I was lost of words even more when I saw Edward stare at me with disgust. Feeling lost and hopeless, reflection was done to see what I have done and thought of it as all pointless.
"Thank god it's summer... Right, I have to look away from my mom again because of all the cult worshiping I have to do... "
It's a trap after all... They get your money, worship their leader, services need to be attended even if you don't have money to offer during these rituals.
On a random day of May, while taking a bath, I saw my naked body covered with bruises, scars, and bumps I got from my mother as she tried to convince me to not go to the cult anymore. I sat down and started thinking of ways to leave the house. Having no luck I stayed in my room, worked in a daily routine of serving and talking to my best friend.
I have hated this way of living but slowly I found myself falling for him.
I'm not beautiful, nor smart, nor someone you can even give a compliment to, I'm the worst out of all the students in this school. It sickens me at the fact of thinking about not being able to live without him.
I started having flashbacks to how Carlton and I were at each others throats... It hurts to lose one of the friends you've shared your secrets to. I can't even comprehend why it happened, but I know for a fact that it's my fault. It always is, and it's something that was engraved to my mind. To always blame myself...
..."Because everything is my fault".