I'm editing this chapter and adding in this joke because I thought it was really funny lol.
*Someone threw a bottle of coke at me today... but it didn't hurt because it was a soft drink.*
Chapter Fifty Eight
"Hey, sleepy head." a soft voice whispers.
I open my eyes and see Mason's chestnut brown ones staring back at me.
He takes in my obvious tiredness. I can feel my eyes burning from the sudden wake up. My shoulders are cold but the rest of me is covered with a blanket. Did I do that?
I don't remember grabbing a blanket before I fell asleep.
"Where is everyone?" I question, noticing the empty house.
"They left. It's just me and you."
Mason walks over to the coffee table, begins cleaning up the Scrabble game.
I wonder how long I've been asleep. From the view out my backdoor it looks like it's getting late. Early evening maybe.
"Why'd you stay?"
He shrugs, "If you want me to leave..."
I don't want him to leave.
"No, that's not what I'm saying. But if the others left why did you stay?"
He doesn't look at me, just continues piling game pieces into the cardboard box.
"I guess I had nowhere else to be. Plus, who else would help you clean up this mess?" a goofy smile appears on his face.
I take a look around the room and he's right, it's messy. There are dirty plates on the counters with cups and pillows spread all over the floor from where they played the game.
I stand up, "Damn, they're slobs."
He chuckles and nods.
It doesn't bother me that none of them cleaned up after themselves because we have an agreement that the owner of the house cleans up after. That way it won't be a bunch of people twisting around each other to clean up a few dishes when one person could do it easy.
We made this agreement a few months ago when we went to Ethan's house to hang out. We got pizza and when it was time to go everyone went to the sink but Cameron and I bumped into each other, dropping the plates. Glass went all over the floor.
That could've been avoided if only one or two people were trying to go to the sink so since there's so many of us we made that new agreement.
I climb from the couch into the floor to help him with the game.
"Why'd you go to sleep in the middle of the day?"
I continue dropping letters into the black bag.
"I don't know, clear my mind I guess."
The last thing I want to do is recall what Cameron told me. I don't know if I should believe what he said or not. Not that I think he'd intentionally lie to me but he may just have his facts wrong. That doesn't seem like something Trace would do. But do I know him that well yet?
Am I certain as to what he's capable of?
Mason nods in understanding. I'm thankful when he lets it go, not trying to urge for more details.
"Is that a new shirt?"
He's wearing an orange shirt. On the front it has a gray kitten wearing sunglasses while drinking a margarita. It's a chilled cat kicked back in a lawn chair with the ocean behind him.
I've never noticed that shirt before.
He nods once, laughing lightly, "I saw this in the store last week and knew I had to buy it."
"Why?" the disgust in my voice makes him laugh harder.
Not that it's an ugly shirt but...
Okay. It's an ugly shirt.
"It makes me look sexy. Does it not? I mean look at the way the bright orange makes my eyes pop. How the badass cat makes my skin glow. This shirt is a babe magnet." he humors.
It looks like a shirt Ethan would wear.
"I don't think it's working too well."
He gives me a pointed look, "You noticed it. It must be doing something right."
He's got a point. If the purpose of the shirt is to make girls talk to him then he's got the right shirt. Every girl around will be wondering why a guy like him is wearing that mostrosity.
Mason doesn't need excuses to talk to girls though. I've been with him before and random girls will walk up and place their phone numbers in his hand.
For some reason I feel like he just told me that to cheer me up. It worked.
I'm smiling now and I don't think I've had a genuine one since Cameron broke the news to me. Granted, I've been asleep most of that time but sadness still sucks.
"Give me the game you moron," I joke, rolling my eyes.
He hands it to me with a pleased smile.
We stand up and he begins picking pillows up out of the floor while I head upstairs to put the game back in the hall closet.
Step.
Step.
Step.
I sing in my head as I walk upstairs.
Step.
Step.
Ste-
Uh oh.
