Hi, I'm back! Thank you all for being so patient with me and being so supportive! I know I've been taking forever with all my updates and kinda going MIA, but I've been trying to figure everything regarding the story out so it can smoothly be concluded!
During this time I hope you all are safe and healthy, I wish the best for every single one of you! Please be careful during these times, and try your best to stay as safe as possible!
And also, thank you so much @ginnylovegod for the beautiful cover! I love it!
Also also, I made an Instagram if any of you want to follow it! I'll be posting various things such as ideas, writing processes, and just my random thoughts! So if you want to follow, my user is @cadewritesoccasionally
"So first of all, I just wanted to thank you for responding and agreeing to meet with me on such a short notice. So let's just get straight to business, hm?"
Silently, I nodded at Headmistress Beauregard. She was an intimidating figure, with her silver hair tied tightly into a chignon and her immaculate navy pantsuit. Was it just me or did her brooch look sharpened?
Instead of showing my fear towards the domineering woman, I just nodded with a smile. "Yes of course. Would it be alright if you go into a little more depth? I was just a little confused with some aspects of the email."
"Most definitely. So Miss Graham, when you transferred here were you aware that you had well over accumulated all the necessary credits?"
"Yes, I was taking extra core courses every summer to get up a few levels. I was a little behind in math during middle school so I wanted to catch up and then go back to being in the advanced course level. And for the other classes I mainly took the summer courses to get stronger." I fiddled with the ring on my middle finger.
"Okay that's good to hear. So when your counselor was reviewing your transcript, she noticed that you have well over all the credits needed for high school. And you surpassed Cambridge's requirements for juniors by a single credit course,"
"So I went to discussing with your counselor, and we came to a conclusion. I wanted to see actually, if you were taking the summer courses so you could graduate earlier?"
"No," I shook my head. "It was mainly just to skip a few levels. I have never really considered graduating early."
"I see. So when you transferred to Cambridge, all your credits from your previous school transferred. And so it seems that your summer credits weren't taken at your old school, but at Cambridge they were transferred because we do take the credits that come from any high level course if the student were to pass with a ninety percent or above. So going back to the credits, you have the necessary credits to graduate a year early. Would you like to?"
Graduating early? I didn't ever think I could graduate early. The college summer courses that I took were just to make my father happy, nothing more. But now, now my life could change. I could leave the school within a few months, take a gap year - no my father would never let me do that. I could start college a year early. I could start new- I would be leaving.
Nico. Luca. Dakota. Sarah. Clark.
All the people who have shown me what real friendship is, I would leave if I were to graduate early.
Clark.
Is it worth it? When I got the email when we were in London, I didn't tell him. I knew that this would be the topic of discussion at today's meeting- but something inside told me not to tell him.
Clark. Clark.
What should I do? Is a high school relationship worth it? He is someone who makes me feel complete, but isn't that with every relationship?
Clark. Clark. Clark.
How would he react? Would he feel betrayed? Angry? Sad? He's always been understanding, that's one of his best traits. He loves me for me. He would understand- right? It's my future.
"You can think about it, take a few days. But I would encourage you to let me know before Friday, because we would have to adjust some of your courses. Your elective courses haven't been fulfilled yet so we have to switch you into an arts class and a religious studies course. But that's only if you decide on graduating this year. But feel free to come in anytime this week and let me know."
"Of course. Thank you for helping me out, Headmistress." I nod with a forced smile, standing up. With a goodbye, I began to speed away, trying to corral my thoughts.
Shit.
"You know, you all are terrible friends,"'Dakota suddenly dropped his sandwich onto his plate.
Luca looked up from his math homework to meet Dakota's eyes. "How so?"
"I asked all of you to hang out yesterday and each and every single one of you said no. So I have one question. How dare you?"
I let out a silent laugh, while the other three boys held amused looks on their faces. Dakota just knitted his eyebrows in dismay.
"Why are you laughing? How about you tell me what you were doing- what was more important than me, Blakely?"
