𝕆𝕟𝕖 𝕠𝕗 𝕥𝕙𝕖𝕤𝕖 ℕ𝕚𝕘𝕙𝕥𝕤 - 𝔼𝕒𝕘𝕝𝕖𝕤
"I've been searching for
the daughter of the devil himself
I've been searching for an angel in white
I've been waiting for a woman who's a little of both
I can feel her but she's nowhere in sight"
Hendrix POV
I glance over my shoulder as Nancy practically purrs at Jamison. I see the panic in his eyes as he darts his gaze around the busy diner. My new friend looks everywhere but my coworker's large bust. She flaunts what she has. He clearly isn't interested.
Shaking my head, I turn my grin to the bag of take out that Jamison ordered, then I march out to his table to come to his rescue.
The contrast of Nancy flirting with Jamison versus when she had her eyes on Cedric is completely different. Even though Jamison and I have been hanging out for a while, and I didn't even really know Cedric when it happened. It just goes to show how attached I really was. I remember how upset and defensive of him I had been.
It's like I knew he was mine.
When I show up at the table, Nancy is already gone. It's just slowing down in the diner. The supper rush is always hectic, but it's dying out as the time ticks past 7:30.
"Thank you, you're a lifesaver." Jamison jokes as he snags his paper bag of food. He hands me some cash, winking at me.
"Keep the change, cutie." I stare at the 50 dollar bill in my hand with an open mouth, feeling flustered.
He walks away swiftly before I can say anything, which would probably turn into an argument anyway. I can't pocket the money, my boss pools our tips.
I frown down at the green, crisp bill. It's so tempting to just take it. I'm too honest for that, even if I don't want to share tips with flirtatious Nancy.
A wonderful sound fills the diner, and I know it's my favorite song on the jukebox. One of these nights by Eagles. I glance to the music machine, only to see Jamison walking out of the double doors with a knowing smile on his face.
I smile too. He's too good.
After a few more tables, I'm nearly done in. I rush around the squeaky tile floors, running from table to table.
I have hardly any energy, and I hate to have caffeine when I'm pregnant, but it's almost necessary. This baby takes everything out of me. Sometimes it's hard to get out of bed. I have to constantly take breaks to try to catch my breath from just walking around. Things that used to be easy are now impossible. Not to mention the extra 20 pounds I've gained.
It's all absolutely exhausting.
Swinging in and out of the kitchen, I'm practically dead on my feet. My legs are spaghetti noodles underneath me. They wobble with exertion, and little half pint gives a kick. I rub my belly with a soft smile. I don't know the gender, and I don't want to know until they're born. I want it to be a surprise.
I want to have something to look forward to.
Zooming back out to the next table, I'm shocked when I see one of my old professors. She glances at me with a sickly sweet grin, it's almost malicious. I frown.
"Professor Henderson. I didn't expect to see you here." I say, my throat feeling tight. This is the lady that saw me and Cedric kiss. She knows. She didn't tell on us. Now she's here. Her lips are candy red that are turned up in the corners, and her blonde hair is pinned in a perfect ponytail.
She has to be at least 30, and she's beautiful.
"Oh, hi there Hendrix." Professor Henderson's eyes rake me up and down, stopping on my belly. "You sure do look different."
Her comment sends a pang through me, and I put a comforting hand on my stomach. There's a gleam of joy on her face. She puts the menu down.
"Yeah. I guess. Anything you want to order?" I ask around the lump in my throat. She hums in though, pressing a long nail to her chin.
"A water, and a caesar salad. Just trying to stay slim, you know?" I bite my lip, feeling self conscious all of the sudden. My body is a lot bigger than it used to be. Clearly she noticed the pregnancy weight.
I tell myself that the comment is innocent. She's not trying to hurt me, but she keeps going.
"Say, when's the last time you saw Cedric? Oh, I mean, Professor Riley? Clearly you two were rather... close." She settles on the word with a thick, sultry voice. There's clearly implications there. Then she raises an eyebrow at my stomach.
"Unless," She says, "you've been around the block."
Her words make me sick. Slut shaming isn't okay, and assuming someone's sex life isn't either. This lady is not nice. I was wrong to assume differently. I can't show her I'm mad though. I'm too non confrontational. All I want to do is run away.
"No. It's his." I whisper, and tears spring to my eyes when Professor Henderson grins.