My foot slips, causing my leg to slide out from under me.
I slide down on my butt, feeling the edge of each stair hit the lower part of my back but it doesn't hurt.
This just feels like a very big inconvenience to cleaning up the game.
Thud.
I hit the hardwood floor setting off the stairs. The first thing I feel is a new bruise forming on my butt but for some reason I don't care.
"Emma?" Mason's concerned voice gets to me and I start laughing.
I start laughing because I just fell down the stairs. Of all things, I fell down the freaking stairs.
Making friends, no problem. Cooking, no problem. Walking up stairs, problem.
He turns the corner and crouches down instantly to look at me, "Are you okay?"
I'm laughing so hard that it's turned silent and I'm just wide mouthed, quiet. I'm sure I look like a fruitcake but I don't care. I fell down the damn stairs. My butt hurts.
"My butt hurts," I say quickly before the laughter takes over my voice.
He chuckles, "And that's a good thing?" he just stays beside me, smiling. It seems like my laughing is about to make him laugh. Laughter is contagious like that but he seems to be smiling for a different reason.
"Not at all," I laugh some more, "I think it's bruised." I laugh harder and lean into him for support before I fall over.
Mason shakes his head with a goofy smile, "I can't believe you fell down the stairs. Within the same minute your lungs are about to collapse from lack of oxygen."
I take in his words, realizing he's right and I need to breathe. I take a deep breath and start laughing again.
He grabs the bottom of my elbows to help me up, I hold his shoulders.
My stomach is hurting but the laughter won't stop.
Did I do crack this morning? I have crack head energy but this is too far, right?
Finally, I take a deep breath and the laughter dies down.
"Can you breathe again?" he questions slowly, leaning down to look at my face with a smirk.
I nod my head once.
He grins, "Good," takes the game from my hands, "why don't I take this."
Mason rushes upstairs, putting the game in the closet.
I'm glad he stayed to help me clean up. It's always great to have a friend around, even if you are just falling down your stairs and laughing about it.
He's goofy enough to make everything we do an event. He has a smile that can turn the heads of an entire room. He's just a fun person.
"Do you know who David Bowie is?"
His question takes me by surprise. The randomness of it is a little odd but of course I know who David Bowie is!
"Duh!" I say louder than necessary.
"I just saw you have a copy of the movie The Labyrinth so it made me think about it. What do you say we listen to the soundtrack of that movie while we clean?" he offers. He sounds more excited about it than I feel.
That's my favorite movie so of course I want to listen to songs from it.
But it also makes me think of the time Trace and I watched it together. He came over here, bored and needed something to do. So I put on that movie, he thought it was dumb at first but ended up loving it.
He was so cute to watch. The way he would draw his eyebrows together every time a new creature came on. The movie confused him. He asked so many questions throughout the entire thing but I answered every single one of them. I was glad that he was so curious to one of my favorite things.
But now isn't the time to be thinking about him. If I think I'll just get upset. Right now I'm with Mason trying to get the house cleaned up.
"Yes!" I shout but he's already got his phone bluetoothed to the speakers.
The song comes on and it keeps my good mood going. Falling down the stairs got my blood pumping. I feel like with the right motivation and tools I could go out and build a house.
No one can blame you for walking away
But too much rejection, uh-huh
No love injection, nothing
I sing loudly, so loud that I'm almost louder than David Bowie singing his own song. Mason laughs at me but keeps the lyrics going:
Life can't be easy
It's not always swell
Don't tell me truth hurts, little girl
'Cause it hurts like hell
We both lean down to make our voices deeper for the next line. He sounds like an angry mugger, causing me to laugh.
He finishes the lyrics out and I sing the chorus with him adding in the occasional background vocals. He makes his voice really high pitched, getting into the song to scream the "Ahh-ow!" I laugh some more which causes him to smile.
His observational skills are improving. He's figuring out quickly what makes me laugh so he can keep doing it.
