"You don't have to do this."
"Yes I do."
"This isn't the Games anymore."
"No. This is war."
Evangeline sighs, strapping my armor onto me and tying my hair back. My vest is overtop of a tight black long sleeve shirt with a few buttons from the right breast to the right shoulder. I also wear a pair of skinny leather pants that are surprisingly breathable and flexible, combat boots with special soles, and leather bracers. Finnick's necklace hangs from around my neck. My blowgun is ready to go and slung across my back. I have a few extra packs of poison darts tucked into my boot, as well as a dagger. Just in case. Evangeline adjusts my circlet on my head, then hands me a sleek helmet.
"Just press this button," she says, pointing to the button, "if you need a gas mask. It'll turn into a complete helmet and fit perfectly around your neck."
She sets it on my head, as well. She spends a few minutes adjusting it over the high-tech glasses Beetee made me. The lenses are slightly tinted and will adjust to fit the amount of lighting I have. I can see in the dark with them and they're linked to my brainwaves. If I think a certain command after voice activating them, they'll look up any information and show me anything, anywhere.
"I remember when you first went into the arena," Evangeline sighs. "Now here you are, going off to war."
I remember that girl. The girl in the sage green dress with the little black flats. The girl with the big stormy gray eyes and the long black hair. The girl everyone thought would die until she proved them dead-wrong.
"The Games changed me," I mutter. "They ruined me. They destroyed me."
"At least you're not a mental wreck," Katniss offers, walking into the room. I turn to look at her and give her a dirty look. "You what? Just turned seventeen, right?" I wait for her to continue, irritated by her attitude. "Yet you talk as if you're some hardened war veteran."
"Aren't we all?" I laugh coldly, shaking my head. "I grew up years in that arena, Everdeen. You don't survive what I did and stay a child."
"I guess you're right," she agrees, then smiles at me. How can she do that? Just smile. "I wish I had a love like you do."
"What do you mean?" I ask, confused.
"You and Finnick. You'd have to be blind to not see how in love you two are, maybe not even then. Your love is so natural and it comes to you so easily. How?"
We work because we fit each other perfectly in every way. He's like my missing puzzle piece.
"Every hurricane has an eye. A calm, safe, peaceful spot where it's paradise, yet everything around it falls apart," I settle on. She nods. "That's what Finnick is. He's the only part of my life I trust."
"How did he manage to do that?"
"He stayed, despite knowing how messed up I am."
There's a light knock on the door and in walks no other than Finnick Odair. His eyes light up when he sees me.
"You look beautiful," he tells me, smiling. He leans in and gives me a quick kiss. He turns to Katniss and smiles. "Hello Katniss."
"Finnick," she nods.
"Baby," he says seriously, turning to me, "you don't have to do this."
"Why does everyone keep saying that?" I sigh. "Yes I do. This is my district they're threatening, my people. I won't let him win. I never have."
Finnick and I are alone in the room. I stare past him, at my reflection. I look all of sixteen in appearance, except for my eyes. My eyes are dark, dull, and shattered, like most victors' eyes are. I look like I've lived a lifetime of pain and suffering, when it's only actually been a year and a half.
"Hey," Finnick says softly, gently making me look at him. "We'll be okay. So will everyone else."
"What if they destroyed their graves?" I whisper.
"Then we'll build new ones," Finnick promises, kissing my forehead.
"You have to wait in the hovercraft," I tell him firmly.
"Asph-"
"No. This is my fight. Promise me you'll stay in the hovercraft until it's safe."
•••••
"Soldier, the gunfire will be real," Coin reminds me as Evangeline adjusts my bulletproof armor.
"I know," I nod, determined.
"You could die."
"I'd rather die with my people, in my district, than with people I don't know, in a place I don't know." I give her a sharp glare. "I don't know how things work here, but in Five, we stick together."
"Which is exactly why we're here."
I turn to see at least eighty people coming into view. Men and women, sixteen and older.
"Jensen?" I gasp, recognizing Finch's brother instantly.
"Hey Del," he grins, opening his arms for a hug.
I haven't seen him since Finch died. I think he went to Three to study for a while, actually. I walk into his open arms, hugging him tightly. He was like a brother to me. Guess he still is.
When I pull away, Finnick looks less than amused. I give him a soft kiss on his jaw, and he smiles a little.
"Aw, I want to puke," Jensen says sweetly of the exchange, and I smack his arm lightly. "Anyway. We're all going into Five together."
"Who's in charge?" Finnick asks, watching him suspiciously.
"Asphodel."
"Wait, what? Me?" I ask, surprised.
"If anyone knows how to survive, it's you," a woman speaks up.
"You're the best fighter in the district," another says. "We need you."
"You're the only one Snow could never control," someone else points out. "You gave us hope that we can survive the Games, the Capitol. We follow you until the end of the line."
Everyone nods their agreement and I feel every eye on me.
"Okay," I finally say. "Here's the plan."