard directed towards him for a long time.
it was strangely comforting.
he slowly stood up with shaky legs and allowed jimin to slowly lead him further away from the edge and closer to the rooftop door.
he looked back at the edge and into the sky.
more tears began to run.
"i don't care."
jimin furrowed his brow, "what d'you mean?"
"i don't care if they don't deserve it... i want to die. it's not about them anymore, it's about me. i want to leave and never come back."
he felt jimin grip him tighter, afraid that he'd run back to the edge of the roof.
"yoo-"
"but i'll come with you."
jimin was shocked, "what?"
"i don't want to be alive anymore. but i'll stay here and i'll go with you because she told me to."
"who?"
yoongi looked up into the sky and then looked back down into jimin's eyes.
jimin understood.
"then let's go." he said, with a warm smile.
he led yoongi all the way out of the school and once they got outside at groud level he hugged him tightly.
jimin didn't know why he did it since he didn't know yoongi and had no emotional connection towards him.
yoongi just looked like he needed a hug.
badly.
meanwhile, yoongi wasn't sure what to do.
he hadn't been hugged in literal years.
the last hug he recieved was from his dad before he became an abusive alcoholic.
he let his arms awkwardly hang there at his sides as the slightly shorter boy held him firmly.
it feels warm. he thought.
jimin was still trying to keep composure because he literally just saved someone from ending themselves and was still shaken up by how badly yoongi begged him to just let him die.
seeing someone cry on their knees asking for death was the most heartbreaking thing jimin had ever witnessed and he wished to never see something remotely similar to it ever again.
although it looked like yoongi needed the hug, jimin also kinda needed it which is another reason why he did it.
i can't believe i'm literally hugging min yoongi. the same guy i was afraid to even make eye-contact with just earlier today.
he pulled away and grabbed yoongi's hand with a smile.
"i'll walk you home."
"that's not necessary." yoongi replied, he'd somehow reverted back to his cold self even after all of that.
"well it's necessary to me so lead the way."
yoongi groaned, removed his hand from jimin's and began to walk in the direction of his home.
jimin followed behind him like a lost puppy.
he saw yoongi light a cigarette and inhale it's fumes as if it was mere oxygen.
"you should stop that, yoongi."
yoongi didn't spare jimin a glance.
"i think it's natural for me to be a little stressed out after i just tried to kill myself so cut me some slack, will ya?" he said, rolling his eyes.
jimin frowned, "you talk about it like it's nothing."
"because it is nothing to me. my life means nothing but i guess i'm still hangin' in there." he said, inhaling more smoke.
"don't say that your life means nothing, i'm sure someone-"
"cares about me? we've already had this conversation, pinkie. no one cares about me."
"i mean, for what it's worth... i care about you."
yoongi stopped in his tracks, causing jimin to bump into his back.
"no you don't, pinkie." yoongi said as he turned to look at jimin coldly.
"i do. would i save you if i didn't?" jimin protested.
"the reason you stopped me is because you seem to be a decent human being, unlike most people in the school, not because you cared about me."
with that yoongi crushed his cigarette under his shoe and started walking again.
he heard jimin's footsteps behind him so he stopped and looked at him.
"leave now, pinkie."
"why?"
"i'm home now but... you can't come near."
"why?"
"you ask too many damn questions, pinkie. just go, yeah?"
jimin huffed and had a worried expression but, at the end of the day, jimin and yoongi were strangers and so jimin had no business following him when he said not to.
"alright. and stop calling me pinkie, my name is-"
"i don't care, pinkie. thanks for uh- i dunno, talking me down? i guess. bye."
and with that yoongi walked up his driveway and into his house.
my name is jimin, you super sad jerk.
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•1620 words
•not edited or proof-read
•double update!
•i wrote this quicker than expected which is good :)
•i hope you liked these past two chapters and are liking the story so far :D
•not many people read this book but i'm thankful for the people who do (°''3''°)
•stay safe <3
•luv youuu ♡
peace out xoxo,
nixy.