****this story contains, suicidal thoughts and actions also photos of scars.****
camilas dream
"hey babe" Alec said. we were both in his car coming home from our 6-month anniversary date.
None if the girls knew about him, I've kept it a secret from everyone because I thought they would view me as weak if I showed emotion. The only person who knew was my boss Garry since he was a father figure to me ever since my real one left, and also Ryan knew about it.
"yeah" I said. he had parked the car a block away from our house so the girls wouldn't catch us, he totally understood where I was coming from. We've have known each other since we were little and he knew about my background with my family.
"I had so much fun tonight" he said.
"so, did I" I said giving him a kiss. A car slowly parked next to us as the window rolled down. I saw Alec reach down for his gun, and I done the same. He looked at me with fear in his eyes. The next thing a gun shot went off and the car sped off. I looked down at Alec who had his hand on his chest as the colour red soaked his white shirt. "no Alec" I sobbed holding onto his face. "Cammy baby is going to be okay." he said slowly as I could feel in pulse slowing down. "no, I need you here with me. You're the only one who knows me." I said.
"just do one thing, watch you back, Lucas will come after you." He said. he looked me right into the eyes as I could see the life slowly leaving him. "I love you do much" I said as tears came down my face. "i love you too, and I'll always be here" he said taking his hand off of his wound then pointed at my heart, I held onto his hand. His boy went limp as his body laid back in the car seat. I started screaming and punching the dashboard in the car.
I woke up panting, was the sweat rolled off me because of the nightmare I just had. Well not a nightmare, a memory that haunted me. Lucas had came after us because he thought we stole from him and he killed Alec for it and is now looking for me because i was a witness to him murdering Alec.
There was movement next to me as I looked down to see Kells waking up. "morning" he said.
"morning" I replied as I tried looking for my phone. I opened it up looking at the time reading 1pm. "shit" I said as I was going to be late for my work at the garage. "what's up?" kells said with panic in his voice. I heard the rest of everyone wake up.
"I'll gonna be late for my work" I said, I stood up grabbing my shoes. "Yo Maddie make me breakfast as I get ready or I'm gonna be late then Garry will hold me back then I'll be late for my shift with Liam." I said.
"your normal? Bacon roll and a J" Maddie said looking at me as I ran up the stairs "yes please" I shout.
I hoped in the shower then done my normal routine straightening me hair and grabbing my bags putting my white stripper outfit in it along with my shoes.
i put on a stripped tshirt, with green trousers and shoes, my work button up. I got to the kitchen where everyone was sitting eating, I grabbed my roll and quickly eat it. "what time you coming home cam?" Lucy asked.
"around 1am, I think" I replied as I used a shoe lace to tie around my waist holding up my trousers.
"boys you can stay here if you want, I don't mind." I said lighting the joint up. "well I've got an interview at 4pm then I think the boys want to go to a club, but we could meet up after wards" Kells replied.
"yeah sure get one of the girls phone numbers and text us where to meet you later" I said. I grabbed my bag and got into my car driving off to the car garage.
MGK's (pov)
As Camila was getting ready for her work the rest of us all went up to the kitchen to make some breakfast. Even though we had just met these girls last night they were so friendly towards us, I mean letting us sat at their house, making us breakfast and the endless amounts of weed the have gave us. I hope that we can stay friends, we are only in California for the next couple of days then we end to go back to my hometown Cleveland. We were all messing around as Dub had Rook over his shoulder running around the room for no reason. "What time you coming home at?" Lucy says as I turn around to see Cam . "around 1am, I think" cam replied tying the shoe laces. She took a bite of the roll. "boys you can stay here if you want, I don't mind" she said, sparking up the joint.
I had totally forgot that Ashley my manager had set up an interview today and plus the boys wanted to go to the clubs in LA. "well I've got a interview at 4pm, then I think the boys want to go to a club, but we could meet up afterwards" I said.