I let out sputtering noise, trying to hold in my laughter. "I was in a meeting, sorry Kota."
"No meeting is more important than me, I was so bored and I ended up doing all my homework! Do you not understand how bored I must've been to complete all my missing work?"
"I apologize, what about the other three? I've never known Clark for having a social life other than with you three." I nodded in Clark's direction, where he shot me an offended look.
"For your information, I also had a meeting. It was with coach regarding lacrosse season." Clark snootily replied.
"Ah yes, lacrosse captain. How nice. Luca and Nico, what's your excuse?"
"Studying." Luca grinned, before going back to solving his proofs.
Nico hesitated briefly before biting his lip. "I was... on a date." He sighed, blushing.
"You were on a what?" Dakota gaped.
"A date." Nico looked down at his plate, his face rosy.
"A date with who?" I leaned forward excitedly.
"With whom." Clark corrected me snarkily.
"Oh shut up!" I slapped his shoulder, to which he began to chuckle, immediately stopping when I shot him a glare.
Turning back to Nico I waved for him to continue. "So who was it Nico?"
"I mean technically it was just a study date and it doesn't mean anything so it's not importa-"
"Oh just tell us!" Kota groaned. "We'll find out at one point or the other. Remember Nico- secrets can never be hidden from us, we know everything."
That sent an involuntary shiver down my spine. I had yet to tell anyone about the details of meeting I had yesterday, and it was creating a growing sense of anxiety in me. But I decided to ignore the feeling.
"Everything?" I raised my brow at Kota, before spearing a leaf of lettuce with my fork. "Are you sure about that?"
"I mean that was a bit of an exaggeration, but I can figure out a lot of stuff. I have my resources," Kota shrugged.
"He's right," Clark nodded, throwing his arm around my shoulder casually. "From his 'sources' he figured out what I was planning on getting him for his sixteenth. Three months in advance. It's psychotic."
"It's useful!" Dakota protested. "Nico, who was it?"
"Was it Daisy?" Luca nodded in the direction of the table with my friends.
Nico briefly hesitated, before nodding. "It was just a causal date! Like she was just saying how she was struggling a bit in German, so I just asked her if she wanted to go and get coffee so I could help her study!"
Kota and I began to coo in response, while Clark and Luca clapped Nico on the back.
"Finally!" Clark cheered, "We've been waiting for you to make your move forever!"
"It wasn't forever!" Nico protested. "It was just a couple of months!"
"More like four." Clark argued back.
Nico huffed, his face still as pink as the frosting on Kota's sugar cookie. "Clark, we all can't be you, winning over the girl within a month!" He rolled his eyes sarcastically.
I dramatically gasped. "It was not a month!"
It wasn't, right? I came here in August, and in that month I was ready to attack Clark if he made a bad move with his words. In September, we were still at each other's throats, but it was slightly more civilized. Near the end of September, we just argued and that was when, in New York, the deal to be each other's dates surfaced. October was spent practicing and 'playfully' arguing, in the middle my realization that I liked him came to be. And then near the end of the month, we kissed and he soon asked me out.
Oh my god it was like, three months. It was that fast? That's insane, holy shit. Did I like Clark even before I came to Cambridge, just... unconsciously? Did he like me? Why di-
"More like three. It didn't take much work, Blake was just that into me." Clark pulled me closer, quickly kissing the side of my head.
"Oh shut up, you're not that great." I blushed.
"Of course I am," Clark cheekily grinned, "That's why you love me."
"Maybe." I mumbled, looking away from Clark to observe my finger that was twisting my newest ring.
For Christmas, Clark had gifted me the newest addition to my collection. No, it wasn't an engagement ring or a promise ring, he just had figured out that I loved my rings and on Christmas Day he hesitantly presented it to me. It was a simple encrusted band with dainty diamond leaves poking slightly out. It was my newest favorite.