My favorite part of the song comes up. I grin widely and take off running towards him, sliding across the floor on my socks to try not to crash into him, "Daddy daddy get me out of here!"
He catches me easily but my foot kicks his leg, tripping him. We both slide across the floor about two feet before tapping the cabinets beside us.
I lay on the floor beside him, just staring up at the bottom of my counter.
What the hell did I take today?
Crack? No.
Did someone sneak meth into my drink?
I start laughing again, feeling high from my good mood.
During the three minute song we managed to get all the dishes in the sink but none of them in the dishwasher where they belong.
"Have you considered taking vocal lessons?" he teases with a wide grin.
"Ouch. Says the guy who scared the dog with his singing."
He looks at me in disbelief.
I like this. Whatever game it is that we're playing, it's fun.
"She didn't get scared." so much confidence is behind his words that I feel bad for saying my next thought... actually I don't feel bad at all.
"She ran behind the couch."
He stares at me for a moment, keeping angry character. His eye twitches, his nostrils flair. I laugh.
Finally, he breaks and starts laughing with me.
When we calm down, I stand up, holding out a hand for him to take. He does.
"You can leave if you want to, I've got it under control from here." I suggest knowing keeping him here to help me with the dishes is selfish if he'd rather be somewhere else. But secretly I hope he can stay.
He must be able to see the hope in my eyes.
A humorous glint appears in his eyes before he speaks, "I don't know, what if you have to walk up a flight of stairs."
I roll my eyes, shoving at his arm.
He doesn't even flinch, standing still as a brick wall. His eyes meet mine and slowly, his smile begins to fade. But he doesn't look angry or upset. He looks serious.
"I'm not going anywhere, not unless you want me to." he takes a step closer, filling almost all space between us.
I can still smell the tropical fruit punch gum he was chewing just minutes ago.
He reaches up and grabs the side of my face, holding it gently. I freeze.
His eyes flicker down to my lips, he glides his tongue along his to wet them.
"What are you doing?" my voice is shaky, quiet.
Mason brings his eyes up to meet mine. The desire behind them scares me, "Can I kiss you?"
Four words. Four simple, questioning words that can mean or change so much.
My breath hitches.
Can he kiss me? He wants to know if he can kiss me. If his lips can be on mine, right now.
There's no hesitation behind my thoughts. Even before he asked I knew the answer, as soon as I saw him preparing himself, I knew the answer.
Mason is amazing. He's a great guy: funny, kind and handsome as hell but he isn't Trace. Trace is what I want. Who I want.
Trace is the only one. He's the only one who can kiss me, give me butterflies. He's the only one I want.
"No," I shake my head, bring my hands up to pull his down from my face, "I'm sorry Mason."
He seems taken aback, shocked by my answer. I don't know what he's thinking though. He's covering up his emotions from me.
"I'm sorry, Emma. I just thought that-" he licks his lips, biting on the corner in frustration. He roams his eyes back and forth, thinking. A few moments feel like a century of waiting for him to continue. Finally, he decides what to say next. "Damn. Why couldn't I kiss you?"
All that thinking that he did, that's what he came up with.
"Look, I apologize for the bluntness but you kind of just rejected me so my feelings aside... why did you reject me?" his eyes seem hurt and I know he's tired of trying to keep his emotions hidden.
It's like looking into the eyes of a little boy who just got his Halloween candy eaten. It's pitiful.
"I'm with Trace." the words come out quickly. It's as if my mouth decided to say them before my brain could think it through.
Mason takes a small step back, "Wait, you're dating my best friend and neither of you bothered to tell me?"
This looks bad on our part but we had a reason for why we did what we did. It seems that every time anyone finds out about Trace and I they're always hurt as to why they didn't know sooner. I can understand that they'd want to know but it isn't necessarily their business. We only kept it from them because we were already handling so much with our psycho that we couldn't put anymore pressure on anything.