"Well, men have their needs. It was foolish of you to think otherwise. He probably needed a more mature woman to satisfy him." She mentions, fluffing her hair. "He always did have this look in his eye when he saw me, as if he knew what he was lacking with you. A woman with experience is always better. You'd do well to remember that. Date someone your own size, sweetie. Leave the men for the women. Find yourself what you need, a boy."
I nod, looking at the ground before marching away. I hold my pen and pad tight to my chest as I push the door into the kitchen. Ronnie must see my distress, because he raises an eyebrow and pauses his patty flipping.
"You alright?" He asks, always concerned about me. I shrug innocently, trying to look normal.
"Yeah. I just need a little break. Is that alright?" I can barely get the words out, but Ronnie nods. I put in Professor Henderson's order before rushing to the employee bathroom.
As soon as the door is locked, I'm retching my lunch into the toilet. I haven't thrown up in a while, I'm past the morning sickness, but I don't stop until everything in my stomach is deposited into the toilet bowl.
Then the crying starts. I don't know what to do. Why am I so lost? I sob until my stomach hurts. Cedric, where are you?
✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰
Cedric POV
The knock at my door doesn't catch me off guard, because I heard Savannah coming down the hall. I don't look up from my paperwork when I tell her to come in with some reluctance. I'm a bit annoyed at the moment. And depressed. My mate's absence is taking its toll on me. I can't stand to be around anyone.
She opens the door, and she has someone else with her, someone who she holds by the back of the neck. I raise my eyebrow.
Miranda.
Curiosity gets the best of me, and my annoyance disappears. Hendrix's lycan friend has a sheepish look on her face. She doesn't want to be here. Savannah dragged her here. I wonder what the hell is going on, so I wave a hand for them to enter.
"This better be good enough for you to be disturbing me this late." It's 2 am. I'm not in the mood to interact. Then again, I never am. I've been a recluse these past few months. I sigh heavily, leaning back.
Savannah walks in with Miranda in front of her. She slams the door behind her to display her sour mood.
"Sit." She demands, shoving the smaller female into the leather couch across from my desk. Miranda folds her arms over her chest, tucking a piece of hair behind her ear in a nervous gesture. "Tell him."
"Tell me what?" I ask Savannah calmly, my temperature slowly climbing. I'm not feeling overly patient.
Miranda's eyes dart to up at my Beta before sliding to me. She's much different than the girl that tried her hardest to get me to stay away from my mate.
"Tell. Him. He is your Alpha now, whether you like it or not." Savannah says, and Miranda shakes her head. That only angers Savannah. She lifts a thick, white envelope, tossing it onto my desk.
I reach for it, unfolding it to see dozens of 100 dollar bills. My eyes widen, and then I look at who it's addressed to. I raise my head slowly.
"Why are you trying to send money to Hendrix?" I ask, my gut falling. I have a suspicion that I don't want to be confirmed. By the look in Miranda's eyes, I already know what she's about to say.
"Hendrix has money problems. Bad ones. She already moved into a cheaper apartment. She will never admit it, but she needs help. I'm trying to help provide for her. I know you want me to call her all the time to check in on her, but she's not answering very often, and she won't tell me a lot. I have a bad feeling, okay? Just let me do this for her. Please!" She begs, and I can tell it takes a lot of effort to show that much vulnerability. It's a hit to her pride. She's of Alpha blood after all.
Those words are devastating. I should have been more observant. I knew Hendrix had money problems, but what college student doesn't? I didn't know how bad it was.
I'm such a bastard. My human was using coupons. I thought it was just a cute little hobby of hers. I didn't think it was necessary.
She was struggling right before me, and I didn't even notice. And now I've left her to fend for herself.
I rub at my forehead, dropping the paper pocket full of cash. I should've been the one to provide for her. Not her shitty excuse for a friend.
Savannah is getting impatient.
"Well, what do you want me to do with her?" My Beta presses, looking down at Miranda to try to intimidate her. I've seen her do it a thousand times. She likes being over someone.
"Why should we do anything to her?" I ask, and Savannah scoffs, waving a hand over Miranda's head. The lycan flinches into her seat.
"You asked her to relay all information she had on Hendrix. She conveniently left out a very critical detail. This is a serious offense."
I sit there for a moment, grilling the arm rests of my chair and thinking. What she says is true. I'm too busy hating myself to really care. I should have been better.