Once she had left, we stayed for around another two hours before we left to go get ready for the interview, I had gotten the girls phone numbers and we all made a group chat with everyone in it. I had dressed in black ripped jeans with my white Cleveland browns football jersey with a white wife beater underneath.
The interview was pretty boring just asking me some questions about my past and what its like on tour. "so, what are you going to do with the few days off in LA?" she asked.
"well, at my show last night me and my crew bumped into these group of girls who took us on a crazy adventure last night, so think we might chill with them and see what they want to do" I replied.
"girls? So, does this mean anything for the future of you love interests? And what's happening between you and Halsey?" she asked trying to pry open my brain. I never like interviews because I always answered all these questions in the lyrics of my music, but they don't really care they would rather have me tell them than them listen to my music. "to answer that question, I am still single. Halsey and I are complicated, we are constantly on and off, and honestly I don't want to go back there. The new girls I met last night were crazy and I had a fun time with the four of them and so did the crew. But I just want to have friends the now. I'm not in the mood for any relationships " I replied.
"next question, whats left of the tour and what are you going to do with the time off?" she asked.
"well, we are going back to Cleveland for a two days, then back to New York for two shows. then back to Cleveland for the final show. but after that I have no plans, Ill be having some personal time with my daughter since I haven't seen her in months" I said.
"aw some father daughter time" she said, I nodded my head. "thank you for answering all of my questions Machine Gun Kelly." She said.
"my pleasure" I say getting up from my seat giving her a handshake before leaving with the crew. We went back to the hotel; we all got room service and ordered a couple bottles and food. Ashely had already booked us a table at a club.
Camila's (pov)
I parked my car out front of the shop and headed inside to find my boss, Garry. "hey" I said putting my bag inside my locker. "hey Cammy" Garry said.
"what jobs do I have today?" I asked.
"one paint job, a new set of tires" he said.
"anything for the racers?" I ask.
"need you to fit new bucket seats and a new exhaust" he replied.
"easy" I said trying my hair up and started getting my jobs done.
It was the end of my shift and I grabbed all of my things from my locker. I sparked up a cigarette as I looked at my phone with lots of notifications. Lucy had made a group chat with all the boys and girls so we can figure out what we were doing tonight. We were to meet at 1am just outside of a club down from the strip club. I felt a hand on my shoulder, and I saw Garry stand next to me. "hey cam, I know this time of year is really hard for you" He said, I looked down at me feet knowing he was talking about Alec's death anniversary coming up for 2 years, then also my father leaving me 5 years ago. "look Garry, I dont want to talk about it, I never have and never will. Yes, I miss them both a lot but ive got new people in my life. I have the girls, I have you which you basically my father. then ive got new friends I met last night. Im good, Im fine" I said, looking up at him. He let out a sight. "I know but you said this last year and I almost lost you. I never want to see you like that again, you almost died" He said with his eyes watery.
Last year was really hard for me, I couldn't cope with all the little voices inside my head. I started to go insane, one day I rented out a motel room not far from my house. I was there for days sitting alone not doing anything. I hadn't spoken to anyone, not even the girls. I was at my breaking point as I laid there in the bath full of my own blood and tears. As I looked down at my wrists seeing open wounds on my arms, the colour started to drain from my skin. My eyes became heavier until I passed out. Garry had went on the hunt for me, some how he found out where i was at the motel. He knocked down the door to see me lifeless in the bathtub.
"look, I cant promise you anything, but I feel a little bit better than I did last year. I've tried so hard the past couple months not doing anything to hurt myself" I said.
"Please just text or call me, I'm always here for you"He said.
" I will" I said giving him a hug then getting into my car heading to the strip club. I gripped both of my hands on to the steering wheel thinking about everything Garry said to me. I looked down at my arms seeing the scars pocking from underneath my tattoos.
All of my tattoos were placed carefully so no one could see the marks I had left all over my body from a far. My arms thighs and stomach covered in ink so no one could ask questions.
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