"We didn't think you needed to know right then. Trace and I have been dealing with some stuff, we didn't need the pressure of a relationship to burden us with more."
"What have you been dealing with?"
I let out a deep breath, fighting the battle inside screaming at me to just tell him already! But the bigger, smarter part wins, "It's a long story but Mason I'm so sorry I didn't tell you sooner."
"How serious are the two of you?" his voice is hard, demanding. Like he won't take no for an answer.
"I don't know, Mason. Why does it matter?"
He shrugs, "If I knew it could've saved me the humiliation of getting stopped before I even got the chance to kiss you." his eyes meet mine again, "Have you slept together?"
He can't expect me to answer this.
"Mason, I'm sorry for lying to you about Trace and I but I don't see how anything beyond that is any of your concern."
He brings his bottom lip in, sucking lightly, "Fine. No, you're right. I'm just your best friend I mean who needs to tell me anything? Go out and sleep with Trace every night of the week until his cock breaks off inside you but at least I know you won't come crying to me about it. You never come to me for anything, not even to tell me you're dating my best friend. I could've been happy for you, heartbroken that I wasn't fast enough but happy that he was. Instead, I'm upset that you don't think our friendship is strong enough to confide in me about something like that."
He lets out a deep sigh.
It's not that I don't think we're strong enough but the simple fact that I don't want our friends to put more pressure on us. That's the last thing Trace needs to deal with.
But I know Mason would be happy for us, they all would be.
So then what's the issue?
The issue is that I don't want them to look at us and expect us to be doing coupley things like sitting next to one another, his arm draped around me as I lean into his chest. I don't want the pressures of their expectations.
So then really you're the issue? You're just too scared to do relationship things and make it official?
No doubt that my last relationship hurt me, but I'm over that.
Sure you're over it. But that doesn't mean you aren't still scared of it happening again.
But Cameron said Trace is talking to Cole. Cameron is his best friend, he'd know right?
"Mason I was stupid for not telling you sooner. I guess I was just scared of what might happen if I did. The moment people start referring to Trace and I as dating, the moment it becomes real."
He's confused, walks to sit on the couch. I follow him.
"You don't want to be with him?"
What?
"No, of course I want to be with him. He makes me feel incredible, I can be myself when he's around but I'm still scared of the final outcome. What if it's not forever?"
He stares off for a moment, thinking his next words through carefully, "The truth is we never know if it is or not. Not even marriage means forever anymore. The only thing that can define that is jumping into it and taking that leap no matter how scared you are. It may end in heartbreak but that's a chance you have to be willing to take. Trace is a good guy though, he'd never do anything to intentionally hurt you."
I know I don't have any proof of him ever hurting me. But I have someone telling me he has, I'd be dumb to ignore Camerons warning.
As much as I hate to admit it, Mason is right. The only way to find forever is to go through a few temporary, I've been through one already. Trace might be the last one I love but unless I try I'll never know. The ride to love can be scarier than your biggest fear but it's worth it.
Trace is important to me. But right now I'm having my doubts about him. I've got to have faith that he's doing right by me. He always has. He wouldn't go behind my back to talk with Cole. I have to believe that because if not then what?
I turn to look at Mason and he gives me a soft smile.
My arms instinctively wrap around his neck, pulling him in for a hug. He takes a moment to grasp what's happening before he quickly surrounds me in his embrace.
"Thank you, Mason. For being my friend." I whisper.
"I'm glad you found him. He's a good guy and if it can't be me I'm glad it's him. He'll treat you good, Emma. You don't need to worry."
Masons words sink into my head.
I hope he's right.
I can't get hurt again.
Authors Note:
Hello everyone! Thanks for reading! Have a great day and stay safe!
Those of you who didn't like Mason in the earlier chapters, how do you feel about him now?
And our little family in the comment section is growing faster guys! I woke up this morning with over 300 notifications and that's absolutely incredible that you all are so interactive! Thank you all so much! :):)