Suddenly the sound of a chair screeching backwards interrupted my fidgeting. Luca had suddenly gathered his stuff and had his backpack hanging off his shoulder.
"I actually uh... gotta head out and get some work done. I'll catch up with you guys later." The boy quickly waved before rushing out.
"Huh." Nico remarked. "He's been studying an awful lot lately. Really hard at work. You think something's up?"
"He's probably stressed that it's the second semester, and is trying to catch up," Clark shrugged, glancing at the door Luca had escaped through.
"Probably," I sighed. "But lately he's been really quiet."
"He's always quiet! It's part of his mysterious charm." Kota wagged his eyebrows.
I bit my lip. "He's just.... more quiet. I dunno, he hasn't really talked to me since I got back. I miss talking to him, but you're right. He's probably getting all caught up with his studies."
Kota pat my shoulder reassuringly. "Don't worry, Blake. You can always talk to me, my door is always open. Especially late at night when Clark can't talk to you, you can just come right in an- Ow!"
Clark cut off Dakota's flirty comment by throwing an apple core aggressively at the model's perfectly blonde head. "Stop being such a wanker!"
"It was a joke! I swear! Stop throwing stuff at me! I literally just conditioned my hair!"
Clark just scoffed, and ceased his food assault. "Be careful, if you come after my girlfriend I won't hesitate to use a chair instead."
"Aggressive!" Kota looked horrified, while Nico and I just dissolved into laughter.
It was dark. I mean, obviously, it's night time. But that was my first thought that came to be as soon as I woke up. My room was pitch black save for the soft light emitting from my ringing phone, and my thoughts were very very groggy.
It took me a beat to decide on if I actually wanted to answer the phone. My heart was saying get more sleep, but my brain told me to answer.
"Hello?" I squinted as soon as I accepted the call, my vision bleary due to the sleep in my eyes and lack of contacts.
"Good you answered."
"Nico?" I yawned, "Why are you calling it's... one in the morning."
"I couldn't really sleep and I needed to ask you something."
"What's up?" I sat up, the grogginess slowly dissipating.
"I'm coming over to your dorm real quick, is that alright?"
"Yeah sure. Wait, but what about the curfew? Will you get caught?"
"I have my ways, fear not Blakely." Nico chuckled, "Oh wait, put on a jacket! I'll see you in a few."
I swung my legs over the edge of my bed and padded to my closet. Quickly, I managed to shove a large warm hoodie over my long sleeve pajama top and tie my hair back before a knock sounded on the door. I assessed myself in the mirror briefly, deeming my sweatpants acceptable attire for meeting with Nico. He's seen me in a hospital gown, it's fine.
Swinging the door open, I came face to face with a happy, albeit tired looking, Nico Caldwell.
"Nice night we're having innit?" He cheerily greeted me, giving me a brief side hug.
"It was really nice, until I had to wake up." I playfully narrowed my eyes at him. "So what brings you to the girls dormitories at..." I checked my watch, "One thirty-two in the morning?"
"I'll answer that in a second. First, follow me. You have a thicker jacket, right?" Nico stuck his hands in the pockets of his own jacket.
Quickly, I got another jacket and layered it over my hoodie before shutting the door and following Nico to wherever he was leading me.
As we quietly crept through the dark hallways, I carefully analyzed our surroundings for any security guards. Unlike myself, Nico seemed to be relaxed- his posture and easy going smile being the main indicators. It's like this late night wandering was... normal for him. Routine.
Soon we had approached an unlocked room on the top floor of the building, and Nico effortlessly pulled open a window and climbed out. He climbed out of a window.
"Nico!" I whispered into the darkness. "What are you doing?"
The brunette boy suddenly popped his head through the window. "Come on! It's safe I swear, just come out and then go to the right! It's completely flat on this landing," he nodded to my left.
Heaving a sigh, I followed his directions. I might've bumped my head slightly against the windowsill, but other than that my first time sneaking through a window was smooth.