"And she used her own money to provide for my mate. I see nothing wrong with that." I turn to address Miranda. She fidgets under my gaze. I can taste her fear. I want her out of my office. "You can send this money to her, but from now on, I will be the one to provide funds to my mate. Understand?"
Miranda nods.
"When you send it, don't say it's from you. Leave it anonymous. She won't accept it otherwise." She instructs, and I nod.She jumps off of the couch, grabbing the envelope before rushing for the door.
"Sure thing." I mumble after she leaves, and then I turn to Savannah.
She slumps onto the couch, spreading out her arms and blowing out a frustrated breath. She looks up at the ceiling when she talks.
"Man, I really wanted to punish her. I don't like that female, and it's getting pretty chummy around here." She mopes, running a hand through her black hair. She smiles at me. I ignore her, glancing down at my papers.
She sighs in obvious exasperation.
"What the hell is wrong with you?" She asks.
I glare at her, I don't know how to explain it, but I'll try. Klepto helped me realize how much it helps to say something rather than internalize it.
"Because Miranda is a bad friend to Hendrix, but at least she's doing all she can. She's doing better than I am at looking after my own mate. I'm no better than her leaving Hendrix at that party. I left her." I pinch the bridge of my nose, closing my eyes and breathing out through my nose. "I don't know what I'm doing. I can't get her back. She won't want me after all of this. I'm a horrible mate. Who knows what Hendrix will say to me when I go back."
Savannah's demeanor changes quickly. She goes from playful and talkative to quiet and reserved. She shifts uncontrollably, and then takes a deep breath.
"What if you don't go back." She offers.
My eyes fly open, I wasn't expecting that answer. The amount of anger is causes is outlandish. I stand, slamming a hand down on my desk.
"What?" I demand through my teeth, and she shrinks back. She gulps. I almost think she won't answer. She finally does.
"I've loved you for as long as I've known you, Cedric. I was 12 when I first saw you. It was just a crush then, but it's turned into more." Savannah confides, and my mouth parts. This is a shock. She keeps going. "I know you have a mate. I've dreaded the day you would find her. I thought I would hate her, I thought I would want to rip her throat out with my teeth."
She shakes her head, staring at her fingers. I've never seen my Beta so soft spoken. I should be pissed that she wanted to kill my mate, but I remain silent.
"But, I don't. Honestly. She's so sweet and innocent, and I feel like I have to protect her. She's a human. She's your mate.... and she's my Luna. I know that if it came down to it, I'd die to protect her, because I know that it would kill you if something happened to her. And I sort of... I kind of care about her." Savannah scoffs. "If you can even believe that."
I don't say anything. I don't know what to say. This isn't what I was expecting. How did I never see this?
We stay like this for a few silent seconds. I stand and she sits, staring up at me with sad eyes.
"I knew it was a long shot. You two belong together. I won't try to keep you apart. I just want you to know that I'll always love you. Even if I find my mate, and you end up happy with yours. You'll always hold a place in my heart, Cedric."
I've never thought that Savannah could be so vulnerable. I didn't think she had that side to her. She's so incredibly sad. The heartbroken look in her creamy eyes is blatant. The scent of her pain makes my stomach churn.
She's shattered. It's all my fault. I should've made sure this didn't happen. Her childlike fantasies got away from her. She broke her own heart. All because I didn't return her infatuation.
She stands and walks away. I stay where I am. She looks at me over her shoulder from the doorway, clutching the doorknob with pale knuckles.
"Can I ask you something?" She wonders. I nod absently, not trusting myself to say anything.
"Did you ever... have you ever seen me as anything but your little sister?" I ponder it for a moment. I can see and smell the amount of pain she's in, but I can't lie. I owe her the truth.
"No."
Savannah bites her bottom lip, as if she knew all along. She nods her head before she ducks out of my office. After a few minutes, I realize that I'm still standing here in shock. I slowly settle down into my chair. Closing my eyes, I think of Hendrix and all my stress seems to melt away.
I will see her soon, I just know it, and I can't wait.
I might go insane if I have to wait any longer.
✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰ ★ ✰
If you're reading this, you're a beautiful person:)
Yay! Surprise chapter!
I've decided to try my best to post more often, because it's been heavily requested. I know it's kind of a frustrating part in the book, so I'll push through it just for y'all!
Let me know what you think of the chapter!
Next chapter will be on Friday
(or maybe sooner😉)