Nico sat to the right on a flat landing of the roof. He scooted to the side, making room for me to sit. As I crawled to the area, I finally noticed our surroundings.
The first thing that I noticed was how cold it was. The air was chilly, even more so compared to the air on the courtyard level, where we were earlier. The second thing? The silence. It was completely quiet, save for our breathing. And the third thing? The stars.
In New York, there weren't really stars. Whenever I was to look into the sky, it was dark. Star gazing was more of watching the planes fly to and from LaGuardia and JFK, their lights blinking occasionally white and red.
But here, there sure were stars. Plenty and plenty of stars, filling the skies and twinkling brightly. They varied in sizes, unlike the constant shapes of the airplanes.
"Isn't it cool?" Nico was also looking at the sky, a small smile playing on his face. I could barely make the outlines of his face, but since we were pretty close I could see his smile.
"It's really pretty," I nodded in agreement, looking around. The dark silhouette of the tall conifers surrounded the academy, making the area feel even more secluded. If you focused hard enough, you could just barely make out the chirp of the crickets.
"Just like you." Nico said sarcastically, his voice dramatically deepening and his accent switching to imitate Clark's.
"No he would definitely say something like 'it's not as pretty as me'" I imitated my boyfriend, similarly to Nico's impersonation.
"What a wanker," Nico laughed, "He would say that. You really know him well. Actually, that's what I wanted to talk to you about."
I raised my eyebrows in surprise. "You wanted to talk about how well I know him?"
"No! I meant like him, and you. I was just going to say... I'm really really glad you're together. You're really good for him and I'm happy that you're making my best friend happy. But I wanted to make sure that he's making you... happy?"
Once again, my eyebrows raised in surprise. "Of course he is! He is truly, truly amazing. He really does care for me, and I really care for him. I love him." I couldn't help the silly grin from crossing my face.
Nico cooed at my response, "You know, I was the one who made him admit to his feelings about you. Before you two went to New York for the ball. So I deserve some kind of prize."
"What kind of prize?"
"Probably you naming your first born child after me, that's good enough."
I let out a soft laugh. "Maybe."
We were both silent for a few minutes, before Nico spoke again.
"You know you can tell me anything, right?"
"Of course," I paused. "Why?"
Nico shrugged. "It's just that- I think that- I mean," he sighed. "If you ever need help with making a choice, I'm always here."
Immediately, the thought about graduating early popped into my head. But I couldn't, I wanted the decision to be mine, not swayed by anyone except myself. That might sound irrational, but irrationality was my specialty. I didn't want to second guess myself.
Nico sighed. "And I want to let you know that you shouldn't be influenced by anyone if it's going to affect your future. I'm here to help, not change your mind. I'm never going to take sides."
"Remember the meeting I mentioned at lunch?" I twisted a stray thread on my hoodie sleeve. "It was with the headmistress. She was asking if I wanted to graduate early- to graduate this school year."
The boy next to me was silent, before softly speaking. "I know."
"You know?"
"Yeah... I was walking into the office when you were leaving. The headmistress just mentioned something about graduating early and meeting with you, offhandedly of course. But I kind of pieced it together, it became even more clear when you weren't really describing the meeting today. And you usually like to describe everything you do."
Nico Caldwell was severely intuitive. How he managed to figure it out without snooping is beyond me. But he still managed to be sweet and a good friend when trying to talk to me about it.
"You're observant." I chuckled. "But I am so confused. My first thought when she offered it was what would I do? Like how would I spend that extra year? And then leaving all of my friends, you. But then it was like everything went blank and all I could think about was Clark. How would he react? How would he feel? Is it worth it? It's just so... blech."
"What do you think would feel right? Staying the extra year of leaving early?" Nico's just barely glowed in the darkness.
"That's the thing, I don't know."
I was scared. I didn't know what would be the right decision, what would make everyone happy. What would make my father happy, what would make my friends happy, what would make Clark happy? What would make me feel happy?
"I don't know."